The Ranch
by EKSmith
Summary: After finding himself deep in trouble, Edward accepts an unconventional offer to attend a rehab program for troubled teens and young adults on a ranch in northern Canada.  A story of growing, learning and love.
1. Chapter 1

*PROLOGUE*

_Dear Mr. Edward Masen, _

_We are pleased to announce that you have been accepted into the Therapeutic Residential Treatment Program at "The Ranch at Swan Crossing." Below you will find a brief description of the program. If you shall accept this placement, you will receive a detailed orientation package by mail within three to five business days. _

_The Ranch at Swan Crossing is an alternative treatment facility for young adult males facing potential incarceration or other pertinent legal difficulties due to a variety of unfavourable circumstances. Participants will engage in various types of manual and physical labour, animal grooming and training, and other various tasks as directed. Daily chores will be tended to in a timely and productive fashion. Group and one-on-one therapy sessions will be mandatory. Academic upgrading will be offered to individuals requiring such services. _

_At "The Ranch" we believe that trust and respect are earned through demonstrating hard work, dedication and commitment to the rehabilitation process. Privileges such as social time, day trips away from the ranch, phone calls home, visitors, etc. are allotted based on appropriate behaviour. Failure to comply with the guidelines of "The Ranch at Swan Crossing" will result in dismissal from the program, which may result in further legal action, depending on your situation prior to entering our facilities. _

_Please find attached our detailed Code of Conduct, privacy statement, and a sample of your daily activities. If you have any questions, please call our registry office at the numbers listed below. _

_We hope that you will take the time to consider the benefits of this program to your future well being, and will make a positive choice for your future by joining us at "The Ranch."_

_Sincerely, _

_Lt. Charles Swan, Senior Director_

CHAPTER ONE

EPOV

"The Ranch at Swan Crossing," I said aloud as Carlisle and Esme stared at me across the dining room table for 12 with eyes wide in anticipation. "Is this some kind of fucking joke?"

Of course it wasn't. Carlisle and Esme, my adopted mother and father, have dealt with more of my shit in the last 7 years than anyone should have to in a lifetime.

"Edward –"Carlisle started, and I could instantly tell he was using the "Doctor Cullen" tone on me. That meant one thing, and one thing only – Carlisle was pissed. "We have been through this. If you get in any more trouble, you will have a criminal record. We've exhausted every other option, son. This is an opportunity you can't pass up. I called in a personal favour for you on this Edward. I – "

"This is bullshit. You think sending me away to some inbred backwoods town in freakin' Canada is going to fix this shit?" I yelled, barely registering the words as they fell from my mouth. "You don't know a damn thing about me. I'm a goddamn adult and I don't have to -"

"Enough!" Carlisle stood, his fist slamming to the table as he yelled, causing Esme to jump in her seat in surprise. "You aren't an adult until you start acting like one. I don't give a damn if you're 18 years old. If you give this up," he stalled, taking a deep breath and scrubbing his hand across his jaw, "we can't help you any more, Edward. We've done all that we can."

"Ma, come on..." I looked to Esme. She was my warm place, gentle and kind, always the mediator when I created shit storms in this house. But this time, the look on my warm place's face made me feel sick inside. Her soft, hazel eyes were filled to the brim with tears, ready to pour over with the blink of an eye onto her quivering chin. Carlisle gently placed a hand on her shoulder, and that slight gesture made her choke back a sob.

"Edward...I...I can't..." she sputtered, tears flowing freely. "I'm sorry there isn't more...more we can do...I'm sorry I've, I've let you down." Esme turned her face into Carlisle's side, her shoulders rising and falling with deep sobs. Carlisle's fingers slid gently through her hair, as he sighed heavily.

"You have caused enough pain here, son. We love you, but if you aren't willing to help yourself, we will see to it that you get help elsewhere. No boy of ours will wind up behind bars, do you hear me?" I raised my eyes to his, but couldn't quite decipher what I was seeing there. A mix of anger, grief, sadness and confusion stared back at me, no one emotion showing stronger than the others. "Do you hear me!" he yelled when I failed to answer, stunned sick by the sobs of my Esme. I truthfully didn't care what Carlisle thought I should do, but Esme, my warm sweet Esme, was sad and it was because of me. She didn't deserve that. She deserved better than me in a son, and though I felt like I was going to explode, I couldn't in this moment do another thing to upset her.

"How long?" I spat, in complete shock that even a part of me was willing to go along with this.

"Six weeks," said Carlisle, "we leave a week from today."

**A/N**

**Thanks for reading! This is my first story - I have been reading fanfiction for a long time and thought I'd jump in on the fun! I'm always interested in hearing your thoughts – please let me know what you think!**

**ETA – I have replaced this chapter with the prettier beta'd version – major thanks to my new beta, Robzbeanie, for all of her help!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N **

**S. Meyer owns all the Twilight stuff. I'm just having fun playing in her pool! Also, any places mentioned in this story are nothing more than figments of my imagination. Similar places may exist, but I made all this up. Special thanks to my beta, Robzbeanie, for catching my mistakes. **

The Ranch

Chapter 2

Green. Miles and miles of it. I guess, being in Canada, I should have said kilometres and kilometres of it. If I was being honest with myself I would have admitted that the scenery was breathtaking – winding mountain roads, deep green forests, snow capped mountain tops – but I wasn't. The only thing I was feeling was pissed off. Backed into a corner, and pissed off.

I had 18 hours to think about how pissed off I was. The bus ride from Seattle to the ranch was a solid 18 hours aboard a rickety old bus that smelt like urinal cake and old women's perfume. Every couple of hours or so, we'd stop at a gas station to fuel up and dump off or pick up new passengers. I'd get out and stretch and have a smoke or two. I had never eaten more burgers and fries in my life. My stomach felt like a ball of lead and my knees were aching from being jammed between my seat and the one in front of me. An old man sat in the seat behind me for a good nine hours and snored like a trombone. The smell of diesel fuel burning spread throughout the bus and gave me a headache. I couldn't wait to get there, yet at the same time, I was dreading my arrival. Although I had pamphlets, and pages and pages of information on the Ranch to shift through, I really didn't know what to expect. Carlisle told me that this would build character, but I didn't care. I already was quite a character.

In my last week at home, I barely saw or spoke to Carlisle or Esme. I spent most of it at Mike's place with the guys – it was our typical hangout, and home base for most of the crap we got into. After Mike's parents struck it rich when their sporting goods store was snatched up and turned into a chain, they enjoyed living the high life. Part of that was ensuring their kid had the best of the best – brand new car, swanky apartment, vacations all over the place. You name it, Mike had it. His parents never hesitated to throw cash at whatever mess Mike got caught up in – anything to make it disappear. When Mike was charged with a DUI after wrapping his new Escalade around a lamppost, the charges miraculously disappeared after an afternoon of reading to seniors at the retirement home. Me? I didn't get away with my bad deeds so easily.

Carlisle and Esme were good to me. I often felt like they were too good. I came to live with them when I was eleven years old. I didn't want to, but that wasn't their fault. As a kid, I'd often test their limits and boundaries – see how far I could push before I'd get a reaction. It started small – pushing back my bedtime, twisting their words, asking the other one for permission even though the first already said no. Problem was - I never really grew out of it. Hence the 18-hour ride on the potty bus up to Camp Nowhere. I piled on that straw that broke the camel's back, added insult to injury – whatever the little clichéd saying Carlisle was always using, I did it. I pushed and pushed, and always wondered what it would take for them to send me packing. Esme sent me texts all week begging me to come home for dinner, to come spend some time with them before I left, to play some cards like we used to. The way I saw it, they wanted me out of their way, so why should I? My freedom was coming to an abrupt halt, and I needed to make the most of it.

I spent the bulk of my week wasting time drinking and smoking at Mike's, playing Call of Duty by day, entertaining the ladies by night. The lifestyle Mike led kept a steady stream of girls flowing in and out of his apartment. None of them ever held my attention for long, but to be fair, nothing did. I messed around, commitment free, and the girls were just as happy with that arrangement as I was. Jessica Stanley was the only one of the bunch who'd come around looking for more. She called me crying the night before I left, telling me that she'd miss me and that she'd wait for me – whatever the hell that was supposed to mean. Jessica, while nice to look at, didn't have a lot going on upstairs. I was decent to her, unlike some of the guys in our group, but I didn't see her the way she saw me. You ask a girl to prom, and suddenly she thinks you're engaged or some shit.

I graduated from high school three months ago, in June. I had picked up college applications, and with my grades I would have been accepted. I always did fairly well without having to try too hard. I could have gotten in, but I didn't. Forgetting to send in your application before the deadline will do that. So instead, I cleaned part time at the hospital Carlisle worked at. It gave me some cash to blow, and the work was pretty slack. Well, for me it was. Flirting a little with Ms. Mallory, the janitorial supervisor, got me out of any trouble I caught for doing a half-assed job. Carlisle and Esme never hesitated to tell me how disappointed they were that I wasn't "utilizing my potential." They were constantly nagging at me that "idle hands were the devil's playground" – again with the clichés. I never gave it much thought. I was young, and having a good time was all that really mattered. I didn't see what the big hurry to grow up was all about.

I shouldn't have been surprised when the local chief of police showed up on our doorstep, sat Esme and Carlisle down, and discussed my recent endeavours. Public Intoxication. Open liquor in a public place. Possession of a fake I.D. There were more, but those were the basics. Nothing too terrible, as far as I was concerned. Apparently my parents had different ideas. They told me how worried they were, and how they didn't want me spending any more time with the friends I had. Carlisle yelled and Esme cried. It wasn't the first time this happened, and I didn't expect it to be the last. But this time, when Carlisle said he was serious, he obviously meant it. A week after that very meeting, I was agreeing to board a bus to the North Pole and basically signing my life away.

The farther north we went, the sparser the scenery. Scattered farms and trees lined the highways for increasingly long stretches between towns. I noticed the chill in the air getting cooler with every smoke break I took. According to my watch, my trip was coming to a close. The next stop would be the Swan Crossing gas station and bus depot. A handwritten note stapled to the front of my welcome package said, "You'll be catching a ride to the Ranch with Emmett. He will be the biggest guy there. You can't miss him." This irritated me to no end. How the hell did they know who would be there waiting? Did they mean fat or tall? The last thing I needed was to be stranded at some Bates Motel type gas station in a backwoods Podunk town with no more than $8.00 in my ass pocket.

I felt my ears pop as we descended into a deep valley. The bus driver announced on the intercom that we would be arriving at the station in a few moments and to pack up all of our belongings.

I grabbed my bag from the overhead cabin and stepped off the bus inside the station. I took a look around, hoping to figure out who the hell this "big guy" was without too much difficulty or embarrassment. The only people seated inside where a few younger teens, an elderly woman asleep in her chair, and a younger lady with two screaming twins in a side-by-side stroller. Definitely no "big guy." I pulled my pack of smokes from my pocket and figured I'd step out for one. I had no choice but to hurry up and wait.

I plucked a cigarette from my pack and stuck it between my lips as I pushed open the heavy metal door leading out of the bus terminal. Suddenly, the heavy door that I was pushing gave away from me, and I damn near tripped out of the building.

"What the hell!" I yelled, once I gained my balance back.

"You Edward?" a deep voice said, as I looked up into the chest of one of the biggest men I've ever seen up close. I'd obviously found Emmett. I was pretty tall – just over 6' – but this guy was huge. The stern expression on his face showed me he wasn't about to tolerate any crap, either.

"Yeah," I said, clearly annoyed. "How'd you know?"

"I know your type," he chuckled while he plucked the unlit cigarette from my lips with his giant fingers and threw it over his shoulder. "Now let's get out of here, Eddie. I'm missing dinner."

He snatched my bag from my shoulder and with very little effort tossed it into the back of a shiny, black jacked-up pickup truck. He climbed up into the driver's side of the truck with ease.

I don't know what exactly I was waiting for, but I stood there feeling kind of stunned. The hum of the window on the passenger side of the truck unrolling snapped me out of my daze.

"You coming, Eddie, or you just gonna camp out here?" Emmett barked. "Charlie doesn't like waiting."

"Yeah," I nodded, feeling the anxiety I'd been pushing down all day creeping up my throat from the pit of my stomach. "I guess I am."

**Up next….The Ranch! Let me know what you think of Edward. Thanks so much for reading!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N **

**Happy New Year, guys! Thanks so much for reading – I'm really having fun working on this story. This chapter is now beta'd by the lovely Robzbeanie. She's been wonderful at polishing up my not-so-perfect grammar and punctuation! I love to hear what you think – what you like, what you don't – I'm open to all of it! xoxo**

The Ranch

Chapter Three

"You've been awful quiet there, Eddie," Emmett said, breaking the silence in the cab of his oversized truck. We'd been driving for 15 minutes, and hadn't spoken a word to each other.

"I've got nothing to say," I muttered back. After spending all that time cooped up in that bus, I was in no mood for idle chit chat.

"Grumpy too. Surprise, surprise." Emmett mumbled to himself while rolling his eyes at me.

"Maybe I wouldn't be grumpy if I could've had a damn smoke. What? Can't smoke at this place either?" I barked. I knew from the reading material that alcohol and drugs were not tolerated whatsoever on site at The Ranch, but there was no mention of smoking.

"No!" Emmett chuckled. "You can smoke outside, since you're legal age. I just don't like it." He prattled on to himself, laughing and shaking his head.

I reached over and turned up the volume on the dashboard radio. I leaned my head against the window, my eyes drifting closed as I watched the town limits disappear in the side view mirror.

I didn't exactly plan on falling asleep, but I startled awake with a jolt when I felt Emmett's huge hand shaking my shoulder.

"We're here, kid. Grab your bag – it's time to meet Charlie," Emmett said, as he jumped out of his truck.

I jumped out of the truck cab and climbed on top of the rear tire to retrieve my bag. Hopping down, I took a minute to take the place in. Deep, thick woods surrounded us on every side but one, where the hill that the property rested on sloped off into a valley. Straight in front of me was an absolutely gigantic farm house. It was beautiful – two stories, lots of big windows, wood siding, crisp white trim and a gigantic wraparound porch. Down the hill around the house, I could make out several small sheds and buildings, as well as a big red barn. Tractors and other machinery I didn't recognize were parked under an overhang attached to what looked to be a stable. The heavy smell of farm was thick in the air around me – I recognized it from our yearly trip to a farm outside of Seattle every Thanksgiving, when Esme would insist we go pick out an organic turkey. I didn't like it then, and I certainly didn't care for it now.

The Ranch didn't look anything like I had expected. I had two theories in my head, and neither would have shocked me – the first was a cold, sterile and jail like compound with barred-up windows and uniformed security. The second visual I worked up was hillbilly central – I wouldn't have been surprised to pull up to car parts scattered across the lawn and random animals drinking out of abandoned buckets, complete with a flaming tire fire.

My predictions were clearly off. This place was neat, tidy and quaint. If Esme was here, she would've been going on about how cute and sweet it was – commenting on the porch swing, the hanging flower baskets, or the gazebo tucked away in the trees just to the right of the house. Part of me wished she was here. I quickly shoved that thought aside as I made my way up towards the front steps.

Emmett was waiting for me on the porch, holding open the old-fashioned screen door. "You doing ok there, Eddie?" he asked, perched against the door frame with his bulky arms crossed in front of his chest. I hated the name Eddie. "The quicker you get in here, the quicker you can meet Charlie and the quicker we can eat."

"Yeah, I'm coming," I muttered, stepping through the doorway. Almost instantly, my stomach roared to life. The smell of apples, cinnamon and something I couldn't quite put my finger on attacked my senses. My mouth started watering, and I licked my lips.

"Smells good, don't it?" Emmett said with a sly grin. "See kid? I don't hurry for nothing. Charlie's office is the first door on the left," he said, pointing through a sitting room right off the entrance to a large wood door. Everywhere I looked there was wood - large wooden beams sprawled across the vaulted ceilings, light shiny wood covered the floors, and a thick wooden mantle decorated the top of a large stone fireplace.

"Drop your bag here. Charlie will give you the rundown, and then I'll introduce you to some of the folks around here. Meet me in the kitchen when you're done." With that he turned the corner heading in the direction of the amazing smell.

I stepped through the sitting room, taking a moment to admire the impressive fireplace and comfortable surroundings. Looking over at the chocolate brown overstuffed leather couches, topped with soft, fuzzy white throw blankets, I realized how tired out the trip made me. I was looking forward to nothing more than finding my room and getting some sleep. I paused just outside the door, took a deep breath and knocked softly with the back of my knuckles.

"Come on in, boy," a deep, gruff voice said. I pushed the heavy door open and stepped inside. Seated behind a large mahogany desk was none other than Mr. Charlie Swan. Although my assumptions on what this place would look like were way off, my assumptions for what Charlie Swan would look like were bang on.

Cowboy hat? Check.

Plaid shirt? Check.

Shit Kickers? Check.

Moustache? Check, check, check.

"I'm Edward," I said, stepping into the room and closer to the desk. Charlie rose from his seat and walked over to me with a stretched-out hand. I reached mine out and joined his to shake, and was surprised by the strength of his grasp.

"Well, Edward. Why don't you have a seat?" Charlie said as he quickly looked me up and down, then nodded his head towards the leather chairs facing his desk. . "We've got a few basics to cover, and then I'll let you off for the night. Tomorrow, it will be business as usual," he said as he perched himself on the front edge of his massive desk and crossed his arms and his ankles.

"First off, Edward, I understand you've read the manuals I've sent you?"

"Yeah, I did," I replied.

"Good," Charlie said abruptly. "So then, Edward," he started, "Tell me what you hope to gain here at The Ranch."

I looked down at my hands in my lap. I was tired, hungry and quickly becoming annoyed. I had no clue what I was hoping to gain here – all I knew was that I didn't have any real choice in coming, and that for six weeks I was basically to do what I was told. This guy was putting me on the spot. I just got here, and I was already tired of it.

"I don't know. Carlisle and Esme think it will keep me out of trouble or something. I –"

"I know what Carlisle and Esme think, boy," he interrupted, as the tension in the room tripled. "And I think it's about time you start thinking for yourself." He peered over his desk at me, his expression cool and hard. "Anyway -" he started, relaxing a bit while exhaled a deep breath,

"I realize you've come a long way tonight, so we'll let this go for now. In a few days time though, boy, I'm gonna be calling on you. I want you to give my question some careful thought, you hear?"

"Yeah - got it." I said dismissively.

"That's 'Yes, Sir,' boy – I won't be reminding you of that again," he retorted, as he pushed up his sleeves. Without missing a beat, he continued –

"Now, your room is on the upper level. Take a right up the stairs, and you'll come to your hallway. There are two bedrooms and a shared bathroom – yours is the green room. Jasper Whitlock will be sharing quarters with you – he'll be in the red room across the hall. You will be introduced to Jasper this evening at dinner. After dinner, you can retire to your room." He paused briefly to clear his throat. I furrowed my eyebrows and slouched in my seat. I wasn't a child and I certainly didn't appreciate being schooled like one.

"You must be in your room every night by 9:30 pm, unless I tell you differently. What you do on your own time in there is up to you, but I suggest you sleep. I want you downstairs in the kitchen, showered and ready for breakfast tomorrow morning at 6:00 am. Not a minute late." He paused briefly and glanced at his watch, and then the clock on the wall. "Do I need to repeat any of that, Edward?" he said, his expression still hard. Even if I had missed anything, I got the feeling that now was not the time to say so. I figured that the sooner I agreed, the sooner I could get the hell out of here.

"No. I mean, no Sir," I mumbled, quickly catching my slip.

"Good. Dinner is ready in the kitchen. Find Emmett in there – he'll show you to your quarters and take care of introductions. I'll be seeing you in the morning."

I nodded up at Charlie from my seat, unsure if we were finished here and of what my next move should be. I rubbed my palms up and down my thighs a few times, almost standing, but waiting for Charlie to dictate my next move.

"What are you waiting for, kid?" Charlie said, sounding amused as he pulled a stack of papers from his filing cabinet, dropping them in a heap on the surface of his desk. "You'll quickly learn around here that when dinner's ready, you best be gettin' there quick!" He shook his head and chuckled to himself.

I could feel Charlie's stare on me as I made my way to the door. As my hand reached the doorknob, Charlie's voice boomed back at me, "Oh, and Edward – " he said as I turned back to him, "Welcome to The Ranch."

As I made my way out of Charlie's office, I strained my ears and followed the muffled sounds of talking and laughter. The closer I got to the voices, the stronger the smells – I felt and heard my stomach come alive for the second time since I'd been here.

With my stomach getting impatient, I rushed through another sitting area – this one featuring wall to wall bookshelves. I spun around the corner to what I assumed was the kitchen - and smacked square into a petite brunette girl, carrying a giant bowl full of salad. I stumbled backwards as she shrieked out at the top of her lungs, sending the salad bowl flying, and landing flat on her ass.

"I'm so sorry" I rushed out as I quickly reached my hand out to help the girl up. Cackling and laughter erupted from the kitchen. I looked up to see Emmett standing behind the girl, who was bent down picking pieces of lettuce off her lap from behind her thick brown hair.

Emmett was turning pink and giggling like a school girl. He looked down at the small girl on the floor, placed his giant hands on her delicate shoulders, and then looked back up at me. "Edward," he snorted, as her brushed her hair away from her face "Meet Bella."

**Thanks again for sticking with me! Chapter 4 is in the works!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Thank you to my wonderful beta, Robzbeanie for making this sparkle. She is speedy and wonderful. Also, thank you to CShepherd91 for pre-reading and thought sharing. You guys are great! XOXO Twilight isn't mine – I'm just having fun with the characters.**

Chapter 4

The Ranch

_Emmett was turning pink and giggling like a school girl. He looked down at the girl on the floor, placed his giant hands on her delicate shoulders, and then looked back up at me. "Edward," he snorted, as he brushed her hair away from her face, "Meet Bella"._

I was stunned. She was breathtaking – delicate features, pouty lips. Definitely hot, and I just made a giant ass of myself in front of her. I thrust my hand out, thinking that helping her up was the least I could do, but quickly drew it back when I realized she was just staring at it. Looking up at me behind that thick veil of hair was a wide pair of doe eyes, and a deep scowl. She's was pissed – and I couldn't blame her.

"Um, hi," I stammered, while I reached down and plucked a piece of lettuce from her lap. I don't know what made me think that touching her was a good idea, but I wasn't really thinking things through at that moment.

"Don't!" she barked at me, while she quickly scrambled off the floor. "Watch where you're going – and grab a plate." She stomped off around the corner, leaving the salad bowl and bits of lettuce scattered across the hardwood.

"You make a great first impression there, Eddie," Emmett chuckled as he bent down to pick up the contents of the salad bowl that weren't decorating Bella. "Sure know how to charm the ladies, eh?"

I snorted back at him and glanced around the kitchen. Giant bowls overflowing with pasta, three different types of sauces, and several loaves of garlic bread covered the surface of a wide island in the middle of the large room. A bunch of people were crowded around it, engaging in chitchat while holding up empty plates and waiting to dish up buffet style.

"Grab a plate," Emmett said as he pushed past me towards the crowd.

"Hey, guys," he boomed over the chatter. Everyone quieted right down for him. "This here's Edward. He's gonna be with us for a few weeks, so let's do our best to make him feel at home, okay?"

Heads nodded throughout the room, and a couple "Uh-huhs" were muttered.

"Now, let's make this quick –back there we've got Sam, Embry, Jake and Quil," he said as he pointed out the four guys lining the back side of the island. They all nodded their heads at me in succession, except for Quil, who stuck his tongue out at me while holding up his fingers in peace signs. Jake quickly elbowed him in the side. The four guys bore a strong resemblance to one another – all tall and dark – and I figured they were probably related somehow.

"This lovely specimen, is my fiancée – Rosalie – you'll be getting to know her soon enough. She does the one-on-one and group therapy." Emmett gestured towards her with a wide, cheesy grin.

The curvy blonde smiled up at me and gave a little wave. "Welcome, Edward," she said as she scooped herself up some linguini. "I've heard a lot about you. We'll talk soon, ok?" she nodded, her sweet, smooth voice rising at the end. She was smokin' – Emmett was a lucky guy.

"And this here, Eddie-boy," Emmett said, gesturing to a shorter, fare-skinned blond guy, "is Jasper – he'll be sharing quarters with you while you're staying in the main house."

"Pleasure to meet you there, Edward," he said with a mischievous grin. "You don't like salad?" The entire group erupted in laughter, and I could feel my cheeks getting hot.

I shook my head and chuckled to myself. I was expecting a house full of melancholy rejects. These guys seemed alright – and the ladies were especially easy on the eyes. I was certain I'd find things to complain about in the morning – at least for right now the company was decent.

Everyone pretty much ate in silence, with the exception of Rosalie and Emmett who spoke in low whispers to one another. Hunched over their plates around the oversized dining room table, the guys barely took the time to come up for air. The pasta really was that good. I was tempted to get up for seconds, but I wasn't in the mood to ask permission, and had no idea if that was even expected of me. I was exhausted. I wanted to eat, shower and sleep. I didn't need a lecture on being "rude" from someone I had just met.

About halfway through our meal, Bella rejoined the group, flopping into the seat left empty between Jake and Quil. Her hair was tied back in a knot, and she was wearing a new shirt – a clean green t-shirt with "U of A" printed across the chest in gold letters. With her hair back, I got a better look at her face. She was pretty – in a different way than the girls I knew back home. If she was wearing makeup, you wouldn't know it. She looked healthy too, if that makes any sense. Every so often, Jake would lean over and whisper something in her ear. Bella's cheeks would turn pink and she'd giggle and nudge his ribs.

Once everyone was finished, Emmett instructed us all to clear our plates. Sam and Embry were on dish duty – something I was informed I'd be signed up for. Household chores worked on a rotation – we all had our share of jobs that would be posted on the back of our bedroom door each week, along with our farm duties.

"Who's up for a round of dominoes? I've got a score to settle with Mr. Whitlock. You're goin' down!" Emmett boomed in Jasper's direction.

"I'm in – " Jasper replied, again with a mischievous grin, "but only if Bella's playing. I need someone to make sure you aren't slippin' dominoes under the table."

"Me and Bella are in," Jake yelled from across the kitchen. He and Bella were busy packaging up leftovers and basically keeping to themselves.

Jake caught my stare from across the kitchen and hollered at me, "How 'bout you, Edwin? Or do kids from the city not play board games? Is there a dominoes App?" he snorted.

Since I had stepped foot off the bus and met Emmett, he'd been loosely poking fun at me. I was cool with it. I was the new guy so it was kind of expected, and something about the way he went about it told me his intentions were good. This didn't feel the same way.

"I'm thinking I'll just head to bed. It's been a long day," I said, addressing Jake and the others.

"Figures," Jake fired back. "We've all been working our tails off since the crack of dawn. What've you been doing? Sleeping on a bus?"

"You call sitting in your truck listening to your iPod work, meathead?" Quil quickly interrupted and shot me a grin. At least someone was somewhat on my side.

"Enough, you two," Emmett scolded. "You're free to do what you want, Edward. A good sleep is probably a good idea. Breakfast will be ready by six, and I highly suggest you aren't late."

xoxo

When I awoke the next morning, the sun had barely made an appearance in the sky. I had a pain in my neck and my lower back was on fire. I figured it was the new bed. My room was alright – a single bed, desk with an older computer and a side table with a reading lamp were pretty much all there was to it. Everything was a deep forest green – the comforter on the bed, the sheets, the rug. I was used to sleeping on a King-sized mattress at Esme and Carlisle's. A twin was going to take some getting used to. I was so worn out from the trip, I could've slept anywhere. I was out as soon as my head hit the pillow.

I set my alarm for 5:45. Apparently, 15 minutes wasn't enough time to get dressed, use the can and get my hair looking somewhat together. It had a mind of its own, but sleeping in a cramped bed just made it worse.

As I stumbled down the stairs at exactly 5:58, still bleary eyed, I met a sweat-covered Emmett crossing the main hallway. "Morning, kid," he said to me in passing. "Get in that kitchen quick! Charlie's out front."

A bowl of warm muffins was sitting on top of the counter beside a pitcher of orange juice. I quickly sucked down some juice, and crammed in a muffin while I manoeuvred back to the front door.

Sure enough, Charlie was waiting for me just in front of the main house. He was leaning against the back end of an atv, cowboy boots crossed at the ankle, the brim of his hat hanging low over his forehead.

"You're late, kid," he said. "Haven't I told you I don't like late?"

"Um, it's only 6:00 now, Sir." I looked at my watch and sure enough, it was exactly 6:00 a.m. "You told me to be in the kitchen at six."

"I know what time it is, boy, and I also know what I told you. Do you always leave things to the very last minute?"

"Um, sometimes I do," I stammered. I had no idea where he was going with this.

"In your life, Edward, you're gonna meet many people who have high expectations of you. You aren't just going to meet those expectations. You're gonna go above and beyond them, then blow them out of the water, you hear?"

"Yes, Sir," I replied, trying to hide my annoyance and confusion. I figured this was one of those situations where saying less was more.

"Alright then. Follow me. Today, you're doing the chicken coop."

**Thank you so much for reading. I always love to hear your thoughts!**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN - S. Meyer owns all the Twilight stuff. Huge thanks to my awesome beta, Robzbeanie, for being quick and awesome. Also, big thanks to CShepherd91 for pre-reading and pimping. You guys are wonderful! xoxo**

**Also – I made a boo boo posting this a few moments ago – here's the proper copy! =)**

The Ranch

Chapter 5

"Doing the coop?" I asked. I had no idea what a chicken coop looked like, and what "doing it" was supposed to mean. I instantly pictured one of those giant warehouses that held thousands of chickens from that food production documentary Esme made Carlisle and me watch.

"Yeah, boy. A coop. You're cleaning it," Charlie said gruffly. I was starting to get the feeling that he was a man of few words, but the ones he used, he used wisely.

We walked in silence down a gravel path leading away from the house and through several small buildings and fenced-in pens. The air was chilly and damp – little drops of moisture stuck to both the leaves on the trees and the grass. I was beginning to wish I'd worn more than a t-shirt. The sun had yet to make a full appearance, and was creeping over the edge of the valley in the distance. The sky was lighting up pinks and oranges. If I wasn't so tired and annoyed, I probably could have enjoyed it.

I thought about how my mom, my real mom, and I used to enjoy sunsets and sunrises. She'd wake me up just to see them. Those were some of our best times together, even though nothing was really ever said. I quickly brushed those thoughts aside and picked up my pace to match Charlie's.

I could tell we were getting close to this coop – I could hear birds clucking and squawking. Charlie walked up a ramp leading into a medium-sized shed. The door had a heavy latch, and stretching from the corners of the building a large square of barbed fence enclosed a pen of flapping and waddling birds. I noticed another ramp leading into the fenced area from inside the coop. I imagined the chickens marching up and down it military style in single file and I snickered to myself.

I noticed Jake and Quil pulling out tools and car parts, setting them out on sheets on the grass around a large, rusty reddish-brown pickup. Quil gave a small wave, but Jake didn't acknowledge us.

Charlie pushed the large door wide open. I was instantly hit with the smell of pee, straw and old food. I couldn't quite nail down the specifics, but it was gross: hot, humid and smelled like shit. I didn't want Charlie to think I was a pussy, but I was having a really hard time keeping my disgust to myself.

"So, Edward. This is how this is gonna go," Charlie began, glancing sideways at me with a grin on his face as he took in my expression.

"First, you're gonna clear out all the old bedding here," he pointed to the dirty straw littering the floor. "Then you're gonna scrub her clean – every surface – then rinse it all, break for lunch and replace the bedding. I've got a bucket of wash water and a brush outside. Scrub her good, you hear? If you miss spots, bacteria will grow and the birds will get sick. We only do a good scrub like this twice a year, so it's gotta be done right."

His expression was stern – apparently cleaning the coop was something that wasn't to be taken lightly. Go figure that they'd leave the nastiest job to the new kid.

"Any questions, Edward?" he asked as he hooked his thumbs in his belt loops.

"No, Sir. I'm good," I mumbled in as chipper of a voice as I could muster. I told myself, from the moment I realized that I was coming here, that I'd do my best to just shut up and get the work done. I think I was possibly holding out for the chance to get out early on good behaviour or something. Arguing wasn't going to get me anywhere – I was smart enough to realize that – and I just didn't have the energy for it. I resolved to give as little as was required, slap on a happy face and get sent back to Seattle all fixed up – shiny and new. I was convinced I could pull off the charade.

"Good then, boy. Before I go, one last thing," he said as he made his way down the ramp. "When you leave the coop – even for a minute – you latch that door. There's a ton of coyotes around here, and they're sneaky. You got it? We've got that barbed fence up for a reason."

"Yes, Sir," I nodded. As disgusting as the job was, the details were simple. The smell was the worst part of it all. At least the birds weren't still inside. It would've been a lot more difficult to play the happy act with a bunch of poultry flapping shit and feathers in my face.

Charlie eyed me over, nodded once, and made his way across the yard to Quil and Jake. I picked up the shovel leaning against the coop and started scooping.

Four hours later, I was ready to punch someone. My nose was burning from the ammonia smell. My fingertips were raw and blisters were developing on the edge of my palm from the scrub brush I was wielding. The wash bucket was lying dented on its side. I may or may not have kicked it in a particularly heated moment of frustration.

Cleaning the coop was far more difficult than I had originally imagined. Every dried-on layer of chicken shit I scraped off revealed a thick fresh layer beneath it. The damp straw clung to the corners and reeked. I smelled vile, and couldn't wait for my next shower.

Sometime later, with a fresh dented bucket of wash water in hand, I was starting to see progress. I was startled out of my muttering and cursing by the sound of footsteps on the ramp outside.

"Hey. You alive in here?" yelled out Bella. She leaned up against the door frame of the coop with her arms crossed over her chest. "My dad said I'm supposed to tell you lunch is almost ready." I hadn't realized that Bella was Charlie's daughter. Once I thought about it though, I realized they shared the same dark eyes.

She strolled casually around the coop and inspected the surfaces I'd been slaving over by running her fingertips across the wood. Her hair was gathered high on top of her head in a ponytail. She had on a pair of dark blue jeans and a tight black t-shirt. As she bent down to peek in the corners, I was awarded with a view of her tight little ass. I figured Charlie wouldn't appreciate me checking out his daughter, so in a way, I was sticking it to The Man. That fact almost instantly improved my mood.

"Does it pass your test?" I snorted at her, still admiring her backside. After the shit – the literal shit – I'd put up with this morning, I practically dared her to call me out on my work.

She peered up at me over her shoulder and jumped up when she followed my gaze. She furrowed her eyebrows and cleared her throat at me in disgust.

"You're all the same," Bella barked. She looked kind of cute, all red-faced and mad.

"I'm sorry, I uh– " I mumbled. I was busted, so I might as well have owned it.

"Whatever," she shot back, "You actually haven't done that bad of a job. Took ya long enough though." She snorted.

"I think I did a pretty fucking good job," I snapped. "Look at my hands!" I thrust my upturned palms in her direction.

"Aw, princess. Did you forget your hand cream?" she giggled at me. "Rosalie's always looking for a manicure buddy."

"Shut up. You think you're funny, Bella?" She was ticking me off, but my tone was light. It was a much better idea to be on the boss man's daughter's good side than her bad one. After the salad incident, I had some wooing to do.

"Not funny, Edward, just right. I know your type." She looked amused and leaned back against the opposite door frame. "Lemme guess – you're indestructible and never wrong? Hate your parents? Like to burn things?"

"What the hell?" I snorted at her. "The first two, hell yeah, but no...wait, who likes to burn things?"

"Never mind," she shook her head back and forth, grinning widely and pulling her bottom lip between her teeth. "Just come in for lunch, okay?" She turned and made her way out of the coop, jumping off the ramp and breaking into a run in the direction of Quil and Jake.

I watched Bella run off from just behind the doorway of the coop. Bella was hot and funny – a combination I didn't come across much at home. The guys that I hung around with in Seattle were mostly just concerned with hot. Bella was a lot more intriguing – I wanted to find out more. I decided there in that chicken coop that flirting with the boss man's daughter would definitely be a fun way to pass my time. I'd just have to be careful to not get caught.

Giving the coop a final rinse, I packed up my cleaning gear and made my way back to the house. I didn't notice anyone else around, but did see Jake still buried under the hood of the truck he'd been working on all morning.

I made my way through the main hall and headed towards the dining room. I stopped briefly in my tracks when I heard Bella's voice.

"Dammit Quil, give it up," she said, "He's just my friend – we're cool."

"So is what you and Jake were doing after the Farmer's Day fireworks what all friends do? I need some more girls in my life, man!" Quil joked back.

I crept up to the entrance way just out of sight. From around the corner I could see Emmett and Quil seated at the dining room table; books, pencils and a calculator spread out all around them. Bella was holding a platter full of sandwiches, just out of my line of sight.

"Does Charlie know about this?" Emmett asked.

"Oh my God, no – and he's not going to either," Bella shot back, sounding anxious.

"Gross Bells, you're not supposed to be doing that crap, and if you are I don't want to know. Jake, Bells? Really? " Emmett scrubbed his hands across his face, trying to wipe away his distressed expression.

"Oh please, Em, I'm 19 – and not a nun."

"Yeah, but you're my cousin, and it's sick."

Bella picked up a sandwich and motioned to throw it at him. Instantly, the atmosphere in the room was light again. I figured it was a good time to announce my presence – I didn't want to get caught sneaking around eavesdropping on something so silly.

I was interested though – I had a feeling there was something going on between Bella and Jake. I actually thought they might have been a couple after seeing how close they were at dinner the night before. Apparently, I had a lot to learn about all the people here. As Carlisle always said, in his typical, clichéd way – when you assume, you make an "ass out of u and me" – or something like that.

"Hey guys," I said as I made my way towards the dining table.

"Shit, Eddie. You stink – I can smell you from here!" Emmett yelled at me from across the room. Looking down at my clothes, I realized how filthy I was. I was immune to the smell at that point, but judging from my clothes, I had to be pretty ripe. I sort of forgot as the morning wore on.

"Ew, Edward," Bella giggled. "Why don't you go clean up a little? The soup is almost ready."

"Yeah – I think I'll do that," I nodded, kind of embarrassed that I hadn't thought to shower first. I definitely wouldn't want to eat lunch next to someone that looked like I did. "I'll be back in a few."

I made my way upstairs and pulled out some clean jeans and a plain black t-shirt. I quickly swapped out the black for blue when I remembered that Bella was wearing black. I don't know why, but I didn't want to match.

I was in and out of the shower within a few minutes. All of the scrubbing that morning really worked up my appetite. I quickly dressed, ran my towel through my hair and made my way back downstairs.

Halfway down the staircase, I noticed Jake, Bella and Charlie gathered around the door of Charlie's office.

"There's the idiot now," Jake snarled at me.

"Excuse me?" I said. This guy had been nothing but a jerk to me from the moment we met. I had no idea what the hell his problem could've been now.

"You forgot to close the latch on the door of the coop, moron," he said, his voice angry and low.

I went back through my steps – I set down my shovel, dumped out the water, closed the door and latched it. I was sure of it.

"What the hell are you talking about? I latched it!" I yelled. "What the hell's the big deal, anyway?"

"The big deal, Edward," Charlie said as he stepped through the doorway, making his presence known. Bella stood off to his side, biting her lip and looking at the floor. "Is that Jake caught a coyote trying to sneak in the coop just a few minutes ago. I'd like to hear your version of these events, boy, and I want the truth. Let's hear it."

"I swear, Sir, I shut the latch," I said, as I made my way down the rest of the stairs. "I'm certain I did."

"It didn't just open itself, dumbass," Jake sneered.

"Jake – that'll be all. You and Bella get started on lunch," Charlie admonished, raising one eyebrow at him. Jake nodded and turned the corner with Bella in tow.

"Now listen, Edward. I had specific expectations of you, isn't that right?"

"Yes, Sir, but I–"

"No buts. Tell me something about trust, Edward."

I looked Charlie right in the face, trying to figure out what the hell he was after. This guy was vague – I had no idea what he wanted from me. It wasn't often that I couldn't talk my way out of trouble, or at least lessen the punishment. With Charlie though, he sprang questions on me I never expected. I never knew what was coming.

"Trust, Sir?" I asked again, lowering my gaze to the floor in contemplation.

"That's what I said."

"Oh, um," I stammered, "Well...uh...you earn it." I looked back up at him hesitantly.

"And how do you 'spose you're gonna earn mine, Edward, if you can't follow basic instructions? You've got the nerve to ask what the big deal is?" He stepped closer to me, the vein on his forehead bulging as sweat gathered on his brow.

"I'm a reasonable man, boy, but your blatant disregard for any responsibility on this matter concerns me. This could have been a big deal, and you're lucky it's not." He stepped back and ran his sleeve across his forehead.

I nodded, squeezing my fingers into my palms at my side in an attempt to control my growing frustrations. I knew I wasn't in the wrong. Charlie started pacing in a short line in front of me.

"An honest man takes responsibility for his actions, Edward. If something goes wrong on your watch, you own that. You find out why. You don't blow it off like it doesn't matter. It matters."

He stopped short and stared at me. "Do you understand what I'm getting at here, boy?"

I nodded at him, "Yes, Sir." I almost started in on my innocence again, but bit my tongue.

"Now boy, Bella tells me you did do a thorough job. I'm gonna look past this indiscretion, but I expect you to reflect on what I talked to you about here. And don't go thinking I forgot about our little chat the other day – I hope you've been giving thought to what you're hoping to gain here," Charlie said, crossing his arms across his chest.

"I have, Sir," I lied. I was actually kind of glad for the reminder.

"Well, good. We'll meet again soon. Go on to lunch. After you eat, I want you and Jasper to grab the quads and head out to fix the broken fence down by the creek. Follow Jasper's lead, you got it?"

I nodded. Quads, or ATVs as we called them back home, sounded like fun. Fixing a fence had to be easier than cleaning out that chicken coop. I needed the time to get away and clear my head. I was pissed at Jake. I didn't think I'd done anything to piss him off, but apparently he had it out for me. At this point, I could bite my tongue, but I wasn't sure how long that could last.

"Alright then, Edward," Charlie concluded, "Think about what I said. Do a good job with Jasper, and we'll see you back for dinner at 6:00 – and boy, for the love of God, don't be late."

**Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I always love to hear your thoughts! Follow me on twitter - eksmith07 – I'll generally tweet a heads up for the next chapter. Updates will be every week, two weeks max. Thanks again for joining along! =)**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N S. Meyer owns Twilight. Special thanks to my awesomely wonderful beta Robzbeanie, and fabulous pre-reader CShepherd91. You guys are the best! Thanks so much for reading! xoxo**

The Ranch

Chapter 6

"See this?" Jasper pointed with the toe of his boot at a lever above the footrest of the quad. "That's your gear shift. Lift it with your toe for up, press it for down – let your engine be your guide. You'll hear her rev when it needs a shift," he directed. "Just follow my lead, alright? You got all that?" he asked.

"Yeah, I'm good," I nodded as I straddled the seat. Jasper had given me the full rundown, even though I'd driven an ATV once before when Mike's parents rented him one for his birthday. I was pretty sure I remembered the basics.

I hadn't said much since my lecture from Charlie. Lunch was eaten in almost complete silence – Jake, being the asshole that he was, glared at me with a sneer from across the dining room for the duration of the meal. I knew that if I opened my mouth that what would have come out wouldn't have been pretty. I gave him the stink eye back, twitched my fingers, pulled at my hair – all that stuff that helped me keep my mouth shut and my brain from exploding. He just sat there looking pleased with himself.

I was ready to blow off some steam, and hoped the quad ride would do just that. Back at home, when I would get in arguments with Carlisle and Esme, I'd handle it by getting drunk off my face at Mike's place. The wilder the party, the better. What would start out at Mike's, would often lead to a drunken rampage through town, and end with a ride in the back of Police Chief Banner's car. Clearly, that wasn't an option here, but an adrenaline rush seemed to be the next best thing.

"We'd better pull outta here soon, Edward. We've gotta get back before dark," Jasper said as he straddled the seat of his machine. I noticed being so far north that the sun set early and rose late, and clearly Jasper was familiar with the concept.

Jasper reached around and tightened the straps on the fully stocked utility box on the back of his ATV, along with a large coil of barbed wire. I offered to take some of the gear, but Jasper just laughed at me. Instead, he loaded me up with a cooler full of snacks and some water bottles.

Jasper was prompting me to get going, but he wasn't anxious. I gathered that Jasper was a pretty chill guy. During lunch, when tension was thick in the dining room, Jasper seemed completely unaffected by it. He just ate his lunch in peace with a grin on his face while glancing between Jake and me, like you would at a tennis match. As Carlisle would say, he didn't sweat the small stuff.

We started the engines, slid on our helmets and pulled out. I followed Jasper at a steady speed, slightly to his right to avoid eating his dirt. The ATV, or quad, as Jasper told me to get used to saying, was easy to handle. The trail we were travelling on was bumpy, but the ground was dry and firm. My thumb was getting twitchy on the throttle, and I was eager to see what the machine was capable of. In the thick brush we were moving through, speed wasn't really an option.

About a half an hour later, we were thickly buried in brush and trees. I wouldn't have been able to find my way back if my life depended on it. My ass was getting numb from the vibration of the seat, and my thumb was getting a cramp from being stuck in place on the throttle.

Jasper slowed down to a standstill and shut off his quad.

"What the hell are we stopping here for? I don't see any fence!" I yelled at him over the rumble of my engine.

"Shut up, you dipshit. Cut your engine," he barked back. "Look." Jasper pointed up ahead, where the deep forest broke, and a bare field lay.

Perched on the edge of the tree line were a giant moose and a baby calf, grazing in the tall grass. They were far enough away that they weren't startled by our presence, but close enough that I could make out their incredible size and appearance. I'd never seen anything so amazing up close in the wild like that before.

"Ya see that?" whispered Jasper. "It's beautiful. We're gonna appreciate it."

Jasper pulled his helmet off and leaned back, resting against the gear. His eyes were glued to the animals in front of us, and he seemed totally relaxed and in awe.

"You ever see one of these before?" I asked.

"Yep, tons. But they still amaze me, each and every time."

"Huh," I said, staring ahead at the beasts in front of me. They were ugly – big, awkward, funny ears – yet stunning at the same time. For such an enormous creature, they moved with incredible grace. The baby fit snugly underneath the mother's legs, even when standing tall. I wished at that moment I had a camera with me – Esme and Carlisle would have been amazed.

As we sat watching the mother and calf interact, a thick lump was rising in my throat. My mind kept getting pulled back to my mom, and to Esme and Carlisle, and it was making me uncomfortable.

I cleared my throat loudly, hoping that would be enough to spook the animals away, but it wasn't. I attempted a fake coughing attack, but that didn't do it either.

"You alright there, Edward?" Jasper said as he eyed me suspiciously. Just then, the lucky horseshoe that was planted up my ass since birth made its appearance and a large branch snapped loudly in the distance, sending the mother and calf moose trotting away.

"We're almost there. What do you say we open these babies up in this here field?" Jasper suggested. I could've sworn he'd read my mind.

As soon as we burst out into the open field, I pressed my throttle down, and Jasper was right beside me. Air was breezing through my helmet, my shirt was flapping up behind me, and I felt alive. Jasper sped past me, and never one to back down from a challenge, I gunned my throttle down and matched him. I felt weightless, the roar of my quad taking my mind off of everything – my argument with Jake, the lecture from Charlie, my thoughts about back home – and it was liberating. In that moment, I was achieving the escape I'd always been searching for. Problem was, in my searching back home I always came up short.

Much too soon for my liking, we arrived on the other edge of the field, where the fence we were repairing was now in sight. The posts were still standing, but the wire between them was rusted away and broken in several places.

Jasper unloaded all the materials quickly, without saying much. He gave me a brief rundown on how the repairs would go, and started unrolling the large roll of barbed wire.

"So, there's some tension in the air between you and Jake, eh?" he said, as he strapped a tool belt to his waist and threw on a pair of work gloves. He passed me another pair.

"What the fuck is that dickhead's problem, anyway?" I asked. It was as good of a time as any to get some answers.

"Jake?" Jasper asked. "You kinda gotta give the guy a break, man. He's always like that to the new guys. I got here before he did, so we're cool, but he's pretty territorial. He doesn't like people messin' with what's close to him. "

"And I have been?" I barked. "I didn't do shit to him."

"I know that, but Jake sees everyone on the outside as a threat. He and those boys have been through some crazy shit in their lives, Edward. I wouldn't be trusting just anyone if I were them either," he trailed off.

"Crazy shit like what?" I prodded.

"Dude, that's not my story to tell," Jasper said hesitantly as he carefully unrolled another stretch of barbed wire.

"Well, how the hell am I supposed to give the guy a break if I have no idea why he's such a douche bag all the time?" I shot back. Curiosity was killing me.

"Fine. I'll give you the gist," Jasper resigned. "But only the gist – and you didn't hear it from me, alright? Pretend you don't know nothing."

I nodded eagerly at Jasper, while I measured out another length of fence and snipped it with a pair of heavy pliers. Jasper picked a tool out of the utility box that resembled a staple gun, only much bigger. He cranked it open and loaded it up with long, thick staples.

"Jake and Quil are brothers. So are Sam and Embry. The four of them are cousins, and all were raised on the La Push reserve. Jake and Quil came from a good home. They had hardworking, honest parents. Both boys have talked about them a bit in group therapy. They were killed by a drunk driver when Jake was 10, Quil was 6."

"Huh," I nodded. I was a little shocked to learn that we shared some common ground.

We each picked up an end of the measured barbed wire, and dragged it carefully between the fence posts. We were falling into a natural rhythm with one another and didn't need much verbal communication.

"Now, here's where it gets screwed up. Sam and Embry spent most of their early lives in and out of foster care. Their mom's an alcoholic, and who knows where their dad is. If their mom's boyfriend of the week was sober, the kids would get to go home. "

"What does that have to do with Quil and Shithead?" I asked.

"Easy there, Edward. I'm not done, but if you're gonna be a dick, I'll stop," he replied, annoyance clear in his voice. "Hold your end a little higher," he directed, motioning for me to raise my end up.

"Sorry, go on," I mumbled, raising my piece of the fence a few inches on the post.

"Jake and Quil ended up living with Sam and Embry. It's pretty common in First Nations families around here to place kids with family, no matter what. At the time, things were ok in the home, but that didn't last," Jasper paused. He grabbed his staple gun and stapled the wire to the fence post. The loud pop of the staple caused the birds in the trees to squawk and fly away in a panic.

"To cut a long, ugly story short, Jake and Sam wound up in all kinds of trouble. First drinking, then drugs – hard drugs. Nobody around cared enough, or was sober enough, to stop them – they basically raised themselves. Both boys completed full rehab programs before they were sent here. They were both only 16."

"Wow," I said under my breath. Though I still wasn't ok with the way Jake was treating me, I could see a little more clearly why he was being the way he was. I'd been through my share of trouble and stress, but it was nothing like that. I always had somebody there for me.

"What about the younger guys?" I asked. Both Quil and Embry couldn't have been much older than sixteen now themselves.

"After Jake and Sam got clean, they made sure their brothers wouldn't follow the same path. Charlie doesn't take kids younger than sixteen, so they had to wait to get them here," Jasper explained as he drove the last of the staples in to the post. "The younger guys moved here on their birthdays. They've gotten in some minor trouble, but nothing crazy. They really look up to their older brothers."

"That's rough," I mumbled. "Quil seems like a pretty good kid," I said, and I meant it. From what I'd seen so far he had a great sense of humour and worked hard. He also called out Jake when he was being a prick to me on my first night here. "I haven't seen much of Sam and Embry."

"He is a good kid, and no," Jasper chuckled, "you probably won't. They keep to themselves, and spend more of their time working the fields. Embry comes to the main house for studying with Emmett, and they both do the group therapy sessions, but that's about it. They spend most of their time in their cottage."

"Cottage?" I asked. I hadn't noticed any cottages, but I hadn't had a chance to do any exploring.

"Yeah. That's where the other guys all live – there are four scattered around the property. Bella's got one, and each set of brothers have one."

"What about Emmett and Rosalie?"

Jasper laughed. "They've got a small house up the road. You passed it on the way in here. They need some space, ya know? Soon-to- be-newlyweds and all."

"How come you're still in the main house, then? You've been here longer than Jake, right?" I asked. "Don't you want some space?" It didn't really seem fair that Jasper was stuck in the main house if he was the longest standing resident.

"I've only got a couple months on the others, but it doesn't matter. I choose to be there. Charlie's offered me the other place plenty of times. I'm not ready yet."

"Ready for what?" I asked. Why anyone wouldn't want the privacy and peace was beyond me.

"The freedom. There's a lot about me you don't know, Edward," he said with a deep sigh, "but I'll fill you in. Let's pick up here and head west. We'll take a break up ahead."

We drove down what Jasper called a cutline, to the next piece of fencing that needed repair. My thoughts were a jumbled mess. My mind wandered to what it would have been like to be Jake and Quil, grieving and alone. I had grieved, but it was never alone.

I quickly replaced that train of thought with theories on Jasper and why he was here. He was a tough guy to read – laid back and relaxed, yet you could tell by his quick wit and grin that he had a mischievous streak.

We parked our quads in a shady spot close to the damaged fence. Jasper pulled his helmet off and flopped down in the grass.

"Bring that cooler over, Edward. Might as well get comfy, too," Jasper said. I pulled some leftover sandwiches and apples from the cooler and tossed him one of each, along with a bottle of water.

"So, what do you know about mental illness, Edward?" Jasper asked me, his tone light.

"Not a hell of a lot." I replied. What I did know was that Mike and a bunch of the guys from home would go to the doctor at the free clinic, complain a bunch and get legally hooked up with a prescription they'd illegally sell. None of it was legit, and I stayed as far out of it as I could.

"Well, I've got one. I'm bipolar. High highs, low lows. I take medication, do therapy. There are things I do to feel better – hard work seems to help me keep balanced," he replied while picking the sticker off his apple with his fingernail. He didn't seem embarrassed or nervous sharing at all.

"What brought you here, though?" I asked.

"My parents never believed there was anything wrong with me. They thought God could cure me, that I didn't pray enough. I lived untreated for years – it started when I was just a kid. I'd lash out at people, or lock myself in my room for days." He stopped to take a long swig out of his water bottle.

"It all got ugly when I turned sixteen. I drank, a lot. It made me numb." He paused.

"So did I," I replied softly.

Jasper chuckled to himself and shook his head softly. "See, Edward. That's where I think we're different. I don't know your story, but I'm willing to bet you probably didn't steal a car while drunk off your face, crash into a minivan and cripple a single father of three for life, did you?"

"Um, no," I stammered, completely at a loss for words.

"After the accident, I went to juvie. In juvie, I attempted suicide three times. They finally transferred me to a pysch ward in the city. Got me a diagnosis and a treatment plan. I was offered the chance to come up here and live with Charlie. Best opportunity I've ever had," he said, letting out a deep breath.

"But you're good now?" I asked. Jasper just seemed so normal. I would have never known if he hadn't have said anything.

"Today? Lately? Yes. But I'll struggle with this every day of my life, Edward. I have ways I cope. Familiarity helps. But it will never just go away."

I just nodded in response. If Carlisle were here, he'd have told me to "never judge a book by its cover." I was stunned by Jasper's admissions, but glad that things were improving for him. I couldn't imagine the guilt he must have had after his accident, and the turmoil he must have suffered through. My problems seemed so silly in comparison.

"Why don't we get finished up here, Edward. Daylight's wasting, and we've got a bonfire tonight," Jasper said, he voice sounding lighter than it had been.

"Bonfire?" I asked.

"Yeah, they're awesome. We eat outside, tell stories and stuff. Charlie usually joins us," he explained excitedly. "Maybe if you're lucky, you can sit beside Bella."

"Kiss my ass," I replied, as I threw my apple core at him. He laughed to himself as he dodged out of the way.

I hopped up and grabbed the roll of barbed wire. After the emotionally heavy confessions of the afternoon, I was looking forward to something fun. I didn't want to waste too much time, as we had a long way to ride back to the house.

Once Jasper mentioned her, my thoughts remained stuck on Bella. I found myself wondering what she was up to, and why she too was here. I knew she was Charlie's daughter, but what she was sticking around this place for was a mystery to me. I resolved that maybe, if we made it back in time, I would grab a spot beside her. I was on a roll in my discoveries, and I wasn't about to stop short. I was nervous though, as it would only be a matter of time until someone asked more about me.

**Thanks again for reading! As always, I love to hear your thoughts! xoxo**


	7. Chapter 7

**AN Big thanks, as always, to my awesome beta Robzbeanie – she is wonderful – and to my also awesome prereader CShepherd91. S. Meyer owns Twilight. I only wish I did. =D**

The Ranch

Chapter 7

Jasper and I pulled up to the house just as the sun was beginning to dip below the valley wall. We had worked quickly to repair the last of the fence, making small talk with one another. We talked movies, music, sports – lighter stuff.

Heading up to the house you could smell the fire pit blazing. Smoke billowed up into the sky in a swirly zigzag pattern with the light breeze. Laughter and chatter filled the air, and it sounded like someone was strumming a guitar.

As we rounded the house, we were greeted with "heys" from Quil and Sam, who were hanging out away from the rest of the group. Everyone was either sitting around the campfire or around the two giant picnic tables that were pulled up just off to the left of the fire. I was right about the guitar – Embry was sitting on a log casually plucking at the strings.

Bella got up from her spot next to Jake and made her way over to me and Jasper. "You guys hungry?" she asked. She seemed relaxed, happy. The fire had turned her cheeks bright pink. "We're having foil packs!" she announced with a big grin directed at Jasper.

"Bella, baby – you read my mind," Jasper chuckled, as he headed towards the various bowls filled with ingredients spread out on the furthest picnic table.

"What's a foil pack?" I asked.

"It's amazing. Come on, I'll show you," Bella said as she grabbed me by the wrist. Her fingers felt soft and delicate on my skin, her hands warm from the fire.

Spread out on the picnic table was an entire assortment of food – bowls filled with chicken, ground beef and ham, chopped onions, peppers, tomatoes, thinly sliced carrots and potatoes. Large pre-cut sheets of tinfoil were stacked on the end of the table next to a bowl of butter complete with a basting brush. I had no clue what to do with all of it.

"So – here's what ya do," Bella said, grabbing us each a sheet of foil. She spread her sheet with butter and handed me the brush to do the same.

"Now you fill 'er up with whatever you want. Don't be a pig though – fill it too full and it won't seal to cook. You can make more," she teased.

I nodded at Bella and filled my foil sheet with an assortment of meat and veggies, following along behind her. She stopped short at the seasonings, and even though I could have avoided it, I purposely bumped right into her back.

"Watch it!" she squeaked as she stumbled forward half a step. The grin on her face told me she wasn't nearly as ticked off with me as she was during the salad incident.

"Sorry, I didn't see you there," I said back in a serious voice. I purposely closed in on her, right in her personal space, and stood close against her back.

"You're an idiot," she laughed. "Now get away from me and I'll show you how to cook that thing."

As Bella set to work folding our packets up into neat little parcels, my mind wandered away and I took a closer look at everyone gathered around. Emmett and Rosalie were huddled close together, knees touching, his arm around her shoulders, a blanket over both of them. Jake was staring at something in the fire and cracking his knuckles. Sam and Quil had gathered closer, and Jasper was poking at something on the edge of the fire pit – I assumed it was his dinner. Embry had abandoned his guitar, and instead was loading a long metal stick with marshmallows. Charlie was nowhere to be seen.

"Earth to Edward!" Bella said as she poked me in the ribs. "You didn't catch how to do any of that, did you? You're so on your own next time," she joked.

"Oh sorry, thanks," I mumbled. "What do we do now?"

"We stick 'em in the fire – close to the coals and away from any flames."

"Alright. Come sit with me?" I asked, grabbing my perfectly folded packet off the table. I was hoping to find out some more about her. She was hot, witty – I wanted more time with her.

"Um, I can't. I'd better go sit with Jake," she said hesitantly, "but tomorrow you're grooming with me, right?"

"I don't know, am I?" I asked. I was disappointed, but if I got some real one on one time, that would be even better.

"Check your schedule, bonehead," she teased. "Yes, you're with me. You ever been around horses before?" she asked as we made our way over to the fire pit.

"No, never," I replied. Truthfully, they always kind of intimidated me. I'd never had the opportunity, nor did I want it. I never understood how people could trust a giant animal like that, or figure out what it was thinking.

"Well, tomorrow will be fun then. We'll catch up later, 'kay?" She smiled at me, and made her way around the large fire pit.

I tossed my packet into the coals and plopped down on a log next to Jasper. Across the fire Jake had shrugged his jacket off and placed it around Bella's shoulders.

"You like her," Jasper said in a hushed voice as he elbowed me in the side. "I was just bugging you out in the field. But I know it now. You like her."

"What the hell are you talking about?" I said. Yeah, I thought she was hot, but I wasn't panting over her or anything.

"I just know these things. You like her. And that's funny," Jasper chuckled to himself.

"So what if I did like her? And why the hell is that funny?" I responded, slightly annoyed.

"Just be careful, man. Remember what you're here for, who you're here with. I'm not saying anything more – just be careful."

"Whatever, dude," I replied as I got up to flip my packet in the fire. I'd seen Bella do the same moments before.

"So, Eddie–" Jake's deep voice carried from across the fire. I stirred the coals around my packet with the marshmallow stick. "Why don't you tell us a little about yourself?" he sneered. Everyone around the fire quieted down, with the exception of Emmett and Rosalie who seemed off in their own little world.

"It's Edward. What do you wanna know?" I replied. I wasn't going to cave, but I wasn't going to be a complete dick either.

"What did a city boy like you do to get your ass sent up here?" he snickered. "Steal a Ferrari?" A couple of the guys gave a little chuckle.

"No, but I got in some shit. My aunt and uncle thought this place would help straighten me out," I answered. He didn't need to know specifics.

"How 'bout a girlfriend? You got a chick or two waiting for you back home?"

"No girlfriend," I said curtly.

"Aww, ok then. You're a virgin," he said in a sickeningly sweet voice. Bella quickly smacked him in the thigh.

My grip tightened on the fire stick I was holding, and I used all my strength not to walk around that fire and deck him.

"Why, Jake?" Quil piped up from his spot. "You interested?" The group all burst out laughing, with the exception of Jake of course. He had a deep scowl on his face, and didn't look even a little amused.

"What's the commotion?" Charlie announced, his sudden appearance startling us all. Charlie's arrival changed the tone around the fire almost instantly. I shot Jake a glare, but nothing more was said. Everyone went back to visiting amongst themselves.

Jasper and I filled Charlie in on the fence repairs while stuffing our faces full of our foil-wrapped dinners. He was impressed that we completed as much as we did. While Jasper and Charlie went on to discuss rearranging cattle, my mind wandered back to Bella's plans for me the next day. Jasper's revelations of the evening worried me. If he already thought I liked Bella, what were the others thinking?

I didn't not like Bella. I was clearly drawn to her from the moment I arrived here and smashed into her and that damn bowl of salad, but I didn't think I was being obvious about it either. The problem lay in the fact that I didn't know if I did like her, and why I did if I did. I resolved to myself that the next day, I'd get my thoughts in order.

xoxoxox

"Tell me about your life back home, Edward, " Rosalie said from behind her small but crowded desk in her office, just off of the main entryway. She twirled a pen around her fingers and balanced a pad of paper on top of her crossed legs. Her hot legs, might I add. A vision of Rosalie leaping up, busting open her white buttoned down blouse, and freeing her hair from its ponytail flashed through my mind in slow motion, but was quickly replaced with a vision of Emmett beating me to a bloody pulp.

The night before, we'd finished up eating pretty quickly, and then basically retired to bed. I had been up since the crack of dawn cleaning the chicken coop, and after all the fresh air, I was exhausted. However, when I finally lay down, I tossed and turned for a long time.

I retraced my steps over and over leaving the chicken coop, and was certain that the latch was closed. I thought back to what Jasper told me about the other guys' histories, not to mention his own. I thought about Jake, and how he'd been nothing but a dick to me. I thought about spending time with Bella the next day, and having to get close to a horse to do so. Lastly, I thought about the big red letters on my calendar that spelled out the word "Therapy" first thing in the morning. Needless to say, it was a restless night.

"What do you want to know?" I asked. After I moved in with Esme and Carlisle, they had me see a therapist once a week. It was a total joke. I quickly learned, at age eleven, that if I talked for a few moments about my feelings, I'd be allowed to color for the rest of the session. Something told me I couldn't play that card anymore.

"Well, let's start with your friends," she said calmly. "Tell me a bit about them."

"There isn't much to tell," I snorted.

"No?" she questioned, her voice staying surprisingly even toned. "It's my understanding that you and your friends got into a fair amount of trouble. Would you say that's correct?"

"Yeah. Nothing big though," I defended.

"But big enough that you got sent here." She stared at me while she chewed on the end of her pen. Naturally, my thoughts drifted to her lips wrapping around it, but I quickly pulled them back.

"I guess, yeah. We were just messing around though. Being kids. It never seemed like a big deal at the time," I shrugged.

Rosalie nodded, scribbling notes on her pad of paper.

"I always kind of wondered what would be the last straw. I didn't see this coming though," I said.

"After your mother died and you went to live with Esme and Carlisle, they started caring for you as if you were their own, correct?" Rose asked. I just nodded in reply.

"Now, you know that I spoke to Esme before you arrived, right? We talked a bit about your situation. You gave your consent for that with no problems?"

"Yeah," I answered, "I wasn't gonna fight with them anymore."

Rose started scribbling madly, nodding her head in time with the movements of her pen.

"I think it's fair to say that Esme and Carlisle just want what's best for you, don't you think?" Rosalie asked, her pen never leaving her paper.

"I guess," I replied. This conversation was quickly rolling into uncomfortable territory.

"What do you want for yourself then, Edward?" Rosalie asked, finally dropping the pen in her lap.

"I, um, I don't know." That question was starting to grate on me. I really just wanted to be left alone.

"Well, I'll tell you what. I've got some homework for you." She stood from her chair and opened up her filing cabinet, her skirt bunching slightly in the back, revealing a little more of her thighs. I quickly turned my eyes to the floor after catching one last glimpse.

"Take this journal." She handed me a coil bound notebook with a dark blue cover. "Every few days, I'll get you to write about something in particular. Don't wait for me though – if there is something you want to get out, put it in here."

I flipped the pages casually through my fingers. I'd never written in a journal before. It seemed girly. I could only imagine the jabs I'd get from the guys back home if they heard I was keeping a diary.

"So, your first assignment?" she said with a grin, "is to write down something you've done that you're proud of. Not too bad, eh?"

"No, I guess not," I replied.

"Secondly – I want you to look up the word "apathy." Write down the definition, and tell me your thoughts on that."

I scrunched my nose up and shook my head at her. I had a vague idea what apathy was, but definitely wasn't certain.

"Is there a problem?" she said, bringing back that sweet tone she had used on me earlier.

"No," I replied hesitantly. " I just don't know what you're getting at."

"You will," she smirked. "Bring the journal to the next group therapy session. I'm going to ask you to share something – you can decide what, but it has to be something, ok?"

"Ok," I replied, still confused.

"I don't want to keep Bella waiting. I'll let you go early today, alright?" I stood up to leave her office, journal in hand.

"Edward – just know that the more effort you put into all this, the more you'll get back, alright?" Rosalie said as I reached the doorway.

"I know," I sighed, looking back at her over my shoulder. "I'll try."

xoxoxoxoxo

I quickly grabbed a snack in the kitchen – a plate of gigantic warm muffins and a pitcher of orange juice was waiting on the counter – and made my way out to the barn.

I was both excited and nervous to meet up with Bella. There was a slight breeze in the air, for which I was incredibly grateful. I was sweating, and starting to stink. I hoped the smell of the horse in the barn would cover it up and that Bella wouldn't notice.

The large double doors on the front of the barn were wide open. Just inside I noticed Bella bent down slightly beside a stunning white horse. With one hand she was supporting the horse's foot, and with the other she was picking at the horse's hoof with some sort of tool.

Not wanting to startle her – or frighten the horse – I paused in the doorway for a moment to watch her. She was talking in a soft voice to the animal while she worked. I chuckled to myself at her outfit – black rubber boots, jeans with the knees blown out, a black tank top covered up by an unbuttoned, worn out plaid shirt she probably stole from Charlie. The girls back home – and most of the guys, for that matter – wouldn't have been caught dead without their pricey labels. This was refreshing.

Just as Bella gently set the horse's foot down, she looked up and caught my eye.

"Edward! Geez! How long have you been standing there?" she laughed. I was glad she wasn't pissed at me for creeping.

"Just a minute," I said sheepishly. "I didn't want to scare it," I replied, pointing casually to the horse.

Bella let out a deep chuckle.

"Oh my God. 'It'–" she giggled, "is named Eclipse, and you've got nothing to worry about." She stroked the horse's thick neck with her palm.

"Sorry," I mumbled, as I hesitantly made my way closer.

"We're gonna give her a good brushing – I've already gone over her to get most of the dirt and stuff off." She paused for a minute and looked me over. "You a little nervous or something?"

"Um, yeah. You could say that."

"Well, you have nothing to worry about. She's really friendly. Grab that brush there?" Bella gestured towards a soft bristle brush on the nearby bench.

I quickly scooped the brush off the table, and walked closer to Bella and Eclipse. Just as I reached my hand out to Bella, the horse left out a loud sneezing sound – scaring the shit out of me and sending me jumping backwards. The brush hit the floor, and Bella doubled over in laughter. I felt my manhood floating away by the second.

"You're really afraid," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "Just relax. She can sense your tension. Come stand beside me."

I moved right next to Bella and tucked my hands in my pockets. I was still sweating bullets – more so now – but the smell of Eclipse was in fact heavy in the air.

Before I could think my thoughts through, I found words spilling out of my mouth. "Nice boots," I said, immediately regretting it. I was known to get snarky under stress and pressure.

"They're steel-toed, ass. Watch yourself," Bella replied with a smirk. I was glad she didn't take offense to my jab. "Come get your hands on her."

Bella ran her hands down the horse's neck and back, stopping every so often to give a gentle pat. She murmured and cooed at her, the same way you'd soothe a child. She seemed so comfortable – relaxed but in control.

I hesitantly placed my hands on Eclipse, mimicking Bella's movements. The tight, firm muscles beneath her skin flexed with the small movements of her head and legs.

"Better, right?" Bella said. I noticed how much I'd relaxed. The tension in my shoulders was gone. I wouldn't have said I was overly comfortable, but I wasn't as jumpy. Bella picked up the brush from the barn floor.

"Watch me, and then you can try it, ok?"

"Ok," I agreed. Bella moved the brush in long, flowing strokes. "You always been doing this?" I asked.

"Um, yeah. Pretty much. My dad retired from the RCMP after he and my mom got divorced. He took over this place then – I was just a baby. I've been around the horses my whole life."

"You stayed with him?" I asked, closely studying her brush strokes. If she was going to make me try the brush, I wanted to be sure I did it right.

"I was back and forth. My mom hated it here – the winters were too cold, she thought we were too isolated. She moved down to Phoenix, met a guy. I lived there for a bit, but have been here since I was thirteen."

"And your dad let you live with a bunch of screwed-up teenage boys?" I said, again questioning my lack of verbal filter.

"Not exactly," she chuckled. "We used to live in what is now Emmett and Rose's house, just off the property. It wasn't until I got back from college that I moved into a cabin here. My dad's in the main house now, but he had staff on site before – he likes it better being close to the new guys though."

"And Jasper," I added.

"Yeah, and Jasper." Bella carefully walked around the front of Eclipse, and started brushing her other side. The horse's tail swished back and forth at a steady pace.

"So why are you still here now?" I asked. I figured that at best, I'd learn a little more about her and at worst she'd tell me to back off.

"Well–" she paused, taking a deep breath, "I went to the city and enrolled in school, but it didn't go so well. It's kind of a long story. Charlie's had some health issues, too – I'm taking the year to give him a hand, get things sorted out, then I'm heading back."

"Huh. What did you take?"

"Animal Health Tech," she replied softly. She looked lost in thought for a moment. "But enough about me – let's get you doing this. Here," she said as she thrust the brush at me.

I grabbed the brush from Bella and carefully placed it at the base of Eclipse's neck. My hand was shaking slightly – I was nervous, but at this point it was less about the horse and more about looking like an idiot in front of Bella.

"Push just a little harder. She likes firm strokes," Bella directed, watching me closely. I quickly bit my tongue – "That's what she said" resting on the tip – grateful that my filter decided to finally show up.

"Like this?" I pushed a little firmer.

"I'll show you," Bella said. I passed the brush in her direction, but instead of taking it, she surprised the shit out of me by grasping my hand, brush and all. She placed it up against the horse's side, and moved our hands in smooth, fluid motions.

"Like this."

Bella stepped closer, fitting right beneath my chin. She looked up at me over her shoulder, her bottom lip pressed firmly beneath her teeth, her lips curled up in a smile at the corners. Her eyes met mine, and as ridiculous as it sounds, in that moment, nothing else around me mattered.

It was me, her, her delicate hand on mine, and it was a moment. A made-for-TV moment. Something you'd see in a movie, read about in a book. This was real, and corny as hell, but it was happening.

It felt like minutes, but it was more likely seconds. We both realized at the same time that our hands had stopped moving. We were frozen still. The sound of the horse snorting snapped me out of my daze, and Bella quickly drew her hand back. She moved away swiftly, busying herself with picking up the brushes and tools she had laid out around us.

"Are we done?" I asked, at a loss for any better words.

"Yeah," she said softly, her back to me, "I mean, um, yeah. I'll finish up."

The tension in the air was thick. You could have bottled the atmosphere and called it awkward. I was quickly trying to backpedal, get us back to where we were moments before, but I was coming up empty.

"Ok, I'll go find Jasper," I replied, though I had no plans with him; it seemed like an easy out. "Um, Bella?"

"Mhm?" she murmured.

"When can we do this again?" I was stretching out a bit, hoping to hell that she wouldn't shoot me right down.

"Oh, um. Soon?" she replied. "If you liked it, I'll tell Charlie? He can give you more horse time, or something?" Everything she said sounded like a question. Her cheeks were getting rosy.

"That would be awesome. I'll uh – I'll see you later."

I slowly made my way back to the main house. Bella and I had just experienced a moment that would rival that scene from that "Ghost" movie Esme made me watch three times, and I was confused.

"Edward!" Charlie's booming voice snapped me out of my thoughts. I probably looked like I'd been caught with my pants down, but I was freaked out. Charlie was walking quickly towards me, his expression stern. All I could think was, "I didn't do anything!"

"Yes, Sir?" I answered nervously.

"The guys are making a trip to town for some supplies. You've been working pretty hard. You want to go?"

Just like that, I'd found my distraction.

**Thanks again for reading and reviewing, guys! I love hearing your thoughts. Next chapter will be coming in a week or two max. xoxo**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N Major thanks, as always, to my beta Robzbeanie and my prereader CShepherd91. You guys are awesome! xoxo**

The Ranch

Chapter 8

"Turn that shit down!" Jake hollered out from the back seat of Emmett's truck. Emmett's country playlist was definitely not a hit amongst the other guys.

"You're just jealous," Emmett grinned from the driver's seat. "Rosie thinks _my_ tractor's sexy." A collaborative groan filled the cab.

Winding gravel roads lined with thick brush and trees made up most of the scenery on the way in to town. I realized that if I had wanted to get the hell out of this place, I wouldn't have even known how. Falling asleep on the way here probably wasn't the smartest idea. My survival skills and instincts were evidently subpar.

Half an hour later, we were approaching a deep valley. The town of Swan Crossing was spread out on the banks of a wide, meandering river.

"Hey –" Jasper whispered at me, bumping my knees with his. He and I were crammed in the front seat with Emmett. Jake made a point of declaring, repeatedly, that I was riding "bitch" – the seat in the front middle. Jasper quickly shut him up by calling "shotgun," forcing Jake, Quil and Sam to eat their knees in the back seat.

"Yeah?" I whispered back.

"How was Bella?"

"Um, good?"

"And?" he pressed for more.

"And what?"

"You know –"

"Shut up!" I shot back at him in a harsh whisper. This was neither the time nor the place to be sharing my "feelings" on Bella – whatever they were.

"Here's the plan," Emmett announced. "First stop, UFA for feed and lumber. Then we'll stop by the school quick – I have some paperwork to get filled out with Quil. Then lunch, then home. Got it?"

We all nodded.

"I don't want to have to say this, but you guys know I do. Don't screw this up, ok?" Emmett said, looking over his shoulder in Quil's direction. "The community dance is coming up – if you all wanna be able to go, don't let me down."

We pulled up in front of a huge bright orange building. Pallets of wood and large bags were stacked all along the walls. A large trailer full of cattle was parked haphazardly in the middle of the parking lot. Old, weathered men in cowboy hats were hanging around the entrance, coffee mugs and catalogues in hand. It looked like a popular place to be.

Jasper and I made our way through the crowd of cowboys and headed to the front desk. Behind the counter a very bored-looking woman sat behind a propped up Cosmo magazine, loudly smacking and popping her gum. Her nametag read 'Vicki,' and was decorated with sparkly heart stickers.

"Hey Vick!" Jasper called out at her. She didn't look up from her magazine. Instead she held up a finger, motioning for us to wait. Her lips started moving, reciting whatever it was she was reading quietly aloud.

"Oh my God, sorry!" she said, finally bringing her eyes to Jasper. "Didn't want to lose my spot!" she giggled.

"It's cool. We're here for Charlie's order?" Jasper said.

"Aw, hunny, and I just thought you were here for me!" She gave Jasper a wink. I guessed she was probably thirty, but desperately hanging on to her youth. He grinned at her, looking totally uncomfortable. "Who's your friend?" she asked, looking me up and down, twirling a bright red curl around her finger.

"This is Edward. He's new," Jasper answered, never meeting her eyes, his hands stuffed deep in his pockets.

"Well, nice to meet you, Edward. Come on out back. I'll show you guys what's yours."

"So, Jasper," I said, bending down to load the last of the feed bags in the back of the truck. "You bangin' 'Vick'? She's kinda hot, for a cougar," I snorted.

I was knocked right off balance by a bag of feed hitting me square in the ass.

"You're a dick," he replied. "And no, I'm not 'banging' her. I've got my eye on someone else."

"And who would that be?" I asked.

"If you hurry up and load this shit, you might just get to meet her."

Emmett's beast of a truck caught quite a few second glances from the kids standing around outside of the high school. Quil had been begging Emmett to turn down the music, saying "Corb Lund was embarrassing" and "Nobody likes Brooks and Dunn anymore." Emmett just played deaf and laughed at his efforts.

"Quil and I gotta run in and take care of a few things at the office. You guys chill here. We'll be quick, ok?" Emmett instructed.

"Hurry up, man. I'm starving," Jasper said. He looked impatient – knees bouncing, wringing his fingers.

"Dude, she'll still be there," Quil said with a grin while climbing out of the truck.

"That's not what – whatever," Jasper shot back, rubbing his hands across his face.

The rest of us stayed quiet after Emmett and Quil took off. Both Jasper and Sam were staring out the windows, watching the kids pass by, and yet not looking at anything or anyone in particular. Jake had his iPod volume maxed, his head leaned back against the glass, his eyes closed.

"Jake – look!" Sam yelled, bolting upright in his seat. Jake ripped his headphones out and leaned over Sam to take a closer look out the window.

"Holy shit. He's here!" he replied, surprised.

"Who?" Jasper asked.

"Seth – our cousin. He wasn't showing up," Sam replied quietly. "The judge told him if he didn't start attending, he'd be moved."

"What the fuck are you waiting for, " Jake said, slapping Sam in the side. "Let's go!"

The two of them climbed out of the truck and jogged over to Seth, who was standing across the road from the parking lot puffing on a cigarette. Lots of "man hugs" and handshakes were exchanged. Seth was nodding, and Sam was talking – a stern, but caring expression on his face.

From the opposite direction, Emmett and Quil made their way back to the truck. Yet another round of handshakes, back slaps and half-hugs were exchanged, and just before turning to leave, Jake took his iPod from his pocket and slapped it in Seth's hand.

Emmett parked the truck just down the street from the diner. Jasper, myself and the rest of the guys all piled out of the truck quickly – the lure of greasy food pushing us along. The food at The Ranch was incredible – everything was home cooked and fresh, so I couldn't complain, but once in a while a guy needs his burger fix.

Jake lingered back from us, telling Emmett that he had to make a quick pit stop at the gas station, and to order him a cheeseburger meal with a Coke.

As we got closer to the diner, I was drawn to a group of kids – late teens, by the looks of them – hanging around the side of the building. They were laughing and yelling at one another. Some were smoking, but all were basically doing a hell of a lot of nothing. The scene was incredibly familiar. Back home, that would have been me.

The inside of the diner was nothing special – but it felt cosy, homey. The tables were covered with red and white checked table cloths, and the windows in the log walls were framed in the same print. The air smelled like onions, bacon, coffee and grease.

We seated ourselves at a long table close to the windows. From my seat, I could once again see the group of kids lingering around outside. Trying to divert my attention from the group, I buried myself in the laminated menu that was already resting atop the table. My efforts were wasted though when I caught a glimpse of bright red – the same bright red Jake was wearing – appear in the group.

I focused my eyes on him. The other guys were deep in their menus, so I kept quiet. Jake was a big guy, and not hard to pick out of the crowd.

I watched as Jake and another guy – shorter, bad acne, skinny with longer blond hair – stepped away from the group a few feet. Their heads were close together, Jake nodding as the guy was talking. They gave each other a firm, long handshake before Jake turned and made his way towards the entrance.

"Whatcha looking at?" Jasper, who was seated beside me, asked.

"Nothing," I replied quietly, "Just some people out there." Quil took a look from across the table and nodded, quickly going back to his menu.

"Oh. Yeah, that's James and his buddies. He's a dick," Jasper said, disgust weighty in his voice. At that moment, Jake slid into the empty chair. I wondered what he was doing outside, but quickly put my curiosity aside.

"So what'll it be, boys?"

Standing at the end of our table, notepad in hand, was a petite brunette. She was cute – wide green eyes, dimples, just enough cleavage bared to tease but not flaunt. Her plastic name tag read 'Alice.'

I looked over to Jasper, catching his attention, and nodded towards the girl. He gave me a harsh scowl back, which immediately told me that she was the one.

"Cheeseburger, and fries for me," I ordered. The rest of the guys placed their orders, leaving Jasper last.

"I um, I uh –" he stammered, his ears and cheeks turning bright red.

"Sorry, we don't have any of that," Alice giggled. "But we do have a new mushroom burger. You liked what I suggested last time, right?" she smiled a sweet smile at Jasper.

"Yeah," he replied, his face completely serious as he looked right up at her. "That'll be good."

"Ok." She smiled another big grin at the rest of us. "I'll be back with your pop in just a minute!"

While we were waiting for our food, Emmett and Sam were deep in a discussion about what type of tires would be a better purchase. Jake had wandered off to an arcade machine in the back corner and Quil followed close behind.

"So that's her," Jasper said quietly, taking a sip of his Coke.

"Who?"

"Geez, pay attention. Alice. The only girl out there for me," he replied wistfully.

"Why don't you go talk to her?" I asked. He seemed so nervous when she was taking our order, and he'd barely even looked up at her since. I could see her behind the front counter, rapidly texting on her cell phone. If he felt so strongly about her, surely he could start with a decent conversation.

"Well," he said with a deep sigh, "I've got my reasons."

"What? You shy or something?"

"No, well, yeah. But that's not it," he said, even quieter then he was before.

"Then what is it?" I asked. Jasper swallowed hard and cracked his knuckles.

"You want to know why, Edward?" he said, locking eyes with me. He looked pained – sad, but angry. I nodded.

"It's because I'm shy, and I mumble. It's because I have no way to take her anywhere even if I did ask her on a date. It's because I'm not ready. But most importantly, Edward? It's because I'm not good enough for her yet."

We all ate in relative silence, everyone hunched over their plates. About halfway through our meal, Quil got up saying he had a gut ache and headed for the bathroom. Alice stopped by our table multiple times to check on things or bring refills – all without another word from Jasper.

"Quil's been gone awhile. Who wants to check on him?" Emmett asked. "My poutine's getting cold."

"I'll go," I offered. I was pretty well finished with my meal and I liked Quil, liked his company. I could help the kid out if he wasn't feeling well. I didn't see myself getting any closer to Jake while I was here, and Sam and Embry just kept to themselves. It would be nice to have someone else to bullshit with.

I followed the signs to the bathroom down a narrow hallway. I opened the bathroom door, expecting to find Quil, but the whole place was empty. I called out his name and got no response.

I headed out of the washroom, and started making my way back to the table to let the other guys know he was gone. Just as I rounded the corner, out of the corner of my eye in the window, I caught a glimpse of the hood on Quil's coat. What the heck he was doing outside was beyond me. I figured that he was probably just after fresh air, but knew that he should have told someone if he was leaving.

Alice was walking by with a full drink tray. Rather than get the other guys all concerned over nothing, I stopped her and asked if there was another exit. She directed me through the back door.

I slowed down as I crept closer to the corner of the restaurant. I could hear voices, but couldn't quite make out what they were saying. As I snuck a little closer I could hear Quil.

"Hurry the fuck up, man. Is it lit?" Quil asked. "If I get busted because of your slow ass, I'm done with you."

"I'm trying. Here," an unfamiliar voice said. I peered around the corner. Quil had his back to me, and was standing face to face with the guy Jasper identified to me as James. The smell of weed was heavy in the air.

"Quick man, take your hit. I've gotta get in there," Quil said, sounding urgent.

"Quil. What the fuck?" I yelled out. James quickly thrust the joint and lighter at Quil, turned around and took off. Quil whipped around to face me and stared like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Edward, man. Chill," Quil said hesitantly. "It's not what you think."

"I'm not an idiot," I replied. "What the hell are you doing? Emmett's gonna kick your ass. Holy fuck, Charlie's gonna –"

"Look, man. Please," Quil interrupted, his voice tense. "Just don't say anything. Stand out here with me for a few minutes. I'll deal with it, ok?"

"No way, dude. This shit ain't right. How old are you? Sixteen?" I said, turning to make my way back in to find Emmett.

"Look, just, please," Quil begged. "Do you at least have a piece of gum?"

"Ugh, fine," I said. I stopped and started digging in my pockets. The sound of gravel crunching behind me caused my stomach to drop. I was no fool. This looked awful.

"You stupid piece of shit."

To add insult to injury, it was Jake, and he was angry. "Quil, if you don't get your stupid ass in that truck, I'll put you there and it won't be pretty," he sneered. Quil stood frozen to the ground, his eyes low.

"Go!" Jake yelled. "And you –" he grabbed me by the shoulder, forcefully spinning me around. "He's sixteen. You've got some kind of –"

"No!" I shouted back at him. "I know this looks bad, but I found him here with that James guy – I swear."

"Look," he said, his face inches from mine. "I've got Quil to deal with, but this isn't the end of this." He gave me another shove to the shoulder and stomped off to the parking lot.

The ride home was uncomfortable at best. Jake and Emmett had spent a good fifteen minutes outside of the diner hashing things over while the rest of us, Quil included, sat in the truck. Emmett had spent an additional ten minutes on the phone with Charlie.

Jake looked like he was ready to snap. He was pacing back and forth in front of the truck, kicking at the air, clenching and unclenching his fists.

"Edward, man," Quil said quietly. "I'm sorry. I'll make sure you don't catch shit for this." I just nodded at him from the back seat.

After Emmett hung up his phone, he hopped into his truck. As soon as he started it, the cheerful country tunes we'd been listening to on the way out started blasting from the speakers. Emmett quickly put an end to that, popping the CD right out of its player.

"Charlie's going to be waiting for you, Quil. What the hell were you thinking?" Emmett asked. He looked so disappointed. The jovial fun guy was gone.

"I don't know, Em. I'm sorry," Quil softly replied. Those words were the last ones spoken on our trip.

We pulled up to the main house, and everyone unloaded from the truck the quickest they had all day. We were all feeling tense and uncomfortable. Charlie was already waiting on the front porch.

"You," he said, pointing directly at Quil. "My office, now!" Quil just nodded in response, taking the stairs two at a time.

"Jake," Charlie called out a little softer. "You stay close. The rest of you follow Emmett – those supplies aren't going to unload themselves."

I started heading back to the truck, grateful that I hadn't been called out, when Charlie stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Edward –" he said. "Five o'clock. My office. Got it?" He didn't wait for my reply, and instead stomped off into the main house, slamming the heavy wooden door behind him.

**Thanks so much for reading – I love hearing your thoughts...or even just a "hello!" I recently wrote a one shot for fun called Palmistry. Check it out! =) Thanks again! xoxo EK**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N Thanks to my wonderful beta, Robzbeanie. 24 hours? You're amazing! Also big thanks to my lovely prereader, CShepherd91. xoxo**

The Ranch

Chapter Nine

After Charlie and Quil disappeared inside, Jasper and I followed Emmett's truck around to an older barn used for storage. We created an assembly line – Emmett in the truck bed, me in the middle and Jasper on the end stacking the feed bags into piles. The bags were awkward and heavy – after only a few minutes of tossing them along, my arms and back were on fire and I was covered in sweat and dust. Looking up at Emmett, he barely seemed phased. Neither did Jasper. Not wanting to be seen as a pussy, I wiped my forehead on my sleeve every few minutes and kept my mouth shut.

"What's gonna happen to Quil?" I grunted up at Emmett between bags.

"Well, he'll lose some privileges. Charlie will be watching him closely." Emmett groaned as he tossed the last sack in my direction. "This is his last warning – if he screws up again he'll be moving back to the main house with you guys."

"You think Jake's in there throwing me under the bus?" I asked. I had a feeling he would be. He was probably telling Charlie I was holding the lighter up to Quil's joint, too.

"I don't know, Edward. Put yourself in his shoes for a minute," Emmett said as he hopped off the truck. "What if it was your younger brother? Someone you took on a lot of responsibility for?"

"I never had any siblings. I don't know what that would be like," I said, thinking carefully for a minute. Maybe that was part of my issue. I only really ever had to care for and about myself. I made a mental note to put that in my journal, and started brushing the dust off my shirt and jeans.

"What the hell happened?" Bella yelled at us, appearing around the corner of the barn. She was out of breath and was still carrying a soapy dishrag. "Jake just left Charlie's office – he was so mad, he kicked my flower pot right off the front step!"

"Quil got busted outside the restaurant in town today – he had a joint," Emmett told her. A look of disbelief crossed Bella's face.

"Dammit. He was doing so good, too – where the hell did he get it?"

"I saw him with that guy – James?" I said. "That's who he was with before I found him – then Jake found me outside with Quil – and yeah – that looks just awesome, doesn't it?"

Bella's eyes widened. "James?" she said, shocked.

"Yeah – acne, ponytail?"

"No, I know who you mean – I just thought he was still in jail. He got in lots of trouble with Jake years ago – Sam too," she trailed off. "Does Charlie know he's back?" she asked, looking at Emmett.

Emmett nodded. "Yeah – I told him as soon as I found out. I'm gonna go check things out – catch you guys later."

"Huh," Bella replied, deep in thought. She chewed on her bottom lip and kicked at the loose gravel with the toe of her shoe. Jasper walked away from us, straightening out some of the stacks he'd made.

"Whatcha doing after this, Edward?" Bella asked, looking up at me.

"Talking with your old man," I replied with a grin. I was worried about my chat with Charlie. I hoped that he would believe me when I told him I wasn't involved in Quil's nonsense. Going off of my previous visits with Charlie, I knew it would be anything but straightforward and simple.

"Ok, um, do you wanna help me with dinner tonight?" she asked nervously.

"I'm not scheduled, am I?" I said, instantly regretting the words as soon as they left my mouth. Why I was such an idiot, I'd never know. Jasper started coughing loudly behind me and I could tell he was trying to cover his laughter.

"Oh, okay then," Bella said, looking at the ground. "I mean, you don't have to. I just thought that –"

"I'm a moron," I blurted out. "Of course I'll help – I'd love to." Jasper repeatedly cleared his throat, really struggling with his laughter now. Bella noticed too, and shook her head at him.

"Ok, good," she said, her whole face lit up with a grin, "Head to the kitchen when you're done with Charlie. Good luck!"

xoxoxoxoxo

"Jake tells me you were outside with Quil, Edward. Care to tell me what the hell that was about?" I'd only just sat down, and Charlie got right to business. Charlie clearly wasn't a time waster, nor did he beat around the bush. His office had a certain smell. It smelt clean, but like fire pit and cologne mixed together. I tried to keep my eyes off the picture of Bella and Eclipse that sat on the window sill just to the right of Charlie's cowboy hat-topped head, but it was tough. I needed desperately to focus, but I hadn't noticed it the last time I was there.

"I was, Sir," I started slowly, carefully choosing my words. "He was gone for a long time, so I went to check on him. I saw Quil through the window, so I went outside, and found him with that James guy."

"If Jake hadn't have found you, Edward, what would you have done next?" Charlie asked as he leaned back, crossing his arms across his chest.

"Well, I was hoping Quil would follow me back inside, but Jake saw us first."

"But what would you have done if Jake had never seen you?"

"Told Emmett?" I answered, hoping it was the correct one. I wanted to believe that I would have told Emmett. Part of me questioned whether or not I would have had the balls though – I liked Quil. Would I have ratted him out? It was tough – deep inside me I felt that _because_ I liked Quil, I _would_ rat him out.

"You don't sound so sure of that, kid," Charlie said, as he casually stroked his impressive – but clichéd – moustache with his index finger briefly.

"No, I would have. I like Quil. I don't want to see him screw himself up," I answered, sounding much more sure of myself this time.

Charlie nodded slowly and reclined in his chair. He wrote a few quick notes on his pad of paper, then stopped and drummed his pen against his desk.

"Do you think you're making improvements here, boy?" Charlie asked. "Now seems as good of a time as any for our follow-up chat. What sort of progress do you think you've made?"

I couldn't believe how quickly he moved away from the issue with Quil. I didn't even have to defend myself. Problem was – I wasn't prepared for this discussion at all.

"Well, Sir," I stalled, trying to buy myself a few seconds to think, "I liked working with Bella – the horses. Not Bella. I mean, I liked Bella, too," I stumbled, mortified. "The grooming though – I liked the grooming," I quickly recovered, mentally kicking myself for being such a fool.

"Go on," Charlie prompted, eyeing me carefully with one raised eyebrow.

"I've got my journal and an assignment from Rosalie. I haven't written in it yet, but I'll start tonight."

Charlie nodded some more, and made a few more notes.

"How're you feeling about being here, Edward?

I thought carefully about that for a moment. Bullshitting Charlie would get me nowhere, so I thought I'd start with something I'd been hashing over repeatedly in my head.

"Well," I said, being careful with my words, "I think I'm lucky. I mean, compared to Jasper and the guys? I don't know. My crap just seems so stupid."

"Hmm..." Charlie murmured, furrowing his brows in thought, "I'll tell you this much, Edward. Esme and Carlisle? They care an awful lot about you. They see a lot of potential in you just going to waste. Letting your life pass you by is stupid, Edward. Being here, dealing with it, taking this seriously, is not."

xoxoxoxoxo

"So he didn't give you even a little shit?" Bella laughed in disbelief while peeling a stack of peppers next to my cutting board.

"No. He didn't. I'm freaking shocked!" Charlie had given me the a-ok to leave his office, with instructions to make a phone call home to my parents soon, and to put extra effort into my journaling. I was totally surprised at how reasonably he handled the whole ordeal.

"Well, I'm glad everything's cool. It's kind of the nature of this place though, you know? Things happen," Bella replied wistfully.

"Do you always do the cooking around here?" I asked, bringing the conversation back to her. "All the food's been awesome."

"Thanks, and yes. I learned from my grandma. I love cooking – helps me relax. After those peppers, can you chop up this stuff for a salad?" she asked, gesturing to a big pile of veggies on the counter.

"Yeah, no problem. Salad, I can handle!" I smirked. My idea of cooking back home involved a microwave and a can opener. Esme was always making Carlisle and me try new things – she'd even do theme nights with stuff from different countries. She quit doing it around the time I quit showing up. That thought made my stomach ache for a moment. The painful, remorseful feeling was new.

"'Deal – as long as you promise not to throw it at me, ok?" she grinned. I picked up a piece of green pepper and tossed it at her. She caught it and playfully tossed it back at me.

"So, what's this I hear about a dance this weekend at the hall?" I asked, thinking it would be a perfect opportunity for some fun time with Bella. I just didn't want to be too obvious though, and set myself up for embarrassment if she already had plans. "Are you going?"

"Yeah, I think so. I overheard Jake and the guys talking about some party first, but I'm gonna skip that – not my scene anymore. Jasper won't go at all – he doesn't do well with that sort of thing."

_Perfect_, I thought. "Why don't we head over together then?"

"Yeah," Bella replied with a wide smile, "I'd like that."

xoxoxoxoxo

Everyone was gathered in the largest living room. Jasper, Quil and I were sharing one couch, while Jake and Sam were sprawled out across the other. Embry was seated on the floor between them, picking at his nails. Emmett was perched on the edge of an overstuffed leather recliner, and Rosalie was seated with her notepad in her lap on a dining room chair Emmett had carried in. Bella was in the kitchen finishing up dishes, and I was planning on helping her when the meeting was over.

"So guys," Rosalie began sweetly, "Lots went on today and I think there are all kinds of emotions flying around here. I think you'll all benefit from getting this out in the open so we can move forward, ok? So, where should we start?"

"I'll start," Quil said, his voice sounding tired. "I'd like to apologize to everyone – especially Edward. I know that looked shitty for you, and you could have gotten in trouble. I –"

"You don't have to apologize to him," Jake interrupted.

"Remember the rules, Jake," Rose admonished. "It's fine to share your feelings here – even the negative ones, but Quil wasn't finished, and he has the right to apologize if he feels he should. Are you finished, Quil?"

"Yeah, I just feel like an idiot, man – I don't know who I was trying to impress, but –"

"I do," Jake jumped in, again interrupting.

"What do you mean, Jacob?" Rosalie asked calmly. "Something here has obviously got you quite upset."

"Everything has," Jake snapped, staring directly at me. "That piece of shit comes in here like it's no big deal, takes a spot that someone else could have who needs it more, and acts like he owns the fucking place!" he yelled, his hands balling into fists on his knees.

"What the hell?" I piped in. If Jake thought he was going to get away with deliberately attacking me, he had another thing coming. "I haven't even done anything to –"

"Jake, calm this down – we're all willing to listen, but your language is out of hand," Rosalie said nervously, glancing over at Emmett.

"I'm not fucking done. He plays Mr. Cool Shit to Quil – I don't fuckin' like it. And now he's playing his city boy game on Bella? You have no fucking clue about her," he added sharply, thrusting his pointed finger at me from across the room.

"Easy Jake – don't make me get into this," Emmett piped in, standing from his spot and moving closer to the group.

"Get into it! I don't care!" Jake jumped out of his chair, his teeth clenched, his eyes full of rage. "It's not right – when she broke down at school, I was there for her. When all she did was cry and sleep, I was there. She was fucking depressed, asshole," he said, looking directly at me," and I was the one who helped her out of it." Everyone sat back quietly and stared at him. He ran his hands across his face and pulled tightly at his hair. He looked like he was losing steam. With a deep breath he continued, "And now this arrogant dick comes in thinking he can sweep her off her feet, and that this whole place is a joke? Fuck that." With that, Jake flopped back on the couch in the same spot he was sitting.

Rosalie cleared her throat. Quil and Sam were wordlessly motioning to one another, both looking confused at Jake's rant. I was furious. Overwhelmed, shocked and furious. How dare he accuse me of not being worthy of this place? Of playing some stupid game on Quil and Bella? And Bella – for him to come out and air her dirty laundry like that made me feel nothing but rage. If he could go off on a tangent like that, I saw no reason why I shouldn't.

"Edward, do you have anything –" Rosalie started, but I quickly cut her off.

"What, you jealous, asshole?" I yelled, staring directly at Jake. "Your brother calls you out on your bullshit, and what? Can't take it? And maybe Bella likes me? You got a problem with that? Who the hell cares!"

Jake jumped up from his spot on the couch, and at the same very moment, a load smash was heard in the kitchen, followed immediately by the sound of a slamming door.

"Everybody, cool down," Emmett boomed. I hadn't seen him angry yet – this was a first, and it was something. His face was red, and he looked mean – very unlike his regular self. "Edward, outside now. Jake, downstairs with me. Let's go shoot some pool, take a minute. You guys hear me? Don't make me have to break you up."

I could feel Jake's stare beating into me from across the room – and I was returning the death glare right back. Jake broke away first, but only after Quil walked up and patted him on the shoulder, leading him out.

"It's cool, man – don't let him get you down, ok?" Jasper said quietly to me. "Why don't you go find Bella? Take a few deep breaths. It'll help." He patted me on the back and followed the others out.

I made my way to the kitchen, hoping to vent to Bella and get her take on what just happened, but when I got there, the room was empty. The back door leading to the porch was banging opened and closed in the wind.

Just outside the doorway, Bella was sitting on the steps. Her head was in her hands and she was sniffling. I was wise enough to figure out that she was crying. What I wasn't wise enough to know was what the hell to do. I was never any good at dealing with someone else's sadness – especially girls. It made me awkward and uncomfortable. I never knew quite the right thing to say.

"Hey. Are you ok?" I asked, sitting down on the step beside her. She was hunched over her bent legs, her thick brown hair hiding her face from my view.

"Yes and no," she sniffled in soft, watery voice.

"Sorry things got crazy in there...Emmett stopped –"

"No, that's not it," she interrupted. She sounded so small, sad. I wanted to put my arm around her – do something – but I was afraid it would only make her more upset or weird her out.

"Well, what's wrong?"

"I wanted to be the one to tell you," she almost whispered. In the chaos inside, I hadn't even had time to process what Jake had confessed about Bella. She had been depressed – crying and sleeping all the time. She must have overheard the whole ordeal from the kitchen.

"It's my story to tell. I'm as angry as I am sad. Jake thinks he's protecting me – he's always like this. I wanted to tell you what happened _myself_."

"It's ok. You don't have to if –" I began. I had things that I liked to keep private. I would have totally understood if Bella wasn't ready to share her story with me yet.

"No, but I want to." She looked up at me and tucked her hair behind her ears. Her eyes were red, cheeks wet. I wanted to reach out and wipe them, but I held back.

"When I went away to school, things were just so different. I got used to my life here – the animals, the routines, knowing everyone. I didn't know anybody in the city. I used to talk to Jake a lot on the phone – it was comforting, familiar, you know?" she started fidgeting with her fingers in her lap.

"As the school year went on, things got worse. I was so tired all the time. Didn't want to go to my classes or do any of my work."

"That must have been awful," I said softly. Picturing Bella alone in her room made my stomach hurt. She should have been out – enjoying herself, having fun.

"It was, but I'm doing a million times better now. Rosalie's helped me out a lot. I'm gonna try again next fall," she said with a small smile.

"I'm really glad," I replied sincerely, looking right at her. She smiled and nodded at me.

"So what's the deal with Jake then? You guys just talked on the phone?" I didn't want to let on too much – I eavesdropped on the conversation where Quil was making fun of her and Jake hooking up – but I was curious whether or not she'd tell me the full story.

"We did, but there was more. Walk with me?" she suggested, climbing up off the steps. I nodded up at her and quickly followed along.

"Charlie was getting worried – we'd talked a little – I tried to keep things from him, but as you may already know, you can't keep anything from Charlie."

"So I've seen," I replied with a grin. We started down a little path at the tree line – thick green brush and trees on either side. Every now and then we'd pass a lantern staked in the ground.

"It worked out that Jake had a mechanics course in the city. Charlie sent him to check on me. Next thing I know, Jake's got me packed up and I'm moved back in here."

"Were you ok with that?"

"I had to be. He cared – cares – about me, but he's always kind of wanted more. We tried that for awhile –"

"More?" I asked, obviously digging.

"Yes, Edward. More," Bella giggled. I felt a huge sense of relief seeing a smile back on her face.

"Weak, Bella. You and Jake bumped uglies?" I teased, hoping to lighten the mood a little.

"Eww, Edward!" Bella laughed. "We did hook up, yes, but we mostly hung out a lot. It was good and all, but it just never felt right."

"Did Charlie know?" I asked. I was curious about how he would receive that kind of relationship.

"Oh, hell no. He knew we were close, but we were careful about that stuff around Charlie. There's my cabin, see?" Bella pointed through the trees to a cottage. It was charming – little flower boxes on the front windows, lace curtains, a seat for two on the tiny front porch.

"Thank you so much for this, Edward – for listening and stuff. I um, I really like spending time with you."

"Same here, Bella, really," I replied, and it was true – I was enjoying every minute with her. My days at the ranch were bearable because I looked forward to my next encounter with Bella.

"I probably won't see you much this week – but Friday, we're still on, right?" Bella asked, looking a little unsure.

"Of course – I can't wait," I replied.

Bella stepped in close to me. I wasn't sure if she wanted a hug, but I went for it and opened my arms up for her. She wrapped herself around my waist for a quick second and squeezed gently. Her hair had the sweetest smell – I wanted to breathe it in deeply but didn't want her to think I was creepy.

She pulled back slightly, and I dropped my arms, expecting that to be the end of our little embrace, but I was totally surprised when she quickly pressed her lips to my cheek, just above my jaw.

"Good night, Edward," she said as headed off towards her cottage.

"Yeah – night," is all I was coherent enough for. My walk back to the house was more like a stroll, all anger and frustration I had over the Jake situation now forgotten.

xoxoxoxoxoxo

After a lengthy shower – of the tension-relieving variety – I retired to my room. Typically when taking care of my "business," random body parts and faces played on a loop through my brain. Tonight, my thoughts were stuck on Bella. The feel of her lips on me, the swell of her breasts against her t-shirt, her ass in those jeans – I couldn't get any of it out of my head. It felt like it had been forever since I'd been with anyone – and the feeling was just intensified by new thoughts and visions of Bella.

Journal in one hand, dictionary in the other, I got comfortable in bed propped up against my headboard. The very first thing I wrote was my definition. I copied it straight from the Merriam Webster dictionary resting in my lap:

**Definition of **_**APATHY**_

1**:** lack of feeling or emotion **:** impassiveness

2**:** lack of interest or concern **:** indifference

I stared at the words on the page. I cared. I had to. I did. Light bulbs were going off in my head and my mind was racing. Things were suddenly starting to make sense. I put so much effort into showing people that I didn't care, and by showing them that they believed that I didn't.

I thought about what Jake said earlier – how he thought I didn't give a shit about this place, or anything else for that matter. I had to admit – even though I couldn't stand the asshole – I saw some truth in his words. I came here with the intention to just shut my mouth and get it over with. Never did I think that my eyes would be opened the way they already had been. Seeing the adversity that the other guys had overcome, seeing the faith and trust that others put into the program, helped me to see that I would be an idiot to waste anymore time here.

I picked up my pen, and in large thick letters across my page I wrote, "I'm going to stop spending my time pretending that I don't care." Satisfied with my new goal, I set my alarm for 5:30 a.m. and crawled under my blankets. The early mornings were a tough adjustment. By 10:00 p.m, I was bushed.

Just as I reached for my lamp, there was a loud knock at my door. "Come in!" I shouted. The last person I was ever expecting to see leaned against my door frame.

"I'm told I owe you an apology?" Jake said in a low voice, his eyebrows furrowed, arms crossed across his chest.

"Oh?" I replied. I was surprised to see him. He had clearly calmed down and seemed almost glum.

"So – I'm sorry. Just know, man, that the countdown is on. Do whatever it is you need to do and go the hell home."

I just rolled my eyes at him, running my hands through my hair. "Shitty ass apology accepted," I replied.

He turned to leave, but with my new resolution fresh on my mind, I quickly spoke up, "Wait –" He stared at me, a confused look on his face.

"I'm sorry about Quil. That's gotta suck for you. He seems like a good kid, and it must be hard," I said sincerely.

Jake nodded, staring at a spot on my floor. "Yeah. It is," he said, as he quietly shut my door.

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	10. Chapter 10

**A/N Big thanks to my awesome beta, Robzbeanie and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91. You guys are the best! Thank you to everyone who has been recc'ing The Ranch out there – I really appreciate it. xoxo **

**The Ranch**

**Chapter 10**

The next few days at the Ranch passed quickly and without anything overly exciting happening. After Jake's half-assed apology, he kept his distance from me. He and Quil had been kept busy repairing the busted-up old truck they'd been working on forever, as well as a few tractors and other pieces of farm machinery.

Sam and Embry were particularly busy – the fall was harvest time, and the guys were working around the clock to harvest the wheat. Apparently snow and frost was not unheard of this time of year this far north, even though the weather had been mild, and exposure to the elements could mean poor values on the crops. Jasper and I even took a few shifts running the combine to give Sam and Embry a much-needed break.

The week had shot by so quickly, that I hardly had any time to think about my plans with Bella. Friday snuck up on us. Bella and I had hardly seen any of one another. Aside from a few moments here and there in the kitchen and at meals, we were running in opposite directions.

Emmett and I were assigned to clean out the stables, which meant a morning full of shit-shovelling and scrubbing. I was using my sort-of-date with Bella as motivation to get through the dirty job. On my schedule for the day I had also noticed a block of time in the late afternoon marked "Bella – horses" that I was curious about, but really looking forward to.

"Holy crap, Eddie – look at this one!" Emmett laughed as he dumped a pile of horse shit the size of my head into the wheelbarrow with his pitchfork-like shovel.

"What are you, thirteen?" I chuckled at him, shaking my head.

"At heart, I'd say so," he smirked. "Being around all you fools keeps me young."

"You always been here? At the Ranch? " I asked. Aside from my drive in to the Ranch, Emmett and I had yet to hang out one on one. I knew that he was Bella's cousin, that he lived just off the Ranch, that he was engaged to Rosalie and that he worked here – but I wasn't really sure of anything else.

"No, not always," he replied. "Charlie is my uncle – he's my mom's brother. Mom raised me all on her own – Charlie was the only real guy in my life. She sent me to live out here with Charlie when I was seventeen."

"Why?" I asked, scraping at a wet spot in the bedding with my rake. Emmett had explained how important it was to the horse's health to have a clean stall – I wanted to show him I could do a good job.

"To be honest, I was a lot like you," he said, as he pushed the wheelbarrow into the next stall. "Minor trouble, goofing off. I didn't know what to do with myself. I was in my last year of high school and Charlie was just getting this place going. Mom thought he'd be able to set me straight – she was right."

"What changed you?" I asked.

"Well," Emmett paused, leaning on his shovel, "Charlie helped me to see what I was capable of. Showed me what I could accomplish. He made me feel important – like I was competent."

I thought about that for a minute. I had accomplished a lot myself already. The work was hard, but it was gratifying. If someone had asked me a few weeks back if I'd have been able to do all the things I'd recently done – cleaned chicken coops, built fences, ran machinery, groomed a horse – I'd have looked at them like they had two heads.

"When I finished school, I already knew what I wanted to do," Emmett continued. "I wanted to help others out the way Charlie helped me. I went into teaching – Charlie had brought in tutors before, but it was hard to find someone consistent. It felt like the right move. I met Rosie at university – the rest is history."

"Huh. That's cool though," I replied as I raked the bedding back in place in the stall and replaced it with fresh stuff. Emmett seemed genuinely happy. Knowing that he started out much the same way I did was kind of reassuring.

Emmett stood his shovel up against the wall of the neighbouring stall, and leaned against the wall nearest me. "I've gotta ask you something serious, Eddie. This might be sort of a conflict of interest, but I can't help it, I have to."

"Ok?" I replied curiously.

"What's up with you and Bella?" he blurted out.

"Um, what do you mean?" I stalled.

"You like her – I can tell. And from what I see, she likes you, too. I normally wouldn't even stick my nose into this – I know you're both old enough, and I'm not here to give you "the talk," but dude, she's my cousin."

"Yeah?" I replied carefully, giving him the side eye.

"What I'm getting at, Eddie, is that I don't want her to get hurt. She's a good girl – if you're just in it for a hoorah or two, make sure she knows that. Don't drag her along. We all know you're only here for so long," he said. "If this is because she's the only girl here, man, just quit now. I'm not trying to be a dick, but just don't."

I hadn't really given much thought to my return home lately. I was so caught up in my thoughts of Bella at the moment, that I hadn't even thought that far ahead. But Emmett was right – I was eventually leaving. Bella was a sweet girl, and I didn't want to hurt her. On the other hand, she knew that I was eventually leaving, too. Was it wrong to enjoy one another's company for the time being?

"I do like her, I'm not gonna lie –" I started. "But I don't know – we're just hanging out, having fun. You've got nothing to worry about, I promise," I replied, looking him straight in the eye. If it meant taking a bit of a step back – reining in some of my feelings to prevent hurting Bella, I would do it.

xoxoxoxoxox

The ringing of the phone in my ear was driving me nuts. Esme had programmed the answering machine to pick up after seven rings. She was always running for the phone and would just barely miss it. I was beginning to think no one was home, when on the second call, sixth ring, someone finally picked up.

"Hello?" a breathless Carlisle answered. "Edward? Is that you?" He must have just glanced at the caller id.

"Hey, yeah – it's me," I replied with a grin. It felt weird – good weird – to hear his voice. I'd sent a few texts to both Esme and Carlisle since I'd been here, but this was the first time I'd called.

"Esme!" Carlisle yelled, muffling his voice by covering up the receiver. "It's Edward! Yes! Hurry!"

The rustling sound of another phone picking up came over the line. "Oh my goodness, Edward!" an equally out of breath Esme squealed. "I'm so glad you called!"

I chuckled, "What were you guys doing?"

"Well we, um –" Carlisle stalled.

"Your uncle's been on nights, so we, uh," Esme quickly interrupted.

"A movie –" Carlisle stammered. I was beginning to wish I'd never asked.

"Who cares about us though," Esme cut in, "How are you, Edward? It's been so quiet around here. We miss you so much."

"I'm good, actually, and I miss you guys, too. I kind of even like it here."

"That's a surprise!" Carlisle chuckled. "But I'm glad, son. I figured you would."

"Have they been feeding you well, Edward?" Esme asked, concerned.

"Yeah, Esme – the food's great, most of the guys are great – it's actually alright up here."

"Charlie have you working pretty hard?" Carlisle asked. "Is his daughter around now, too? Isabel, was it?"

I thought about that for a moment. "Yes, long days – lots of hard work. And yeah – Bella's here. How'd you know about her?" I asked, curious.

"Oh, um, Charlie didn't tell you?"

"No," I said slowly, dragging out the "o."

"Huh. Well, next time you have a chance, ask him how he knows me," Carlisle replied.

"Oh for crying out loud, we aren't related or something stupid, are we?" I asked, annoyed. It would be just my luck that Bella would wind up being my distant cousin or something.

Carlisle and Esme both laughed. "No, son – nothing like that," he chuckled. "I'll just leave it for Charlie to explain. He's better at the storytelling then I am, anyway."

After a good ten minutes of catching up – I filled them in on all my recent accomplishments – we said our goodbyes. A weepy Esme told me over and over again how much she missed me, while a calm and collected Carlisle told me how proud he was. It felt good – really good – to finally be doing right in their eyes. I hung up with a promise to call back soon, and a new feeling of pride. I was really curious about Charlie's connection to Carlisle, and made a mental note to follow up on that as soon as I could.

xoxoxoxox

After grabbing a couple sandwiches from the platter in the dining room and washing them down with a giant glass of milk, I made my way to the barn to find Bella. My schedule said "Bella – horses" but not much else. I was curious and nervous – both about the horses and about our evening plans.

Bella was standing with her back to me, brushing Eclipse just outside the barn doors. Her hair was up in a ponytail, and she was wearing another one of those plaid button downs that looked like it belonged in Charlie's closet. This time she had on a pair of tight, dark jeans and cowboy boots in place of the rubbers. I recognized the big white horse, but the difference today was that a dark leather saddle was resting on her back.

"Hey!" I said, hoping not to startle her or the animal too badly. Bella turned to me with a grin.

"Hey – you ready?" she asked.

"Ready for what?" I nervously replied, arching one eyebrow. If she thought I was getting on the horse today without a fight, she had another thing coming.

"Your first ride! It'll just be a quick one – we'll go for a little walk. Eclipse is easy, I promise you'll be fine." She looked at me with a little pout. I didn't want to look like a total coward, and I just couldn't argue with her. The term "whipped" popped into my head, but I let it go.

"Ok, fine – but if I fall off this horse and break my neck, who's gonna take you to the dance?" I asked, wringing my fingers out trying to contain my nerves.

"Puh – lease. You're being a tit. Come put your foot in here," she motioned towards a stirrup, "And grab on here," she said as she grabbed the bump on the front of the saddle. "Just hoist yourself up and over. We don't have all day."

I moved closer to Eclipse and grabbed hold of the saddle. I stuck my foot in the stirrup, and hopped up with ease. Eclipse started shifting and wiggling beneath me.

"Whoa, Bella, what the hell," I cried, nervously. Now that I was completely at the animal's mercy, my fear was getting harder and harder to hide.

Bella just giggled and stroked at the horse's neck. She picked up the reins in her hand. "She's just getting used to you, trust me, ok?"

"Easy for you to say. You've got both feet on the ground!" I hollered. The desire to bail was getting stronger and stronger, and Eclipse was getting even more fidgety.

"Remember what I told you when we were grooming? She can tell when you're nervous. Just try and relax." Bella's hand grasped my knee gently and squeezed. She looked up at me and gave a little grin. She started brushing at Eclipse's mane again and cooing softly to her. After only a few moments, Eclipse had relaxed and so had I.

"Ok, I'm good," I said as I shifted a bit in the saddle to get comfortable. My thighs were getting stiff, my junk was feeling squished and we hadn't even moved a foot.

"Alright – we're just gonna take a bit of a walk. It seems so dead around here. Did you see Jake and Quil before they left?" Bella asked.

"No – didn't even know they'd left already," I replied. Bella had started moving forward, her pace slow and steady. For such a large animal, Eclipse followed her lead with grace and smoothness. It wasn't half as bumpy of a ride as I expected.

"Well, they were pretty excited to have the day free. I'm surprised Charlie let Quil go, to be honest," she said. Quil had picked up a handful of new chores after the incident with the joint in town, but that was the end of it. I had also expected more fallout.

"Aren't they going to some party first? You sure you didn't want to check it out? I could go with you if –"

"No," Bella interrupted, "Those guys are idiots. It's just not my thing. Since I got back from school, I've stayed away from the local party crowd. You doing ok up there?"

"Yeah," I chuckled, shifting around again in the saddle, trying to get comfy. "Just um, a little uncomfortable, but I'm good." I'd relaxed considerably – talking with Bella helped. "So, were you ever much of a partier?" I asked.

"A little," she replied, her voice soft. "I mean, I'm not a total wet blanket. With my medication and stuff now though, I don't drink much. The odd beer here and there, but that's it. I don't mind though – I prefer it this way. I like doing smaller group stuff – camping trips are my favourite."

"Camping? Like, in a tent?" I asked. Carlisle and Esme weren't the camping type – we did a road trip once in a rented RV the size of a decent apartment. It even had satellite TV.

"Yes, a tent! Have you never been camping, Edward?" Bella shook her head and chuckled. "You've gotta come with us. Next week maybe – before it gets too cold. It's a date, k?"

"Sure," I groaned, readjusting myself again in the saddle. Eclipse was a sturdy ride, but the pressure between my legs was killing me. There had to be a better way. "Um, is this supposed to hurt?" I asked, embarrassed.

Bella looked up at me with a curious expression, her eyes widening when she realized what I meant. "Oh, um, well –" she stalled. I could see her ears and cheeks turning red. "What kind of underwear are you wearing?"

"Me? Um, boxers. Wanna see?" I teased. Bella rolled her eyes and scoffed at me.

"You need some nut huggers – tighty whiteys, or boxer briefs even. Something with some support." Bella was trying to keep her voice serious, but she looked up at me and we both burst into laughter.

"Ok, good to know," I chuckled. I certainly wouldn't make that mistake twice.

"We should probably head back," Bella said, peeking at the thin watch on her wrist. "I've got to get ready for the dance and get Eclipse back. You did good up there, Edward. How do you feel?"

"I feel pretty good – it wasn't as scary as I thought," I confessed. "I'm excited for tonight, too – should I meet you at your cabin?"

"Yeah," Bella replied with a wide smile. "That'll be perfect."

xoxoxoxoxo

All day long six o'clock had seemed so far away, but as I frantically threw clothes around my room at 5:30, it seemed much too soon. I'd finally decided on a pair of dark jeans and a dark grey dress shirt. My hair had gotten longer, so styling it was a disaster. I didn't want to look like I'd been over-thinking things, even though I totally had been.

The sun had already started setting in the sky as I approached Bella's cottage. The breeze in the air was cool, which was a relief, as I was sweating bullets and was as nervous as hell. Just as I reached my hand up to knock, Bella pulled the door wide open for me.

"Hey," she said softly, taking a moment to look me over. "Wow – you look great."

"Thanks, so do you," I replied, stunned. Bella looked amazing – she had on a dark blue knee-length dress that swished around her legs when she moved. It had a v neck, hinting at just a little cleavage. Her hair was down and loosely curled. Her feet were bare, her toes painted a soft pink. She was stunning, and it all looked effortless.

"Come in for a minute, k? I've just gotta pack up my purse." I nodded and made my way inside. I noticed a shoe rack just inside the front door. Bella had already rounded the entryway into what I assumed was the bedroom, but called out at me, "Oh yeah – take off your shoes! You Americans!" she trailed off. I slipped my shoes off and busied myself with exploring.

The cottage was small, but had everything a person would need. The living room, kitchen and dining area were all in one big room, with two doors off the back which I assumed were the bedroom and bathroom. It all looked cozy – a fuzzy blue blanket was tossed over the arm of an overstuffed couch in the living room. A stack of books rested next to an empty coffee mug on the coffee table. I could picture Bella curled up there. It was welcoming and comfortable.

A collection of picture frames atop a bookshelf caught my eye. From across the room I could see the same picture Charlie had in his office of Bella and Eclipse. Beside it was a smaller picture of a baby girl – presumably Bella, and a much younger Charlie dressed in the traditional red Mountie gear. A picture of a toothless Bella sitting atop a younger, skinnier Emmett's shoulders grinning like a maniac made me chuckle to myself. I picked up a larger collage frame leaning against the wall – inside were pictures of Bella and a pretty native girl at various ages and places.

"Whatcha looking at?" I jumped at the sound of Bella's voice.

"Oh, sorry – " I said. "You were just so cute, I couldn't help it," I teased.

"No fair!" Bella whined. "I don't get to see any embarrassing stuff of yours!"

"Not true," I replied, my mind instantly fixing on the picture tucked safely in my wallet. "I do have something I can show you, but not now. Next time though, ok?"

"Deal," she nodded, resigned. "Let's get going though – don't want to be late!"

xoxoxoxoxo

What the Swan Crossing Community Hall was lacking in appearance, it made up for in space. The place was huge, and people were everywhere. Multicoloured strands of patio lanterns hung along the wide front porch and all around the large open room inside the hall. There was a gigantic open dance floor, filled with couples of all ages. It was a sea of plaid and Wranglers.

The DJ had set up camp in the back corner, complete with giant antique speakers and a flashing disco ball above his table. Couples were spinning around the dance floor to both new and old country songs, and a full potluck buffet was stretched out along the far wall of the space.

It was crowded, and I used that fact to my advantage and took Bella's hand in mine as we made our way through the crowd to an empty table. Everyone that passed seemed to know Bella – old ladies stopped and asked how her father was, older men stopped and asked how her horses were doing.

Across the dance floor, I spotted both Emmett and Rosalie. Emmett was leading Rosalie around the floor, twirling and spinning in time to the upbeat song. Her face was set in a giant grin as they moved together with ease across the room.

"Hey, look," Bella's voice snapped my attention back. "There's Alice. Have you met her?" she asked.

"Yeah, she was working at the diner that day," I answered. Alice looked quite different from the day at the diner – in place of her uniform, she had on a black dress with tiny white polka dots, and a black ribbon tying her shorter hair off her face. She was cute – I could definitely see what Jasper saw in her.

"Hey Bells," she called out as she approached us. "I haven't seen you forever!" The girls embraced in a squealing hug. "Wait a sec – you're that guy!" she said, pointing right at me. "Is he, Bella?"

"That guy?" I asked Bella, raising my voice over the music. Bella had her mouth open, shaking her head at a loss for words.

"Yeah," Alice shouted over top of the new song. "The one Bella was texting about – she told me to look for you at the diner!"

"You did?" I asked Bella with a smirk. I was ecstatic – if she was getting her friend to check me out, that had to be a good sign.

"Whatever!" Bella retorted, rolling her eyes at me and Alice, clearly embarrassed.

"Well, nice to actually meet you, Edward," she said, reaching out and giving my hand a really firm shake – something I didn't expect from her tiny grasp. "Did he come?" Alice asked, a hint of sadness in her eyes. Bella shook her head no.

"I'm sorry, Ali – he didn't. Why don't you come out camping with us though? I'll make Jasper come – that's more his department," Bella bellowed.

"K, call me! Have a good night, you guys!" Alice called out, as she disappeared back into the crowd.

"You know how to dance, Edward?" Bella asked, elbowing me in the ribs.

"A little. Do you?" I asked, for once in my life grateful for the dance classes that Esme made me take when I was thirteen. She had signed Carlisle and herself up, but Carlisle got stuck working night shifts so I wound up filling in more than once.

"Also a little." She smiled up at me coyly.

"Is that a hint?" I asked with a wink.

"Yes," she replied, as she thrust her hand out at me. "Do me the honour, Edward."

We walked hand in hand to a clear spot on the dance floor. I carefully guided Bella in place at my side, and placed my palm on the small of her back. It took us a few tries to get a rhythm going, but once we fell into stride, we were moving along doing the two-step effortlessly.

"Don't try anything fancy on me here, Edward," Bella joked. "We're doing just fine like this. Emmett always tries to throw me all around – freaks me out!" she laughed. As much as I wanted to tease, I felt it better to not – having Bella close to me like this was nice and I didn't want to ruin the moment.

"Is country the only music you people listen to?" I asked, leading us in somewhat of a circular pattern amongst the other couples. "It's driving me nuts."

"Well – yes and no. At my place I've got some good stuff – if you need a break, just come listen."

"I'll be taking you up on that for sure," I smiled. "So much that you might regret ever offering it."

"I doubt that," she said with a smile, pressing her fingertips a little firmer into my waist.

We made our way around the floor, weaving in and out of the other couples until the song came to an end. Just as we started heading back to our table, I spotted Quil storming through the main doors. He pulled out a chair in a huff and slumped down in it, his arms crossed across his chest. Sam and Embry followed in after him and grabbed chairs at the end of the table. They had their heads close together and were talking excitedly back and forth.

"Hey, you wanna go outside and cool off a bit?" Bella asked. "It's getting kinda warm in here."

"Sure, lead the way!" I replied, taking her hand in mine again. She gave me another big smile and started leading us to the door. Just as we were about to head outside, we ran right into Charlie. Bella instantly let go of my hand.

"Dad!" she said, startled. "How, um, how are you?" Charlie was linked arm in arm with a tall, older native lady with long dark hair.

"Bella, Edward," Charlie said with a nod. "You kids enjoying yourselves?" he asked, giving us each a quick once over.

"Yes, Sir," I replied. "We're just going out for some fresh air."

"Well then," he nodded, "Have a good night. See you at home." With that, Charlie quickly led the lady he was with to the dance floor.

"Who was that? Charlie's got a lady friend?" I asked, elbowing Bella playfully in the ribs.

"Pft. That's Sue. You remember the picture frame you were checking out at my place? That was me and her daughter, Leah. She's my best friend. Charlie and Sue are friends – they exchanged 'girl raising' stories for years."

"Right," I teased, dragging the word out. "Charlie's gonna tap that."

Bella slapped me jokingly on the arm and dragged me around the corner of the hall where the crowd had thinned out. The sound of yelling and hollering drew my attention to the parking lot.

Surrounding an old beat-up car was a group of guys and a few girls – a few of them I recognized from the diner. They had music blasting, the car vibrating with the low shitty bass. Apparently, they'd caught Bella's eye, too.

"Shit, Edward. That's Jake," Bella said, pointing over at the crowd. Sure enough, it was him – and he was shot gunning a beer while the rest of the group cheered him on. He and another guy were having a race – from what I could tell, the other guy was James. "He's not supposed to be drinking," Bella said, looking up at me, nervousness written across her face.

"What should we do?" I asked. I reached into my pocket and felt around for the almost empty pack of cigarettes I had stashed there. I'd barely smoked any since I'd arrived at the Ranch, but the stress of the situation was making me desperately want one.

Knowing the way Jake had behaved with me in the past, I knew that a drunk Jake could only be worse. I didn't need him fucking up the progress I'd been making – on myself or with Bella.

"We should go tell Charlie," Bella said quietly to me, eyeing my hand rooting in my pocket. "And don't smoke, please?" she asked.

I nodded at her and turned to make my way back inside, my hand low on Bella's back again, but it was too late.

"Bella, baby!" Jake's deep voice rang out from the parking lot. "I've been waiting for you all night. Damn girl – you look good!" he said, lewdly looking Bella up and down. Bella paused in her tracks and looked down at the floor, swallowing hard.

"Jake, we're just going –"

"That's cool, Eddie – I'll take her from here," he sneered at me. He was a few feet away but I could smell the booze on him from where I was. Bella looked up at me, worry written all over her face.

"Why don't we dance, Jake," Bella suggested, her voice soft. She locked eyes with me and gave me a pleading look. "Stay close," she mouthed at me.

It took every ounce of strength in me not to rip Jake's giant arm off of Bella's shoulder. As he led her inside, I watched from very close behind as he leaned in to Bella's ear and murmured something that made her slightly cower away. She glanced over her shoulder at me, presumably to be sure I was still close.

I parked myself against one of the supporting beams alongside the dance floor. I had a clear view of Bella – there was no way she was getting out of my sight. I admired her idea and composure – moving into the public room with the obviously intoxicated Jake made sense, and Bella was holding it together well.

I clenched and unclenched my fists and tightly crossed my arms across my chest. I didn't like this – not even a little bit. I was mentally willing Charlie and Emmett to show up and figure him out before the song ended. If by the end of the shitty tune no one had caught on to him, I was planning to find Charlie myself.

As I watched Jake and Bella dance, I noticed how he didn't stop talking at all. I tried to make out the words from his lips, but nothing made sense. Bella just nodded her head and smiled a weak smile at him – the type that never reached her eyes.

Just as I reached out to crack my knuckles, Jake's head snapped in my direction, his stare locking right on me.

"He's fucking looking at you!" Jake yelled, startling the couples promenading nearby. "Stop fucking staring at her, you piece of shit," he slurred at me. "She doesn't fucking want you, city boy. Go home," he yelled, his arms still planted around Bella's waist. People close by had all stopped to stare.

I looked him right in the eye, and shook my head.

"That's it," he fumed, dropping his arms from Bella and lunging in my direction. Bella reached out her hand to stop him but he roughly swatted it away. "It's fucking on!"

The music came to a sudden stop as Jake stomped over to me. Adrenaline was pumping through me – I stood my ground, waiting to see what he had planned. He picked up two chairs that were in his path and flung them carelessly out of the way.

When he reached me, he puffed his chest up and put his face right up in mine. He was sweating like crazy and his pupils were wide. I continued to meet his stare, my nonchalance clearly driving him wild.

"Hit me, bitch," he seethed through his teeth.

"No," I calmly replied. I was vibrating. People were starting to gather around. I could hear someone calling Jake's name through the crowd.

"Jake!" Charlie bellowed as he pushed his way through the bystanders, breaking us from our stare down. "Outside. Now!"

Instead of following Charlie's orders, Jake quickly drew his hand back and landed his fist right beneath my left eye. A disgusting crack filled the air, and I felt a warm blast spurt from my cheek. I stumbled back a few steps, and everything seemed to be moving in slow motion.

The sounds around me went fuzzy, and I watched as two guys – one of them definitely Emmett – tackled Jake to the ground. Even while the two men were holding him, Jake was still putting up a fight and struggling back. I could make out gasps and screams and a lot of people shuffling around and being led from the hall.

The next thing I knew, I was sitting in a chair just outside the main doors with a dishrag pressed up to my face. Bella's sweet voice was the first thing to snap me out of my daze.

"Oh my God, Edward – that's bleeding quite a bit. Are you ok?" she asked, her voice small. Her cheeks were red and her eyes were watering – she was definitely upset.

"Where did everybody go?" I asked. The music had just resumed inside, and most of the people had disappeared.

"Well, Jake's around the other side of the hall with Emmett and Charlie. I think Sam's there, too. They're talking to the cops – he's getting booked. I'm so embarrassed," she sighed.

I nodded at Bella, still confused and a little disoriented. "Don't be embarrassed," I mumbled, trying really hard to form a coherent sentence. "I didn't even get to hit him back."

"Don't worry about that – it's for the best," Bella said sadly. "The cops were called before he even hit you. I guess he's been causing trouble around town all night. They were on their way to check things out anyway."

"Should we go over there?" I asked. My cheek felt mostly numb, but was starting to sting a little right on the apple of my cheek.

"Yeah, actually. They wanted to talk to you once you snapped out of it."

Around the corner, an RCMP car was parked with its lights flashing. Charlie and Emmett were huddled closely with two officers who appeared to be taking notes. Quil was sitting close by on the bottom step, Sam and Embry sitting just behind him a few stairs back.

"Edward, I'm glad you made it over here," Charlie said, his eyes tired. "Why don't you have a seat. We've got some things to figure out here." The police officers followed Charlie over to the staircase where the other guys were seated.

Quil moved over and made room for me without saying a word. Bella stood just off to the side of Charlie. Emmett stayed close to the police car, speaking softly through the window. I assumed he was talking to Jake.

"I need answers, boys, and I need them now," Charlie started, his tone more serious then I'd ever heard it. "Either someone starts talking, or I'll have my boys here take you guys in for question time. What's it gonna be?" he asked, pointing with his thumbs to the uniformed men on either side of him.

"He's high," Quil said softly.

"What do you mean, Quil," Charlie prompted.

"He's high. And drunk. Fuck –" Quil swore, kicking at the gravel and hopping up from the step. "He told me everything at the party tonight."

"Go on, son," Charlie said softly. "We need to know – you know that, right?"

Quil stuck his hands deep in his pockets and nodded. "I know. I met him at James' place tonight. I knew he wasn't right when I got there. He told me everything – how he's been using a little again, how he wanted me to smoke up with him. How he thought that if Edward was getting in shit around the Ranch that the pressure would be off of us. How he scored some coke off of James. All of it."

"Did you touch any of it, Quil?" Charlie asked, his face stern.

"No, man. I swear I didn't. I was so pissed at him that I called Sam to pick me up early."

"Is that true?" Charlie asked Sam. Sam just nodded, staring at the ground.

"Ok, that's all we need to know then. Edward?" Charlie said, looking right at me. "You know that you can press charges if you want to. It's up to you."

I thought about that for a moment. As much as I wanted Jake to get everything he deserved, it just didn't feel right. "No, Charlie. I'm good," I replied. "Just get him some help."

Charlie looked me in the eye for a moment, and gave a small nod. "Alright – I want you all to head back. Rosalie and Emmett will be meeting you boys in the kitchen. Edward, you see that Bella makes it home alright. I'll meet you all there later."

xoxoxoxox

The truck ride back to Bella's was quiet. Bella drove while I held the dishrag up to my busted-up cheek. Even though it bled a lot, I wouldn't require stitches. Bella told me that she had some butterfly bandages back at the Ranch that would work fine to close it up.

When we arrived back on the property, Bella pulled up in front of her cottage, but paused before getting out.

"I um, I can take you back to the main house, if you'd prefer. I'm sorry – I should have –"

"No!" I quickly cut her off. "I'd like to come in, I mean, if that's ok –"

"Of course!" she replied. "Our time kind of got cut short. God, Edward. I'm so sorry –"

"Please, Bella – don't apologize for him," I said sincerely. I didn't want her to feel that she had any part in the fuckery that made up the latter part of the night. "I was having an awesome time with you – it's no one's fault but his."

Bella nodded and unlocked the power doors. I followed her up the step and held the door open for her.

"Make yourself comfy. I'll get you a bag of peas. Do you drink tea?" she asked as she started rifling through her freezer.

"No, but just water would be good," I answered.

"Ok, I'll be right back."

A few moments later, Bella returned with a bottle of water, a bag of frozen peas wrapped in a towel and a wet wash cloth.

"Let me take a look at that, k? I'll clean you up just a little." She carefully sat on the edge of the coffee table in front of me and took the bloody rag I'd been using from my hand. She then delicately traced my cheekbone with her index finger.

"What's the damage?" I murmured. It was starting to sting more and more, but having Bella in such close proximity was taking my mind off of it.

"It's pretty ugly," she giggled, as she started dabbing gently at the wound. "You're probably gonna have a shiner, maybe a little scar, too."

"Chicks dig scars though, right?" I smirked, then winced a little as she applied more pressure.

"Thank you for doing this for me, Bella," I said genuinely. "You make an excellent nurse."

"Why thank you," she replied sweetly, while she leaned in even closer to wipe at the dried-on blood that had run down my neck. If I turned my head just a fraction of an inch, I could have kissed the spot right behind her ear. The thought alone made me shiver.

Bella pulled back slightly, and before I had the chance to think it through, I reached out and quickly grabbed her wrist, drawing her to me. The tip of her tongue peeked out between her lips, wetting them slightly before her top teeth pressed firmly into her bottom lip.

I looked up from her mouth and straight into Bella's eyes – she was watching me watch her, and the corners of her lips were beginning to pull up in a grin. My opportunity was now, and I was taking it.

Bella's hand made its way from my shoulder up the back on my neck, and with gently pressure, she started guiding her face to mine. I took over in an instant, hurrying the moment. I couldn't help it – I needed to touch her. The emotionally charged evening aside, I'd been wishing for this since I first laid eyes on her.

Our lips crashed together, with pressure gentle but firm. I reached my hand up and cradled the back of Bella's head, pulling her to me, as our mouths moved together. Her warm lips parted slightly, allowing me deeper, closer. I had never in any of my experiences felt so much from something as simple as a kiss.

Bella pulled back first, a soft sigh escaping, followed by a slightly embarrassed giggle. I ran my fingers up and down her arms, knowing that this was it for the evening, but wanting so desperately to touch her, to feel more.

"Everyone's probably wondering where I am," I said softly.

"Yeah, you should probably get back," Bella sighed. Her breath was heavy – it matched mine.

"I'll work on that camping trip, okay?" Bella said. "We should do this – well – not quite like tonight, but you know, this...again, maybe?"she asked, again with the nervous questions.

"We should. As soon as we can, please," I chuckled, lightening the mood. I picked up my bag of peas and made my way to the door. "Goodnight, Bella," I said, stepping in to the doorway. As I walked down her front steps, I glanced over my shoulder. Bella was peeking out her curtains at me. I gave her a small wave and headed back to the main house.

When I made my way through the main door, I walked in quietly. I wasn't sure what I'd be walking in on. I didn't know when or if Jake was coming back, and I had no clue how the other guys would respond to the evening's events.

I tiptoed through the main hall and stopped just outside the dining room doorway. I could hear both Rosalie and Emmett talking, but it was muffled. Phrases like, "nobody's fault," "brotherhood," "responsibility for one another" and "we're a team, we're here for each other" were clear.

Just as I was about to round the corner, I felt a hand on my shoulder. Jasper had caught me.

"Dude, look at your face!" he whispered.

"Shh!" I said, not wanting to be called out for eavesdropping. "What's going on?"

"Well," Jasper said, "Wanna be the first to know? I just got off the phone with Charlie."

"And?"

"Jake's gone. Charlie's going with him. He's on his way back to rehab."

**Thanks so much for reading! I love to hear your thoughts. The next chapter will be up in a week or two. =) **


	11. Chapter 11

**AN Giant thanks to my amazing beta, Robzbeanie – she's a super speedy, bread baking, beta machine, and I'm super grateful for all of her help. Big thanks also to my pre-reader CShepherd91 for being so wonderful! xoxo**

The shadows of the trees on my wall that night were reminding me of Bella. I thought one of them looked like her, then the wind shifted the branches and it looked more like a minotaur. I was clearly losing my mind.

After Jasper briefly announced that Charlie was escorting Jake back to rehab, everyone went back to their respective beds. Rosalie called an emergency group meeting for the next morning, and told us all to try and get some rest.

I tossed and turned, unable to shut off my brain. My face throbbed, but it wasn't nearly as distracting as the burn I felt after my kiss with Bella. I wanted to be able to bask in it, relive the moment and then some, but my mind just wouldn't let me. Flashes of Bella's warm mouth on mine were mixed in with the crazed look on Jake's face as he swore and swung at me. It was disturbing, and I needed to shut it all off.

Early the next morning, everyone gathered in the living room. We all clutched tightly to our coffee mugs – the entire group, with the exception of Bella, looked like shit. Despite the dark circles under her eyes, she was beautiful – at least to me. She'd sat a spot over from me in the circle, which at first I was bothered by, but then thought it was probably wise to not be so obvious. She caught my eye moments after sitting and shot me a big grin while her cheeks flushed pink. She then mouthed "Hey" at me, and all was well in my world.

Sam and Embry couldn't stop yawning. Quil's eyes were red and bloodshot – he looked like he'd barely slept at all. Jasper and Emmett were deep in a hushed discussion, while Rosalie fiddled with a clunky old phone on the coffee table in the middle of the room.

"Can you hear me?" Rosalie asked loudly, as the room quieted down. She had her blonde hair pulled back in a messy bun, and next to no makeup on – it was the least done up I'd ever seen her. She was still just as hot without all the fuss.

"Yes, Rose. Hello, guys." Charlie's rough voice came through the phone line loud and clear. A "Charlie's Angels" joke popped into my head, but I figured given the recent events it would've been inappropriate.

"I'm gonna give you all an update, then you can ask questions once I'm through. We clear?" Everyone replied with a "Yes, Sir" or an "uh-huh."

"Jake has been admitted to the inpatient rehab facility. He'll go through the detox process, just like he has before, and then will be living on site here."

"What the hell?" Quil yelled. "Living there?" he questioned as he jumped up. The expressions on everyone's faces were ones of surprise.

"Quil, son – I'm not finished," Charlie calmly replied. Sam grabbed Quil by the shoulder and wordlessly encouraged him to take a seat.

"Now, as I was saying, Jake won't be back for a long time, if it all. As of right now, he is a danger to himself and others. I had to pull some strings to get him sent here with no charges. This is a hard choice, but the best for everyone – Jake included." Charlie let out a deep sigh. The strong, confident tone he normally spoke in was gone. He sounded exhausted.

"With Jake gone, and it being a busy time of year, we're gonna have to shuffle everyone around to pick up the slack. I won't be back until late tonight, but Embry – you and I will be working the fields. Sam?"

"Yes, Sir?" he asked, leaning slightly towards the speaker.

"You're gonna stick with Quil."

"Already on that, Sir," Sam replied quietly.

"Edward and Jasper? You guys will be field relief, as well as odd jobs. All of this may change soon – Emmett will be posting your new schedules tonight."

I thought about that for a minute. Field relief was fine by me, but it meant odd hours – and odd hours meant less time with Bella.

"Dad – what about the horses? I thought we'd agreed that Edward would –"

"Bella –" Charlie stopped her. "It's just for now, until the harvest is done. Rosalie can help you over the next few days."

"But Dad, it's not just that. What about you? I don't think you should –"

"Bella!" Charlie boomed and then paused. "That is quite enough," he said quietly, quickly getting himself back together.

Bella tossed her hands in the air and shook her head incredulously at Emmett. He shrugged back at her. I could tell she was upset but was trying to hold it in. Her knees started bouncing and she chewed at her cuticles.

"As for this morning – I want you all to take care of yourselves. Enjoy some down time. After lunch, resume your schedules as usual. I'll see you all tonight."

As soon as the dial tone came over the speaker, the room came alive. Quil was ranting to Emmett and Sam – words like "idiot," "moron" and "selfish dick" were clear amongst the rabble. I felt bad for Quil – the kid was only sixteen and had already had to deal with one disappointment after another. Admirably, Sam seemed to have already stepped in where Jake left off.

I moved closer to Bella, who was filling Rosalie in on the stall cleaning schedule.

"Hey – this sucks," I said softly as I sat down beside Bella.

"Yeah, but I'll talk to Charlie," she said with a grin. "You were making good progress with Eclipse – I'll get ya back."

"I don't want to get you in trouble though. I mean, I'm here to do what Charlie says –"

"If you don't want to, Edward, you can just say so," Bella cut me off sharply and her face fell. She was hurt.

"No! That isn't what I meant at all – shit," I said, looking down at my feet. I needed to think carefully here. "Can't we, um, I don't know – find other things to do together?" I was willing to do whatever it would take to get closer to Bella – whatever would work was fine with me.

"You want to?" she asked nervously.

"Yes!" I replied, way too enthusiastically. "I mean, I do. Yeah. I definitely do."

Bella looked up at me slowly, the corners of her mouth pulling into a grin. "Ok – let's let things settle down a bit, then I'll come up with something, k?"

"Come up with what?" Emmett said jovially out of nowhere, as he clasped a giant arm around both Bella's and my shoulders. "You ready, Eddy? You're coming with me."

xoxoxoxoxoxo

Swan Crossing Jr./Sr. High School was a sight for sore eyes. Emmett and I had done a few errands – post office, bank, courthouse – to drop off papers and things, before we arrived at the dilapidated old building. Orange formica countertops, tiled yellow and brown floors – the place was in need of a major face lift. For what it lacked in aesthetics, however, it made up for in enthusiasm.

Emmett and I waited in the empty gymnasium for the guys to arrive. Plaques and banners hung high from the walls, the words "Go Geese Go!" were painted in large red and yellow letters along the far wall, and a case of trophies and medals sat tucked away near the entrance.

Emmett had explained to me on the way over that he coached the free sports program at the school. In addition to working for Charlie, he was employed by the school division. Having a certified teacher like Emmett on site at the Ranch meant more availability for grants and funding, and was also important for credibility. In addition to tutoring at the Ranch, Emmett taught the Jr./ Sr. Boys' Phys. Ed classes as a paid teacher and volunteered his time to the free program.

I'd never worked with teens before. I'd spent a little bit of time around my younger cousins, Jane and Alec, but they were under ten at the time. They were young, and they didn't particularly like me. I had a feeling that this experience would be much the same.

The kids started piling in to the gym shortly after we arrived. There were about 25 of them. Emmett had me help him set up different stations, each with different equipment – balls, racquets, nets, sticks, etc. There was plenty of selection – you'd never know it judging by the looks of the school itself.

The guys had all gathered around the thick black circle that was outlined on the gymnasium floor, like they'd done this a hundred times before. I expected them to be pains in my ass, but they were anything but. They were fairly quiet and patient, talking and laughing amongst themselves.

"Listen up, guys," Emmett called out as he sauntered his way to the middle of the circle. "Today, we're doing stations. I've got my buddy Edward here – he's helping me out today. Anyone gives him grief, and you'll be sitting out next practice, we clear?"

I watched the faces of the kids while Emmett gave instructions for the skills to be practiced at each station. They were in awe of him, eagerly soaking up the tips and tricks he was dishing out on top corner shots in hockey or three-point baskets for basketball.

I'd told Emmett a bit about my own high school sports days on the way to town – back in junior high, I was a star on the baseball team. Emmett thought it would be fun to place me with a glove at a pitching practice station. I was excited – even though I left out the part that come high school, I'd let the whole thing slip away, in favour of spending time with my buddies and screwing off – I was still eager to slip on a glove like old times.

A kid sitting on his own in the circle caught my attention. He had his head resting on his forearms on top of his bent knees. While most of the other kids had gym clothes, this guy stood out in his street clothes. The front of his jeans was dirty – not-washed-forever kind of dirty – and his black t-shirt was stretched out and faded. His dark hair was shaggy, falling in his eyes. He looked familiar, but all hunched over, I couldn't quite place him.

It wasn't until Emmett blew his whistle, signalling everyone to get up and spread out to the different stations, that I realized whom the withdrawn kid was. It was Jake's cousin – the guy we saw in the parking lot that day we stopped by the school when Quil got in all that trouble. Seth.

I watched Seth as he staggered over to the throwing station. He picked up the ball and tossed it back and forth in his hands.

"Hey," Emmett said quietly, sneaking up on me. "That's perfect – I want you with him, ok?" He pointed at Seth. I gave Emmett a 'thumbs up' and made my way over to Seth.

"Hey, I'm Edward," I introduced myself, not sure how else to break the ice. Seth looked up at me and nodded, as he continued to toss the ball back and forth. The kid had big hands, but was lanky. He clearly still had a lot of filling out to do. "I'll put on the glove."

"Jake told me about you," he mumbled as he backed away from me, making space between us for a decent throw. _Awesome_, I thought. _Just awesome_.

"Did he tell you I was an asshole?" I smirked at him, hoping to lighten things up a bit.

"Shh, dude, you can't say asshole here –" he nervously replied, though he was showing signs of a grin. "And no, he didn't. Why?" he asked. "Are you one?"

"I was. I'm trying to fix that though," I answered honestly.

"Jake's the asshole," Seth muttered. He held the ball up and cocked his arm back. I held out my glove to receive his throw, and just about shit when the ball blazed into my fist.

"Holy crap, kid!" I yelled. "Where the hell did you learn to throw like that?"

Seth shrugged at me, unimpressed by his power and strength.

"Do that again," I directed, tossing the ball back to him. Just like the first time, the ball landed tightly in my glove with a firm, and slightly painful, "thwap."

"Wow, man. That's something," I chuckled, dramatically shaking my fist out. Seth rolled his eyes at me. He looked embarrassed, but he was still smiling.

"So, you know about Jake then?" I asked. I figured he must, if he was referring to him as an asshole.

"Yeah, Sam called this morning. Woke up my foster mom. That's never good," Seth replied, winding up for another pass.

"I don't know if I'd call Jake an ass – I mean, a jerk – though," I said, carefully choosing my words. "He did some stupid things, but he's getting help, right?"

"Yeah, I guess . But if he did to my face what he did to yours, I'd still call him an asshole," he said firmly, looking around for Emmett. "This just sucks. I'm moving out there next month, after my birthday. I thought he'd be there."

After a few more minutes of tossing the ball around, Emmett gathered everyone for a basketball scrimmage. As I picked up equipment and sorted the balls on the sidelines, I took a moment to watch Emmett. He was laughing and hustling the guys, but setting them up for plays and opportunities. Hell, just by being here, he was giving them opportunities.

I thought about how Emmett had said that at one point in his life, he was a lot like me. Watching Emmett interact with the boys as a role model – a mentor – was giving me ideas. Big ones. I thought that maybe I'd be capable of similar things.

The idea got me excited – I'd look in to being a mentor, following Emmett's path. It felt good being there, knowing that we were making a difference for these kids, giving them a chance. I couldn't wait to get back to the Ranch to share my revelation with Bella – I'd phone Esme and Carlisle, too. I still needed details and stuff – to work out connections back home – but it was a start, and it felt incredible.

The rest of our time in the gym passed quickly. Seth and I stuck together, partnering up for the different stations after the scrimmage was done. We cracked jokes here and there, talked about music and sports. The kid was a natural athlete – strong, coordinated, quick. It was reassuring to know that he was moving to the Ranch soon. Although he showed a lot of athletic ability, I could tell that he was tired, stressed.

The drive back was filled with Emmett's typical blaring country tunes. Once we reached the edge of town, Emmett turned the volume way down.

"So – whatcha think?" he asked.

"I liked it – a lot," I replied sincerely.

"Oh yeah?" Emmett asked, looking surprised. "That's good."

"Umhm," I murmured. "This might be what I want to do."

"For the rest of your time here?" he asked, surprised.

"No, man. I mean with my life," I said, meaning every word. Emmett looked over at me and chuckled to himself.

"Wow, Eddy. That's huge. I guess my work here today is done."

xoxoxoxoxo

The next few days went by in a blur – at the halfway point of my stay harvesting was an around-the-clock business, made even busier by the loss of Jake. Repairs and maintenance of machinery now fell on Sam and Quil, so Charlie stepped in and helped with the other farming duties.

My time with Bella had been seriously limited yet again and it sucked. I'd pass her in the kitchen, and we made small talk, but it wasn't the contact time I was looking for. Now that I'd had a taste of her, I needed more. While I drove the combine, I thought of Bella. While I scooped out the chicken coop, I thought of Bella. Every night before bed, I thought of Bella – hell, especially then. Did I ever.

The harvest was drawing to an end, which was good as the weather was noticeably getting colder by the day. I had yet to see any snow, but the ever-present breeze was getting cooler – a t-shirt and jeans were no longer enough clothing if I was going to be outside for any length of time.

It was to my surprise, and relief, that when I woke late in the week and glanced at my schedule, a big chunk of time marked "Oil Changes" was crossed off, and "Riding w/ Bella" had replaced it.

After lunch I quickly washed and freshened up before I went out to meet Bella. I also put on a pair of boxer briefs, taking Bella's advice from last time. The last thing I needed was damaged balls.

She was waiting outside the main house for me with Eclipse and another black horse that I had never seen up close before. I was still a little unsure about the whole horseback riding thing, but if it meant time alone with Bella, I'd take it, complaint free.

"You ready?" Bella asked. She had a smile on her face, but it seemed forced. Her arms were crossed across her chest, and she made no effort to get closer to me. Something was definitely off.

"Yeah – thanks for arranging this. I've been wanting to see you," I said, hoping to crack through the wall she was putting up.

"Don't worry about it. These girls haven't been out enough lately. We should go," she replied abruptly, as she thrust Eclipse's reins in my direction. "I'm taking Luna – she's a little wild."

We saddled up mostly in silence. Bella said very little to me – the only words spoken were brief instructions. Bella's cold shoulder was making me nervous, and as Eclipse fidgeted beneath me, I couldn't help but wonder if she really could feel the tension, too.

I was confused – the last I had checked, things were going so well with Bella. She'd shared with me the best kiss of my life, and though things had been crazy and busy around the Ranch, we'd still kept our exchanges light. I thought she'd been on the same page as me, but now I wasn't so sure. I told myself that as soon as the opportunity presented itself, I'd ask her what the hell was going on.

Bella skilfully worked with Luna as we rode down the treeline on the property. The magnificent horse would struggle at the reins, attempting to take Bella in the opposite direction, but Bella handled her smoothly, keeping calm and collected. If it had been me, I would've bailed right the hell off her back.

After riding for a while, still in silence, my thighs were starting to ache, but it wasn't nearly as uncomfortable as the growing tension between Bella and me. Bella and Luna stopped short on the edge of a hill, looking out over the valley. Mustering up all the courage I had in me, I rode Eclipse right up next to her.

"Bella, what the hell?" I asked softly. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No," she chuckled to herself. I clearly missed the joke. "You've done everything right."

"Then why are you being like this? You have to know how much I like you –" I was baring it all, and I couldn't stop myself. My nerves were shot and I couldn't hold back.

"Look – we've gotta talk about things. I don't know –"

"What if I told you I liked you more than, like, a friend?" I said hesitantly, pulling gently on my reins, moving closer still and effectively cutting her off. Bella's eyes widened as she looked at me thoughtfully.

"How do I know you're not just thinking that this is convenient, Edward? You've only got a few weeks left. Let's be serious. I –"

"I've never been more serious about anything in my life. I'm not just screwing around!" I yelled. I knew I sounded wounded – I couldn't hide it. Bella was different – my feelings were completely sincere, and I desperately needed her to know that.

"I just can't get hurt," Bella sighed, her voice small. "After everything – I just can't."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"I know – but what happens next, Edward? I've been thinking about this all week! What do we do now? When you leave?"

"Well –" I sighed. "I've thought about it, too." I had, countless times. I'd run every possible option I could think of through my head while in my room at night. "Just because I'm leaving doesn't mean we can't keep in touch, visit and stuff."

"I know that. I just don't want to get any further into this if –"

"Look, Bella –" I stopped her. "If you can honestly tell me that at the end of my time here – if we just stopped this now – that you wouldn't regret it, I'll leave you alone," I said sharply, running my hands through my hair in frustration. Bella hopped off her horse, refusing to acknowledge me or meet my eyes. I followed right behind her, swinging my leg over and off of Eclipse. I didn't know what I'd do if this was it.

Bella made her way to the opposite edge of the hill and I followed right behind her. I watched as she gathered her long hair over one shoulder and wiped quickly at her eyes. She turned around to me slowly.

"I'd regret it," she almost whispered. Her eyes were watery and her chin was quivering slightly. Seeing her that way hurt me – I needed to fix it.

"Hey –" I soothed, opening my arms up to her. "We'll be fine, k?" Bella folded into me, nodding her head against my chest. It felt so good to just hold her. I pressed one hand tightly against the small of her back, holding her firmly against me, and kissed the top of her head. A few moments passed before Bella gently pulled away.

"There is a bit of a problem, though," Bella began nervously. I gave her a curious look, and she giggled.

"It's nothing really big, just, um – maybe we shouldn't tell Charlie. Let's just keep things between us for now, ok?"

I was more than happy to agree with that. I could only imagine feeling the wrath of Charlie if he knew that I was necking with his daughter in the woods. Well, at least that I planned to be necking with his daughter in the woods.

"Ok, that's cool – for now, we'll keep it quiet," I replied.

"Thanks, Edward. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to get all upset," she said.

"No – don't you apologize for anything. I'm glad we got all this out."

The rest of our ride was much more pleasant. I shared with Bella my experience at the school, and she was both shocked that I'd enjoyed it and proud that I'd thought of some ideas for my future. Bella filled me in on the upcoming winter – as hard as I tried, I couldn't even imagine the cold she was describing. The light conversation was easy, never forced. Being around Bella felt so normal and natural – it was hard to believe that we'd almost let it all go.

I helped Bella give the horses a good, thorough brushing and lead them back to their stalls in the barn. Just as we were about to head in to prepare for dinner, Bella stopped me.

"Hey – I got some good news! I can't believe I forgot to tell you!" she said, excitement all over her face.

"What's that?" I asked, taking her hands in mine and lacing our fingers together. I pulled her closer to me, our faces mere inches apart.

"Remember that camping trip I'd talked about?"

"Yeah?" I nodded. I had kind of thought that with the recent drama around the Ranch that it would get pushed aside.

"Well, Charlie agreed that we could go if all the crops got up in time. It has to be on the property, and we're only able to do it if Emmett agreed to supervise..."

"Did he?" I asked, hopeful.

"Yeah," she chuckled. "I had to bribe him with three of our Gran's sugar pies, but yes. He's gonna come along."

Rather than convey my excitement with words, I slid my hands up Bella's back and around her ribs, then cupped her jaw in my hands. Our lips met moments later, a hint of strawberry lip gloss or some other fruit just barely noticeable on hers.

Bella leaned firmly up against my chest, her legs mixed amongst mine, as her hand snaked up my neck into my hair. Her tongue sought out my mouth first, lightly tracing my bottom lip. I was sure she could feel how into it – into her – I was, but I didn't care. I wanted her to know what she did to me.

I deepened our kiss as her soft mouth melted with mine. My fingers trailed up her sides, stopping at the edge of the wire and fabric I could feel beneath her thin shirt. Bella's lips broke from mine first with a sigh, and I gently ran my mouth along her jaw line.

When I reached the tender spot just behind her ear, Bella let out a soft and lusty "Mmm," and much to my body's dismay, I pulled back.

"Bella, God, um –" I swallowed hard, trying to get a hold of myself. "We should go in."

"Yeah," she answered with a grin, as she reached up on her tiptoes and kissed me chastely once more. "I'll meet you there."

xoxoxoxo

After I'd cooled down for a few minutes, I headed in to help Bella with dinner. Bella had placed a ham in the giant slow cooker earlier in the day, so we didn't have much to prepare. The conversation at the supper table was light and easy – rather than sitting in silence and stuffing ourselves, we caught up on the highlights of each other's days.

Charlie and Embry reported that the harvesting was very near completion, and Sam and Quil had gotten the old pickup running again. Bella did most of the talking for us – she excitedly explained to the group how I'd gotten over my horse fear, as the guys – even Charlie – laughed their asses off to her animated tale of me jumping out of the way like a coward when Eclipse sneezed.

After dinner I retired to my room to get caught up on my journaling. I was due to meet with Rosalie the next morning, and I had plenty written that I was looking forward to sharing, but I wanted to be sure everything was up to date.

Once I wrapped up my journal, I hit the bathroom and washed up. On my way back to bed, I noticed Jasper's door propped open slightly, his reading lamp still on. He'd been the only one missing from dinner, and it wasn't really discussed. Rosalie had only briefly mentioned that he wasn't feeling well.

"Jasper?" I called out, wondering if he'd just passed out with the light on.

"Yeah –" he coughed out. He sounded rough. "I can't really talk right now," he replied, his voice sounding far away.

"Do you need anything, man?" I asked.

"No, I'm good," he said hurriedly, "Just want to be alone."

"Ok, do you want me to –"

"No!" he yelled. "Just–- no, Edward. Please. I'll talk to you tomorrow," he choked out. I could have sworn he was holding back a sob.

"Alright, man," I said gently. "If you need me, I'm just across the hall."

As I stripped off my sweats and climbed into bed, I couldn't help but wonder what the hell was up with Jasper. Something was seriously off, but I'd have to wait to find out. I decided that I'd bring up my concerns to Rosalie in the morning.

I closed my eyes, and tried to focus on the sound of the wind howling to ease me to sleep. Just as I started drifting off, a staggered "Tap-Tap" sound on my window startled me awake.

I foggily climbed back out of bed, turned my lamp on and made my way to the window to check it out.

Sure enough, there on the lawn, illuminated by the bright yard light, was a rubber boot and sweater-clad Bella fisting a handful of pebbles.

She waved frantically up at me, her whole face lighting up. She looked adorable. Silly, but adorable. I waved back at her and held my arms out, palms up at my side, as if to ask her, "What the hell are you doing here?"

She motioned back at me, pointing with both index fingers to her chest and mouthing "My." She then steepled her hands above her head, and mouthed out "House." I resisted the impulse to screw with her and act confused – in my groggy state it took a minute to digest just what Bella was asking of me.

The thought of Charlie catching me sneaking out to Bella's crossed my mind for a split second – but was quickly replaced by the idea that it would definitely be worth it. Before I could think it through any harder, I held up both my palms to Bella to indicate "10 minutes," threw on my pants and a hoodie, and was slipping down the staircase in no time flat.

**Thanks so much for reading and for your reviews – I always love to hear your thoughts, and do my best to respond to everyone! Thanks to singlegrlmusing for suggesting sugar pie as the dessert Bella has to make for Emmett. Next chapter will be up in a week or two! xoxo**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N Huge thanks to my speedy and wonderful beta, Robzbeanie and my awesome prereader CShepherd 91. You ladies are the greatest! =)**

I was a trembling mix of nervousness and excitement. My hands shook on the doorknob as I left my room, and I could've sworn the banister on the stairs was vibrating beneath my palm. I tiptoed carefully down the staircase – the brain in my pants urged me to break into a full-fledged run to Bella's, but I resisted.

If I got caught, I'd be in huge shit. I had snuck out of Carlisle and Esme's plenty, so I was good at it, but the consequences had never been as they were here. After all the progress I'd been making, the last thing I needed was a setback.

I carefully lowered myself off the final step, the old wood shifting and creaking audibly beneath my feet. I quickly took the few strides to the main door, and slowly turned the crank on the deadbolt. My shaky hands grabbed the lower handle, smooth and firm, trying to eliminate as much noise as possible.

Just as the handle clicked into place, a heavy hand clamped down on my shoulder, sending me jolting out of my skin.

"Edward – what the hell are you doing?"

Standing there, a reheated plate of dinner balanced in his other hand, was Jasper. He looked rough – his hair was greasy, his eyes were red-rimmed and tired.

"Holy shit, dude!" I whisper-yelled at him. "I'm going to Bella's, you fucking scared me. You always run around here in the dark?"

"Sorry, man – I was hungry. You aren't leaving the property, are you?" he asked, worry written all over his face. He looked like a kid who had just lost his puppy – I immediately felt bad for laying into him.

"No man, just her cabin."

"Ok then – get out of here. You better make this count, eh? Cause if Charlie catches you…"

"I know. I'm on it."

"Night, dude. You lucky little shit," he said quietly, as he headed for the stairs.

I pried the door open carefully and made a mad dash for the treeline. The large spotlight in the yard cast just enough light for me to make out the start of the path through the woods.

Though my heart was racing and my palms were sweating, my cheeks and nose were frozen. Bella's cabin wasn't all that far from the main house, but far enough that my eyes were watering and my fingertips were numb. The wind packed a bite – winter was definitely fast approaching.

Relief washed over me as I hopped up Bella's front steps. A lamp just inside the window cast a yellow glow through her sheer curtains. I could see her shadow flitting around inside.

I softly knocked with the back of my knuckles as I pushed the door open a crack, knowing Bella was expecting me. She was standing at the stove, casually stirring at a pot. She looked over her shoulder at me, and smiled wide.

"Hey. You actually made it!" she beamed. She looked adorable – her boots had been kicked off just inside the door and were replaced with fuzzy wool slippers. Her heavy sweater was ditched on the edge of the couch, and she was left in a pair of leggings and a tight-fitting tank.

"Yeah – it wasn't too bad. Jasper just about gave me a heart attack, though," I chuckled as I stepped inside, making double sure that the door was locked behind me.

I noticed a few candles scattered around, and that Bella had started a fire. I was relieved – as the warmth hit them, my cheeks and fingers started painfully tingling.

"Aww, You look frozen! It's cold, eh?" Bella said sympathetically, grabbing two mugs from the cupboard.

"Not too bad," I said, as I rubbed my hands together vigorously. I didn't want Bella thinking I was a pussy.

"Well, I'm making us hot cocoa. Get comfy – it's almost done."

I picked a spot on the end of her couch, right next to a coffee table full of picture frames. I'd already peeked at the pictures on her shelf before the dance, but these I had yet to see.

It was clear to me that Bella's family and friends meant a lot to her. She was surrounded by memories. There was a picture of a younger Bella and Charlie surrounded by Mounties and beautiful horses – the description on the bottom of the frame read "RCMP Musical Ride – 2000." An action shot of Emmett, cowboy hat tucked under one hand while he was being bucked off the back of a raging bull, made me chuckle out loud.

I picked up a picture in the back that caught my eye. A lady in a long, flowing sundress and big floppy hat was standing with her hand on Bella's shoulder. Their long dark hair and deep brown eyes were too similar to be anything but mother and daughter.

Just as I brought the frame up to take a closer look, Bella sat down next to me and placed two steaming mugs of cocoa topped with mini marshmallows on the coffee table in front of us.

"That's Renee, my mom," she said, tucking her feet up under herself and curling closer to my side.

"You guys look a lot alike," I replied, studying the picture closely. The background was desert-like – lots of sand and there was a cactus just to the right of Bella.

"Yeah, but that's about where the similarities end," Bella sighed, peering at the picture between us. "We get along and all, but we're completely different. Renee likes to dress up, put on a big show, keep up appearances. It's just not my style. I've always been tighter with Charlie."

"That's good though. You guys like all the same horse stuff and all, it makes sense," I replied, as I ran my thumb down the length of Bella behind the glass. Bella suddenly reached over and snatched the frame from me.

"This still isn't fair, you know," she said with a grin. "You get to see all of these – and I get nothing!"

"Not true," I replied softly, as I reached for my wallet in my pocket. I'd been wanting to share with her the picture I had stashed away. I never really shared it with anyone, but with Bella, I wanted her to know things about me – about my family.

I opened up my wallet and pulled the weathered folded square from inside. I had plenty of other pictures back at Esme and Carlisle's, but this one was special.

I carefully unfolded the picture, and without looking at it, passed it over to Bella. She took it gently in her fingers and brought it close to her face. I watched her reaction closely – as her eyes scanned it, her teeth bit down on her bottom lip and her eyebrows furrowed. She looked up at me with watery eyes before placing it down gently on my thigh.

"Oh, Edward," she sniffed, "That's just– "

"Hey!" I said, as I wrapped my fingers around her knee and gave her a little shake. "None of this!" I motioned with my other hand to her eyes.

"I'm sorry. It's beautiful though. That's your mom, right?" she sniffed.

"It is. Her name was Liz," I said softly, as I picked up the picture to take a closer look. The photograph was of the two of us – I was six or so. I wasn't sure where it was taken or who even took it, but my mother and I were on the edge of a cliff – her down on one knee, me perched on her other. The colours on the horizon told me that the sun was setting, and there was a breeze – her long auburn hair was blown up all around us.

My mom had her finger pointed up to the sky as if she was showing me something, and I was staring at her, a wide relaxed smile on my face.

As I traced my thumb along the distressed outline of the picture, I could feel Bella's stare on me. I didn't want her to pity me, but I wanted to be open with her. I needed her to know – to get it out. I started before I could really think my words through.

"In the first few years after she passed, I was pretty confused. I found this picture when my therapist made me do a collage. Esme helped. I used to tell myself that this picture was my mom telling me where she would be."

"That's so sweet," Bella said, resting her head against my shoulder as her fingers gripped onto my bicep and squeezed. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked hesitantly.

"About my mom? Not really, to be honest, but I want you to know. I want you to know everything about me."

"Ok," she said softly.

"Well, she was hit by a drunk driver. Died at the scene. I never knew my dad, and custody was granted to Carlisle and Esme. I barely knew them either, to be honest."

"Really? They are your aunt and uncle though, right?" she asked, shocked.

"Yeah, but they weren't close with my mom at all. My mom was pretty different. She marched to the beat of her own drum, ya know? She worked different random jobs, never settled down – we lived all over the place. She didn't make me follow a schedule, do any chores. Everything was always scattered and crazy."

"Sounds like something most kids would dream about!" Bella said with a smile.

"Yeah, but it wasn't always what it seemed. She'd forget important things – I'd be late to everything. I loved her, I did – but even as a kid I knew something wasn't really right. She was more like a friend than a mom."

"I can relate to that," Bella said softly. "She sounds a lot like Renee."

"Yeah – Esme always called her 'flighty.' It fit. So you can imagine how well it went when I moved in with the Cullens."

"They were stricter?"

"Things were so different. They had rules, and three meals a day at the table, and I had to go to school – get this – ALL THE TIME!" I chuckled. I felt myself start to relax, realizing how easy it was to share my story with Bella this way.

"It must have been really hard to change like that, though. Especially after losing your only parent," Bella said, as she ran her fingers softly back and forth across my forearm.

"It was, and I totally resisted it. Up until coming here, I still was resisting it. Rose and I have talked a bit though – she thinks I probably felt that by following Carlisle and Esme's ways that I was cheating on my mom."

"Do you think that?" she asked.

"You know, I think I do. Rose makes a lot of sense. That's what your old man is paying her the big bucks for, right?" I teased. Bella laughed, and the mood in the room lightened.

I leaned forward, grabbing my forgotten mug of cocoa from the table and passing Bella's to her. The warm chocolate drink was thick, creamy and perfectly sweet. I watched with great interest as Bella's lips wrapped around her mug and quickly sucked a melted mini marshmallow into her mouth.

"Jasper won't say anything to Charlie, will he?" I asked. I was pretty confident that he wouldn't, but I wanted to see if I needed to bribe his ass somehow when I got back.

"No, I don't think so. He seems to really like you – I don't think he'd want to jeopardize that. He doesn't make friends very easily," Bella replied.

"Good. I can't imagine this would go over well with the boss man," I replied, taking another swig of my cocoa.

As I lowered my glass, I could feel Bella shaking slightly beside me.

"You ok?" I asked.

"You have foam on your lip." She snorted and then burst out in laughter.

"Oh, I do, do I?" I deadpanned, as I took another sip and purposely coated my upper lip with the chocolatey foam. Bella broke out in another round of giggles, then turned away from me as she took a big sip from her cup. When she turned back to face me, her upper lip matched mine.

"Is there something on my face?" she giggled, unable to keep a straight face. She was ridiculously adorable, and before I had time to process it, I leapt over and tackled her, going straight for her ribs. She had told me at the dance that her ribs were really ticklish – so I closed in on her weakness.

"Edward! Stop! Please! I'm gonna pee!" she giggled as she squirmed on her side, trying to get out from under my hands. I let her go briefly, expecting Bella to jump up and run for the washroom, but instead, she launched herself at me, landing right across my lap, her back against the arm rest of the couch.

I was surprised by her new proximity to me, but was even more shocked when she looked me right in the eyes, stuck the tip of her tongue out just a sliver between her chocolate-topped lips, and slowly licked the chocolate right from my face.

"Mmm…you've got a yummy moustache." She pulled back slowly and grinned at me. I couldn't believe the balls she had – that little move was both confident and sexy, and I had to shift Bella slightly to hide the part of me coming alive in my pants.

I'd been wanting to kiss her, to hold her and touch her all night, so I used the opportunity to pounce.

"Pretty girls like you shouldn't have a moustache," I groaned out as I cradled her face in my hand, pulling her gently to me. As soon as she was close enough, I traced my tongue along the length of her top lip, matching the motions she made on me moments before.

Just as I reached the corner of her mouth, Bella's lips responded to me, her mouth parting, her tongue gently meeting mine. For several moments, we moved together, deepening our kiss, our breathing getting heavier, our lips growing more and more urgent.

Bella pulled back first, with a gentle sigh. I thought she was getting up, but she surprised me yet again as she swung her legs around and straddled my lap, facing me. I let my eyes wander, taking in the gentle curves of her hips, her tapered waist below her thin cotton tank. My hands found their way to her ribs, and they stroked gentle tiny circles, from her hips up to the edge of her bra.

All the while, Bella stared at me with a lazy smile, her teeth biting gently into her bottom lip.

"God, Bella. You're beautiful," I said, as she giggled, her cheeks flushing a rosy pink. Her arms crossed over her waist, and she grabbed the edge of her tank top between her fingers.

"Should I?" she asked, as she lifted it slightly, exposing an inch or so of soft, smooth skin on her belly. My fingers were instantly drawn there, and I brushed the backs of my knuckles delicately across the exposed skin.

I swallowed thickly and nodded. If Bella shifted even an inch closer to me, she would have known how strongly my body was reacting to her. The sweatpants I was wearing left very little to the imagination. Every night before bed, I imagined Bella in various states of undress. The idea that she was really here, wanting to show me more of her, was leaving me at a loss for words.

Her fingers made quick work of her top – in one swift movement it was up and over her head and she was left in a soft, pink cotton bra. I couldn't peel my eyes from her chest – through the thin cotton I could make out the outline of her tightened nipples, straining against the fabric. The desire to rip the thing off and attach myself to her was strong, but I managed to resist.

Bella tossed her shirt to the floor behind her and gathered her hair to one side over her shoulder. Her eyes met mine for a brief moment, though she looked away quickly, seeming embarrassed. I took that as my cue to help her relax, and pulled her gently to me, my lips finding the spot on her throat just behind her ear that had elicited a big reaction from her in the barn.

As I ran my lips and tongue along the sensitive spot, Bella's soft sighs and moans let me know she was growing more and more comfortable. I snaked a hand between us, my fingers trailing their way up past Bella's belly button and over the soft skin between her breasts. I cupped her fully in my palm, and was rewarded with a lusty sigh from Bella that caused a roar in my groin.

"Oh wow, Edward," Bella sighed, as she quickly brought her mouth up to mine, her lips crashing into me, urgent and intense. She shifted herself closer, and I couldn't help the deep groan that escaped as her inner thigh brushed against my erection. Rather than move away, Bella responded to me by lining her hips up with mine and pressing firmly, our bodies separated only by her thin leggings and my sweats.

At that moment, the temperature in the room increased an easy ten degrees. My head was foggy and spinning – the only thing I could think of was the feel of Bella's hips pressing circles into me, which I matched over and over. It felt like so long since I'd been with someone – and even then, it was never like this. I was minutes from coming unglued, and my dick was still in my pants. It was incredible.

I was so caught up in our movements that I barely noticed that Bella's hand had slipped from my shoulder down to the stretchy waistband of my pants, where her fingers trailed back and forth, tickling my treasure trail. She broke our kiss apart and looked me in the eye, asking me for silent permission.

"You don't have to," I said softly, not wanting her to feel pressured. I wanted her, oh my God, did I ever – but I wasn't about to make her feel like we had to do more. I cared too much about her to do that. She wasn't just some other girl, and I couldn't just think with my dick. Bella deserved more.

"I know. I want to," she replied with an easy smile. Her hand trailed lower, beneath my pants, and under the waistband of my boxers. I lifted myself up, tugging my pants down, my cock springing free from its confines. I couldn't believe that this was actually happening.

Bella's fingers wrapped tightly around me, and I gasped deeply, nearly losing myself right then and there. She started pumping her fist, slowly at first but gaining speed, her wrist making a tiny swirl with each pass. My hands started shaking, my body clenched tight, as I desperately tried to hold off my release. The last thing I needed was for Bella to think I was a minute man.

Mere moments later, I was breathing heavily, my head tipped back against the couch, eyes closed tightly. Bella had increased both her speed and pressure, and had worked me almost to the brink.

I heard a soft moan come from Bella, and forced my eyes open to watch her. She was watching her hand on me, once again biting that lip, the fingers on her free hand tracing and brushing against her breast and circling her nipple. She was so damn sexy, and the fact that she didn't realize it made her even sexier.

The pressure inside me was growing at an uncontrollable rate, and as Bella picked up her speed I knew there was no turning back.

"Oh God, Bella. I'm gonna– " I groaned, unable to continue as I burst apart – my orgasm overwhelmingly strong. I shielded both myself and Bella with my hand, catching my release in an attempt to contain any mess.

I tipped my head back and took a deep breath, realizing that I'd have to get up very soon, but not wanting to move in the slightest. A little giggle from Bella snapped me out of my daze.

"Oh my God, Bella – that was just…" I trailed off.

"Awesome?" she said with a cheeky grin.

"Yes. I'm sorry though, it was way too–"

"Hey!" she snapped, cutting me off. "None of that. Let's just enjoy this, k?" she smiled at me as she handed me a tissue from a box on the coffee table.

"Ok," I said, as I pulled her close and planted a kiss on the top of her head. "But I owe you."

"Fine," she chuckled. "Make me up an i.o.u. Now go get cleaned up – you should probably head back soon."

After I washed up and said my goodbyes to Bella, I hurried back as quickly as I could to the main house. The temperature had dropped at least another few degrees, and I was certain I would wake everyone in the house with my chattering teeth.

Once I climbed back into bed, I was almost instantly asleep. Since I'd arrived at the Ranch, I'd gotten used to the early to bed, early to rise schedule. I knew that I'd be paying for my lack of sleep the next morning, but it would be completely worth it.

The next morning, with dreary eyes I made my way to breakfast on time, then headed out to feed the chickens before my meeting with Rose. I passed Jasper on the way – he waggled his eyebrows suggestively at me but didn't mention a thing. He also informed me that Bella had already gone to town to pick up some antibiotics for one of the horses without me even having to ask. He was a good friend like that.

My meeting with Rose was relatively uneventful. I shared with her my discussion with Bella about my mom – leaving out the time and location of that discussion, of course. I had shared with Rose that Bella and I had become quite close, but left out any romantic feelings. Even though things between Rose and me during therapy were kept confidential, I still wasn't comfortable revealing our relationship without Bella's consent.

The majority of our meeting was spent talking about what Rose called my "Action Plan." Basically, it was an outline of changes I was going to make once I arrived back home. It included searching for a volunteer position at a middle or high school, enrolling in courses for the fall semester at the local community college, and finding a hobby – a sport, music, whatever – that I could take part in regularly to start building new friendships. The details of the plan were starting to come together, but I was hesitant. I didn't want to think too far ahead – I wanted my mind focused on my time left with Bella.

After briefly discussing my concerns about Jasper – which Rose thanked me for bringing up and took note of, before explaining that Jasper experiences ups and downs all the time – I headed inside for a quick snack before I got started on my afternoon chores. Sam, Embry and I were responsible for moving cattle to a new pasture, and I was told it would take up most of the remaining daylight.

Halfway through one of Bella's famous muffins, Charlie hollered out my name from his office. I approached his doorway before replying back.

"Can I help you, Sir?" I asked. Charlie was sitting in his large desk chair, piles of paperwork and files stacked neatly around him. An old radio in the corner was crackling out country tunes.

"You got a minute there, boy? You and I need to have a chat."

My stomach leapt up into my chest, as I immediately braced for the worst.

"Sure, Sir. I've got time before we move the cattle," I replied, as I made my way closer to the desk and anxiously awaited Charlie's next words. He gestured at the chair for me to take a seat.

"You look nervous there, boy. Is there something you're not telling me?" Charlie asked, his eyebrow arched high on his forehead, his stare boring into me.

"Um, no, Sir," I quickly replied, clasping my hands together to keep from fidgeting.

"Well, good then. You know you're at your halfway point, yes?" Charlie asked, his demeanour lightening considerably.

"I do, Sir. Me and Rosalie are working on my Action Plan," I replied.

Charlie nodded, thinking to himself for a moment.

"I spoke to your aunt and uncle today, Edward. Reported on your progress here. All good news, I'll have you know. They're very proud of you."

"That's good," I said, feeling pretty pleased that Charlie had good things to say about me. "Carlisle told me I was supposed to ask you about how you two know each other?" I remembered, thinking this was a perfect opportunity.

Charlie pushed back his chair and got up from his desk – his shit kickers making a deep click along the floor with each step. He opened a door on his filing cabinet and shuffled some papers around. He pulled one from the stack and held it out to me.

"Who's this?" I asked. The picture was old – black and white, and faded considerably. There were a handful of young men, all with matching haircuts, crowded around a tractor.

"Second from the left? That's me. Third from the right? Your uncle Carlisle," Charlie replied, as he made his way back to his chair and stretched out.

"Wow," I said, examining the picture closely. "Where was this?"

Charlie chuckled and scrubbed his hands along his face. "That was here."

I looked up at him, surprise all over my face.

"Long ago, this place was run by the Volturi family. They left the area many, many years ago. Things were a lot different then – if you guys think I'm strict, you should have seen the Ranch back in those days. They used the strap, shaved our heads, kept us all in line."

"That's crazy," I replied, and handed the picture over to Charlie. He looked upon it thoughtfully.

"It was called 'The Volturi Home for Wayward Boys.' Although they were strict, they were good people. They closed the doors when Aro Volturi passed away and sold the place out to some farmers. I bought it after that, and made it what it is now."

"So you and Carlisle lived here together?" I asked again, to be certain.

"We did – him in the green room, me in the red. We kept in touch throughout the years – letters, phone calls. Carlisle actually helped me out a lot when I was working with the Aboriginal community on creating a program that would work with them. Funding, cultural components – your uncle is a very wise man."

I nodded, agreeing that Carlisle was indeed wise, and feeling a little ashamed that I was so caught up in my own business that I had never thought to even ask Carlisle how he was connected here.

"Most of the kids that walk through these doors do so based on government grants and funding. Your uncle Carlisle paid for your entire stay upfront, as well as contributed a sizeable donation."

"I didn't realize that," I said quietly.

"You know, Edward, you're lucky in many ways," Charlie began, as he tugged on his moustache like he often did while deep in thought. "Your uncle had a rough start in life, but he never let that get him down. Look at his success, how he does well by others. You've got the perfect, willing role model waiting for you back home. You just got to let him lead you."

"I know that now, Sir."

"I'm glad, son. Now – what's this Bella tells me about a camping trip? I would like to think that I don't have to tell you this, but I'm going to anyway, just so we're clear. Alright?" Charlie barked, the no-nonsense look back on his face.

"Of course, Sir," I replied nervously.

"You listen to Emmett. You stick together as a group. And there will be no funny business, you hear me?" Charlie snapped, punctuating each guideline with a slam of his finger to his desk.

"I understand, Sir. No funny business."

"Good, then. If you guys get everything done today, you'll be leaving tomorrow afternoon – it works best for everyone's schedules. Have fun, son, but remember– "

"No funny business," I cut him off, with a nervous smile.

"That's right, boy–– no funny business."

**A/N Despite massive computer fail (lap top is dead – AHH!), I worked really hard to get this to you guys without going over my week-two week timeframe. Think I did ok! Thanks so much for reading, reviewing and rec'ing. I always love to hear your thoughts! xoxo**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N Special thanks, as always, to my wonderful beta Robzbeanie, and my fabulous prereader CShepherd91. You guys are the best! xoxo**

Packing up Emmett's truck was a lot more work than I had expected it to be. There were several rolls of blankets and foam pads, rolled up like giant cinnamon buns and wrapped tightly with bungee cords, three coolers that each weighed a ton, and a whole bunch of boxes filled to the top with pots, dishes, snacks and other gear. Bella and Jasper had been in charge of the preparations, and they clearly did a thorough job. Looking at the load we were bringing, you would have guessed we were going for a week.

"You got all your warmest stuff, Eddie?" Emmett shouted out at me from the cab of his truck. "It'll get down close to freezing tonight."

"Yeah – I've got it all," I grunted as I thrust the last of the heavy boxes into the truck bed. Jasper had given me the rundown on what I would need, and I could feel in the air that it would all be coming in handy.

Frost was starting to cover the ground every morning when I woke for chores. There was an almost constant frozen breeze in the air now that would chill you to the core if you weren't dressed properly in warm layers. I often wondered how these guys could stand it – Seattle had wet and miserable weather, but the cold was nothing like this, and winter hadn't even officially arrived yet.

"What about Rosalie? She's not coming?" I asked. So far all of the guys, including Emmett, were coming along in addition to Bella and Alice. Jasper hadn't said anything when Bella told him Alice was coming, but the stupid grin he wore on his face told us all we needed to know. After watching him go through a few days of being down and out, it was a relief to see him with a smile on his face.

"Rosie? Ha!" Emmett chuckled. "No way, man. My Rosie doesn't camp – at all. She likes indoor plumbing. And mirrors. And her feather duvet," he added, laughing to himself.

I shook my head at him and snickered. Rose was the always well put together, manicured type. It made sense that camping wouldn't be her idea of a good time.

Moments after I shut the tailgate, Sam and Embry showed up – a long red canoe balanced over their heads. We strapped the red one, and another green one just like it, to the top of Emmett's truck. The guys then took off ahead, saying they were going to grab Quil and the quads and clear out a good spot close to the creek on the edge of the property line. Sam had explained that the Ranch property borders the edge of a National Park that has a large lake – excellent for canoeing and fishing. They made arrangements with Emmett for where to find them, and headed off.

Not more than a half hour later, we were piled in Emmett's truck, surrounded by gear, heading down a rough and bumpy path through the treeline that had obviously been used for this sort of thing before. Emmett got all giddy when he got to put his truck in 4X4 to tackle the rough terrain.

The trees were quickly losing their leaves, but those that remained were breathtaking hues of reds, oranges and yellows. The hilly valley we were making our way down was filled with heavy fog, and you could see a winding stream twisting through the trees below in the distance.

Bella had hopped in beside me in the back, placing Alice's bags and bedding on the seat beside her, claiming there was no room for her things in the back. That conveniently left Alice sandwiched next to Jasper in the front seat. When Jasper caught on to Bella's antics, the look he gave her was priceless – part "I'm going to kill you," part "Holy shit, thank you."

Sitting in the backseat and having Bella in such close quarters felt perfect and right. What wasn't so perfect was the fact that Emmett was mere feet away, and I had to be careful. The natural urges to hold her hand, touch her hair, trace my fingers along her thigh were powerful and hard to resist. It was frustrating to not be able to act on the impulses – I wanted to show her how much I wanted her, but the risk of getting caught was too great. Sensing some of my frustration, Bella linked my pinky finger in hers and placed our hands low between us where they couldn't be seen from the front.

Emmett finally brought the truck to a stop, right on the edge of a hill. Just down a slight slope Quil, Sam and Embry had already started up a large fire. Everyone piled out and made short work of unloading the supplies and carrying them down to the flat area below.

Bella and Alice quickly set to work on organizing the boxes of food and supplies. Jasper busied himself with setting up a portable table, and Sam was quickly making his way through a pile of logs, chopping each piece into manageable fire wood. Embry and Quil were busy whittling some branches into cooking sticks, and Emmett was off in the bushes taking a piss.

Watching everyone working so efficiently together made me feel a little out of place and a lot useless. Standing back with my hands in my pockets, I wanted to help – I just didn't know how.

"Hey Eddie," Emmett clamped his hand on my shoulder, surprising me from the bushes. "Wanna help me with the tents?"

"Yeah, for sure," I replied, following him over to the stack of colourful canvas bags on the ground. I'd never set up a tent before, but I was pretty confident that I would be able to figure it out, and was grateful to have something to do.

"So –" Emmett hollered, gathering everyone's attention. "Who's sleeping where?"

"Me and the boys will stay together – just give us the big one," Sam called out between swings of his axe.

"Deal," Emmett replied, tossing the thickest red bag over to the side.

"Me and Bella will be together, right?" Alice piped up, much to my dismay. I knew there would be no way in hell that Bella and I would get away with sharing a tent, but I wanted to. Badly.

"Yep," Emmett agreed, tossing a purple canvas bag to the other side. "That leaves Jasper, Eddie and me. Two tents left, boys. You guys wanna share?"

"No!" Jasper blurted – a little too quickly – earning a funny look from everybody, particularly Emmett.

"What the hell's wrong with him?" Emmett shot back jokingly, pointing over at me.

"He thrashes around in his sleep too much. I hear it all the time from my room. I don't want to wake up to him spooning me or something," Jasper replied.

"Dude – you've been spying on me while I'm sleeping? I know you creep around at night and shit, but–" I started, then out of the corner of my eye, caught Bella frantically drawing her finger across her neck in a "cut it out" motion.

"But he's right," I quickly recovered, playing into whatever Jasper and Bella had going here. "I'm a rough sleeper. You guys mind sharing?"

"That's fine," Emmett said, looking between me and Jasper curiously. "But I snore, and you guys are strange."

No more than an hour later, all of the tents were set up and everyone's bedding was unrolled and prepared for the night. The tents were placed fairly far apart, utilizing the flattest spots on the bank. It was a little embarrassing that I needed extra help with mine – luckily, Quil came to my aid and helped me straighten out my pile of poles and canvas – but I got it done anyway, and even helped the other guys with their pegs and rain guards.

Once everything was all unpacked and ready, Sam, Embry and Quil rounded up both a paintball gun and a bow and arrow set, in addition to a bag full of old cans and bottles. They announced that they were heading off for some target practice, and disappeared through the trees. They extended the invitation to the rest of us, but I wanted to stick close to Bella, and Jasper looked terrified at the idea.

"You ever been canoeing before?" Jasper asked me. He was warming his hands over the fire with Bella, and Alice was pouring glasses of water from the large water container we had packed for her and Emmett.

"Nope. Never," I replied.

"Me neither!" Alice chirped in. "You guys wanna go?" Though I hadn't seen much of Alice, from what I had seen I could tell that she had endless energy.

"I'm in. It's not that far to carry the canoes. It won't be too bad if we pair up guy/girl," Bella added.

"Well, if you guys do that, I'm gonna have a nap. Be back before sunset though, got it?" Emmett piped up with an exaggerated yawn. Bella and Alice quickly loaded up backpacks and we headed for the lake.

The trek to the lake wasn't without difficulty. Though Bella was shorter than me, she was quite strong, and our height difference wasn't bad enough that we were uncomfortable carrying the canoe through the trees. The same couldn't be said for Jasper and Alice.

Alice barely cleared the 5' mark, and Jasper had a good few inches on me, putting him well over 6'. Alice was eager to be successful, and even when her arms would need a break or she'd trip and stumble, her spirits stayed positive. She laughed and joked about her clumsiness. If it had been me, I would have been embarrassed and frustrated to the point of anger. I probably would have kicked something and given up, but Alice was determined, and not willing to let the obstacles get her down. Jasper provided lots of gentle encouragement – he was both patient and kind. Watching the two of them, while comical at times, was actually pretty sweet. Seeing them work together made me wonder if maybe they would be able to work through some of the other difficulties that they would face as a potential couple as well.

Once we reached the lake and got the boats in the water, we were all finally able to relax. Both Jasper and Bella had a lot of experience and between the two of them, they gave us a brief rundown of what to do before we climbed in our respective canoes.

As odd as it may sound, I could have kissed Jasper once I realized that he was paddling his and Alice's canoe around in the complete opposite direction of me and Bella, around a large bend in the bank. I'd been aching for some privacy with Bella since the night we were last together – in more ways than one – and had no idea if I could expect it at all on this trip.

"I'm glad we're alone," I said, as I dragged my heavy paddle slowly through the water, just the way Bella showed me. She was behind me – she had all the skills, after all – and she was better able to steer us from the rear seat.

"Me too. We'll get out a ways and we'll just drift around for a bit, k?" she suggested.

"Ok. You cold?" I asked, noticing that out on the lake the wind packed an even colder bite. Above us you could see and hear giant "v" formations of geese flying south through the sky. They clearly had the right idea.

"No, I'm ok. Just my cheeks a bit," Bella added. She was bundled right up – hiking boots, heavy socks, a flannel shirt underneath a hoody, underneath a vest, topped with a coat. Her hair was down, and tucked beneath a wool "toque" – as she called it – complete with ear flaps. After getting a peek at what lay beneath those layers, it was all I could think about. I cursed the cold weather again, wishing I could pry them off of her one by one.

We paddled out a little further, the silence between us comfortable. The sounds around us were eerie, but peaceful – a howling coyote, a deep cooing bird, branches cracking and snapping in the distance. The fog that was higher in the valley when we first arrived was settling down around us on the lake, giving us another thin layer of privacy. Jasper and Alice's canoe was nowhere to be seen.

"Let's stop here for a bit. Turn around," Bella instructed as she rested her paddle in behind her. I swung my legs around so I was facing her. We were close, but she was still too far for my liking. "So, Charlie tells me you're halfway, eh?"

"Um, yeah. Three weeks left," I said blankly.

"I've been trying not to count. How're you feeling about it?" she asked softly.

"Not all that great, actually," I replied, being completely honest. "I'm gonna miss you."

"I know – I'll miss you, too. But you've got to miss Esme and Carlisle, right? And come on – you've probably got a little harem waiting to track you down as soon as you get off that bus, right?" Bella said with a weak smile. She was trying to joke, but I could hear the hurt in her voice.

"I do miss them, but no–" I declared seriously and firmly, needing her to understand me. "There won't be anyone else, Bella. You know you can trust me, don't you?"

"I want to," she softly replied.

"I promise you. No one else. We can still do this, right?" I asked, suddenly frantic to know that she was still on the same page as me.

"I want to, Edward. I really, really do. It's just all so new – how will we stay in touch? We still barely even know each other."

"We'll call, and text, and Skype. I'll visit, and you can visit..." I trailed off, feeling a lump rising in my throat. I probably sounded desperate, but I didn't care. I was desperate. "I can't leave here knowing that we won't even try this."

Bella was picking at her nails, unable – or perhaps unwilling – to meet my eyes. I stared at her for what felt like forever, and as moments passed, I cursed our current location and my inability to flee if this suddenly went sour.

"Bella, please say something," I begged, sounding hollow. I watched, frozen in place by fear, as Bella cupped her face in her hands, hiding her eyes from me. She shook her head back and forth, and surprisingly chuckled to herself.

"So–" she said with a grin as she peeled her fingers from her face. "Does this mean you're my boyfriend, then?"

I leapt up quickly without a word, the canoe rocking beneath me violently. I wrapped my arms around her waist and squeezed her with everything I could. Bella howled in laughter and stretched both arms and legs out to steady us.

"Careful! If we flip, no deal!" she squealed. I spread my knees out on the canoe floor, and steadied myself by placing my hands on Bella's knees.

"So, do we tell everybody?" I asked. I wondered if Bella and I were, in fact, "official," perhaps it was time to come out with it.

"Hmm. I don't know," Bella replied, deep in thought. "What about this – you head back, and we let a little time pass. After you're gone awhile, I'll tell everyone that we stayed in touch and things just kind of happened. Is that ok?"

"That works," I replied, slight disappointment evident in my voice. "I just wish we didn't have to hide it, ya know? It's so hard when you're near me..." I trailed off, taking her hands in mine and wrapping our fingers together.

"I know – it's hard for me, too, but there are ways for us to be together still. I'm on it. Don't worry about that, k?" she replied, and I felt my temperature rise. Knowing she was looking forward to – and potentially plotting towards – more time together was a huge turn on.

The rest of our time on the lake was spent lazily drifting, chatting, kissing. We kept things PG – it was a new and different kind of intimacy. Bella had seated herself atop a spare sweater on the base of the canoe and was comfortably reclined between my legs. I leisurely twirled her hair between my fingers, and she played with the loose threads on my jeans. I couldn't recall a time – in my whole life – where I felt as comfortable as I was in that moment.

Sometime later, we were startled from our peaceful bubble by the sound of high-pitched laughter echoing through the fog across the lake. We could barely make out Alice's and Jasper's silhouettes, but we could see Alice's arms waving wildly around in the air, deep in an animated story. The other sound I didn't recognize, I finally identified as Jasper's deep belly laugh – in the weeks that had passed, I had never seen him so laidback and carefree. The two of them were definitely hitting it off, and I couldn't have been happier for the guy.

We followed Jasper and Alice back to land and tied the canoes up to some trees near the shore. The other guys had mentioned going after fish early the next morning, so we thought we'd save them the hassle of bringing the boats back.

Back at our campsite, Bella and Emmett – who'd woken up just as we got back – started laying out stuff out for dinner. Quil and the other guys returned shortly after we did, and he and I went on a hunt for some long logs to sit on around the fire.

Dinner was pretty generic campfire food – hot dogs and smokies with all the fixings, and s'mores for dessert. We laughed and joked with one another – Jasper gently poked fun at Alice's preference for burnt black hot dogs and Bella got quite a kick out of the fact that I'd never had s'mores before. The other guys shared with us their target practice experience – apparently Sam was the sharpshooter of the bunch, and no one should get within a mile of Quil and any type of target.

Before we knew it, the campfire roaring between us was the only source of light left. The sun had completely fallen behind the wall of the valley, and everyone was huddled close around the warmth of the fire. Bella boiled a kettle of water above the fire pit on a grill that the guys had rigged up earlier, and prepared instant cocoa for everyone from a powered mix. It was nothing like the stuff she made at her cabin for us, but it did the trick to warm everybody up a bit.

Though I was a stranger to camping, I had been to my fair share of bush parties outside of the city back home. They usually started with a keg, and wound up with everyone wasted out of their minds, getting up to all kinds of trouble. As I watched the group around me, I noticed how much fun they were all having. Alcohol and drugs weren't an option, or even a consideration. I truthfully didn't miss it. I thought for a moment about getting the guys I hung out with to do something similar, but I knew that I'd get laughed at – that they wouldn't even consider it.

"Who wants a blanket?" Emmett called out, snapping me out of my daze. "I've got four spare throws, so you guys might have to get cosy. Remember what Charlie said though–"

"No funny business?" Jasper, Bella and I all said in unison, then burst out laughing. The others looked at us like we were crazy.

"Yeah, that," Emmett chuckled, as he tossed a flashlight to Sam, Bella, Jasper and me – one per tent.

"What does that even mean?" Quil asked, not really expecting an answer.

"It's Charlie – you know the motto. When it comes to that stuff, 'don't ask, don't tell!'" Bella chuckled.

"You ever ask Charlie if he and Sue get up to any funny business?" Quil joked, earning a firm swat to the leg from Bella.

"See! I knew he was tapping that!" I piped in.

"Gross. Not you, too. That's my dad, assholes," Bella balked, shaking her head at us. "Give me a blanket, Em – I'll share with the hoser," she said, gesturing to me. Sam and Embry both declined a blanket, opting instead for extra layers from their tent.

Alice grabbed one and offered it to Jasper. The poor guy looked like his eyes were gonna pop out of his head, but he took the blanket and spread it loosely across their laps.

"Why don't you tell one of those creepy stories, Jas?" Quil yelled out across the fire as he wrapped himself up in his throw. Bella had slung ours over our shoulders and we huddled close.

"I don't know, it's been awhile–" Jasper trailed off, nervously.

"Come on, man. It'll be fun," Emmett gently prodded. "Edward hasn't heard about the Bush Man, and I bet Alice would like to know it, too."

"The Bush Man?" Alice asked curiously.

"Yeah – this one's apparently true, too," Embry added. Embry was always really quiet – rarely speaking up – so his comment caught everyone's attention.

"We don't know that for sure. I mean, are you guys…I guess I'll–"

"Just start it, Jasper. It'll be fine," Bella said softly. He took a minute to compose himself, and then leaned forward on his forearms and stared off into the fire.

"My granddad told me this story, when I was just a little guy. Scared the living piss out of me, but he said I needed to know. We weren't allowed near the woods at night, and he figured once I was old enough to question it, I was old enough to know why. You all with me?" he asked, and everyone nodded silently.

"Up the road, not far from my granddad's place, there lived a man by the name of Jason Jenks. He had a family – a wife and two girls. Was a good, church-going, hard-working man. But Jenks had a dark side," he paused, presumably for dramatic effect. The fire was casting moving shadows across his face, and all around us you could hear the sounds of a forest very much alive. Everything definitely added up to a spooky atmosphere.

"A real life Jekyll and Hyde. Rumour has it that before the night of the big incident, he went to his pastor asking for help with his demons. He said he had voices telling him to do horrible, evil things, and that they were getting stronger," Jasper paused again, taking a sip of his cocoa.

"His pastor ordered him home to pray. But it was no use. Neighbours reported strange behaviour – he was caught staring in the window of his elderly neighbour's house, and he was found buying carts full of nothing but meat from the local grocery store. His wife, scared and embarrassed, had made arrangements to leave with the children and stay with her parents. But it was too late.

"On a cold October evening, much like this one, Jason Jenks – in a fit of psychotic rage – murdered his wife and children in the basement of their home. Reports from the scene say that it was the most animalistic, voodoo-crazy ritualistic mess that anyone on the force had ever seen. And the worst part of it all?"

"What?" Alice asked softly, her eyes wide as saucers.

"He's never been found. He fled the scene, straight to the dense forest that we find ourselves in this very minute. They combed every inch of this here woods, but had no luck. Hunters over the years have come across abandoned camps – where strange markings and human traces have been found, but the man himself has never been caught. Families on the outskirts of town have reported sightings – a man dressed in animal skins and furs, watching them from the treeline, sobbing."

"What's with the meat?" Sam asked, looking sceptical.

"They say that the voices told him that was all he could eat, and that it had to be raw. Explains how he could live out here this long," Jasper added smoothly. I had to hand it to the guy – he was an excellent storyteller. Though I didn't buy the tale, I was sufficiently creeped out.

"Oh my God, Jasper – how am I supposed to sleep tonight?" Alice whined, huddling closer to Jasper, who was taken by surprise at her closeness.

"Don't worry, Al – Emmett told me the same story years ago – remember that?" Bella called out to Emmett, who burst out laughing.

"She wouldn't sleep alone for weeks. She was freaked out that Jenks was gonna be creepin' around her windows," he bellowed, clutching at his sides.

"I was eleven! Anyway – I made Charlie check it out for me. The RCMP have no records of anything like this, so it's totally an urban legend."

"Well, good. But I'm still spooked," Alice said. "Come pee with me, Bella? There's no way in hell I'm going alone!"

After the girls made it back from the bushes, yelling and giggling along the way, we polished off another bag of marshmallows and the rest of the cocoa. Wanting to get up early the next morning to hit the lake for fish, Sam, Embry and Quil retired to bed first. Emmett stayed up a little longer, he and I talking a lot about the school and the courses he took.

We all helped tidy up the camp before Emmett snuffed out the fire – we needed all traces of food and garbage to be locked up tight, as bears weren't uncommon in the area. Flashlight in hand, the girls made their way to their tent, but not before I snuck a quick kiss from Bella just after Emmett zipped his own tent shut.

Once the fire was out, I realized how cold it really was. I had let Bella take the extra throw blanket back to her tent with her, but I was definitely wishing I had one of my own.

Inside my tent, I kicked off my boots and peeled off my layers. My skin was covered in goose bumps and my teeth were chattering. I stripped down to my sweats and t-shirt and left my thick socks on – there was no way I could've taken them off, I was so cold. I climbed into my sleeping bag – which was rated for the chilly weather – but the air all around me was freezing. I rubbed my hands together and pulled the blanket up over my head, hoping to trap my warm breath inside. It wasn't making any difference.

I huddled still, closing my eyes and trying to drift off for what felt like hours but was probably only minutes. I debated wrapping up in my sleeping bag and heading back to the fire again, but realized I'd have a hell of a time starting it up from scratch in the dark.

Just as I started slipping off to sleep, the sound of my tent zipper slowly peeling back sent me jumping upright on my foam pad. After the Bush Man story, I was still a little edgy.

"Who's there?" I whisper-yelled.

"It's me – I'm freezing to death!" Bella hushed back as she peeked her head in. She was wrapped up tight in the red and black wool throw we had earlier shared. "I'm coming in."

"You can't! Are you trying to kill me? Emmett will kill me!"

"I went by their tent – he's snoring like a pig. It's fine!" she whispered. Emmett and Jasper's tent was a ways away from ours, but the thought of Emmett pulling me out by the scruff of my neck and pummelling me was not an appealing one.

"Fine – get in."

Bella slipped in quickly, and kicked her boots off next to my foam pad. She tossed the blanket over to me with a grin, then dropped her sweats, revealing a tiny pair of boy shorts. She quickly stripped off her hoody, revealing a tight little tank top. I could clearly see that she wasn't wearing a bra – the cold making it even more obvious.

"Ok – now you're really trying to kill me," I groaned, as I let my eyes wander over her.

"Shh – let me in!" she giggled. I held the blankets back for her, and she slipped right in beside me. "It'll be warmer if you take these off. Skin to skin, eh?"

"You pulling my leg?" I joked, as I wiggled out of my pants and pulled my shirt over my head.

"Come on – how hard do I really have to pull?" she asked with a grin. I tossed my clothes to the side, and felt Bella pushing her socks off with her toes. She traced her chilly feet up my calves and curled into my chest, seeking warmth. I buried my face in her hair, and rubbed large circles over her back to generate heat.

"Did you just smell me?" she giggled, as she shivered slightly.

"I did. You smell good."

"Like fire pit?" she questioned with a chuckle.

"Yeah, a little."

Moments passed as we rubbed and cuddled together in silence. Our legs had tangled themselves together, and neither of us was shivering any more. It didn't take long for me to respond below my waist to Bella's nearly naked form beside me, but I was hesitant. The thought that we could so easily be caught was weighing heavily on my mind.

Once I'd felt Bella's lips trailing up my neck, though, I was a goner. She slowly made her way across my Adam's apple, her lips taking a jagged path over my throat and across my jaw. When our mouths met, I felt a new sense of urgency from Bella – her tongue seeking mine right away, her fingers grabbing a firm hold on my hair.

I was aching in my shorts – Bella's excitement doing nothing but spurring me on, but I wanted and needed to care for her like she did for me. Not only that, but I was eager to explore parts of her I hadn't yet been.

I broke our kiss apart, my lips making way to that very special spot just above Bella's pulse point. I slowly slid my hand up the front of her tank top, and watched as Bella's back arched up to meet me. I just barely brushed my thumb across her breast, grazing her nipple, when a soft moan escaped her lips. That was the green light I'd been waiting for.

With a gentle push, I rolled Bella onto her back and propped myself on my side right next to her. God, how I wanted to see her – the moonlight streaming through the window panel on the tent allowed me a good view of her silhouette, but I wanted to burn every tiny little detail of her physique into my brain.

"Can you take this off?" I softly asked. Bella nodded up at me and smiled. Our hands joined at the hem, and together we quickly stripped her of her shirt, her breasts laid bare before me. Bella fidgeted a little, while I sat back and stared. I was in awe of her – her smooth, perfect skin was breathtaking, her nipples begging to be touched.

"Come closer," she sighed, "I'm cold again." I picked the blanket up over my shoulder and wrapped the edge tight underneath her, hovering over her halfway. I ran my hand, now warmed up considerably, up and down her arms a few times, rubbing away any of the chill she had been feeling.

As if it was magnetic, my palm was instantly drawn back to Bella's bare chest. The feel of her soft skin against mine was incredible and I was torn between wanting to touch and squeeze or to pull her close and press her breasts to me. I opted for a mix of both.

Moments later, amongst our tangled limbs, I noticed Bella squirming beneath me, her thighs rubbing together, her hips pressing firm against my leg. Seeing her so worked up was making me crazy with need, but I knew she had to be first. I wanted to strip myself and take her – bury myself in her, but I wouldn't do it here. I wanted our first time together to be special, relaxed, and preferably on a real bed. I'd never cared that much before, and I was relatively shocked with myself for holding back. As much as it killed me to restrain myself, I knew I could still make her feel good and save that experience for another special night. That, and I didn't have a condom.

I skimmed my fingers down Bella's belly, stopping low on her hips at the band of her tight little shorts.

"Can I?" I asked as I slid my fingers along the edge of the fabric. Bella raised her head off my pillow slightly and nodded at me, before raising her hips, inviting me to remove her bottoms. I tugged them down in one swift motion, and froze at the sight before me.

Any fantasy I'd ever conjured up was nothing compared to the reality of her beauty. She had propped herself up on her elbows, and had pulled the throw blanket loosely to her chest to keep the draft away. Her bottom lip was tucked tight between her teeth, and she was watching my fingers skimming along her thighs. She looked unbelievably sexy.

I slid myself down her body further, placing small kisses between her breasts and flicking my tongue across her nipples periodically. I continued to trace my fingers along her bare thighs, not yet reaching between them. As Bella's knees fell open to the side, I took that as my cue for more.

I cupped her firmly in my palm and was awarded with a strangled moan and a deep arch of Bella's back. I almost fainted from the feel of her – the heat radiating from her was intense, and she was so smooth. Any blood left between my ears was rapidly heading south to my pants.

I moved myself so I was right between her spread thighs, and started moving my fingers in tiny circles using Bella's reactions as my lead. I had experience with girls, but embarrassingly not a whole lot in the female pleasure department. I hoped that what I lacked in skill would be made up for in enthusiasm.

Bella's head was tipped back, her breath was coming in deep gasps, and she was struggling to stay still. I slid my fingers down just outside of her entrance and paused, waiting to see the response it would get from Bella. When her hips rose sharply to meet my fingers, I knew all I needed to, and slipped one and then another finger deep inside.

I had to look away as I started moving my fingers, Bella's hips meeting every thrust, for fear of losing myself in my shorts. The feel of Bella, the soft, sexy sounds she was making and the sight of her completely relaxed in pleasure before me was too much. I was at the point where Bella could have looked at my dick and I would have come.

"Mmm, don't stop," Bella moaned out breathlessly, as she brought one hand up to her breast, her other trailing along her pubic bone just above my fingers. She had a brief moment of hesitation, then took my fingers in hers and rearranged them slightly, placing the tip of my thumb just beside her clit and pressing firmly – directing me to what she wanted.

"Like that," she cooed.

Bella's confidence in guiding me was officially the hottest thing I'd ever seen, and I appreciated the instruction. I mimicked the pressure and speed that she had demonstrated for me, and within moments, Bella was arching off the blankets, her thighs clamped shut, the walls inside her contracting and clutching my fingers within her. I slowly pulled my hand away, quickly wiping off on my discarded sock, and climbed up beside my girl.

Bella's breath was still coming in heavy gasps, but she looked blissfully relaxed with her hair spread all around her on my pillow. The temperature in our little nest had risen considerably, so much that I had begun to break a little sweat.

I flopped down beside Bella, and before she or I could say a thing, I brought her lips to mine, our mouths moving lazy and slow.

"That was perfect, Edward," she lazily sighed, rolling onto her side and snuggling into me. She pressed her body close, and jumped a little in surprise when she noticed my raging erection. I was still worked up to the point of painful. I wasn't about to beg for relief from Bella – I wanted this to be about her – but if she passed out I was honestly considering a trip to the bushes to "pee."

I was rather surprised when Bella – eyes closed tight, but with a cheeky grin on her face – snuck her hand beneath the waistband of my boxers and gripped me tightly.

I shivered from the contact, and knew that this wouldn't take long. As Bella stroked her hand up and down my length, flashes of her head thrown back and her body arching around my fingers brought the pressure in my groin to a boiling point. My orgasm shot through me with such speed and intensity that as soon as it was over, I honestly wasn't sure if I'd yelled out loud or not.

Bella rolled over to her jacket, pulled some tissue from her pocket and quickly cleaned up before she snuggled back in against me. No words were exchanged, just gentle caresses and lazy kisses. As I caught myself starting to drift off, reality dawned on me and I startled upright.

"Wait – Bella," I whispered. "Don't fall asleep, baby. You've got to go back." I felt horrible and guilty at the thought of sending her back out in the cold to her tent, but if Emmett caught her in mine, I would surely meet my doom.

"No," Bella murmured in to my chest. "My phone is set super early – it's in my coat. I'll sneak out before Emmett wakes up."

"You sure?" I asked, hesitantly.

"I'm sure, Edward. I want to stay right here."

"Ok. Sweet dreams," I said, laying a kiss in her hair. The words "I love you" popped into my head, but I quickly brushed them aside – that was way too heavy of a topic to think about, and I was flat out exhausted.

As I closed my eyes, the sound of Bella's deep, sleepy breathing soothed me to complete relaxation. At least I could say that if we were caught the next day that it was completely worth it. I wrapped Bella up in my arms tight, and settled in for the best sleep I'd had in a very long time, looking forward to whatever the morning would bring.

**A/N Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. FF is still acting up, so I've had a tougher time with review replies this time, but THANK YOU for all of them. Also want to say a big thanks to Kassiah of **_**The Fictionator's**_** for mentioning The Ranch last Friday. If you haven't already, be sure to check out their blog – great spot for rec's and other Twi stuff! =) **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N Major thanks to my awesome beta, Robzbeanie, and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91. You guys are the best! xoxo**

A warm ray of sunlight filtered through the window panel of my tent right above me. The insides of my eyelids were glowing a bright orange, alerting me to the fact that it was indeed morning, and I was still in fact alive. Which meant one of two things – that we hadn't been caught, or that Bella was still here. I was certain that if Emmett had found us, I'd be in a world of pain.

The thought suddenly dawned on me that Bella could still be sleeping soundly beside me, and in my groggy, confused state, I shot up in panic, frantically flinging my arm out to the side in search of her. A wave of relief washed over me when I finally came to the realization I was in fact alone, and Bella had somehow successfully slipped out.

Birds in the trees were chirping and cooing, and branches were snapping and popping in the distance. I could just barely make out a pair of low voices in our camp – though I knew one was definitely Bella's. I slipped from my sleeping bag and dug around in my pack for a clean t-shirt and a fresh pair of boxers. The trapped air inside my tent was warm and damp, my skin sticky with a light layer of sweat.

I pulled on my clothes and climbed out from behind the zipper of my tent. The damp, frigid air outside was a total contrast to the temperature in my canvas tent and it immediately chilled me, making me very grateful for the roaring fire.

As I slipped on my boots, I could see both Bella and Jasper tinkering around the fire pit. A metal kettle was steaming atop the fire, and Bella was mixing something up in a large stainless steel bowl. Branches and leaves rustling below my feet made quite a stir, which caught Bella's attention. She looked up at me, and a wide grin spread across her face. She gave me a quick thumbs up and winked at me before turning back to her bowl.

"You sleep good, Edward?" Jasper asked as I got closer to the warmth of the flames.

"Yeah – it was perfect, actually," I said with a smile, looking straight at Bella.

"The guys are out fishing – Em's still in his tent. Probably still sleeping," Bella piped in. "Hope you're hungry – I'm making pancakes!"

"You dragged the stuff for pancakes all the way out here?" I asked in disbelief, as I rubbed the sleep from my eyes.

"No, dough head," she giggled. "I premixed the batter at home – put it in those mason jars." She gestured to the empty flour-dusted containers on the table top. "You just need to add water, and voila!"

"You really think of everything, don't you? Where's Alice?" I questioned, looking straight at Jasper.

"She came out of her tent with her hood on, covering up her face a few minutes ago – went to go freshen up or something," Jasper said, trailing off. "Wouldn't let me see her without her 'face' on?" He looked at Bella, confusion all over his face.

"Aww – she just wants to look her best for you. I think she really likes you, Jas," Bella said softly.

A pained look crossed Jasper's face, and he clapped his hands firmly on his knees before he stood up. "I'm just gonna, um, go for a walk or something. I'll be back." He let out a heavy sigh and headed for the bank of the stream.

"Shit," Bella said under her breath. "I didn't mean to upset him."

"Don't worry – he probably just needs to think or something," I offered.

"Yeah." Bella nodded at me with a little forced grin. "You want coffee?"

"Yes, please!" I jumped up from my spot to be of assistance and grabbed a pair of mugs. "You too, right?"

"Yeah – but be careful!" She jumped as I reached for the metal handle of the pot on the fire. "It's hot Edward, geez!"

"Ha!" I snorted, trying to hide my embarrassment. This camping thing – while it had its benefits – was definitely not my forte.

"Use this!" Bella giggled, and tossed a heavy duty oven mitt at me. Just as I pulled the pot off the fire-top grill, Emmett stumbled out of his tent looking groggy and half put together.

"Morning, folks. Best sleep of my life, that was. That cool autumn air – knocks you out, eh?" he groaned with a stretch. Bella and I nodded in agreement.

"Pancakes are almost ready, Em," Bella announced as she hooked a flat metal grill pan atop of the blazing coals. "Wanna crack open the maple syrup for me?"

"With pleasure," Emmett chuckled as he pulled his Swiss Army knife from his pocket. Carlisle had given me a similar one for my birthday as a kid. I'd only ever used it to carve my initials in things that I shouldn't have.

With two loud thunks, Emmett slammed a couple of large metal cans down on the camping table, and popped a pair of holes in the top of each one.

"Mmm," he moaned, throwing his head back as he licked the tips of his fingers. "I could drink this stuff straight. You ever had real, pure maple syrup, Eddie?" he asked, his eyes still closed, savouring the sticky stuff.

"Aunt Jemima's is all I've ever had," I replied curiously.

"Well – you're in for a real treat."

A few moments later, the grill pan was full of bubbling hot cakes, and the other guys had returned from their early morning fishing trip with three good-sized lake trout in tow. Alice had returned from her deep woods primping session, and was looking fresh faced and ready for anything.

We all pushed and fought to get to the front of the line for our breakfast, but Bella had made more than enough for everybody. The warm pancakes were incredible – soft and fluffy on the inside with just a tiny layer of crust on the outside. Topped with the maple syrup and smeared with butter, they were marvellous. Emmett wasn't kidding when he said he could have drunk the stuff. I was tempted to do the same.

Conversation was minimal as everyone stuffed their faces – it mainly centered around plans for the rest of the day. Jasper had suggested that we all take a hike up to the top of the valley wall when we were finished with breakfast. Apparently, with the leaves all changing colours, the valley as a whole was really a sight to see.

After I was finished with my breakfast, I dumped my dishes off in the big pot of soapy water that Sam had heated over the fire, and headed back to my tent to dig out my toothbrush and deodorant. Even though we were deep in the woods, I figured I should at least maintain basic hygiene – especially if I was going to catch any more close moments with Bella.

I wasn't quite halfway to my tent, when an unexpected and out of place noise stopped me dead in my tracks.

"_brring, brring…..brringbrring"_

I froze, along with everyone behind me. As if some cruel joke from above was being played on me, the ringing continued – the shrill ringtone echoing through the crisp morning fog, and clearly coming from my tent.

"_brring, brring…..brring, brring"_

I spun around and looked at Bella – her face had gone as pale as a sheet, her eyes as wide as a deer caught in the headlights.

"Bella, that's your phone, isn't it?" Emmett called out, his tone even but uncharacteristically cool.

"Um, yeah. It is," she murmured, her hands gripped tight to the sudsy dish cloth – so tight her knuckles had gone white. I tried to get my feet moving again, to at least to retrieve the damn thing, but they were frozen still.

"Want to tell me why it's ringing from Edward's tent?" Emmett snapped, in both shock and disbelief.

"Just – whatever, Em. Let me go answer it," Bella murmured, then bolted off in a run past me and disappeared inside my tent.

"You gonna tell me this isn't what it looks like, Eddie?" Emmett barked out at me. "Cause right now, it's not looking very good." His stare on me was intense – one eyebrow sharply raised, his mouth set in a deep scowl.

"I, well, um – no," I stammered, at a loss for words. "I'm not gonna lie to you."

"Huh," Emmett snorted, "Start explaining, then."

Everyone else was frozen, mouths gaping, looking like a still photograph. They all quickly started scrambling at the same time – cleaning, moving things around – anything to escape the awkwardness and tension between me and Emmett.

"Well, Bella was cold – and we, just – shit," I stuttered.

"Oh my God, Em!" Bella yelled, hysterically bursting out from my tent, clutching her cell phone to her chest. "That was Charlie – something's wrong with Eclipse. I've – we've – I've gotta get back!" she cried out, frantic. Her eyes were watery, her hands starting to shake.

"Calm down, Bells – I'm sure it'll be alright," Emmett said with a deep sigh, his frustration at changing the subject obvious. "What did he say?"

"She's acting really nervous – her eyes are all red and swollen, she's not eating right. I don't know, Riley's on his way – I've gotta go!" Bella pleaded.

"I'll take her," I said softly, not sure how Emmett would respond, but the instinct to care for her and help in any way I could was too strong to ignore. "We could take a quad. She shouldn't go alone."

Emmett gave me a hard glare and glanced back and forth between me and Bella multiple times. He finally scrubbed his hands roughly over his face and threw his arms up dramatically.

"Fine. Go. Here's the key," he huffed as he dug the key to one of the quads from the pocket of his cargo pants and tossed it to Bella. "But, Edward? You and I've got a lot to talk about. Wait for me at the Ranch. You're coming to town with me later this afternoon. I'll call you, Bella!" he hollered at her.

I nodded at Emmett, at a loss for words, and hopped on the quad in front of Bella. We both gave a quick wave to the group and sped off.

The ride back to the ranch was pretty wild. Bella's arms were wrapped tight around my waist, and she kept nudging me to go faster. The terrain was bumpy, and I felt the sting as several small branches whipped me across the face and neck as we made our way through the thick forest, even with my helmet on.

We pulled up in front of the barn in a cloud of dust, skidding sideways as I sharply applied the brake. A large brand new, cherry red Chevy pickup truck was parked just outside the barn doors. The back window had a large decal – the words "Swan Crossing Veterinary Clinic" were stretched across a picture of grazing horses and cattle.

Bella and I both quickly hopped off the quad, ditching our helmets on the seat. Just as Bella reached her hand out to pry open the barn door, I stopped her quickly.

"Hey–" I said, spinning her around to face me. "Whatever this is, I'm here for you, ok? It'll be alright."

"Thank you. I'm just scared. I'll feel better when we know," she whispered as she wrapped her arms around my waist. I knew how much Bella's horses meant to her – the bond she had with her animals was incredibly strong, and my heart ached seeing her so stressed.

I held her close to me for a moment, then released her with a quick kiss to the forehead. I reached around her to pull open the heavy sliding door, and was startled by Charlie's booming voice.

"Slip in here quick, you two!" he called out. "She's a lot more settled away from the light."

"Dad?" Bella called out, rushing inside. The lighting inside the barn was very dim. Charlie and another guy – a tall, muscular blond guy – were standing next to one of the pens. Eclipse was snorting and snuffing around inside, looking very fidgety and unsettled. I had gotten to know her as a docile, laid back animal. Something was definitely off.

"Hey again, stranger!" the blond greeted Bella with a giant smile. "Long time, no see, eh?" he asked, as he flashed her his perfectly straight and white teeth. The guy looked like a walking Stetson ad, with his cowboy hat and boots and buttoned-up dress shirt. I was never one to really check out other guys, but I was confident enough that I could admit when a guy was good-looking. This Riley dude definitely was.

"Hey Riley. What's going on?" Bella nervously asked as she moved into the pen with Eclipse. "Hey, my girl–" she soothed, as she ran her hands softly down her mane. She examined the horse's eyes and around her mouth – what she was looking for, I wasn't sure.

"It's what I thought," Charlie sighed. "Alsike clover poisoning."

"Alsike?" Bella asked in disbelief. "How? We sprayed!"

"What does that mean?" I asked as I leaned back against the bench beside me.

"Alsike is a type of clover that grows around here. It's really dangerous to horses – causes sensitivity to light, sores, digestive problems. If there is prolonged exposure, it can even cause liver failure and death," the vet replied over his shoulder at me. "Luckily though, from what I can tell, Eclipse will recover just fine."

"Thank God!" Bella sighed, her hands and eyes never leaving Eclipse. "I can't believe it though – we spotted some plants months ago, but we took care of them."

"I know you're really thorough, Bella, but it doesn't take much. You should have someone inspect your fencing along her pasture – she may have wandered out and got into some. Don't worry too much though. She's gonna be ok."

"Why don't I go take a look around. Edward? You leave the keys in the quad?" Charlie asked me.

"I did, Sir. Do you need a hand?"

"No, son. You stay here. I'll be back in a few minutes," Charlie said as he slipped out the door.

"So – what happens now?" Bella asked Riley, taking another close look at Eclipse's mouth and eyes.

"I'm gonna take her temperature again before I go, and I'll be back in a day or two to look her over. Just keep her out of the sunlight for now, and out of the pasture. Watch her closely for secondary infection – you know what to look for, right?" Riley asked as he moved alongside Eclipse right next to Bella.

Bella nodded. "Thanks for coming out. I thought you weren't taking calls in this area anymore?" she asked.

"I wasn't – but I saw it was you, and I couldn't resist."

"Oh," Bella blushed, her eyes cast down at the stable floor.

"It's been so long since I've seen you around – I think the last time was right before you went to school, eh?" he asked with a grin. "At the pub, remember?"

"Yeah – I remember," Bella said softly, looking a bit uncomfortable. "Are you all done with school now?" she asked in what appeared to be an attempt at changing the subject.

"Yeah – I am, still working on my residency. That was a good night, right? We should do it again sometime," he suggested. As he started his little game of catch-up, I was beginning to feel almost invisible.

"Maybe – um, I'm gonna run inside to the washroom quickly. Edward?" Bella called out to me. "Do you want anything from the house? A drink or something?" she asked, her voice still nervous and uncomfortable.

"No, I'm good. I'll wait," I replied, crossing my arms over my chest.

As Bella headed out towards the house, I considered the fact that she must have had some sort of history with "Mr. Stetson" the vet, and it gave me an unsettled feeling. He was attractive and successful, and had interests that clearly matched Bella's. He was older than us, obviously, but I wouldn't have put him any older than mid-twenties. I would have been lying if I said I didn't feel a bit threatened.

"I'm Riley, by the way. You one of Charlie's clients?" the vet asked, thrusting his hand out at me.

"Edward," I replied, clasping his hand firmly, ignoring his question. Riley stuffed his hands back in his pockets, obviously picking up on my discomfort.

"Bella – she's sure something, eh?" he started.

"She definitely is," I replied, coolly.

"You don't know if she's seeing anyone, do you?" he asked, looking somewhat bashful.

"She–" I started, then stopped, swallowing hard. I wanted to yell at him – _Yes dipshit, ME!_ – but I stopped myself. I owed it to Bella to keep things quiet. We'd already slipped up enough. I hadn't even dealt with Emmett yet – we didn't need this guy chatting up our brand new relationship to Charlie either. "I don't really know," I trailed off.

Riley busied himself over the next few minutes fussing around Eclipse – checking out her hooves, examining her coat and taking her temperature. He got me to help hold her still while he took care of that – he stood just off the side of the poor animal, and did his medical business around her rear end. I kept my eyes off the three-minute procedure, focusing instead on Eclipse's mane and strong back, stroking her gently like Bella always did in hopes of calming her down.

Charlie and Bella joined us in the barn moments later. They were discussing something when they walked in, but stopped once they approached us. Charlie strode up beside Riley and me, and Bella took her place again at Eclipse's side.

"Found the spot," Charlie announced. "Just a ways back – there's a weakened spot in the fence. She's been sneaking out there. I'll have one of the boys repair it later today."

"That's great. Everything's looking good for now, so I'll be on my way. You sure you don't want to take me up on the offer, Bella?" Riley asked casually.

"What offer?" Charlie inquired.

"I was wondering if Bella would like to come out with me to grab a bite to eat and catch up sometime, Sir. If it wouldn't be a problem, of course."

I had to hand it to the guy – he was well-mannered and smooth. From what I could see, there wasn't really anything not to like about Riley – he had a great career, was clean cut – particularly from a father's perspective.

"Oh. Why don't you go, Bells? Would do ya some good to get away from here for awhile," Charlie encouraged. Bella busied herself petting and softly brushing Eclipse – visibly distracting herself so she wouldn't have to make eye contact with either of them.

"Thank you, but we've been really busy lately," Bella replied.

"It'd be fine! If you wanted to for a little–"

"No, Dad. I should stick around. But thank you, Riley. For coming out here and everything," Bella firmly stated, cutting Charlie off. The tension I'd been holding in my shoulders and clenched fists loosened completely once I heard Bella decline. I knew there would be no way I could stand it if Bella actually went off on a "date" with him.

"Ok – well, I'll be back in a few days. If anything changes – including your mind, Bella – give me a call. My number's on the requisition. Take Care, folks." Riley gave Charlie's hand a firm shake and waved to me and Bella before disappearing from the barn.

"What's wrong with him?" Charlie bluntly inquired as soon as he heard the pickup truck start outside.

"Dad!" Bella groaned. "Nothing – I just don't want to go out with him. Geez!"

"He's a good kid, Bella. Always has been. You could have given the boy a chance," Charlie pushed.

"I don't know this for sure, Sir," I started, unable to stop myself, "but I don't think Bella much likes pleated khaki pants. Or red striped ties. Or guys who stick their hands up horses' asses all day." I stopped – horrified at myself, and ready to literally shove my foot in my mouth.

Both Bella and Charlie stared at me – Bella's eyes wide, Charlie's eyebrow cocked inquisitively. They exchanged a quick glance with each other, and just as I was about to offer an apology for behaving out of line, the two of them burst out in laughter.

"Is that the problem, Bells?" Charlie hooted. I'd never seen him so light-hearted and cheerful in my time at the Ranch to date.

"Yes, Dad. It's the pants," Bella said sarcastically between giggles.

Despite the fact that I'd cracked a successful joke, I was still feeling troubled. Bella was hot, smart, funny – obviously guys were going to be attracted to her, and not just the douchey ones like Jake.

It made me think for a minute where I belonged in the equation – I knew I wasn't as "bad of a seed" as Jake had been, but I wondered – with my past, would Charlie really think I was good enough for his daughter? As good as someone like Riley?

Needing to escape for a whileto think, I quickly offered up my services to repair the broken fence. Bella planned to stay by Eclipse's side for the rest of the morning and keep a close eye on her, and Charlie was heading in to do some paperwork.

I gathered my supplies – the same stuff Jasper and I had used earlier in my stay to repair broken fencing – and set off to the pasture on foot, hoping the quiet walk would give me time to clear my head.

It was true that I was somewhat of a delinquent. That was why I was sent to the Ranch in the first place, and everybody knew that. But really – at one point in time, when Charlie lived in this very place, so was he. I didn't know the details of Charlie's specific situation, but given that the Ranch was known as a home for "Wayward Boys," I figured he must have been in at least a little trouble.

I thought that surely Charlie of all people, who went on to hold such an honourable position with the RCMP and then start up this place, would understand what it meant to reform. But when it came to his daughter, I couldn't help but wonder if he'd be so forgiving.

I let my mind drift to possible scenarios – Charlie finding out from Emmett about Bella being in my tent, Charlie not finding out anything from Emmett yet hating the fact that Bella and I were a couple anyway, Charlie never ever finding out that we were together and sneaking around for as long as we were a couple. The list went on and got more and more farfetched as I went. I finally decided that it wasn't something I could forecast alone, and vowed to put it aside until I could talk to Bella.

Once I arrived back from the pasture I headed for the tool shed to return my supplies. From there I could see the rest of the group just pulling in. Sam had jumped in the truck with Emmett, Alice and Jasper. Quil and Embry doubled up on a quad for the ride home and weren't trailing far behind. Charlie had made his way back outside and appeared to be debriefing Emmett. I assumed that it was regarding Eclipse, but I automatically braced myself for the worst – Emmett didn't yet know the full story, but he did know that Bella was in my tent, and that was more than enough to incriminate us.

I watched as Jasper packed Alice's bag and bedding in her tiny sports car, while the other guys unloaded the rest of the boxes and bags of gear from the back of the truck. The two of them shared a quick hug, and Alice waved goodbye to the group before taking off down the long gravel driveway. After watching her drive off, Jasper joined up with Emmett and Charlie, Sam and Embry following shortly after. Figuring it was time to face the music, I closed the shed door and made my way over to the group.

"Quil and Embry – I want you guys to ready the sprayer. After that, help Sam with the cattle in the south pasture that need to be moved," Charlie said, giving out instructions for the rest of the day. "Jasper, you and Edward–"

"Sir," Emmett interrupted, locking eyes with me as I approached from over Charlie's shoulder, "If it's alright with you, I'd like to bring Edward to town." His giant arms were crossed tight across his chest.

"Alright." Charlie looked at Emmett curiously "Fine by me. Jasper – you can move the horses around. Then go get some rest, son, you look like you've seen a ghost," Charlie directed at Jasper – and it was true. He had dark circles under his eyes and he looked completely beat.

"Play time's over, fellas – back to work." Charlie nodded to us, and headed for the chicken coop.

Emmett and I walked to his truck in complete silence. He started up his engine without so much as a peep, and turned his trademark country music up loud.

Around the halfway mark to town – I had become a lot more familiar with the route – the tension in the cab was becoming too much for me to handle. Emmett usually sang along obnoxiously at the top of his lungs to his music, but he was completely silent. He hadn't even looked at me, and I couldn't stand it anymore.

"So do you want to just do this now?" I yelled at him over the music.

"No," he said firmly, staring straight ahead at the tree-lined road in front of us.

"It's not as bad as you–"

"I said no," he snapped at me. "I need to think. We're going to the school for a bit. We'll talk later," he added calmly before he turned the music up even louder.

The regular teen crowd had turned out for sports day and were waiting for us in the gym. Although Emmett still wasn't speaking to me, I felt pretty good about the fact that he hadn't yet punched me or dropped me off somewhere deep in the bush to fend for myself.

Emmett rounded up the group in a circle, and counted everybody out into three groups. He then separated the groups out to three stations complete with appropriate supplies – a free throw station with basketballs, badminton nets, racquets and birdies, and lastly – a floor hockey net with sticks and pucks to practice slap shots. He directed me straight for the net with a smirk. I guess he wanted me to have some sort of physical punishment after all.

After several vigorous rounds of shots on me, rotating through the three groups, everyone was exhausted and ready to go home – me included. Despite the challenge of the workout, I had a good time. Some of those kids were really impressive – Seth had a hell of an arm on him, and packed a powerful slap shot. He didn't go easy on me one bit, slipping several shots in the net past me, and even had the nerve to poke fun at my rapidly healing face, hassling me that the fading bruise was starting to look like eye-shadow.

After we finished up in the gym and said our goodbyes to the kids, we headed back to Emmett's truck in the same silent manner we had on the way to town. Rather than taking our regular route home, Emmett sped off in the opposite direction, towards Main Street. The town of Swan Crossing was "blink and you'll miss it" small, but I hadn't paid very close attention to the details. I wasn't familiar with where we were heading and judging by Emmett's mood, I thought it was best to not ask, either.

Emmett pulled in to a parking spot in front of an older building, marked with a vacancy sign that read, "Swan Crossing Inn." He pulled his keys from the ignition and jumped out.

"You coming?" he called at me from across the hood.

"Um – I guess," I answered, confused. "Where are we going?"

"The pub. I need a beer for this."

Sure enough, around the corner, attached to the hotel was a tiny pub called "The Rusty Nail Saloon." It was pretty rough – the tables were covered in plastic and all had mismatched chairs tucked behind them. A static-filled TV was fixed on a hockey game, and old country – not the loud, upbeat stuff Emmett listened to, but the drawling, crying sort – played from a radio behind the bar. A few old farmer types were seated along the bar, grunting and grumbling to one another, and a pair of elderly ladies had tucked themselves away in the corner at the VLT machines. I didn't dare wonder what the bathrooms looked like. I felt seriously out of place.

"Hey there, sweetie," an older lady with long dyed-blonde hair piled high on her head cooed out at Emmett. "Haven't seen you around here in forever, handsome!" She had bright red lipstick on her teeth, and wore a nametag that read _"Irina."_

"Hey, Rina – we've been busy around the farm lately. I'll have a pint of Canadian." She grabbed a tall glass from across the bar and looked up at me as she started pouring the draft.

"How 'bout you, dear? You've got ID on you, right?" she asked with a snaggle-toothed grin. It was strange that I was able to legally drink here in a pub like this. Back home, we'd wired up fake IDs, but we only really used them to buy booze to drink at parties. The clubs were pretty smart – we didn't want to risk losing the IDs we had. I'd never been to a bar like this one, but really, I'd have been hard up to find a bar with the "character" of this one back home.

"I – uh–" I stuttered, unsure of what was expected of me.

"He'll have a Coke," Emmett cut me off. "And don't worry, he's 18."

I followed Emmett to a table on the far wall and grabbed a seat across the table from him. Irina dropped our drinks off moments later then scurried off to wipe down some of the dirty tables.

"You follow hockey at all, Edward?" Emmett asked, his eyes on the blurry TV screen.

"Not really, no," I replied. It wasn't that I didn't like it. I was just more interested in baseball.

"No NHL team you cheer for?"

"Nope."

"Huh." He sat back, taking a long swig of his beer. "Well, you might want to align yourself. I'm a Flames fan, but Charlie's a diehard for the Leafs. He's old – he remembers when they were still good," he chuckled. "So – we've got some talking to do, don't we, Eddie?"

"I know what you're thinking," I began. Knowing that this was coming, I had sort of prepared what I was going to say. It sounded alright in my head. "You're probably thinking–"

"No," he cut me off, yet again. "You don't know what I'm thinking."

"Maybe I don't, but just – we're for real, ok? We're gonna try to make this work when I go back," I blurted out, needing him to understand.

Emmett leaned back in his chair and folded his arms across his chest, thinking about what I said for a moment.

"When were you guys planning on telling Charlie?"

"Bella thought once I was gone – that it would be best that way."

"Ah boy," he sighed, as he scratched at the back of his neck with one hand. "Look – I get it, Edward. I do. You guys are all hot for each other – you're young, and it's new. I've been there too, man."

I nodded uncomfortably in response, twisting my straw around in my glass to keep my fingers busy.

"So I'm gonna tell you this. I won't say shit to Charlie, but you need to hear me out."

I nodded again, confused at where he was going with this, but relieved that he wasn't gonna snitch.

"The conflict of interest issue here is huge for me, man. I'm putting my credibility to Charlie on the line by keeping this quiet, Eddie, and I don't like that one bit. I am going along with this for one reason and one reason alone – I want Bella to be happy." He took another long swig of his beer and cracked his knuckles.

"I get that, but you didn't get all out of whack when you heard about her hooking up with Jake. I'm not trying to be a shit, but how's that fair?" I asked, trying really hard not to raise my voice. When I was still new and eavesdropped on Emmett and Quil making fun of Bella, there was no anger shown from Emmett when Bella and Jake's hook-up was mentioned.

"You heard that, did you?" he asked quietly, and I nodded. "Bella's an adult. I can't stop her from doing stuff, but this is different than that."

"How?" I stammered.

"Because she never liked him the way I can tell she likes you!" he burst out, causing the others around the bar to look over at our table. He sighed deeply, then got himself back together.

"I've seen the way she is around you. She smiles, she's relaxed. And after last year, that shit means a lot to me, you know?" He looked me straight in the eyes, driving his point home.

"Yeah, man. She makes me happy, too. I'd never want to hurt her, Em."

"I wouldn't just let this fly for anyone else. I know that underneath the teenage bullshit you're a good kid – you can do good for yourself. But I swear to God, if you make me eat those words – there will be hell to pay. You've got the power to really hurt her – that's something that Jake never had. You understand that?"

"I get it. I promise," I said sincerely.

"Good then," Emmett replied with a grin, and nodded, "Let me finish this beer and enjoy the rest of this game."

The ride back to the Ranch was much more pleasant. Emmett and I talked a bit more about my plans once I returned home. We also got on the topic of my return to the Ranch. I wasn't really sure when my first return trip would be, but I knew I'd want to see Bella as quickly and as often as I was able. Emmett even went ahead and suggested that I could attend his and Rose's wedding at the Ranch in June as Bella's "Plus 1."

The scary thing was that June seemed like an eternity away. Bella and I had only known each other for a few short weeks, but being in such a close, open atmosphere made me feel like I'd know her for so much longer. I was certain that I wouldn't be able to make it through the winter without seeing her at all. I resolved to make a concrete plan with her at the next available opportunity.

The sun had set in the sky as we drove down the dusty gravel road back to the main house. Emmett switched up his regular music for the local radio station, claiming that he wanted to get an idea of the weather forecast for the week. Not another word was mentioned about Bella and me, and I was relieved as well as grateful that he trusted in me to do right by her.

As we approached the house, something seemed funny. Down the driveway, through the thick trees, I could see bright flashing lights coming from the direction of the main house.

"Em – you see that?" I asked, gesturing to the flashing red and white.

"Yeah, man–" he murmured nervously, as he sped up slightly. "What the hell?"

We rounded the bend in the driveway, and the situation ahead suddenly became very serious. An ambulance was backed up to the main house, its lights flashing brightly.

"Oh shit!" Emmett yelled, as he rushed to pull up next to it, jumping out just as he put the large vehicle in park. The guys were all gathered around the step, but with the darkness and blur of frantic people I couldn't make out who everyone was.

Before I could even unbuckle my seat belt, Bella was outside my window banging on it in a panic – her eyes wide and filled with tears, her cheeks bright red.

I thrust my door wide open, and she fell into me, sobbing against my chest.

"What's going on? Are you ok?" I asked, desperate and worried. "Who's hurt? Is it Charlie?" I questioned, remembering a brief mention of Charlie having health troubles long ago.

"No, Edward," she sobbed, visibly shaking. It's Jasper."

**Dun, Dun, Dunnnnnn…Hate to leave it there on you guys, but it's the most natural place! =) The next chapter will be an extra week or so – my beta is going on an amazing holiday, and I am supremely ****jealous**** excited for her. Chapter 15 will definitely be up before the end of April. Thanks so much, as always, for reading and reviewing! xoxo**


	15. Chapter 15

**AN Here it is, guys! Major thanks to my wonderful beta, Robzbeanie, who just got back from an incredible trip (lucky lady!) and my awesome prereader CShepherd91. Please note that this Chapter deals with some delicate subject matter – nothing graphic, but material that some may be sensitive to. Feel free to PM me if you have any questions or concerns**.

The events after Bella told me that Jasper was being taken away by ambulance went by in a blur. After what felt like hours – but was probably only minutes – of chaos and shuffling around at the doors of the ambulance, Rose and Charlie hopped in the back with Jasper and sped off.

Emmett had gathered us all in the living room while he paced the hallway on his cell phone. We waited, and waited – the guys and Bella dissecting the "could've beens" and the "what ifs." I was in shock – everyone around me was talking and I was able to make out "I don't know–", "took some pills–", "He wouldn't do that–" and other similar phrases amongst the distress, but nothing was really clear. We were all so confused.

Apparently, when Jasper had failed to come downstairs after Charlie called after him several times, Bella was sent to wake him up. She found him out cold on his bed, his bottle of prescription medication in his hand. She immediately screamed for Charlie, who called the ambulance. Emmett and I had arrived just after the ambulance did.

I was stunned silent. I had Bella's hand so tight in my grip that she had to keep switching out her right for her left and so on because she was losing circulation. I fixed my stare on the rock fireplace and got lost inside my head with my thoughts.

Jasper had shared with me his past and his troubles. I had noticed plenty of strange behaviour in him – the insomnia, the isolation in his room – but all of that had been chalked up as par for the course given his condition.

As soon as I heard the word "pills" I thought the worst. We all did. Jasper had attempted suicide in the past – he was very forthcoming about his experiences, and how he had found the strength to move past them. Although he had tried to take his life before, I just couldn't bring myself to believe that he would do that again now. Yes, things had been rocky and weird. But camping, he was smiling, laughing – getting closer to Alice. Nobody saw something this extreme coming.

After a few more moments of pacing with his phone glued to his ear, Emmett put his cell down to connect the speakerphone in the living room. We all moved around closer as static came over the line.

"Guys? Can you hear me?" Rose's voice filled the room. She was speaking quietly, and we could hear all kinds of hospital noise in the background.

"Yeah, hun. You're good," Emmett said, as he sat down on the edge of the couch and folded his hands on his lap.

"So guys – first off, Jasper's doing well. Hmm – where do I start–" she sighed, and we all let out deep tense breaths. Knowing he was stable and ok was huge.

"He's groggy and really tired, but what we've been able to get from him is that he accidentally took too much of his anti-anxiety medication," Rose said matter-of-factly. She was clearly in "therapist" mode.

"How do you know he's not just saying that?" Quil piped in.

"I don't know that. While I'd like to believe him, given Jasper's history the doctors feel that he should stay for a few days to be monitored, and Charlie and I fully agree with them. Tomorrow, after some rest, Jasper and I are going to get to the bottom of this, ok?"

"When can we come visit?" Bella asked, her voice hoarse.

"Probably tomorrow afternoon, if he's up for it. Stay home for the night – this is a very stressful situation for all of us, and you guys need to take care of yourselves, too. I'll call back and let you guys know, ok?"

Everyone gave Rosalie well wishes to pass on to Jasper, before disconnecting the phone call. Emmett gave us the green light to do what we wanted for the evening, so long as it "wasn't stupid," and advised us to stick together. He was heading to the hospital to pick up Rose. Charlie had planned to stay the night with Jasper.

Sam, Embry and Quil opted for a game of cards around the kitchen table. Embry had asked if I wanted in, but I declined – I knew I wouldn't be able to focus on cards, but I also knew I didn't want to be alone.

"Where are you heading?" I asked Bella, who was busying herself by straightening up the couch pillows and throw blankets.

"I don't even know," she said with an exhausted sigh as she flopped down on the couch and clutched a fuzzy pillow to her chest. "What a freaking day, eh? Thank God Jasper's ok. That was so scary, Edward."

"I know – I can't believe all that just went down," I replied as I stuck my hands in my pockets nervously. "Wanna head back to your place? Just relax a bit?" I asked. I didn't want her to get the wrong impression – I really just wanted to hang out, and didn't want her to be alone either.

"Yeah," Bella replied, "get your overnight stuff – let's go."

xoxoxox

Once we arrived back at the cabin, I took over for Bella. Even though it was her place and I wasn't familiar with everything, she was exhausted. This was my chance to take care of her – show her that she could lean on me when stuff got hard. I had to prove it to myself that I was capable, as much as I did to her.

After a little arguing and insisting, I put on a kettle of water for tea while Bella curled up under a throw blanket on the couch. I rummaged through her cupboards, pulled out a box of Oreos, and stuck a handful in a bowl.

Bella had gotten up from the couch and put on some quiet music before she disappeared into her bedroom. A few minutes later, as I was pouring water for her tea, she came back looking freshened-up but incredibly tired. She had tied her hair up in a messy knot on top of her head and stripped down to a tank top and some loose flannel PJ pants.

My eyes were instantly drawn to the bumps and curves of Bella's braless chest, but I mentally slapped myself for going there. Yes, I was 18 and often did my thinking with my dick, but I wasn't so pathetic that I couldn't put those thoughts aside for the night.

"Your tea's ready," I said, holding up the teacup for her and presenting her my bowl of cookies.

"You're sweet," Bella replied with a little giggle. "Would you be ok with just hanging out in my room? I'm bagged – I just wanna lie down."

"Um, yeah – of course," I said, a little surprised, but cool with it. I hadn't been in Bella's room yet, and somehow this felt like a big deal.

I followed Bella, carrying her tea, cookies and a can of Coke for me on a little tray I found on her counter. Her room was decorated much the same as the rest of her house – clean, but a little untidy, bright colours here and there and ton of pictures all over the place.

Her bed looked like the kind that called your name. Unlike my twin bed back in the main house, Bella's bed was a queen, and topped with a thick, deep purple duvet and lots of pillows. I couldn't wait to flop down on it, but was suddenly hit with a reality check.

I didn't have any pyjamas.

I was a sleep-in-my-undies kind of guy – always had been. I knew I was being paranoid, but the last thing I wanted was for Bella to think that tonight and my being here was about sex, and if I was in my underwear, how could she not?

I peeled my shirt over my head, and slowly folded it in a neat square. With my back turned to Bella, I pulled off my belt while admiring the pictures on her dresser – her and her mom under a palm tree, her and Alice in front of the diner in town, and many others.

"Something, wrong, Edward?" Bella asked from beneath the covers. She had propped herself up against her headboard and had her blanket pulled up to her chest.

"Um – no, why?"

"You're stalling," she said with a grin.

"Well, I uh, I don't have pyjamas," I admitted, embarrassed. "I should have grabbed my sweats – I just packed my toothbrush and stuff."

"What do you normally sleep in?"

"Boxers."

"Then wear your boxers. It's really no big deal," she said, as she rolled her eyes at me and giggled to herself.

"I just didn't want you to think–"

"I know. Thank you – but I don't. Don't overthink it, just get in here. I'm cold." She held the blankets open for me, and I dropped my jeans and slipped in beside her.

We shuffled around and tangled ourselves together, eventually winding up with Bella's head on my chest, my arm beneath her and my fingers messing with her hair.

"Did you see it coming?" she asked once we settled in.

"Jasper?"

"Yeah – what happened tonight," she clarified as she reached for my hand. Bella started casually running her fingers along my palm and up and down the length of my fingers. It felt amazing and incredibly relaxing.

"No – I mean, he was acting kinda weird, but I didn't think he'd do this."

"You know, I thought about it pretty hard at one point," she confessed, and my heart dropped.

"When you were at school?" I asked a little louder than I should have. Her confession gave me a panicky feeling though, and I couldn't really help it.

"Not about doing it, but about why people do. How they can feel so low that they consider it. I mean, I felt bad – really, really bad. But never that bad that hurting myself was an option. I couldn't imagine feeling that way – that you would feel like suicide was your only way out. It's so sad."

"I'm sorry that you ever felt so shitty," I replied. "I hope that it never happens again."

"Thanks. I don't know – I've grown a lot from my experience. I know how to cope better, am more aware of what makes me feel good and bad. This situation with Jasper is a wake-up call though – you just never know," she sighed.

"I hope I help with the feeling good," I said quietly.

"You do," Bella replied, as she lifted herself up and placed a tiny kiss on my jaw.

"Emmett knows, you know. All about us? He called me out on it in town after the phone thing. I still can't believe you did that," I chuckled. In all of the chaos since we'd been home, I hadn't had the chance to fill Bella in on Emmett's and my discussion at the pub.

"He did, eh?" she said with a chuckle. "Did he threaten to kill you yet?"

"Not exactly," I laughed. "He's not very happy about keeping things from Charlie. And he did warn me that I better not screw up with you. He cares about you a lot," I said as I ran my fingers through her hair.

"I know, and I get that he means well, but really, we–" she said, poking her finger on my chest and then back at herself, "– are my business. Charlie'll find out later and it will be fine. I'm not worried about it."

"Good," I replied, glad that at least Bella wouldn't be worrying about Charlie's reaction. I certainly was. "How's Eclipse doing?" I asked, quickly changing the subject.

Not only did Bella have to deal with the devastating incident with Jasper, but she had a sick horse on top of everything. Even though the "Stetson" vet had given the green light, Bella and Charlie were both still quite concerned.

"She was better this afternoon. Being out of the sunlight was keeping her a lot more comfortable. Riley's really good at what he does – I trust him."

"He's kind of a dork," I bitterly replied, before I could even think about it.

"What? Wait – are you jealous of Riley?" Bella questioned, as she propped herself up on her elbow. "You've got to be kidding me!" she said as she looked at me like I had two heads.

"I – no! I don't know…" I trailed off. Once Bella put it that way though, I realized it was true. "Maybe I am, I guess."

"Oh my God, Edward. Why?" she asked, stunned. "I mean, he's a good guy – but me and him never had anything big…we just hung out a few times. Is that what it is?"

"No. Not exactly," I said quietly as I ran my hands through my hair. I hated being put on the spot like this, but I was trying to be "emotionally honest" to everyone in my life now – and that meant I needed full disclosure with Bella. At least Rose would have been proud.

"It's just that, I don't know – compared to me? He's no screw-up. Come on – you saw how Charlie pushed for you guys to hook up. On a scale of one to ten? I'm a three and he's a thirteen."

"Give yourself more credit, Edward. Or I'll go all "Charlie Swan" on you and start in on how if you don't believe in yourself, no one will. Cookie?" she offered as she picked up the bowl from her nightstand and thrust it in my direction. "Oreos make everything better."

"Yeah, thanks," I said and snatched one from the dish.

"Whun doo woo fink wool see each offer," Bella mumbled behind a mouthful of cookie as she curled back in to my side.

"What?" I chuckled. "When will we see each other again?"

"Yeah."

"Well, Emmett invited me to the wedding – said I could be your date. He probably should've checked that out with you though, right?"

"Ha! Yes, he should have – but good. I want you to be there. But that's too far away," she said softly as she picked my arm up and pulled it across her as she rolled away, holding my forearm tight.

"I know. Maybe we can try for something over Christmas?" I offered.

"Yeah. I like that plan. It'll be quiet here," she said with a yawn.

"You could come meet Esme and Carlisle, maybe? Or I could come back and see everyone. What do you think?" I asked, but was met with the sound of heavy breathing. I peeked over her shoulder, and sure enough, Bella was sound asleep.

I reached across her and flicked off the bedside lamp, then held Bella close in the darkness. How I was going to adjust to the long distance, I wasn't sure, but the one thing I did know was that every little effort we put in would definitely be worth it.

xoxoxox

"I sent her a text….. Yes….When she called, I told her pretty much everything…..Well, I had to, Em – she's my friend….I know, but how fair would it be not to tell her?"

I awoke to the sound of Bella on her phone just outside the bedroom door. From the sound of things, she and Emmett weren't seeing eye to eye.

My sleep in Bella's bed was the best one I'd had at the Ranch to date. It could have been the exhaustion after the previous day's events, but most likely it was the fact that I was able to sprawl out on the bigger mattress with my girl beside me.

"Fine. Get Charlie to call me," Bella grumbled into her phone, and hung up as she walked right past her bedroom doorway. She did a double take when she realized I was awake.

"Hey – you're up. Hope I didn't wake you," she said, leaning against the door frame.

"No, no – just woke up. Everything ok?" I asked, rubbing sleep from my eyes.

"Yeah – that was Emmett. Jasper's awake – he and Rose went over to the hospital this morning. Apparently, Jasper doesn't want Alice finding out about any of this, but it's too late."

"You told her?" I questioned. I hadn't really considered the effect this would have on their new relationship.

"Yes. I had to! You understand that, right?" she pleaded, getting worked up all over again.

"Hey – it's ok. Of course I do. Jasper should be the one to give her details, but she should know what's happening."

"Exactly. Thank you," she said as she flopped down beside me and crawled under the covers. "They're having some meetings and stuff, but Em said we can head over in a few hours."

"Sounds good. What's the plan before we go?" I asked with a yawn and a stretch.

"Well – I made coffee. I was thinking of a shower."

"Go ahead if you want, I'll wait for you here," I replied. I needed a few minutes to get with it – and the morning wood in my pants needed to quit before I got up.

"No, silly," she said, as she ran her foot up my leg. "I meant with you."

xoxoxox

On the way into town, all I could think about was Bella – hair soaked and clinging to her back, water droplets dripping from her perky chest, bubbly suds running down her flat tummy and slipping between her thighs. Even though we worked each other over thoroughly – I hadn't lasted long under Bella's soapy hands – I still was popping wood in the cab of the boss man's truck just thinking about it.

My mind kept going back to a particular moment in our shower that made me nearly lose my load on the spot. After paying particularly close attention to the cleanliness of Bella's breasts, I slipped my hand between her legs and was met with the most beautiful gasp – and then the words that were music to my teenage ears: "I want more, Edward." I reassured her that soon – very, very, soon – we'd make that happen.

"Whatcha thinking about?" Bella asked from behind the steering wheel of Charlie's gigantic white pickup truck. Charlie had called just after we finished up and asked that we bring him his truck since he'd gone with the ambulance. The vehicle was monstrous – Bella looked so small behind the wheel of it.

"You. That shower," I replied with a grin, and watched the blush spread over Bella's cheeks.

"I still wish you didn't have to leave," she said softly, then turned to me with a grin, changing her tune, "I'm gonna be stuck in that shower all alone."

"Ung," I groaned. "It's gonna kill me, you know that, right?" I moaned out, thinking about Bella and a solo shower performance turned the semi in my pants rock hard.

"I'm really gonna miss you though," she replied, the sadness she tried to momentarily mask returning. "Christmas. For sure, Christmas."

"Definitely Christmas."

xoxoxox

We met Charlie in the parking lot of Swan Crossing Community Hospital and followed him towards Jasper's room. The building was smaller than any hospital I had ever seen, but the interior was clean and bright.

The stress of the situation and the chaos of the previous evening were showing on Charlie's face. A thick five o'clock shadow covered his jaw and the bags under his eyes were dark and puffy. Aside from a quick hello, he hadn't said much to me or Bella at all.

"This is it," Charlie said as we came to the doorway of room 207.

"You should go home, Dad. You need your rest," Bella said, concerned.

"I know, Bells. I'm going now. Rose and Emmett are around – they'll give you a ride back when you're ready. Go easy on him, ok? He's had a rough go here."

Bella and I both nodded and Bella handed Charlie over the keys. Charlie started to head off, but stopped in his tracks and turned back to Bella.

"I love you, Bella," he said, as he took his hat from his head and wiped his brow.

"Aw, Dad. I love you, too, " Bella replied, then ran over to Charlie and gave him a quick hug.

I waved goodbye to Charlie, and we watched as he made his way down the long hospital corridor. As soon as he was out of sight, I took Bella's hand in mine and we headed inside.

I pushed open the heavy wooden door to Jasper's room and held it open for Bella, who moved the privacy curtain aside just a little.

"Knock, knock?" she said, uneasily.

"Hey guys," Jasper replied, his voice scratchy. "Come on in."

"Hey man," I said as I made my way inside. The room was typical hospital – sterile, neutral colours. Two chairs were pushed close to the bedside, and Bella and I awkwardly made our way to them.

Jasper looked rough. He was propped up in his bed, an IV attached to the back of his hand. His eyes were bloodshot and puffy, and he was paler than I had ever seen him before. His longer blond hair was matted to his head in places, and he had a tray of untouched hospital food next to his bed.

"So–" Bella began, while fidgeting with the zipper on her sweater. "I was really worried about you. I still am."

Jasper nodded from his spot on his bed. "I know, Bells. I'm so sorry."

"I just don't understand, Jas–" she paused, collecting herself. Jasper cleared his throat and took a long swig from the glass of water on his tray.

"I know I need to explain. I owe it to you guys, and everyone else," he started slowly, carefully choosing his words.

"Here it goes – I didn't try to off myself. I know that's what everyone's thinking. I just – I want everything to just be normal. I thought I had it all under control. I was feeling pretty good. I'd skip my meds sometimes, but I didn't think it was that big of a deal. But when we got back from the camping trip – I just panicked. I thought I could fix it myself."

"You could have come to us though, man," I said, keeping my tone light. I didn't want to aggravate him; I just wanted him to know.

"I know, Edward. But instead I took too much, thinking I could just handle it by myself for once. I was wrong, obviously. And now I'm sitting here looking like an even bigger useless shit head than I did before, and everyone thinks I'm ready to jump."

"They're just worried about you – and they should be. You know we're here for you, right?" Bella said, taking his hand in hers.

"Yes, and thank you. I just thought I was finally coping ok with everything on my own. It felt good for once, you know?" he asked, and Bella and I nodded.

"And then Alice – I didn't want her to look at me like that, you know? Like a messed-up screw-up? She doesn't need a charity case – she's too good for that," Jasper said, his frustration clearly growing.

"You might be pissed at me, but I filled in the blanks for her, Jas – I had to," Bella said softly.

"What do you mean?" he asked, alarmed.

"I just told her that you had an accidental overdose, and that you were going to be here for a few days. I'm sorry, but I had to. She likes you a lot, she told me so – and she'll take being your friend for now, if that's what you need. Just don't shut her out. You can talk to her, too, you know."

Jasper looked down at the sheets for a few moments, then nodded. "I'm glad you told her. It stinks, but I'm glad."

"How long did they say you have to stay?" I asked, hoping to lighten things up a little.

"Right now, a few days. A specialist is coming to see me. Hopefully we can work out a new dose of meds and stuff," he said, trailing off. He had only been in for the night, but he already looked tired of it all.

"Ok. Can I claim your food while you're gone?" I asked with a grin.

"No!" Bella swatted at me playfully, and Jasper chuckled. "I'll be bringing it to him. What is this shit?" Bella asked as she dragged a spoon through some sort of hot cereal on Jasper's tray.

"I don't even know, B – but I know I'm not eating it!" he grinned, his eyes lighting up a little.

A soft knock on the door caught all of our attention. "Come in!" Jasper called out.

"Um, hi guys," a soft female voice said from behind the curtain. Moments later, Alice's head popped around the other side of the privacy curtain. "It's just me."

Bella and I shared a silent glance at one another, a grin forming on the edge of Bella's lips.

"You came," Jasper said, startled – looking as if he'd seen a ghost.

"Of course I did," Alice sniffled and gave a watery smile. "I'm just so glad you're ok. I brought you some stuff," she said as she came past the curtain. Her hands were shaking, and she looked incredibly nervous. Jasper just stared.

"I can just leave it though – I didn't mean to just show up, I'll go," she said softly as she placed a large brightly-coloured gift bag overflowing with candy, magazines, chips and other goodies on the counter.

"No – please. Stay?" Jasper pleaded.

"We're gonna go find Emmett and Rose and head out," I said, eyeing Bella, giving her the silent _'let's go.'_ "We'll leave you guys to it."

"I'll be back tomorrow, Jas, and I'll call you later, Alice. See you guys soon, k?" Bella said, patting Jasper on the leg.

As Bella and I made our way towards the cafeteria, neither of us could contain our smiles. Jasper had a long way to go, but we were both pretty confident that things would in fact be ok.

**Thank you so much for reading – I always love to hear your thoughts. Also, MAJOR thanks to willuplsbequiet for the guest review on **_**The Fictionator's**_** blog. I was so excited – sincerest thanks for the kind words! 3 The next chapter will be ready in a week or two! **


	16. Chapter 16

**AN Super big thanks to Robzbeanie, my beta, for getting this chapter – and all my chapters – back to me so quickly and looking so good! She's amazing! Also, thanks to CShepherd91, my prereader, for her helpful, supportive advice. xoxo**

After Bella and I left Jasper and Alice alone, we headed down a long sterile hallway towards the cafeteria of the Swan Crossing Community Hospital in search of Emmett. Bella was familiar with the place, so I followed her lead – although, given the size of the hospital, I probably didn't need to.

As we rounded the corner from the wing Jasper was staying in, we came into the lobby area where several information booths had been set up with bulletin boards, pamphlets, free pens and other little trinkets. The only person in the lobby was a grey-haired lady rearranging a stack of papers next to a large sign that read "STD and Sexual Health Awareness Week."

"Mrs. Cope?" Bella called out to the lady, and was met with a wide, familiar smile.

"Bella, dear – how are you!" the elderly woman exclaimed. "It's been so long. I'm volunteering to keep an eye on the health fair, and you kids are the first visitors of the day! Who's this handsome fellow, here?" she asked, gesturing to me with a frail, wrinkly hand.

"Oh, I'm sorry. This is Edward. Edward – Mrs. Cope. She actually delivered me as a baby," Bella added with a little blush. She directed her eyes and nodded her head towards the poster right behind us, where a gigantic drawn-out anatomically correct diagram with the words "Erectile Dysfunction and You" was displayed.

"Pleased to meet you, Ma'am," I said, stifling a laugh. I pulled out all my best manners and shook her hand gently.

"The road into town was flooded out so bad that night there was no way the doctor would have made it, but I paid no mind – we nurses were fully capable. She was the most beautiful baby, too, and her daddy was so proud – took her around to the nursing station to show her off to everybody. I think that was the same day that Mary Sue from down the creek fell out of the loft in that rickety old barn out in my brother's wife's father's pasture…" she kept on, deep in her memory.

I caught my mind and attention wandering, the tales of this older lady – while endearing – were boring me to tears. Bella was doing a much better job at nodding in the appropriate places and inserting "really?", "wow" and "I didn't know that" when needed than I was.

"And Boom! He shot it just in the nick of time – and that was the last time I'd ever seen a black bear around these parts," Mrs. Cope exclaimed throwing her arms up in the air. Just beyond her hands, a small yellow sign caught my eye – "Free, please help yourself" it said, just above an arrow pointing to a large bowl filled with condoms.

Jackpot, I thought. After Bella had muttered to me that she was ready and wanting more, I couldn't get the thought out of my head. With the answer to the birth control conundrum staring me straight in the face, I knew I had to act, and quickly.

"Excuse me, I'll be right back," I interrupted, though Mrs. Cope never missed a beat in her tale. Bella gave me a death glare, obviously cheesed that I was leaving her to fend for herself.

As I walked away, I peeked back over my shoulder at Bella. She was watching me with an eyebrow cocked, still half listening to Mrs. Cope, who had her fingers pressed together in a triangle above her head, giving specific instructions on who knows what.

I approached the table quickly, and gave a glance to my left and right to be sure no one other than Bella was watching me. I took a closer look at the packaging – the words "ribbed for her pleasure" were written on each package in purple letters. Nice touch, I thought.

I stuffed my hand in the bowl, retrieving a handful of the contraceptive devices, and stuffed them in the pocket of my jeans.

"There you guys are!" Emmett's voice echoed through the empty lobby and startled me so badly I jumped. I jammed my hands in my pockets to cover up my find, and hurried back to Bella and Mrs. Cope. Bella was trying to hide a grin and was shaking her head at me as I approached.

"Hey Em – you ready?" I asked a little too quickly, my nervousness clearly showing, but I couldn't help it. He might have been ok with me getting closer to Bella, but I was certain he wouldn't want to know specifics. Definitely not sex specifics. Catching me lifting a handful of free condoms would have been very bad news.

"Yeah – I've been waiting at the cafeteria for you guys," he said before saying a quick hello to Mrs. Cope and kissing her cheek. "We've gotta get back to the Ranch. Did you tell Eddie what we're up to today, Bella?"

"Oh crap – no!" she exclaimed. "I totally forgot in all the chaos. Everything's still going on?"

"Yeah – Charlie's worried about snow if we wait, and I guess Sue's cooked up a ton of food so it's too late to cancel," Emmett replied with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Cancel what? What's happening?" I asked. I had no idea something special had been planned.

"You're in for a real experience, Eddie," Emmett chuckled. "Cause today? We're branding bulls."

xoxoxox

The ride back to the Ranch was one of the most entertaining to date – full of stories and laughter. Every year, the entire crew at the Ranch worked together to brand cattle, give inoculations, separate the cattle as needed, and then celebrate the day's work with a huge feast.

Emmett gave me a play by play of what I was to expect. He familiarized me with some of the terms and equipment. Apparently we'd be loading the cattle into a metal contraption known as a squeeze – it'd hold the cattle in place, while a freeze brand – a registered mark that was unique to the Ranch – was applied to the cow's backside. The process sounded tough and intense, and I was incredibly nervous.

Emmett and Bella then gave me a very colourful retelling of Emmett's first experience branding cattle when he was 16. Emmett and Marcus – a past Ranch graduate – were in a hurry to get the job done. They loaded a large steer into the squeeze, but being the careless teens they were, they didn't latch it properly and the steer broke free. Bella then added that the steer – which I learned was a bull without balls – not only broke free, it chased Emmett through a fence and up a tree.

"I'm sure we're not helping to put Edward's mind at ease, eh?" Bella chuckled at Emmett from the front passenger seat.

"Nah, it's cool," I replied, doing a shitty job of hiding my fears in the back – the look on my face was a dead giveaway that I was edgy.

"Well, Eddie–" Emmett said as he caught my eye in his rear view mirror, "If it's any consolation, it didn't scare me away. I mean, I made it the Canadian Finals Rodeo for bull riding – from that day of branding on I was hooked by the rush."

"Oh yeah – I saw your picture at Bella's place. That's insane, man," I replied, shaking my head. I'd overcome my fear of horses, but I really couldn't understand why anyone would want to plant themselves on top of two thousand pounds of angry bull. They just looked mean, and there was no way in hell I'd ever consider it.

"Yeah, I was pretty crazy, but it worked for me. Helped keep me disciplined, taught me a lot about respect."

"What made you stop?" I asked.

"Rosie. It scared the shit out of her, and I didn't like making her feel like that – wasn't worth hurting someone I love. She never asked me to stop – always supported me, but I could tell it killed her. She saw me get bucked real bad once, and I just couldn't do it anymore."

"Wait – I'm not getting on any bull today, am I?" I yelled, only for Bella and Emmett to burst out laughing at me.

"Hell no, Edward!" he hooted, clutching his side with his hand that wasn't on the wheel. "Settle down. Charlie will probably push you a bit today – not on a bull, but in other ways. Just listen to him. Don't be a hero. Take your time, ask questions if you need to and you'll be fine."

xoxoxo

As soon as we arrived back at the Ranch, we all went our separate ways to get changed and ready for the day ahead, then grabbed a quick bite to eat in the kitchen. Earlier in the morning, Sam and Embry had set up the equipment we'd be using. Quil and Charlie had gone out on horseback and rounded up the cattle that we'd be branding and inoculating.

In addition to our regular group, Sue Clearwater, whom I'd been introduced to at the dance in town the night of Jake's incident, had arrived with an entire van full of food that she was busy hauling inside.

An older native man, decked out with a wide black cowboy hat and plaid shirt very similar to Charlie's, had arrived just as we were all gathering outside. Charlie introduced him as Harry, Sue's brother, and a good friend as well as neighbouring farmer. Quil, Sam and Embry all flocked to him instantly. Bella explained that Harry played a big part in working with the Aboriginal boys at the Ranch on learning and maintaining cultural beliefs and practices. It was clear that they were very close to him.

Bella and I shared a quick kiss in the pantry before she headed out to check on Eclipse and get to grooming some of the other horses. She explained that although she'd been a part of the branding process in the past, she felt that it was more of a male-bonding thing, and stepped back unless she was needed.

The branding started and ended very smoothly and wasn't nearly as frightening as I thought it would be. It was hard work, and we were moving quickly, but we'd created an assembly line of sorts and worked well as a group. The feeling of camaraderie was huge – everyone communicated really well with each other and backed one another up.

By the time we were through with the cattle, the sun was getting lower in the sky, and the guys had started packing up most of the branding equipment.

"Well done today, boys. I'm proud of the way you all worked to get this done efficiently. Now – I've got a bit of a problem over this way," Charlie said, motioning towards the pasture at the back end of the main house.

"We've got a cow in heat over here and we've gotta get her out of that pen. Now, Aro's not gonna be very happy about that," he said with a smirk, twirling the ends of his moustache a little between his fingers. The other guys nodded, listening carefully. I just stood still, not having any clue who Aro was.

"Sam, Embry and Quil – you guys take Harry back to the main house and give Sue a hand with moving the food out. Emmett and Edward – you guys are coming with me."

I followed Charlie and Emmett over to the pasture, a little ways behind. They were deep in conversation, though their voices were quiet so I couldn't make out what they were saying.

When they reached the fence, Charlie leaned over the top edge and Emmett launched himself up on the top rail and sat straddling it.

"Come on over, Eddie – Aro'd like to meet ya," Emmett said with a chuckle.

There inside the fenced pasture was Aro – a brownish-red, snorting beast the size of a car, with horns that looked like they could skewer you in seconds flat.

"So, Edward, here's the deal," Charlie started, "Bulls like Aro here? They can get real defensive when a cow's in heat and needs to be removed from "their" group. I need you to listen real close here, kid – you hear me?"

I nodded silently, swallowing hard. My palms were sweating and I was sure that if I held out my hand it would be shaking like crazy, and I didn't even know what exactly I'd be doing yet. I didn't want to look like a total coward – Emmett rode bulls, for crying out loud – but I couldn't help it. I contemplated the potential repercussions of running – taking off back to the house and saying to hell with it – but I couldn't do it. Not only would I be letting down Charlie, but I'd be letting down myself. The feeling was new, but powerful. I'd always been a fan of the easy way out – I was starting to realize how stupid that really was.

"Alright – for starters, you never handle a bull alone, and you never, ever turn your back on one. If you turn and run? He's coming after you. That's asking for it, you understand?"

"Yes, Sir," I mumbled, as I shifted my weight between my feet and fidgeted with my fingers.

"Ok. Here's what you're gonna do – You two are gonna go in there and lead the other cattle out. Emmett will be helping you. Your job is to keep your eye on Aro, so that Emmett can tend to the others. He's might snort and he might stomp, which is fine – you're gonna bring this in with you–" he said, handing me a thick cane. "Don't go in there swinging it or anything – it's just to make you seem bigger, bossier. Any questions?"

"I, uh, um, no?" I stammered, looking at my feet. The urge to bail was growing stronger and stronger. I was freaked the hell out and there was no denying it.

"Listen, son," he said, as he clamped a hand down on my shoulder. "I wouldn't put you in there if I didn't think you could handle it. Emmett knows what he's doing, and I'll be watching. We've got your back."

"Let's do this, Eddie," Emmett cheered as he hoisted himself all the way over the fence and into the pasture. I followed, a little slowly and a lot hesitant, with my cane clutched tightly in my grasp. Charlie made his way around the fence to the latched gate and pried it open.

"He can smell your fear, man. Show him your balls – I know you've got 'em. Just talk to me – we'll work this out, ok?" Emmett said quietly before he headed in the direction of the cattle.

The cattle that needed moving were on our right, Aro was standing loud and proud in the middle of the pasture, and the gate was to the left.

The next few minutes felt like hours. Emmett expertly herded the cattle close to the fence, while I held my guard in my position. The cattle fell into place with little resistance and soon were heading to the gate alongside Charlie. Aro snorted and huffed, but didn't put up much protest. As soon as the gate was closed, with the cattle on the other side, I backed slowly up to the fence and made my way over in a hurry. It wasn't until I was up on the fence climbing out that Aro started his fuss – stomping and groaning and throwing his weight around. I scrambled quickly, my feet slipping underneath me, my legs feeling miles too long. I landed in a heap on the other side and startled with a jolt upright. I was breathing heavier than I had ever breathed before and sweating buckets – but I'd made it.

"Woohoo! That was perfect, Eddie!" Emmett bellowed. "Got a little tense there at the end, eh? You did good though, man. How'd you feel?

I paused for a minute before answering, letting the adrenaline sink in a little deeper. "Well – I feel alive!" I shouted, then burst out laughing as I brushed the grass and dirt away from myself. The rush was incredible – the danger was there and it was real, but I faced it and I did a good job at it. I felt on top of the world – if I could handle this, what couldn't I handle?

"Edward!" Charlie hollered from the adjacent pen where he'd led the cows after Emmett led them out. "You did great, son. I have to say, I wasn't so sure you were gonna do it. I'm really proud of you, kid. Let's go eat!"

xoxoxoxox

We were completely finished with the cattle and heading back to the main house just as dusk was settling in. There was a light cool breeze in the air, but the weather was milder than it had been in previous days. Charlie kept mentioning that he could feel snow coming – whatever that was supposed to mean – but I was glad for the warmer night, as we'd planned to eat outside.

On the deck, large potted shrubs were dressed with tiny white Christmas lights which lit up the seating area. Two outdoor heaters flanked the deck and a stack of throw blankets was resting on top of a wicker bench seat. Two long wooden picnic tables were covered in red and white checked tablecloths and stretched down the length of the patio. Place settings were already out – everyone was just waiting on us to bring out food.

"They're back!" I heard Bella call through the patio doors, and I watched as everyone came out arms stacked high with food and supplies. On another set of tables, they laid out slow cookers full of chilli and stew, fresh buns, different kinds of salads and all the fixings.

Once the food was all arranged, Charlie called us all to pick a spot at the table before filling our plates. He spoke briefly – thanking Sue and Bella for the amazing food, and thanking Harry for joining us for the day. He then did something that surprised us all a little – he toasted us. He congratulated us all on a job well done, on our skills in working as a team, and on our ability to band together in crisis.

After Charlie's moving words, we gorged ourselves until there was nothing left but scraps. When we were finished with our meal, Bella brought out tea and coffee and an assortment of squares. I tried – and fell in love with – my first Nanaimo bar, and when no one was listening I told Bella that one day we'd take a trip to Nanaimo just for the chocolaty treats.

Harry, Sam and Embry started up a game of cards once the tables had been cleared, and Quil disappeared into the kitchen for a phone call. Emmett had his feet propped up on a wicker bench in front of the seating area, and Rose was nestled into his side with a wedding magazine propped on her knees. Sue and Charlie were sitting close, Charlie on the end of the table, and Sue on the right side – their foreheads were so close that they were almost touching.

Quil returned awhile later with his guitar on his back – and at the request of the group, performed for us all with country songs that everyone but me knew the words to – country was the only stuff Quil said he could play. He ended the night with what Bella informed me was a Travis Tritt song, "It's a Great Day to Be Alive," and it definitely fit.

After the sing-along, everyone pitched in to tidy up the deck area. The guys headed back to their places, along with Emmett and Rose. I parked myself in a comfortable, plush deck chair – my muscles already starting to ache from the heavy labour of the day. Bella ran into the kitchen and brought out a plate full of food that she must have hidden away and gave it to Charlie. I watched from across the deck as she gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and said goodnight before he and Sue headed into the house.

"Got room for me?" Bella asked playfully, before plunking herself half on my lap in the chair. "Wanna come back to my place?"

"Will that be ok? Where's Charlie going?" I asked nervously. We had had such a good day – I didn't want to blow it by getting caught sneaking around.

"He's taking that plate to Jasper, and then taking Sue home. He'll be at least a few hours – you can probably guess why," she said as she scrunched up her nose.

"Ha! I knew he was tapping that!" I teased as Bella swatted at me.

"Shut up, Edward. I'm happy for him, actually. Sue's awesome – they're a good fit."

"That's good, I'm just bugging you. So, your place?" I asked.

"Yeah–" she said softly as she dropped her hand to my thigh and started tracing her fingers up the inside of my leg, "If you're not too tired."

"Oh hell no," I groaned, "I'll meet you there in 10 minutes."

As I watched Bella slip inside the patio door and slide it closed, I could feel my heart pounding in the back of my throat and my neck and cheeks heating up. If we were on the same page – which I figured we were – this day was quickly about to become one of the best I'd ever had. I quickly rose from my chair and flew inside, taking the stairs to my room three at a time. I dug through the pockets of my discarded jeans on the floor, dug out my "find" from earlier, and was off to Bella's for what I hoped would be one of the best nights of my life.

**Thank you so much for reading – I always love to hear your thoughts. The next chapter will be finished in a few days – I won't keep you waiting long! ;)**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N Thanks to my awesome beta Robzbeanie and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91 – I'm lucky to have you guys! xoxo **

I took off to Bella's place in a full out sprint. As I leaped up her steps, I took a moment to calm myself down before I barged through her door and started humping her leg. Although I had assumed Bella had sex on the brain tonight, seeing as how she did invite me over with hours of freedom ahead, knowing I had snuck a handful of condoms from the Health Fair – a favourite lesson of Carlisle's popped right into my mind – "When you assume, you make an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'me.'" I needed to get a hold of myself and follow her lead.

It wasn't until I started turning the doorknob that I realized how badly I reeked. My jeans were caked with dirt down my calves and up my thighs, and I could smell the sweat off myself. My forearms beneath my sweater had streaks of dirt running down them – I at least had the decency to wash up my hands before dinner – but I was in no way presentable. In my eagerness, hygiene apparently lost priority. Thinking fast, I opted to see if Bella would join me to shower like we had the night before.

As I opened the door, I knocked softly with the back of my knuckles and spotted Bella on the couch. She had her backed turned to me, her knees bent and hugged to her chest, her ear pressed to her cellphone.

"I know, Mom. I'm not an idiot," she said softly into the receiver.

"No! Dad doesn't know yet – Yes, I'm gonna tell him. Soon," she sighed as she glanced over her shoulder at me, and mouthed a "hey" before holding up her finger for me to wait a second.

"Ok. I know. I love you, too. I've gotta go. Yes, I'll tell him. Bye, Mom. Yes, bye!" she chuckled as she hung up.

"Your mom?" I asked cheekily as I kicked off my boots.

"Yes, how'd you know?" Bella giggled. "I haven't talked to her in a while – it was of great importance for her to tell me the ins and outs of pottery class. Want anything to drink?"

"No, I'm good for now – I uh, I kinda stink."

"Eww – you do!" Bella said with a sniff. "I thought you were at least gonna shower first. Eager, much?" she asked me with a cocked eyebrow and a giant grin on her face.

"Eager for what?" I teased, playing dumb.

"You know what," she said, rolling her eyes at me.

"Say it!"

"No!"

"Fine," I said, as I leapt across the room at her and grabbed her wrist, pulling her into a tight bear hug against my chest.

"No, Edward! You're gonna get your gross all over me!" she hollered and squirmed, though she wasn't fighting me off very hard.

"That's the plan," I joked, as I rubbed the arms of my sweater all over her. "Maybe I just don't want to shower alone."

"You could have just asked me!" she shrieked, breaking free.

"Fine then. Come with me?" I asked, putting on my best pout.

She froze for a minute in contemplation before she looked up at me coyly, while nibbling on her lip, and muttered, "Of course."

xoxoxoxo

From behind the shower curtain I could barely make out Bella's silhouette in the dimly lit bathroom. I had quickly stripped and jumped under the water, while Bella took her time at the sink. She appeared to be flossing her teeth.

"Bella? You coming?" I called out, as I scrubbed shampoo thoroughly through my hair. I'd already scrubbed the rest of me almost completely raw in an attempt to remove the stench of cow and crap. When she didn't answer me, I rinsed my face clean, turned around and smacked right into her – slightly damp and completely naked.

"Hey," she said softly, as her eyes met mine, her expression serious. The atmosphere in the room had shifted – what started out as an evening of joking and fun was now getting real quickly.

"You look–" I started, but couldn't finish. I grabbed Bella by the arms and brought her close against my chest, my soapy hands sliding easily across her dewy skin. Our lips smashed together, and we both stumbled slightly on the slippery tub floor. I pressed Bella's back against the wall of the tub and anchored my thigh between her legs to keep her steady.

"I've been waiting for this," Bella sighed as she tipped her head back and squeezed her eyes closed. I took that as my cue to proceed, and brought my still-soapy hand up to her breast. Her nipple was already tight, and as my fingers grazed it she let out a soft moan.

I nipped at Bella's throat, trailing my lips up and down just beneath her ear where I knew she liked it most. As I continued across her collarbone, I felt her fingers on my hips drawing little circles, moving closer and closer to what was now my raging hard on.

"Can I?" she breathed huskily in my ear.

"Uh, yeah – but Bella," I groaned out. "If we do this here, I'm not gonna last," I admitted sheepishly. It was true though, and I wanted to be the best I could be for Bella and make tonight special. It wasn't gonna happen though, if we spent much more time wet and slippery in her shower feeling each other up.

"Ok," she sighed as she ran her fingertips along my length. "Then hurry up and get out of here."

Moments later, I was alone in Bella's room with a fluffy white towel wrapped around my waist. She had told me to go ahead and get comfy while she finished up in the bathroom, and there I was debating what exactly I was supposed to do with myself. Did I put on my boxers? My dirty pants and boxers? Get on the bed? Stay off the bed? Light a candle? I was clueless, as usual.

I had been with a couple of girls – not as many as the guys back home may have been led to believe – but I wasn't a complete newb. What I was completely new at though was making sex exceptional. Anything more than a drunken roll around in a buddy's parents' bed was new territory for me. I was torn up – while my nerves were attempting to kill my boner, my excitement for being with Bella was building again at a rapid pace. I opted to mess with my hair in front of her mirror in an attempt to look busy and waited for her return.

A matter of minutes later, Bella cleared her throat from the doorway – covered in only a matching white towel wrapped up underneath her arms, with her hair neatly combed back. I'd felt myself twitch beneath my towel at the mere sight of her – the soft light of the bedside lamp was the only source in the room and it lit her skin up so well that she looked like she was glowing.

"Sorry to keep you waiting," Bella said softly, as she leaned against the doorframe. She dragged the toes of her right foot slowly up her left calf before making an awkward half step forward. Apparently I wasn't the only one feeling a little unsure. Unlike me – who was still just standing there – Bella found a burst of confidence and took a few quick strides over to her bed. She swung her legs up and leaned her back against her headboard, tucking her towel in around her.

"S'ok, " I murmured, shuffling my way to the other side of the bed. I hesitated a moment before sitting just on the edge of the mattress. All of the nervousness I'd been feeling earlier quickly bubbled back to the surface. My palms were sweating and I felt like I was going to puke. This wasn't at all how I had planned this. I paused on the edge of the mattress, thinking a minute of quiet would help to calm me down.

"Edward?" Bella asked from her spot. "Why are you being weird?" she giggled nervously.

"I'm not," I snapped quickly, then sighed. "Ok – I am. I'm just nervous, I guess."

"You've done this before, right?" she said, eyeing me curiously.

"Um, yeah – but not like this," I replied quietly, unable to meet her eyes. I could feel my chest heating up and my ears turning red.

"What do you mean not like this?" she asked as she moved herself closer to my back.

"I just – I care about you. A lot. And I care about how this goes. I want it to be good. For you," I sighed, feeling both awkward and exposed.

"Hey–" she said as she tugged on my shoulder to get me to face her. "I'm nervous too, but I want this with you more than I ever have. I want to remember it when you go, and who knows when the next chance will be. We're thinking about this way too much – come here," she said, as she slid her finger along the top of her towel just above her breasts, releasing the fuzzy terry material and exposing her perfect perky breasts to me. "Let's just enjoy this, ok?"

I nodded and twisted myself around to face her. I cradled her chin in my hand, tilting her mouth towards mine, and parted her lips gently with my tongue. Bella met my lips, drawing herself closer to me so our chests were pressed together. Any anxiety I had melted away as our kiss deepened – Bella was right – I was overthinking something that didn't have to be overthought.

When my hand cupped her breast again, and Bella's head tilted back with a winded moan, I knew I was on the right track. I guided Bella back towards the headboard, my hands and mouth keeping constant contact with her neck and chest as I situated myself right between her legs. I sat up on my knees and pulled the towels – one that was still loosely covering Bella's bottom half and the other that was wrapped around my waist – to the side and tossed them in a quick motion to Bella's bedroom floor.

Bella had propped herself up on her elbows, and I watched as her eyes went wide as they swept across my chest, down my torso and between my legs. I took the chance to do the same to her – the sight of her was nothing short of amazing – her damp hair was fanned out across her pillow and her nipples stood out, tight and rosy, against her pale creamy skin. Her legs were spread just enough to give me a glimpse of the soft pink skin between them.

"You're beautiful," I whispered, saying my thoughts aloud.

"You're sweet," she giggled back, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth. "And hot," she murmured, squirming a little beneath my gaze. I watched in awe as her thighs rubbed together and her fingertips softly trailed up her stomach and over her breasts.

I couldn't take the suspense anymore. I had to have her.

I flopped down along Bella's side, and like a magnet, she pulled right towards me – our legs tangling together, her hands moving over my shoulders and across my back. I dropped my hand from her side, down to her lower back and then cupped her ass firmly, giving it a playful squeeze.

Under the pressure of my palm, Bella pressed her hips closer to mine, clearly seeking friction. I slid my hand over her hip, and brought my fingers straight to the slick skin between her thighs. As soon as I made contact with her, Bella gasped into my mouth, tensing then relaxing beside me.

The moans and sighs Bella released while I circled my fingers around her most sensitive spots were almost my undoing. I pressed my erection into her mattress, trying my hardest to keep my attention on her.

"Edward?" she huffed, her head tipped back in pleasure.

"Yeah, babe?" I asked, as I kept up my movements and placed little kisses along her ear.

"Can you – uhn – get the condom?"

Those words were music to my ears. I jumped off the bed in what had to be record time and practically leapt over to my discarded pants. I pulled the condom from my pocket and carefully tore the wrapper open. I willed myself to slow down, yet again, and made my way back to the bedside before I pulled it from the wrapper.

"Give it here," Bella said with a grin, as she sat up and plucked it from my fingers. She gripped my length firm in the palm of her hand, catching me completely off guard and causing a deep moan to erupt from my chest. She pumped her fist a few times, slow and firm, before unrolling the condom along my almost painful erection.

Once Bella had me completely covered by the thin barrier, she scooted herself back on the bed, propped herself up on her elbows and dropped her knees wide apart. I swallowed hard, taking in the sight of her before me, and crawled between her thighs. As I lined myself up with her, the heat radiating from between her legs was intense and caused what felt like an electric shock to run right through me.

"Are you ready?" I whispered in Bella's ear, my arms trembling as I tried my best to hold back a few more moments.

"So ready," she whimpered, as she laced the fingers of her right hand in mine. I kissed her square on the lips, then buried my face in her hair as I slid inside her. I could already feel the familiar pressure building in my groin, signalling that my orgasm was near, so I stopped for a moment to compose myself.

"More," Bella moaned softly as she kissed and nipped at my neck, driving me further insane. She was so tight and warm, and in that moment every feeling I had for her felt magnified 100 times over.

I pressed my hips firmly, filling Bella completely. Her hips were moving in tiny circles beneath me, anticipating my move. I gave myself a minute to adjust to the overwhelmingly intense feeling, then started to slowly thrust my hips in a slow but steady rhythm.

"Oh my God," I groaned into Bella's shoulder, never ever having felt anything more incredible.

"So good–" Bella huskily whispered back.

I tried to think of random things – baseball, calculus, cow shit – but I couldn't pull my thoughts far enough away to decrease the pressure in my groin that was now almost at a boiling point. Thankfully, Bella's whimpers and purrs were alerting me that she wasn't far behind me.

"Mmm, I'm close," Bella whispered in my ear, as I felt her slide her hand between us. As her fingers worked their way across her pelvis, I felt her make a few lazy circles against her clit before dipping them lower and gliding them along the length of my cock just outside of her entrance. The feeling was unbearably intense – my eyes rolled back in my head and I bit down on forearm in an attempt to keep it together.

"Oh God – me too," I choked, teetering on the edge but knowing that with Bella so close behind me, I could wait. I had to.

Just as Bella's fingers made their way back up to her clit, she pulled her knees up high, deepening our connection and intensifying the sensation to a whole other level. Bella clearly felt the shift – her thrusts to meet me became quicker and harder, the circles she was tracing over her most sensitive spots had become faster and firmer. I pulled my weight up on one arm, and hooked Bella's knee under my free elbow, increasing the angle that seemed to drive Bella wild.

That did it.

"Edward – I'm gonna – I'm–" Bella moaned, her breath coming in ragged gasps. I could feel her squeeze every inch of me inside, her muscles spasming and contracting – a sensation so incredible that it could never be mimicked.

Like a wave of hot water, my own orgasm hit me fast and furious. I was too overwhelmed to even speak – a bunch of grunts and groans were all I was able to muster. Unable to even lift my head up – everything felt heavy – I brushed the few stray hairs from Bella's face and rolled a little to the side, relieving her of my weight.

"That was so–"

"Short?" I groaned into the pillow just above Bella's shoulder.

"No! Don't you ruin this – it was awesome," she sighed, her voice dreamy, her breaths still deep.

"It was awesome. You're awesome," I chuckled, brushing my nose against her cheek. She brought a hand to my chin and kissed me softly. "Go get rid of that, but come back quick – I wanna snuggle!" Bella instructed, motioning at my crotch. With rubbery legs, I made my way to the bathroom, then went straight back to bed with my girl.

The rest of our evening together was spent chatting and cuddling in Bella's bed. Although I was tempted for a repeat performance, we were both exhausted after the demanding day we'd had and I didn't want to push it. When it came time for me to head back, I felt a real physical ache in the pit of my stomach. I didn't want to go, but I had to, and I hated it. I questioned how I was going to be able to do it – if leaving Bella's cabin for the evening felt that bad, how would leaving her for months feel?

The cold air on my way back to the main house gave me a second burst of energy. I noticed that Charlie's truck still wasn't parked in his usual spot, which was excellent news. Bella was always careful, but we had both been completely distracted. Not wanting to push my luck, I headed straight past a snoring Emmett – who'd passed out in the comfy lounge chair in the living room – and made my way to my room.

I decided on a quick shower – another of the tension-relieving variety – to put my mind and body at ease for the night, but the sight of a light on in Jasper's room stopped me. Knowing that there was no way Jasper would be home yet, I peeked my head inside his door, and was startled at the chaos inside. When I first moved to the Ranch, Jasper had made it clear that he didn't like anyone messing with his stuff, so I'd never gone in his room out of respect for his privacy.

I was shocked by the state of the place – the entire room was dishevelled. His bed was unmade and rumpled, as if someone had been playing "royal rumble" on it like my friends and I used to back home as kids. A glass of water lay dumped on its side, the carpet below it forming a nice damp spot. A short bookshelf had been knocked to the ground, and a stack of papers was fanned out across the floor – the book "Psychology Today" lay open amongst them.

Regardless of the fact that Jasper didn't want people touching his stuff, I knew that no matter what, he wouldn't want to come home to this. Constant reminders of the shitty state he was in were all over this place, and I knew that if it was me, I would have appreciated a hand.

I quickly stripped the sheets from Jasper's mattress and tossed them in our hamper just outside his door. I straightened up the piles of papers, without looking at them, and stood the bookshelf up, righting the books. Lastly, I emptied his trash and removed the dishes to my room to be brought down in the morning. It wasn't a thorough clean, but a decent tidy, and I felt better knowing that Jasper's room was ready for him.

From Jasper's room, I went straight to the shower, allowing myself a little extra hot water for my aching muscles, as well as the chance to revisit my earlier experiences with Bella. My own handiwork was nothing in comparison to actually being with Bella, but reliving the memories was the next best thing.

After my shower I quickly ran a comb through my hair and brushed my teeth. I turned off the water, and just as I hit the hallway, I heard Charlie come through the front door. I could tell it was him by the clicking of his boots in the entryway – but something was different. Charlie – serious, no-nonsense Chief Charlie Swan, was whistling – and it was a happy tune at that.

The next morning I woke up stiff and seriously sore. Every single muscle I had – and I few I didn't even know existed ached. Luckily for me, my morning was to be spent on the chickens and therapy with Rose, so I could relax a little.

"We need to talk about your return home, Edward," Rosalie began, jumping right to the thick of things in our session. She'd met me in the kitchen just as I was finishing up my oatmeal with maple syrup – my new favourite breakfast food – and told me that we'd be getting right to business.

"Ok – what about it?" I asked.

"Well – we need to nail down some details. I talked to your uncle about work arrangements, and apparently the school in your area isn't too keen on having you volunteer this semester," she sighed. I was instantly furious. The principal had never liked me, and he had good enough reason, but I'd changed. The fact that he wouldn't even give me a chance really burned.

"That's bullshit," I murmured, pissed off but trying my hardest not to lose my cool. "Did he say why?"

"Language, Edward – and sort of. What he told Carlisle is that he'd like to see some good behaviour from you first. If you can prove to him – an active member of the community – that you've made some positive changes, he'll gladly welcome you on next semester as an assistant coach. Not all bad, right?"

"I guess not," I sighed. I had really been looking forward to getting started on the volunteer work when I got home. It gave me something to look forward to. "What will I be doing then?" I asked.

"Well, Carlisle has made arrangements with the hospital custodian for you to return to your cleaning job for a while when you get back."

"What? I hated that job – it was a joke, Rose," I groaned, scrubbing my face hard in my hands. I couldn't believe this was happening. The hospital job was a crock – I basically flirted with Ms. Mallory and got away with murder.

"Why don't you give it a try for a few weeks, while keeping your eyes open for other opportunities? You never know, Edward – good behaviour opens up a lot of doors. Anyway – I have something else that I'd like to talk about today with you."

"What's that?" I huffed, still dwelling on the job issue.

"Your friends back home," she stated. "Have you talked to any of them at all since you've been here?"

"No. I haven't really had time or wanted to," I replied. Since I'd arrived at the Ranch, I'd checked my cell phone occasionally for texts from Esme in the days before I started phoning them, but other than that I kept it off. Two weeks into my stay, Mike had sent me a picture of some girl's cleavage with the words "Fuck Yeah" typed out beneath it. I deleted it and never bothered responding. I hadn't heard anything since.

"Do you plan on hanging around with your old friends when you get home?" she questioned.

"I guess so – I mean, I haven't really thought about it," I replied honestly. How things with my old buddies would work really wasn't something I'd given any thought to – I'd been so focused on Bella, the guys here, and the work I'd been doing, that my old friends back home just didn't seem that important anymore.

"Well, this might surprise you, but I'm not going to tell you not to. What I am going to tell you is to be very cautious. Do you think it would be in your best interest to keep the same company?" she asked, and I could tell she was using one of her "doctor" tactics – making me find the answers.

"Probably not, but I don't know anyone else," I replied carefully, trying to wrap my brain around the situation I was soon going to be facing. The guys would expect the same old Edward back – but I wasn't who they thought I was anymore.

"And what about the parties? And girls – do you have anyone that you were involved with?" Rose continued, making my anxiety grow further and further with each bomb she dropped. Thing was – these things weren't new. I'd just shoved them aside and created a bubble here where that stuff didn't belong. It was easy to not focus on it when I was so far removed, but soon, I wouldn't be so far away.

"No, no girls. There won't be any, either," I mumbled.

"Dating can be a good, positive thing, Edward. It could be a way for you to meet some new people, too. You could start building some healthy relationships in a healthy way," she said excitedly – obviously liking this plan. Clearly, Emmett hadn't spilled the beans yet to Rose about Bella and me.

"No. I'm not – I just don't want to think about this right now, ok?" I snapped, then felt immediately guilty.

"Ok. It's overwhelming, isn't it?" she said softly, which made me feel even worse. Rose was nothing but supportive and she didn't need me getting ugly on her.

"It is. I'm sorry – I just need some time to think about this stuff."

"It's ok, Edward. I can tell that you're tense," she said, almost hitting the nail on the head. There was more to it – my new relationship with Bella that was going to quickly change, my work and volunteer plans, how I was going to work with or avoid my friends at home – these issues that I was facing were all coming at me at the same time, and although I was tense, tension wasn't the bulk of my problem.

"I am tense, but more than anything, Rose – I'm really just scared."

**Thanks so much for reading and reviewing – I love to hear your thoughts! If you didn't receive a review reply last chapter, I apologize – has been moody, but hopefully this time things will go smoother. The next chapter will be up in a week or two! Xoxo **


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N Major thanks to my awesome beta, Robzbeanie, and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91 for all of their help. Without further delay – Enjoy! **

They say that time flies when you're having fun, but when you're desperately stretching every minute out, begging for time to stand still, it only seems to move faster.

My final few days at the Ranch were trying. I was struggling with Bella, who'd started to somewhat shut down. It wasn't noticeable to the naked eye, but I could feel it. After our intimate night at her cabin, we'd exchanged kisses, we'd held hands when we could get away with it, but things were different – more reserved. An invisible protective barrier had been put up between us. We both knew how good we were together – how incredible it was – but neither of us initiated sex again.

Speaking for myself, I was afraid. With Bella, sex was so much more than the mechanics, and putting myself out there – exposing my vulnerability – was something I just couldn't bring myself to do, no matter how bad the voice in my pants wanted it.

"Come on, old girl," I called out to Eclipse. I'd gotten her all prepared for a walk through the pasture. She'd been making a speedy recovery, but was still considered out of commission for riding. The fact that I was even comfortable taking Eclipse out on my own was a victory in itself. Bella had given me the rundown on what I needed to do, and I did it. After my experience with Aro, though, it seemed pretty silly to be terrified of such a passive creature.

As Eclipse and I wandered along the tree line, we passed the spot in the bush where Jasper and I saw the moose and calf at the beginning of my stay. It made me think not only of my friend, but of how far I'd come since then. I was open to revisiting my past, aware of my troubles, and willing to change so I could move forward. For someone who was so resistant, I definitely felt that I could be proud of what I had accomplished in such a short time. I'd made a friend in Jasper, who was an inspiration – all of the guys at the Ranch were – and I vowed to myself to keep in contact with them, just as Charlie and Carlisle had.

Back at the Ranch, in the early afternoon, I started packing my bag for home. Bella had given me the heads up that they'd be hosting my graduation dinner and bonfire – a tradition for guys who were leaving the Ranch – that evening, so I was supposed to have everything prepared ahead of time.

As I folded my jeans, I couldn't help but notice the rips, tears and dark mud stains that even heavy washes would never remove. They reminded me of more of my accomplishments – the rank ass chicken coop, working the machinery getting in the crops, moving cattle – stuff that I would have never dreamed I'd ever do.

A soft knock at the door snapped me out of my head.

"Hey, man–" a familiar, yet kind of unfamiliar voice said. It was Seth.

"Hey, Eddie – get the hell out of here. I'm moving in!" he beamed, a wide grin on his face. He had a beat-up old duffel bag slung across his shoulder – it was clear that he didn't own much.

"Geez, they're filling my shoes this quickly? I'm not even gone til tomorrow!" I huffed, only half kidding.

"Nah, man – I'm just bugging you. I'm here, but I'm staying in the den until you're actually out," he said as he paced around the floor, taking in the space. "I think I can get used to this."

"It's a little tight, but it works," I replied as I stuffed my shirts into my already jammed suitcase.

"Tight? Are you crazy?" he laughed, as he flopped down on my bed. "I shared a room with 10-year-old twins at the foster home, man. You should've seen them fight over my ratty ass old blanket – I seriously thought they were gonna split it in two!"

I chuckled at him and shook my head, jamming the zipper on my bag shut. I was truly happy for Seth that he was here, but in a way it was bittersweet. His being here meant there was no room left for me. That was selfish and stupid of me to think that way, but I couldn't help it. This place had become a home away from home – a home I actually felt at home in.

"You coming to the fire tonight?" I asked him as I shut the drawers of my dresser and hoisted my bulging luggage on top.

"No, I've got a meeting with Harry tonight. We're doing a sweat ceremony – I think my cousins are coming over after everything is done here with you. Sorry, man – wish I could say a real goodbye. I like you, you know?"

"Thanks, kid – I like you, too. And I'm glad you're here. It's a good place."

"I know, man," he said, as he looked off in the distance out my window. "I'm lucky."

Seth and I spent an hour or so playing cards and catching up. We talked about school, but mostly about sports. I was hoping that now that Seth had arrived at the Ranch, he'd take up a sport or two under Emmett or Charlie's guidance. The kid had natural athletic ability, and hopefully getting involved more seriously than just the weekly sports day would help to keep him out of trouble.

The smell of garlic, onions and spices filled the hallways of the main house, and seemed to bring the other guys in by their noses. Bella was working on pasta in the kitchen – the same meal we'd had when I first arrived – and I couldn't wait to dig in. Although it wasn't the top of my list of things I'd miss, Bella's cooking was something I would definitely dream about. Sam and Quil had joined Seth and me for a game of dominoes at the dining room table, and I noticed that as everyone came in and out they were filling out a little slip of paper and tossing it into a bowl. When I asked Bella what they were up to, she brushed me off with a "don't worry about it," and it was forgotten.

As we sat down to eat, the only sounds in the dining room where those of forks clattering, the slurping sound of everyone sucking up their pasta and heavy chew-breathing. The other guys were hunched over their plates inhaling the pasta and sauce, while Bella and Rose picked at theirs in a much more civilized manner. I sat back and watched everyone – the aching in my chest growing bigger as I realized this was my last big dinner here like this.

"Save any for me?" a deep male voice called out from around the corner, drawing everyone's eyes up from their plates.

"Oh my gosh! Jasper!" Bella called out, leaping up from her seat and grabbing him in a bear hug as he rounded the corner. I couldn't believe it – he'd made it back.

"You look great – I'm so glad you're here," she said, pulling away just as Alice quietly appeared behind him. The look on Bella's face was priceless – she was stunned, but couldn't contain her grin.

"Hey, guys," Alice said with a small wave to the group.

"Hey, Bells, guys. We're starving," he said with a happy, but somewhat nervous grin. "Think you can make room for two more?"

"For you, son, any day. Get on over here," Charlie mumbled with a mouth half full of garlic toast. "And Alice – it's nice to see you, dear. Make yourself comfortable."

The rest of our meal was spent catching up with Jasper and filling him in on the goings on around the Ranch. He filled everyone in on his situation – he was trying new medication and working regularly with Rose as well as a psychiatrist from the city. He was going to be monitored closely, but was allowed to return to the Ranch now that he was no longer considered a danger to himself.

Bella dragged Alice off to "help" in the kitchen, but it was pretty obvious that she was digging for the scoop. I strained my ears to listen in – eavesdropping was a special talent of mine – but was only able to make out the sounds of happy giggles.

Sam and Charlie headed outside to get the fire started while everyone worked to clear the table and help with dish duty. Quil had tackled Jasper with an armload of bubbles as a welcome home surprise, earning him the job of pot-scrubber for the evening, while Emmett got busted shovelling plastic leftovers containers into his backpack to take home.

After cleanup, we all bundled up in our warmest clothes. Bella had tracked me down an extra set of mitts and a toque, as the temperature had plummeted significantly in the last few days. The roaring bonfire was visible through the kitchen window, and I was thankful – at least the heat of the flames would help to keep us warm.

Outside, we gathered around the large, round fire pit that we had sat beside many times throughout my stay. I looked back on my memories of my first fire – where Bella was nervous to sit with me because of Jake, and Jasper was so excited for foil packs – and thought of how much had changed since then.

"Alright, guys–" Charlie called out, getting everyone's attention. "As you guys know, Edward here is leaving us tomorrow to head back home, and it's tradition for us to have a farewell fire. So here's how this works, Edward. Everyone has created a wish for you – an intention, something they hope you aspire towards," he said, clearing his throat. That explained the slips of paper from earlier. "We're gonna pass the bowl around the circle and read the wishes out loud for you. Got it?"

"Um, yes, Sir," I mumbled, stuffing my gloved hands into my pockets uncomfortably. It made me feel weird to be in the spotlight like that – I was getting fidgety under the attention. The bowl with the paper slips was passed around, and everyone removed the one that belonged to them, while shivering and bobbing a little on the spot in hopes of warming up.

"I'll go first," Sam called out. "I wish you a safe trip home, Edward, and that you find a place amongst good company," he read out, then tossed his paper slip into the fire pit.

"I wish for you to help others at home like you've helped out guys here. Don't let it end with the Ranch," Embry read quietly, then like Sam, tossed his paper in the fire.

"Thanks, guys," I nodded from my place, stepping back and forth from foot to foot in an attempt to get the chill out of my jeans. Emmett was up next.

"Let me see…" he said, jokingly trying to read his messy chicken scratch. "Ok…I wish for you to acknowledge every little bit of potential you have and use it, Edward. Also – what does this say…oh, yeah – cut your hair, and quit smoking!" he chuckled, and everyone laughed softly along with him. Although he was joking around, I knew there was a lot of heart put into his message, and that felt pretty good.

"My turn," Rose said softly, much more serious. "I wish for you to build on your relationship with your parents, while you allow yourself to embrace and hold close to you all that was good in your past."

I nodded at her with a smile and swallowed hard. The kind words from everyone were starting to choke me up, but I was working hard to hide it. Quil was bouncing in place, looking eager for his turn.

"I wish that you find someone half as cool as me to hang out with!" he laughed, earning a soft swat from Bella.

"I don't know if that's possible," I chuckled, rolling my eyes at him.

"Me? I didn't know we–" Alice mumbled nervously, as her turn came up next. "Whatever – I'll make one up," she giggled. "I, um, I wish you a safe trip, health and happiness. Oh! And love. Lots of love," she added with a wink. I gave her a smirk in return.

"My wish, " Jasper began, "is for you to keep in touch. Don't be a stranger, man. A good friend is hard to find."

"I won't. Thank you," I replied. I glanced up at Bella who was next. She looked incredibly uncomfortable, rubbing her mitts along her forearms vigorously.

"I wish that you…." she paused, clearing her throat and crumpling up her paper. "I wish that you will keep working with animals. You're good at it," she mumbled, kicking at the ground a little with her boot. Something wasn't right, I could feel it. I got a strong urge to wrap her up in a hug, and not being able to act on that physically hurt.

"I'm gonna try," I nodded, smiling up at her, but she wouldn't meet my eyes.

"That leaves me," Charlie said, as he side-eyed Bella, watching her fidget. He took a step forward towards me and clasped a heavy hand on my shoulder. Unlike the rest of us, Charlie showed no sign of being affected by the cold – he wasn't even wearing an actual coat.

"My wish for you, son, is to go forward – keep learning from your mistakes. Connect with those who love and care for you, and show them – don't tell them – all the good you have done. Celebrate your accomplishments, Edward – there are many."

"Thank you, Sir – and all you guys. I'm really gonna miss it here," I said with as much sincerity as I could muster.

"Ok – enough of the sappy stuff – I want cookies!" Emmett bellowed. He headed for the steps, and we all followed. I lingered back a bit, hoping Bella would wait for me, but she carried on ahead in a hurry.

Back inside, we all gathered again in the dining room with mugs of hot cocoa and chocolate chip cookies. Sam, Embry and Quil were planning on heading out to join Seth at Harry's, but decided to stick around for a quick game of cards first, and a chance to warm up. The game the guys chose was "Asshole" and Quil found it awfully funny that I was stuck firm in the "Asshole" seat. Even Charlie joined in, taking over Sam's spot when he had to leave for a phone call.

The girls had been chatting in the kitchen while we were busy at cards, but as the game wound down, they came to peek over our shoulders and see what we were up to. Bella pulled up beside me and glanced at my cards, and I tried catching her attention by mouthing a quick "Are you ok?" between hands, but I was met with a quick nod, an "uh huh," and nothing more. I knew that I needed to somehow get her alone – there was no way I was leaving this place with the confusion and tension still between us.

"Edward?" Sam called out from the hallway, as he made his way to the table. "You got a minute? The phone's for you." I assumed that either Esme or Carlisle had beeped in – probably to get details on my arrival.

"Yeah, man. I'll go grab it." I quickly dashed to Charlie's office and picked up the heavy receiver.

"Hey!" I said, expecting to hear my parents' voices on the other line. "I was gonna call–"

"I doubt that," a slightly hoarse voice said on the other line. "It's Jake."

"Oh," I said coolly, completely caught off guard. "Well…what can I do for you?" I replied sarcastically. I was angry with him still, and talking to him in my limited time left wasn't my idea of a good time.

"I know you don't want to talk to me – but just hear me out, ok?"

"Fine – go," I huffed.

"I'm supposed to call you – it's part of my steps here in rehab, to right my wrongs. You don't have to forgive me, but I want you to know I am sorry. Even if I didn't have to do this, I would, because it's right. I was jealous, and fucked-up, and you were an easy target. I'm sorry."

I took a minute to process his apology. He sounded genuine, and for the Jake I knew to call me up and lay himself out like that, it had to be a big deal for him.

"Hello? You there?" he asked, sounding pretty sure that I'd hung up.

"Yeah. I am." I paused. "It's cool, I guess. I appreciate the apology. You don't only owe me one, though," I replied, thinking of Bella, Quil, Charlie – everyone left behind that his actions affected.

"I know. I talk to the other guys a lot, and I still need to talk to Bella, but I knew you were leaving. I wanted to catch you before you did."

"Ok. Make sure you do that."

"I will. I doubt you really care, but things are going ok here – I'm in a sober-living house, and I got a job at a garage."

"That's good. I'm glad it's working out."

"Yeah, me too. I'll let you get back though, man – did they do your fire?" he asked.

"Just finished. "

"Well, I've got a wish for you, too, man. I wish for you to take everything that you have, and use it. It's a little late for me, Edward, but it isn't for you. I would kill to be in your shoes."

"I don't think it's ever too late, but thanks. I've gotta run, Jake."

"K, man. Take it easy."

I hung up the phone in shock. I never thought I'd speak to Jake again, let alone get an apology from him. It took maturity for him to do the right thing like that, and though I doubted we would actually ever be friends, I could respect him for having the balls to make things right.

Back in the kitchen, Bella was washing up the last of the cocoa mugs, her hands deep in the soapy sink. Emmett and Rose were tidying up the table and cards, and Alice and Jasper were sitting close, flipping through a magazine. I assumed the others had left.

"You'll never believe what just happened," I said to Bella, startling her a little.

"You got me – what?" she said, focusing on the ceramic mug in her hands. She was avoiding my eyes again and I didn't like it.

"That was Jake. He actually apologized," I said, grabbing a dishrag to help her dry.

"Really? Wow. That's good though, you deserve one," she replied softly.

"Are you ok?" I whispered, reaching out for her elbow. "Something's weird."

"Yeah. I'm just–"

"Ok folks!" Charlie bellowed from around the corner, sending me quickly back a foot or so from Bella. "It's just about time to call it a night here, eh? I'll be in my office – Edward, make sure your alarm is set for early tomorrow – I'll be up to say farewell, but Emmett will be taking you to the station. Have a good night, everyone!" he called out, then disappeared again as quickly as he came.

"Edward – look!" Bella said, a grin that I'd been dying to see spread across her face as she looked out the kitchen window. "It's snowing!"

Sure enough, thick feathery snowflakes were falling from the sky – the chill in the air brisk enough to keep them fully formed as they hit the ground.

"Come outside?" Bella smiled up at me, drying her hands on my towel. "Just for a minute?"

"Of course," I answered, fast on her heels as she led us out the back doors. The cold breeze stung, but I didn't care – small price to pay for a few minutes alone.

"It's beautiful, eh? The first snowfall always is," she sighed, stuffing her hands in her pockets. The fluffy flakes were starting to gather on the top of her head.

"You're beautiful," I said, rubbing my hands along her forearms. "Can we talk? Please? I know something's wrong – it's killing me."

"And you're sweet," she smirked, leaning into my chest. "I'm just sad, Edward. I'm gonna miss you so much. I know I've been weird – trying to wrap my head around you going is so hard."

"I know," I paused, kissing her forehead quickly. "I don't know how I'm gonna do this, but we'll be ok, ok?" I said, landing another kiss on her rosy nose. She raised her chin to mine, and when our lips met, I felt a warmth spread through me.

"Ok. I keep telling myself that, and I know we'll try. I had another wish for you, ya know," she said, her cheeks flushing slightly.

"I hoped so! Animals? That's all you got for me?" I teased, wrapping her tight in my arms.

"I'm sorry – I froze!" she chuckled in defense. "My real wish? Is that you'll do everything that you need to do to be the best person that you can be." She paused to press back slightly, locking eyes with mine. I noticed her eyes filling, her bottom lip starting to tremble, and it broke me.

"Bella – no. Don't cry," I said, feeling a thick lump rising in the back of my throat.

"Wait, I'm not done," she whispered, obviously holding in a sob. "And I wish – that while you are away?" she paused again, taking a deep breath, holding back her tears, blinking furiously to keep them at bay. "That even after you go, and get settled in at home, that you won't forget me."

"Bella–" I said, taking her chin in my hands, desperate for her to understand, "I could never, ever, forget you. I love you. There is no possible way." I kissed her firmly, registering the heavy words I had just spoken after they were already out of my mouth. Though I was surprised with my forwardness, I knew I meant it. There was no question.

Bella pulled back gently, her lips still trembling beneath mine, and wiped away a few escaped tears. "I, um– "

"It's ok," I sighed, embarrassed that I had overwhelmed her in our already emotional moment. "I blurted that out, but I meant it. I know it's soon, but I do, Bella. I love you, and I need you to know that when I'm gone."

"No – it's not that. I feel the same, Edward. I've just been scared that I'd freak you out if I said it. I love you, too." She sighed, then giggled from behind her tears. "I shouldn't be crying – this is good!"

"It's great. See? You and me are good. We can do this, k?" I replied, feeling a weight lift from my shoulders as I took her frozen hand in mine. "We should go in – you're an ice cube," I teased, as Bella leaned in for one more lingering kiss.

I clasped our fingers together and led the way back to the porch through the freshly fallen snow. As I led her up the stairs and back into the house, my stomach tightened in knots, anxiety washing over me. I had made a big promise to Bella tonight – that we would be ok –and I hoped with every ounce of my being – more than anything I'd ever hoped for in my life – that my words would in fact be true.

**Thank you so much for reading, and for your reviews – I try my best to reply to them all, but last time I missed a few – please know that they are all GREATLY appreciated, and really make my day! My life has been crazy lately but is slowly winding down. I'm sorry this took longer than originally planned - hope to get the next one up in a much speedier fashion! xoxo**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N Great big thanks to my awesome beta, Robzbeanie, and my lovely prereader CShepherd91. You guys are the greatest! **

5:39, 5:40, 5:41….

I watched the minutes ticking by on my bedside clock in anticipation of the alarm going off. It was still pitch-black outside. I willed myself to stay put an extra four minutes, but it was torture. Each minute that went by was one minute closer to my departure, and I fooled myself into thinking that if I stayed put, time would too. Each minute I lay in bed though, was another minute I was wasting in bed and not with Bella. I anxiously shut the alarm off before it had the chance to blare in my face, threw on the clothes I had laid out, and made my way quietly to the kitchen.

Sure enough, as I'd hoped, Bella was already up and was busy hunting through the cupboards. She had her hair pulled back in a messy ponytail, and looked both comfortable and cute in her sweats and fuzzy slippers. Not wanting to startle her, I cleared my throat softly behind her.

"Hey!" she said softly as she spun around. "You're up early."

"Couldn't sleep," I sighed as I made my way to over to her, wrapping her plaid-covered self in my arms.

"Charlie's gonna be up any minute," she warned, as she slid her arms around my waist, "but I snuck you extra cookies for your trip. Don't forget to take the bag in the–"

Before she could say another word, I slid one hand gently around the back of her neck, and with my other hand on her waist I pulled her in tight and close. I kissed her hard, tracing her fuller bottom lip lightly with my tongue. She first tensed then relaxed, returning the kiss, our mouths melting together. I lingered for a moment then broke away, knowing that if I didn't, we'd be caught. Unable to resist I drew her close to me in somewhat of a bear hug, and planted a kiss firmly on top of her head, inhaling the scent of her shampoo – of her.

"I'm sorry – I just won't have the chance to do that once Charlie's up," I murmured in her ear.

"I know," she whispered back at me. "I might head back to my cabin, if that's ok? I want to see you off, but–" she sniffed, those familiar tears sneaking back. "I know I'll be upset, and I don't want Charlie to see and think things, you know?"

"I know," I whispered back, still holding on to her tightly. That lump that had been held down in my throat over the last few days was creeping up again. "It's ok. I love you. I'll call when I get in, ok?"

"Ok. I love you too," she whispered, tears flowing freely now. "Goodbye, Edward."

Unable to actually say it, I gave her a weak wave as she slipped around the corner and out the back door just as Charlie's heavy footsteps could be heard on the stairs.

"Edward! You're early!" he called out in surprise as he headed straight for the full coffee pot. "Where'd Bella go?"

"Oh, um – to take a shower, Sir, I think," I murmured, rubbing my hands up and down my arms. I was frozen, and covered in goosebumps.

"Well, you must be pretty anxious to get going home, eh?"

"I guess so," I sighed, trying my best to put on a happy face, at least for Charlie. He set his cup down, and stared at me from behind a cocked eyebrow.

"Something wrong, Edward?" he asked, pushing up his sleeves, his right hand finding his moustache as it always seemed to when he was deep in thought.

"I just – I like it here. It feels like a home, you know?" I said, swallowing hard, trying my best not to get choked up and beg Charlie to keep me.

"I do know, son. But your parents are waiting for you. Change is never easy, but you'll do well. And heck – nothing's saying you can't ever come back, right?" he replied, finishing with a firm nod of his head. "We need good people around here – you never know what the future will bring."

"That's true. Thank you, Sir. For everything."

"You're welcome, Edward. Emmett should be here any second – let's get your things outside."

Heavy fog had settled around the Ranch, and the sun had yet to make any sign of an appearance. On top of the thin layer of snow, it looked eerie. Emmett's headlights appeared in the driveway moments later, and I was glad – not to be leaving, but for the relief from the cold I'd find inside the warm truck cab. After an exchange of back-pats and final farewells, Charlie headed back for the house, and Emmett and I set out.

I watched the Ranch disappear behind me for as long as I could in the side mirror. Soon, the view turned to nothing but bare tree branches and gravel road.

"Holy snap – it's cold, eh?" Emmett yelped, turning up the heat. "Nearly froze my balls off getting out to the truck this morning," he joked. I gave him a weak chuckle in response.

"Not much in the mood for talking?"

"Not really," I replied softly, hoping that he wouldn't take offense.

"It's cool – how 'bout some tunes?" he asked, turning the dial up on his stereo. The cab filled with the sounds of semi-familiar country songs as we weaved down the long gravel stretches of road towards town. Lyrics about love, and missing people, and heartache filled my ears to the point that I couldn't take it anymore. Emmett didn't appear to notice.

"Dude, you realize you're killing me here, right?" I sighed.

"Oh – shit. Yeah. Sorry. Didn't think," he murmured, popping in one of his more upbeat CDs.

We drove in relative silence for the next few minutes, Emmett singing along with his music, and me staring out the windows. Before I knew it, the bus station came into view, much sooner than it ever previously had.

"Well – here we are," Emmett announced unnecessarily as we pulled into the station. We both hopped down from the truck, and I fetched my things from the back. "I'm proud of you, Eddie," Emmett added while I followed him inside. "You're gonna make a great version of me."

"Sure thing, boss," I snorted, chuckling at his joke. I'd really grown to like and admire Emmett. I wasn't at all ashamed to admit that I wanted to follow in his footsteps.

"Before you go get on that bus, I have something I thought you'd want," Emmett added, then pulled out a folded piece of paper from his pocket. "For you."

I unfolded the slick paper, and sure enough – it was a picture of Bella and me from the night before, hand in hand on the door step, with falling snow all around us. We were smiling, neither of us looking at or aware of the camera.

"Thanks, Em. How did you even–"

"No problem. I printed it out at home last night," he interrupted. "See, someone's always watching. I'm still surprised you two got away with all that you did for so long."

"Yeah, me too, actually. Thanks for not saying anything. We'll deal with it soon."

"I'll hold ya to that, bro. You have a great trip, eh? And keep in touch, alright?"

I nodded, then was wrestled into Emmett's tight grasp. With a heavy slap to the back, and a quick mess-up of my hair, he turned back to his truck, and I boarded my bus.

The rich greens that had covered the hillsides on my way up north had turned to muddy browns, the brilliant bursts of colourful fall leaves long gone. The smell and sounds of the bus hadn't changed, but my outlook sure had. Six weeks ago, I would have thought I'd be excited to go home at this point, but all I felt was dread.

The trip went as fast as a thirteen-hour trip by Greyhound could. Instead of stopping in every tiny town on the way, we only stopped in half of them, which made for a significantly quicker ride. I filled up on greasy food, smelled the same urinal cake smell, and entertained an elderly lady or three with my tales of what I was doing up north. I may have fibbed a little – telling them that I'd been visiting my girlfriend on a ranch near Swan Crossing – but it felt good to say it aloud, even if it was only a partial truth to complete strangers.

I'd fallen asleep on the last leg of the trek back, waking up less than an hour from the bus station in Seattle. Thinking that it'd be wise to shoot a text to my parents with an arrival time, I turned on my phone. A text alert popped right up on my screen. From Mike.

"Esmom said you're on your way. Got a beer at my place with your name on it. Be there, dickface."

Part of me was a little excited to see the guys. My friends weren't all bad – they just weren't the greatest. I didn't think it would be fair or reasonable of me to completely cut them out – I'd just have to be more careful in my choices. I thought that if I popped in – made just a quick appearance – that it would get Mike off my back, and I could fill the guys in a little on my adventure up north. I could use the excuse that I was tired from the trip to slip out early – no harm, no foul.

As we pulled in to the Seattle bus terminal, I could make out Esme's tiny figure jumping up and down clapping on the sidewalk. Carlisle had his hands stuffed in his pockets, and was standing back a little ways, shaking his head at his excited wife. They looked good, and I really was excited to see them.

The moment I stepped off the bus, I was wrapped in one of Esme's famous squeeze hugs – the kind that take your breath away, but make you feel warm.

"Edward! Look at you!" she cried out, pulling back to take me in. "Carlisle – look at these muscles! What happened to you?"

"That's what ranch work will do to a boy, Es," Carlisle chuckled as he reached out for my hand. Instead of just taking it, I leaned into him, giving him a half-back-pat-man-hug – the kind I'd become accustomed to at the Ranch.

"Hey guys. I'm glad to see you," I said, carefully choosing my words. Truthfully, it was really nice to see them, but I would have been lying if I'd said I was glad to be back.

"Let's get you home and fed. Look at that hair, too – that's the longest I've ever seen it, but I like it on you, Edward," Esme went on as we made our way to the car.

"I'm sure you have lots to tell us, but I bet you're tired. We have all weekend, right Esme?" Carlisle said slyly, giving the excited Esme a playful glare.

"Of course. I'm sorry, Edward. I just can't wait to hear about it, is all," she chuckled from the front seat. "What would you like for dinner tonight? Oh, and how about this evening? Do you have any plans?"

"How about tacos?" I replied, stalling a little on my evening plans. "And, I um – I got a text from Mike. He wants me to stop by," I said quietly, and watched as Esme's happy face fell. I should've known that wouldn't be received well.

"Oh. Well, I guess–" she started, disappointment all over her face.

"Do you think that's a good idea?" Carlisle spoke up, glancing back at me in the rear view mirror. He didn't look angry, but rather worried.

"I know what you're thinking, but I promise you, it'll be different," I replied sincerely.

"It's just, you've come a long way, and I'd hate to see things go badly already and–" Esme cut in.

"They won't. I'll only go for a little while."

"Well, if you are confident in that, Edward, then all we can do is let you show us how different things really are," Carlisle interjected.

"Thank you," I replied, grateful for the chance to prove myself. "I won't mess this up."

xoxoxoxox

As soon as we arrived back at the house, I ran my bags upstairs, but was ushered back down by Esme, who quickly got to work on tacos for dinner. I helped chop veggies – which she was completely surprised by, and watched as she eyed me closely in fear of me losing a finger. I hinted at the amount of time I'd spent with Bella at the Ranch as we cooked, and told Esme how she'd guided me in learning to properly prepare some meals.

Knowing that Charlie and Carlisle still kept in touch, I didn't come right out and mention my relationship with Bella, but I had a feeling that Esme got the gist. Her face lit up as I was described our time together. I appreciated how she didn't press for more, but at the same time I really wanted to share it. I planned to talk to Bella about making our big reveal soon. I wanted to share my excitement – it was too good to keep to myself.

After dinner with my parents, I had a quick shower and got dressed for Mike's, hoping to get my visit over with early in the evening. I messed a little with my shaggy, overgrown hair and pulled fresh clothes from my closet. Due to my sub-par packing skills, everything I'd brought back from the Ranch was completely full of wrinkles.

Carlisle had offered to drive me over to Mike's, but knowing Mike – which meant never knowing what to expect – I'd figured it would be best to walk over alone. I headed out with my cell phone in hand, and a promise to my parents to call if I needed anything. I could sense that they were both nervous about me going, but they were giving me the benefit of the doubt, and I appreciated that. In fact, it was probably more freedom than I honestly deserved.

Blocks away from Mike's house, I could hear bass pounding, laughter and hollering filling the night sky. I should have known that Mike's idea of a get together was not small and quiet. I could feel my palms getting sweaty, my heart thumping in anxiety about the situation I would be walking into in mere minutes. I had a lot of people counting on me not to screw up now, and the pressure was big. I picked up my pace, giving myself a pep talk in my head. I could do it. It would be fine.

"Eddwarddd!" a shrill voice called out for me just as I stepped foot on Mike's parents' property. I turned around and there before me was a scantily clad – and very, very drunk – Jessica Stanley. "I've been waiting for your sexy ass to get here!" she hollered as she stumbled along the walkway.

"Hi Jessica," I said coolly, looking over her shoulder at the crowd in the backyard, trying to track down Mike.

"You look amazing, Edward," she hiccupped. "If you want to," she hiccupped again, "you can find me later, in Mike's room," she slurred, as she tugged at her bra strap in an attempt to be sexy, but failed miserably.

"That's not gonna happen, Jess. Where's Mike?" I asked, though I figured it was a lost cause.

"Beer bong," she burped out, weaving a little back and forth on her heels. "By the pool."

"Thanks – maybe you should head home, eh?" I shouted over the music, thinking that sending her out of there was the mature and thoughtful thing to do.

"Ha! You said "eh"!" she snorted. "And don't you tell me what to do – you used to like me. I know you did–" she went on, but I'd already started walking away. I heard her calling out, "Get back here, Edward – I know what you need!" but I couldn't be bothered with her. Watching her display made me feel gross and embarrassed. I disappeared into the crowd before she could spot me again.

I found Mike beside the pool, sure enough, just as he was filling up the beer bong for our buddy Eric. The old me would have joined the crowd gathered around, cheering him on in his antics, but it just seemed so stupid. I watched as Eric sucked back the foamy liquid, his cheeks bulging between gulps, and felt sick. These guys' biggest concern was who could outdrink the other on a Friday night, or which girl they'd brought home, and then how to get rid of her. When I thought of the real troubles my friends up north were dealing with, and about the real, caring relationships they had with one another, I felt disgusted with the circus in front of me. It felt empty, hollow and wrong.

After the last of the beer was drained from the bong, Mike spotted me and hurried over, grabbing a beer from the table on his way.

"Edward! I didn't think you'd show, dude. This one's for you!" he said, popping the top. I took it and sipped a little back. It was good.

"I'm not staying. Just came to say hi."

"What the hell do you mean, "not staying"?" he joked, slapping me hard on the arm. "All this is for you, man – in your honour."

"No, I'm leaving. Long trip, long day."

"At least hit the beer bong? For old time's sake?" Mike pressed. "Don't be a pussy."

"I'm finishing this, then I'm out of here," I said, raising my beer, taking another gulp.

"Listen – I've gotta get over there. There's a new girl, and she's smokin'. Eric's got money on tapping that first – can't let that happen, can we?" he sneered. "I'll find you in a bit, man. You better be here."

"Yeah," I nodded, setting the rest of my beer down on the table. I turned from Mike, pushed through the crowd, and made my way to the sidewalk, heading out on foot for home the same way I came.

As I walked home in the darkness, I thought about my new situation. I realized that I would have to cut ties with the guys here. Seeing their behaviour first hand was the only confirmation I needed. It was hard to believe I'd been such a fool only two months ago, but my time at the Ranch had changed my outlook on my entire life.

Leaving the party, I knew I did the right thing, but it didn't feel completely good either. I was better off – Carlisle, Esme, Bella and Charlie would all be proud of me for not giving in, but I was only reminded at the same time of how I no longer belonged anywhere anymore. Carving out a new place for myself from scratch was going to be seriously hard work.

I noticed the light on in Carlisle's office as I made my way up the porch steps to our home. I slipped quietly inside, hoping not to wake Esme, as she was always one to turn in early.

"That you already, Edward?" Carlisle called quietly from his study.

"Yeah, it's me," I replied, appearing in the doorway.

"You're back early. Something wrong?"

"No – Mike had a huge party. It was a joke. I just couldn't stay there anymore."

"I see," he nodded as he took off his glasses and folded his arms across his chest. "Things sure change, don't they?"

"Yeah. They definitely do," I murmured, yawning widely.

"I'm proud of you, son. Go get some rest. First day back at work tomorrow, so you'll need the sleep."

"Thanks, Carlisle. And thanks for letting me go – I needed to do that," I replied sincerely. "Goodnight."

I climbed the stairs up to my room, stripped down and crashed in my giant bed. It felt weird, but nice to be able to sprawl out and not have my limbs dangling over the edge. I shot Bella a quick text, telling her that I missed her and would call in the morning, and set my alarm for work. I shut my eyes and willed myself to sleep – worry and concern about my first day back at the hospital the next morning weighing heavily on my mind. Trying a new tactic, I directed my thoughts back to my favourite moments at the Ranch, and after revisiting some of the most special times, I quickly drifted to sleep.

**Thank you so much for reading and for your reviews. I love to hear your thoughts! I'm heading out on holidays for a couple of weeks, but the wait won't be long – I'll be back mid-Julyish with the next chapter. XOXO**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N Major thanks to Robzbeanie and CShepherd91 for all of their help!**

The next morning I awoke to something strange and unfamiliar – the buzz and beeps of morning rush hour traffic. It was an unwelcome change from the sounds of birds and cattle I'd gotten so used to up north. I was up before my alarm yet again, and still had plenty of time before I had to head out to the hospital for work.

Immediately my thoughts turned to Bella and what she was up to. I had shot her a quick text letting her know that I'd made it, but I was aching to talk to her – to see how she was doing and make sure things were still ok. I also needed to come clean about the party. I wanted to share my revelations with Bella. I wanted her to trust me, and to see that I could be honest with her, and the only way to do that was by giving her the details. I had nothing to hide, though I feared that Bella may view my attending the party at all as a relapse. Break it to her gently?

Not only did I need to hear Bella's voice, but I also needed to check in on everyone else. I was worried about my friends, and I wasn't naïve enough to believe that in a place like the Ranch, things couldn't change in a matter of minutes. I wondered how long this would go on. How long would I feel like I needed to touch base? Everyone at the Ranch was doing their thing long before I had ever arrived, and it would have been stupid of me to think it would all cease once I left. I knew that rebuilding my life in Seattle would require me to focus, and unfortunately I didn't yet have an answer for how I'd keep my thoughts in the present and off of what I had to regretfully call my past.

With the one-hour time difference, I realized that it wouldn't be too early to call, and quickly dialed Bella's number from my phone. After the fifth ring, I'd almost given up, when a groggy voice picked up the other line.

"Edward?" Bella croaked out. I could barely understand her. "How are you?"

"I'm ok, but are you?" I asked, instantly worried. The sound of her raw voice made my own throat hurt. "You sound horrible!"

"I'm so sick. You're lucky you left when you did. We've all got the flu," she choked out, between coughs.

"Holy crap. Everyone's got it? I wish I was there – I could help you," I sighed, as I slammed my head back against my pillow.

"Not really everyone – me, Emmett, Sam and Dad. I miss you. Wish you were here, too," she murmured.

"Soon, right? So, I kinda have some news," I began, preparing myself to tell her about the party. "I went over to Mike's last night. He had a party."

I was met with silence.

"It was such a joke, Bella. I didn't even stay. I went to say hi – I needed to do it."

Still nothing.

"Bella? You still there? I had one beer, did a quick lap and went home. I'm so over them – I just needed to see it with my own eyes. Please understand."

Bella clearing her throat over the line alerted me to the fact that she was in fact still there, but it wasn't the reassurance I'd been hoping for.

"Well–" she sighed, "I knew this would happen."

"It wasn't like that. I promise you–" I started pleading, desperate for her to not be upset with me.

"Hold on, Edward. Let me finish," she croaked again. I could hear her faintly taking a drink over the line. "I knew it would happen – that you'd meet up with them. I mean, who wouldn't. They were your friends."

"But they're idiots. Immature, spoiled–" I continued.

"I'm proud of you."

This time it was me who went silent.

"You did the right thing. Many wouldn't have, but I knew you would," she whispered.

"Gah – thank you!" I exhaled. "I was really worried that you'd be mad. I kind of deserve the judgment, ya know?"

"No, you don't," she sighed. I could tell she was tired. "You're doing good, Edward. Really good. I knew you would."

"Thank you, but enough about me. You need to sleep. Get Quil to make you some tea – that kid owes you a few favours!" I joked, trying to keep things light, but all the while reeling inside that I couldn't be the one there to help her.

"I know, eh?" she giggled, but the giggles turned to coughs. "The guys have been good at picking up the slack and Rose is making soup as we speak. I should go though, I don't want to, but I can barely talk."

"For sure. One thing quick though–"

"What's that?"

"Can we tell our parents now? I think I'm ready."

I was met again with silence.

"I don't know if it's the best time," Bella finally said hesitantly. "I want to tell Charlie, too, but he's sick now, and things are pretty stressful with the guys. What's another week, right?"

"Ok. I can wait, I'm just excited," I said, trying to hide my disappointment. "Talk about it more later? I've gotta get ready for work. I'll call you tomorrow, k?"

"Ok. I love you," Bella sighed, sleep clearly taking over.

"Love you too. Get some rest!"

"I will. Bye!" she said, hanging up just as my alarm started blaring. I reached over without looking and slammed my hand down on it roughly. I took out my frustrations on my eye sockets, digging my palms firmly into them in hopes that I could just shut my mind off and make it through the day.

I had hoped that my phone call to Bella would make both of us feel better, and in some ways it did. She was proud of me – and that felt good – but now I wasn't just missing her. I was missing her and I was worried. With a doctor uncle for an acting father, I knew a flu was just a flu, but being so far away made everything seem so much worse. With Sam, Charlie and Emmett all sick, too, chores wouldn't be getting done as they needed to, and that would just add to the giant pile of stress that the Ranch housed on a good day.

I was disappointed that Bella didn't want to come clean about us yet, but I understood her reasoning. I swore to myself that I'd talk to her about it some more on our next phone call, and nail down a time that would work for us both. I would respect her wishes as long as she needed me to, but it was weighing me down. During my few weeks at the Ranch, I'd become so used to putting all of my feelings – feelings that I'd pushed down so hard for years – on the table, that it was hard to shut the flood gates now that they were opened. I had good news to share, and I wanted desperately to share it.

"Edward?" I heard Esme call out from the hallway, snapping me out of my head. "I've got your scrubs here – they're all clean!"

"Thank you – I'll be right out," I called out, and wearily dragged myself out of bed. I put on my happy face, and headed for the washroom to get geared up for my first day back on the job.

I arrived early at the doctors' entrance with Carlisle. He rarely drove me to work before I left for the Ranch, as I was rarely on time. I think I'd surprised him when I was sitting in his passenger seat waiting for him, since it had always been the other way around.

I made my way to the janitor room down the long, sterile hospital hallway. Everything looked basically the same as I remembered – a small table and chairs, some cubbies, a coffee pot and microwave on one side, and boxes upon boxes of cleaning supplies stacked high on shelves on the other.

I found my clipboard with my name on it, and checked to see what duties I'd been assigned for the day. Instead of my regular list, I found a note full of flowers and smiley doodles from my boss, Ms. Mallory.

"Dear Edward – missed your face around here. I'm gone this week to take my kids to the ex's place, but I've got a list for you. Don't work too hard –Angela will pick up the slack," I read quietly to myself aloud.

Angela was a girl who was hired just after I was. I knew her vaguely from school, but we didn't hang out with the same people. She was always nose deep in a book, volunteering for stuff – what I guess you'd call a nerd. She couldn't stand me – she told me I was lazy once, and that I only kept the job because of my connection to Carlisle. Looking back, she was right. I was lazy and useless. I probably did only keep the job I had because of Carlisle. Ms. Mallory was hard on her – and outrageously easy on me – and it wasn't fair. I owed her an apology.

My cleaning list that was attached to my clipboard was absolutely ridiculous. Wipe down the mirrors, wash all surfaces in waiting room, take out garbage. That was it.

All of this was stuff I could do in no time, and I knew there was much more that needed doing. Thinking back though, the list summed up about all I did before I had left. I'd piss around – flirt with the cafeteria girls while I pushed a mop and broom back and forth – but I never really accomplished much. Angela picked up almost all of my slack, and she would be the one to catch the grief when our jobs weren't completed.

I vowed that it would all change, starting that day. I completed my to-do list in my first hour, and started in on Angela's. Our shifts overlapped by a few hours, and I had over half of hers done by the time she showed up at ten. I made it back to our supply room just in time for her arrival.

"Hey, Angela?"

"Yeah?" she barked at me without looking while she unpacked her bag into her cubby.

"I um, I finished almost all of your list," I murmured, feeling the tension roll off of her. We didn't ever talk unless we had to, so she was probably wondering what the hell I wanted.

"Why? You get paid double for it or something?" she snapped.

"What? No. I just – I owe it to you. I've been a dick around here, and I'm trying to change things."

"Well–" she sighed as she looked over the marks on her checklist. "This is helpful. I have a ton of homework, and I was gonna be here late getting all this done."

"Good. Glad I could help. I've still got three hours left – I'll help you with the rest."

"You aren't shitting me?" she asked while giving me the side-eye.

"No. I'm not all bad, ok? Let's get this done."

The rest of my day was spent following Angela's lead while she gawked at me in disbelief as we completed our jobs. Compared to the labour I'd been doing at the Ranch, it was easy, but I put extra elbow grease into everything I did. It was almost as if my body was craving the challenge. Angela and I didn't talk much, but by the end of my shift, the atmosphere between us was much more pleasant.

"How was the first day back?" Carlisle asked me as I jumped into the passenger side of the car with him. He was working a short shift, which luckily for me meant I didn't have to catch the bus. I'd spent more than enough time on a bus in the last while.

"It wasn't bad. Ms. Mallory wasn't there – just had a checklist to do," I replied.

"I saw you helping out Angela while I was on my rounds– she's a nice girl. She works over at the senior center, too. Her mom had a whole slew of health problems last year, and as the oldest of five, she has to do her part to help out, so she takes on the extra hours and odd jobs," Carlisle trailed off as he drove out of the parking structure.

I instantly felt like a piece of shit for not knowing that. I'd worked with her for months and had no idea that she was struggling that way.

"I'm such an asshole," I groaned.

"No, Edward," Carlisle chuckled."You did some asshole things. If you were really an asshole, you wouldn't recognize that. And now you do." It was funny to hear Carlisle say "asshole." He was always so proper and perfect , but I figured I'd roll with it.

"Were you ever an asshole?" I smirked.

"Are you kidding me?" he snorted. "You do remember that I wound up in the very spot you just found yourself in, right?"

"Well, yeah, but I don't know why."

"It's kind of a long story. Calls for a detour," Carlisle said as he quickly exited off the road we were travelling on. He pulled the car into a parking area just off the main road, overlooking the Puget Sound. I followed in silence as he made his way to the hood, and picked up a handful of loose rocks from the ground.

"I don't really know the best way to bring this all up, but I guess I'll start with my dad. My father was a really mean person, Edward. He was what you would call an actual asshole. He was an alcoholic, and the meanest drunk you'd ever meet. And from him, I learned that being an asshole was what was acceptable. So I partied with my friends, got in lots of fights, quit school."

I leaned back against the hood of Carlisle's car and took in what he was saying. He just didn't seem like the type – looking at him you would never suspect he had a shady past.

"I knew it was wrong, but I did it anyway. I was so angry – at him, at myself, at life – and I tried to take that anger out somehow, but it was never enough," he continued, tossing some pebbles from his hand into the water.

"That really sucks," I said, unable to find better words. "How did you end up at the Ranch?" I asked, trying hard to show Carlisle that I was deeply interested. Carlisle had never opened up to me this way, and I wanted to learn more.

"My mother had been secretly setting some money aside for me. She made me a deal one night, after my father went on a week-long drinking binge, and said that she could guarantee me a better life if I'd just go to this place that she'd found out about through our pastor. She said that she would tell my father that I ran away. She also said she'd only pay for it if I promised that I'd go and I'd try."

"That's all it took?"

"Well, I might have been an asshole, but I was a smart asshole. So I went."

"Wow. I had no idea," I replied in disbelief.

"There's a lot that you don't know, Edward. I mean that in more ways than one. But you're willing to learn, and that's what you've got going for you. You're gonna go far," he said, giving me a heavy pat on the shoulder.

"Thanks – it means a lot coming from you," I replied sincerely. "Can I ask what happened to them?"

"Who?"

"Your parents?"

"Oh! Of course – you can ask me anything, son. I mean that. They both have passed now – my mother ended up leaving my father, but it wasn't until years later, after he was finally arrested for domestic assault. I never actually saw my father again. See, my dad was somebody that would never change. We are different, Edward," he trailed off.

"Yeah," I replied quietly, still a bit numb from Carlisle's revelations. "We are."

Once we got back in the car, our conversation shifted to lighter topics. We talked about baseball, about the work that I wanted to do with youth once I was able, and about what we hoped Esme both was and wasn't making for dinner.

When we arrived home, Carlisle and Esme slipped into the den together – they always had a few minutes that they'd spend alone when they got home from work. Today I noticed, as I ran quickly past on my way upstairs, that they were just standing together, embracing. I always had admired their relationship – they were a united front that you couldn't crack no matter how hard you tried. And boy, did I try. I would tell one that the other gave me permission for something, just to see how far I could push them. Now, with a relationship of my own, it was good to know that I had a healthy, balanced partnership right in my own home that I could learn from.

I stripped out of my scrubs and grabbed a pair of sweats and a t-shirt to change into. I picked up my phone and quickly scrolled through my messages. One was from Mike, wanting me to join him and some guys for a round of pool. I quickly deleted it. Another was from Jasper – a photo was attached of the main house at the Ranch, completely covered in snow. That one, I saved.

Lastly, I had an email from Bella.

"I slept for a few hours after talking to you, and I'm feeling a little better. Hope that you aren't upset about not telling our parents just yet. I really want to, Edward, but shit is hitting the fan here. Seth got busted with pot this afternoon, and Quil's run away. Charlie's still super sick – hasn't even left his room. Me and Emmett and Rose are pulling things together – they've got Harry Clearwater out looking for Quil as we speak. I've got a lead that he's on his way to see Jake in the city – Jake said he'll let us know if he shows up, and I'll make sure I keep you posted. I wanted to call and tell you, but with all the drama here, I wasn't sure there would be time and I wanted you to know. I love you, and I miss you and I'll talk to you soon. Keep doing what you're doing – you're amazing."

xo Bella

**So glad to finally get this out! I've been away on holidays – which were wonderful – and it's good to be back. Chapters will be coming more regularly again now that I'm home. I love to hear your thoughts – thank you for reading and reviewing! **


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N Big thanks, as always, to my awesome beta Robzbeanie and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91. **

Immediately, without thinking, I called Bella. I knew that it was unlikely that I'd reach her, but I needed to. At first I couldn't believe that Quil would run, but the more I thought about it, the more naïve that seemed. After several rings, Bella's voice came on the line, but it was only her voicemail.

"Bella – it's me. I know you're busy but I'm worried. Please call me back when you can. Let me do something – anything – make phone calls? I don't know. Just call me," I choked out.

I contemplated my next actions. I wanted nothing more than to run back there, but I knew it wouldn't solve anything, and that sucked. Sucked so bad, that for the first time in my adult life I wanted to lock myself in the bathroom and cry. That burning in my gut – the yearning deep inside me – that had been calling me back was screaming at me louder now more than ever, and I had no idea how to make it stop.

Later that night, in an attempt to distract myself, I did a few loads of laundry – much to Esme's amazement – and played some card games with Carlisle that I had learned while at the Ranch. It didn't work wonders, but it kept my mind occupied for at least a few hours. Long after Esme and Carlisle went to bed, I dusted my shelves, organized my books – basically anything mundane I could think of to avoid sleep that I knew wouldn't come.

The next morning – way too bright and early – I headed back to work with Carlisle, still without another word from Bella.

Much like the previous day, I plowed through my list early and started in on Angela's. We were drafted by the laundry ladies at lunch time to fold the extra sheets and towels in the spare room in the basement. It was cool, damp and seriously quiet, which I thought might have been awkward with Angela, but she surprised me by striking up conversation first.

"So where exactly did you go?" she asked as she pulled the first of many pillowcases off the top of the large stack. I was wondering when my disappearance would come up.

"Jail," I replied, nonchalantly.

"Pfft – no you didn't. You'd get eaten alive in jail. Where'd you really go? Or is it some kind of secret?"

"No, it's no secret. I went to a ranch in Canada. They send all kind of delinquents there. To smarten them up, I guess."

"Really? Canada, eh?" she laughed. "And did it work?"

"I'm here right now helping you, aren't I?" I snarked. "But yeah, I think it did work. Seeing some of the other guys there – guys with really serious problems – helped me see how stupid I was being."

"Maybe that's what my oldest brother needs," she replied softly. "He's a good kid, but man. Ever since my mom's been sick, he's been acting out. He's failing almost all his classes, and I know he's been drinking. He's only fifteen!"

A light bulb suddenly went off in my head. I owed Angela for all the grief I'd given her in the past, and here was a chance to make it up to her.

"What if I said I could help?" I offered.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I had to set goals and stuff while I was at the Ranch, and one of them was that I wanted to work with kids who were having trouble when I got home."

"Then what are you doing here?"

"I wanted to volunteer at the school, but after the rep I had going with the principal, he wanted me to show that I was a "healthy, active member of the community" before he'd let me in the volunteer program."

"That sucks, but I guess I can see where he's coming from."

"I can too. But maybe – if you're cool with it – I could spend some time with your brother? Wouldn't be anything big. Maybe just bowling or something?" I suggested nervously. I watched as Angela's eyebrows furrowed, her hands dropping the towel she held as she focused.

"You know what? I think that'd actually be good for him. He doesn't really have any older guys in his life. I'll talk to him and my mom, k?"

"Sounds good. Looking forward it!"

After we worked through the giant pile of laundry, Angela and I exchanged numbers in hopes of getting her brother on board to hang out. I learned quite a bit about Angela that afternoon – that she had a long-term boyfriend, loved anything to do with vampires, and was saving up to go to nursing school. In some ways, she reminded me of Bella – she had faced a lot of adversity, but was working hard to get what she wanted and where she wanted to be. I hoped that one day soon, we could work it out so they'd be able to meet.

Back at my cubby, I grabbed my wallet and phone, and noticed that I had a missed text alert from Bella.

"Sorry I haven't called. Quil was found at Jake's. Emmett's on his way to haul him back here. I'll try and call tonight, but no guarantees. Love you. Xo," was all it said.

I was relieved that Quil had been found, but it wasn't enough. I hurried home in hopes of hearing from her later that night, but again was met with nothing.

The rest of the week went by about the same. Quick text updates back and forth, but nothing substantial. Not being able to speak to Bella was starting to eat me alive. I was aware that the stress she and the others had been under was monumental, but I still had so many questions about what was really going on up there. I was trying my best to be patient – I knew I had to realize that this was Bella's life, but I was admittedly selfish. I needed her. I knew she would want me to carry on down here – doing what I needed to do – so I kept doing just that.

Saturday afternoon rolled around, and it was time to work on righting some wrongs. I made arrangements with Angela to take her brother out to the driving range, after her mom gave the a-ok. It was the end of the season, so the rates were good, and whacking around a few balls for the afternoon was always a favourite way of mine to release tension. It wasn't hard to get Ben, Angela's brother, to agree to come along, much to my surprise.

When Ben first showed up he was incredibly quiet. Angela introduced us, and I tried to start off friendly, but Ben just stared at me with his hands in his pockets. He looked pissed off – not at me, necessarily, but at life in general. I'd been there – I'd been pissed off at life, too.

Angela said her goodbyes, shot me a look as if to say "good luck," and hopped back in her car. I didn't waste any more time, and set us each up with a club and a bucket of balls. There was only one other person lined up taking shots, which was nice – gave us some privacy.

"So, Ben? How old are you again?" I asked, trying to get conversation going as I lined up my shot.

"Fifteen," he replied as he swung at his ball recklessly, as if it were a hockey puck.

"You know, if you hold your club like this," I coached, exaggerating my hand placement to show him the correct technique, "you'll be a lot more accurate."

"I don't care," he said as he wound up for another two-handed shot. We worked through our buckets fairly quickly, the awkwardness thick in the air around us.

"I'm done," Ben announced, once he'd batted at his final ball, then tossed his club aside.

"Well, ok then. Pick that up, and we can get out of here." So far, our visit hadn't been even slightly successful, so I opted for what had often worked for my parents when they wanted to talk to me – food. "Wanna go get a Coke and some fries?"

"How 'bout a beer?"

"How 'bout not," I groaned.

"Fine. I'm hungry," he replied, rolling his eyes at me. Ben followed quietly behind as I ordered us each a pop and some fries from the canteen window, then found us a table in the back corner of the clubhouse.

"So are you "The Edward"?" Ben asked.

"I could be?" I said slowly.

"I've heard all about you. My friends are gonna be jealous, dude. I would've told Ang to kiss it today, but when she said it was you – that changed everything. Is it true that you stole the bucket of chicken off the KFC sign? Oh, and hey – maybe you could get me a fake ID!" he opened up. This wasn't good.

"First – don't say stuff like that to your sister," I cautioned, not liking where this conversation was heading.

"And second, the guy you heard about and the guy that's here right now are two very different people, ok? I was an idiot and I'm still paying for it."

"But you're like a legend."

"Popular, maybe. But I was stupid, too. Enough about me, though. What's got you so mad at Ang, anyway?" I asked, giving myself a pat on the back for redirecting the conversation, just as our fries showed up.

"Everything. She acts like she's my mom and she's not."

"You know she cares about you though, right?"

"I guess so."

"See, I screwed up a lot of stuff, but I was pretty lucky. My family cared about me and stopped me before it was too late. I think that's all Angela's trying to do for you."

"Is that what this is all about?" he spat, the screech of his chair shooting backwards echoed through the empty room. "She made you come here and preach to me?"

"No, not at all, but I do know that she's worried. You might not realise it now, but what you're doing with school and your friends? It'll catch up to you. It did to me."

"Whatever," he huffed, slamming back half of his pop.

"And you know what?" I asked quickly, thinking on my feet. I knew I had to lighten things up, or Ben would shut down on me completely.

"What?" he rolled his eyes yet again at me, as he stabbed his fry in some ketchup.

"The really hot girls? Like, the smokin' hot ones?" I said, with a smile. "They go after guys who're successful. Accomplish stuff. Not the bad guy – that's just a trick."

"Shut up," he chuckled, blowing me off, but was obviously less tense.

"I'm not kidding!" I exclaimed, watching as Ben tried to hide his grin.

After that, I let the heavy stuff go. We talked about sports, camping, Canada – all easy, relaxed topics. I was tempted to reach across the table, grab Ben by the shoulders and shake him until he listened to me about the stuff I told him earlier, but I knew in reality it wouldn't help. He was getting more comfortable with me, and if I wanted to be a positive influence on him, I needed that.

"So, do you think you'd want to do this again sometime?" I asked once we were finished with a second refill of Coke, hoping that I didn't strike out.

"I guess so," he replied indifferently, but I could tell that he was just trying to play it cool.

"Good. I'll be in touch with Angela, alright? You take it easy, Ben," I said as I picked up our bill and headed for home.

I could smell Esme's cooking down the driveway as I arrived at home, and from what I was gathering, she wasn't trying any of her crazy new concoctions. I was excited to be home – to share my day with her and Carlisle, and hopefully track down Bella.

"Where ya been, Edward?" Esme called from the kitchen just as I shut the heavy front door.

"At the driving range – do you know Angela?" I called back from around the corner. "The girl I work with from the hospital?"

"Yes! Isn't she lovely? Wait–" she paused, "were you on a date? Oh, Edward! She's such a nice girl–"

"No, no!" I cut her off, feeling my cheeks get hot. "She's got a boyfriend, and I wasn't with her – I was with her brother Ben."

"Really? That's great. I've heard he's been having a rough time. This is almost ready – why don't you go get Carlisle, and tell us about it over dinner, k? He was just on the phone upstairs!" she hollered over the crashing of pots and pans.

"Sure thing!" I called back and headed for Carlisle's office.

Down the hall from Carlisle's office, I could make out his voice, so he was indeed still on the phone. Not wanting to interrupt, I paused in the doorway.

"Ok, Emmett. I will. Yes. No, thank you for calling. I'll make sure," he said softly as he hung up the receiver. He looked off – something wasn't right.

"Hey – what's up?" I asked, alerting him to my presence.

"That was Emmett," Carlisle said softly as he tossed off his glasses and scrubbed his face with his hands. "I've got some bad news, Edward. Charlie's had a heart attack."

**Thank you for reading and for your reviews – I have been fail at replying, but I'm vowing to work on it this time (and figure out this new system, already!). I hate to leave it here...all I can say is that I won't leave ya hangin' long! xoxo**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N Major thanks to my wonderful beta Robzbeanie, and my awesome prereader CShepherd91. You guys are the best! Xoxo**

"A heart attack?" I yelped, a wave of disbelief and anxiety washing over me. "Oh my God – is he?" I stalled, barely able to form the words I wanted to say.

"He's doing ok. The ambulance made it in time."

"But he–" I huffed, flopping down into a leather chair across from Carlisle. "What about–" Nothing I wanted to ask was coming out right.

"Emmett said they'll be keeping him in the hospital for quite a while. This happened before – right after Isabella went away to school, actually. He's lucky this time."

Bella. Suddenly, it hit me. I knew it now – there was no talking myself out of it this time. I looked Carlisle dead in the eyes and said, "I have to go back."

"Now, Edward? Do you really think that's the best idea? You're just getting settled in here, I mean–"

"No. I have to. They need me."

"They have plenty of staff, Edward."

"No. Bella does. I need to be with her," I pleaded, needing this not to be a fight. For him to just understand me. If this was how I revealed us, then so be it.

"Is there something I'm missing here, son?" he questioned, looking me over curiously. "Because if there is, you should probably come out with it now."

"Me and Bella. We're together." Just like that, it was out.

"Huh," he huffed, several long, silent, awkward seconds later. "Please tell me that your "enjoyment" of the Ranch wasn't based on this alone."

"Of course not!" I yelled, irritated that he'd even think that of me.

"Ok – I'm sorry, relax. How serious is this?"

"Serious. I swear to god, Carlisle, it's for real. I've never met anyone like her – she's amazing, and she helped me, and I – I've gotta help her, and everyone else, too."

"Does Charlie know about this?" he questioned, his expression stern.

"Not yet. We were gonna tell you all soon." Carlisle stared at his folded hands on the desk and started thinking again, these silent moments between us making me want to scream.

"Well," he sighed, "I was going to go anyway. Charlie's been a lifelong friend, I'm familiar enough with the Ranch, and Emmett had asked as a favour. But Edward – you make proper arrangements with work, you go up there to work – not fool around – and you explain this relationship to Charlie once he's recuperated, you understand?"

"I do. Thank you, Carlisle," I exhaled in one relieved breath.

"Ok. Go pack. I'll book us both a plane ticket."

I practically sprinted back to my room, flinging the door wide open behind me. Immediately, I dialed Bella.

"Hi, you've reached Bella–"

"Shit, shit, shit!" I cursed aloud, beyond irritated that I couldn't get a hold of her. I knew now, more than ever, she'd need me. The wall she was putting between us – intentional or not – was making me insane.

"Bella – please answer your phone. I've been calling for days, and I'm worried – and with Charlie now – damn it, Bella," I sighed, not angry, just frustrated. "Please just call me!"

I tossed my phone aside on my bed and dug my empty suitcase out from the bottom of my closet. I frantically started packing, flinging clothes from my closet and drawers into a heap on my bed. I remembered that it would be getting a lot colder up north now, and packed some long johns and a few extra pairs of socks.

Just as I was loading up the last of my toiletries, I heard a soft knock on the door. Esme poked her head around the corner.

"Hey, you. You've sure got a lot more energy packing this time around!" she said, her soft smile giving away that she already knew something was up. Esme was known for her inability to keep happy news a secret – at Christmas time after she'd finish her shopping, she'd be bursting at the seams with excitement, wanting everyone to know what they got. She had that same excited look on her face, but I could tell she was gently trying to feel me out.

"You talked to Carlisle?" I asked, assuming she was brought up to speed.

"I did," she said, as she slipped past my packing mess and moved to the edge of my bed.

"It sucks about Charlie, eh?" I sat down next to her, knowing she wanted to talk.

"It does. And I have to say – I'm pretty surprised about your news," she added, giving me a light elbow to the side.

"You are?"

"Yeah, I am. But I can relate," she replied hesitantly, almost as if she was searching for the right words, as she picked at a loose thread on my bedspread.

"Relate?"

"Well, yeah. We were in your shoes before, me and Carlisle. He was still living at the Ranch when I met him." Esme was talking slowly, softly. I could feel her reluctance to reveal more, and I knew why. In the past I had yelled when she tried to talk to me this way – about family, about the past. The thought of doing that now made my stomach queasy.

"I didn't know that."

"The reason I'm telling you – I just, I guess I want you to know that it is possible. That when it's real love, distance doesn't really matter. That's all." She shrugged.

"Thank you. Seriously." I shuffled closer to her, wrapped an arm around her shoulders tightly and squeezed. I didn't know what else to say, but that felt right.

"You're welcome. I can tell you're worried, but things will be ok, ok?"

The shrill ring of my phone behind us startled us both. I reached for it quickly and checked the caller ID – it was Bella.

"This is her – I've gotta take it," I said, anxious.

"Of course." Esme gave me a quick peck on the cheek and slipped out, shutting the door quietly behind her.

"Edward?" Bella sounded shaky, her voice small.

"Thank God it's you – I've been going crazy here!"

"I'm sorry," she choked, then broke into a full out sob.

"No – no, no, no. Don't be sorry – I've just been worried sick." God, I felt stupid. Here I was making her feel guilty when she was the one going through so much.

"I was afraid to call you," she finally got out, gasping between words.

"Why?"

"Because you're doing so good, and things have gone to shit up here, and I didn't want you to worry about me."

"Shh – hey. We're in this together, ok?" I soothed, needing her to know that I wasn't angry – just concerned. "How's Charlie doing?"

"Not horrible, but not great. It was scary."

"I bet. I wish I was there for you, but I've got good news."

"Hmm?" she sniffed as she blew her nose.

"I'm coming back – for a little while, anyway. With Carlisle."

There was a pause on her end. "Are you serious?"

"Yep. We're heading to the airport tonight – hope to get on standby."

"I'm so glad. I was just scared to tell you stuff. I didn't want you to come running back here and jeopardize everything," she sighed. "I thought this would all just pass, I mean – hard times come in phases here – but then this happened, and I just can't do it alone right now."

"I know you were looking out for me, but please – don't leave me in the dark again. It's worse."

"I know. I won't. I've gotta go here again – Seth's social worker is coming over. I love you."

"I love you too. See you soon?" I chuckled a little in disbelief that it really would be soon.

"I can't wait – have a safe trip."

We waited at the airport for hours. Esme had packed us a ton of snacks, but even mindless eating couldn't pass the time quickly enough. We finally got on the plane just after midnight. While I was waiting, I sent a text to Angela asking for Ben's email address and filled her in on what was happening. Even though I'd phoned the hospital, I didn't want to leave her hanging. We'd gotten considerably closer, and it wouldn't have been fair otherwise.

The airplane was packed, but Carlisle and I managed to get seats together. Carlisle had already set himself up with a neck pillow and was reclining back in his seat with his eyes closed. Me – I couldn't even pretend to sleep.

"How come you made me take the bus?" I asked randomly, once we'd reached our cruising altitude.

"All part of that character-building plan," Carlisle smirked, opening one eye and giving me a quick glance.

"Yeah, right."

"We still have to drive – about 2 hours. I'm renting a truck." He stretched his arms in front of him, settling deeper in his seat.

"Why not a car?"

"Dangerous roads. We'll want the four-wheel drive." This time he didn't even open an eye.

"Oh. Esme told me you guys met while you were still at the Ranch," I continued, bouncing my knees. I was too anxious to sit in silence.

"Yes, we did."

"Does Charlie know that?"

"Yes, he does."

"I'm afraid to tell him," I admitted, needing to get it off my chest.

"I bet."

"You aren't helping me here," I groaned. Carlisle opened his eyes again, took a drink from his bottle of water, and turned towards me in his seat.

"You dug yourself this hole, and you need to find your way out of it. Charlie's strict, but a reasonable guy. He'll likely be upset that this was happening behind his back, but I know he likes you. Better?"

"A little," I mumbled.

"Good. Get some sleep."

When the plane touched down, the dead winter scenery was unlike anything I'd seen before. It was hard to believe that I'd only been gone for such a short while. All of the leaves were gone, and every surface had a thin covering of frost that sparkled in the sun. The cool northern breeze that was present for the length of my stay was back, but now it was stronger. Carlisle had to crank the heat in the truck to keep the windows from frosting up.

I managed to get a few hours of sleep, but Carlisle woke me as we were entering the Swan Crossing town limits. We pulled in to the Ranch just as the sun was rising high in the sky, the orange and pink light shining off the windows.

We didn't even have the truck in park before Bella came bursting through the front door of the main house. She had on a thick plaid coat and jeans, and her hair was up in a messy ponytail. I could see from a distance that she had puffy dark circles under her eyes. She gave me a little wave – her face lighting up, but she looked hesitant to approach me. In the chaos of the recent circumstances, I hadn't had the chance to tell her that Carlisle and Esme knew about us, so I understood her nervousness.

"My goodness, Bella – last I saw you, you were about this big!" Carlisle called out to her and motioned towards his hip. "You hangin' in there ok?"

"I think so. I think I'm gonna head to the hospital to see Dad this afternoon. Can I get you guys anything for breakfast?" she asked, tucking her hands tightly in her back pockets. I wanted desperately to replace them with my own.

"No, dear. You don't worry about us at all – Edward and I are here to help. For now, I just need to hit the shower, grab something quick to eat, and then I'll get you to introduce me to the boys, ok?"

"Ok. I'll stick around the main house."

"I'll leave you kids be. Edward – business as usual around here, got it?"

"Yes, Sir!" I responded with an over-enthusiastic salute. It was funny for me to see – Carlisle really had his game face on. His posture was different, his voice held more authority – he was filling Charlie's shoes so far with ease.

The moment the heavy front door shut behind Carlisle, Bella leaped towards me with a squeal and wrapped her arms around me.

"I can't believe you're really here. It feels like you've been gone forever. It's crazy, but it does," she breathed into my neck.

"I know. I missed you." As I squeezed her tight, nervousness about how now – now that I was back at the Ranch, back with her – I could ever possibly leave again, started creeping up inside of me. I pushed the thought aside as quickly as it came. I was there to focus on Bella, and if my mind was worried about the future, it wouldn't be fair to her.

"What's the plan for today?" I asked, bringing myself back to the present.

"Well, the chickens need feed. Same with the cattle. I was hoping you'd come with me this afternoon. You and Carlisle, maybe? Charlie doesn't know you came yet."

"Sounds good. Oh yeah, just so you know – Carlisle knows."

"Knows what?"

"About us."

"Oh, shit." She leaned back from me, worry and shock in her eyes.

"It's ok – I had to tell him. It was the only way I could convince him I needed to come back."

"He's not mad?" she asked incredulously.

"No. But he wants me to tell Charlie everything when he's feeling better."

"Ok," she nodded. "We need to do it anyway."

"We do. I don't want to keep you a secret anymore." I quickly wrapped her tighter in my grasp, and spun her around in a half circle.

Bella giggled, and just as I set her down she kissed me – equally urgent and tender. I returned the kiss, pulling her hips in closer to mine. I wanted nothing more than to make her feel good, take her mind off the stress and just love her in every way I knew how. I willed my hand that was creeping along the top of her ass to stay put – as much as I wanted her, now wasn't the time for groping. I would follow her lead in all of this – she had me.

"Hospital this afternoon, my place tonight?" she grinned up at me, leaving a tiny kiss on my chin before she broke away.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world."

**Thank you so much for your reading, and for your reviews. The next chapter should be up in a week or two! xoxo**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N Thank you to my awesome beta and prereader – Robzbeanie and CShepherd91. You guys are wonderful! xoxo**

Back inside the main house, I was immediately greeted with familiarity – the smell of something cinnamon baking, the warmth. Everything looked the exact same way as it did when I left, and for that I was grateful. The only real change was my room – since Seth had moved into the green room, I was stuck on the pull-out couch in the den. I hoped to spend more time at Bella's, if we could get away with it – the single bed in my room at the Ranch was one memory I was happy to leave behind.

I unpacked my things quickly and rushed to meet up with Carlisle, Bella and the guys. They would just be coming in from their first round of morning chores, and I was really excited to surprise them.

In the kitchen, Bella was pulling the last pan of fresh cinnamon buns from the oven. She'd told me before that cooking was therapeutic for her, and judging by the plastic bags filled with muffins and cookies on the counters, I could see that she'd been taking part in a lot of recent therapy. She had some work to do with the horses, so she left me alone to wait for the others, on strict orders that I wasn't to touch anything until they all got in. I wanted to follow her – to make out in the barn like we had not all that long ago – but I resisted. I was excited to see my friends.

The sound of Jasper whistling from the front foyer gave me a heads up that the guys were back. I waited quietly in my chair for them to acknowledge me.

"Get the hell outta town!" Jasper bellowed as he rounded the corner. The others hustled in behind him and headed straight for Bella's baked goods. "What the heck are you doing back so soon?" he asked as he gave me one of his famous "man-hugs."

"I came with Carlisle – he's gonna be filling in for Charlie for awhile," I replied, helping myself to a muffin.

"Well, I think I can speak for us all – we're glad to have you back," he said seriously.

"Yeah, man," Sam mumbled, nodding in my direction.

"Same," Quil and Embry said at the same time around mouthfuls of cookies. I noticed that Quil seemed a bit hesitant – his typical jovial self nowhere to be seen. I made a mental note to find out what was going on with him when I had a minute – I needed to get to the bottom of whatever it was he was thinking when he ran off, as soon as possible.

"Thanks – I'm glad to be here," I replied.

"Aw, hell–" Emmett's baritone voice interrupted from the front entryway, as he rounded the corner into the kitchen. "Eddie, buddy – is it really you?" he joked, before charging me, wrapping my head in his sweaty armpit and screwing with my hair.

"In the flesh," I groaned, wrenching around in an attempt to get out of his mammoth grasp.

"Tell us about the old man, Edward. He a tight ass?" Quil piped in, just as Emmett released me from his headlock.

"I think you'll be able to figure that out for yourselves in time here, gentlemen," Carlisle said with a smirk as he too rounded the kitchen corner. Quil's eyes went as big as saucers, and the other guys quieted right down.

As he made his way to the table, I noticed that Carlisle had changed from his slacks and dress shirt into a pair of jeans and plaid button-up. "Charlie Swan" plaid. I literally snorted aloud. If he had come in wearing a cowboy hat, I probably would have shit myself.

"I'm Carlisle – for those of you who don't know," he started, motioning for us all to take a seat around the heavy wood table. "I used to live here at the Ranch years ago, and have had a hand in the operations of this place from behind the scenes for many years now. Charlie's a dear friend of mine, and I trust that out of respect for him, things will run as smoothly around here as ever, correct?"

Collective "yes, sirs" were heard all around.

"Good – I'm looking forward to getting to know you all better over my stay here, though for all intents and purposes, I do hope it's a short one. We can get down to details in a bit, but for now I'm thinking that these cinnamon buns look pretty fantastic – dig in, then we'll get on with the show, boys."

We spent the next half hour or so going over schedules for the week, and doing basic introductions with Carlisle. Bella returned just as we were finishing up, so I stuck around to help her with the dishes. It was nice to be able to be so open with one another and not have to worry about getting caught. We held hands, we hugged, we made faces at each other from across the room – nothing excessive, but it felt right. We quietly joked to one another about what we wanted to do tonight – Bella suggesting puzzles, me suggesting alphabetizing her books. We were being cheeky and we knew it, but it was fun, and helped put a smile back on her face.

After dishes, I finished up a few last minute odd jobs around the farm. Feeding the chickens was the last on my list. As I hauled my dented metal bucket filled with feed inside the coup, I reflected back on my first major job here – and how it truly was where it all began. Checking out Bella's ass in her jeans, getting framed by Jake – it seemed so long ago. I was continuously shocking myself with how much had changed in so little time, but I knew without a doubt that I wouldn't go back and change a second of it. Not even cleaning the shitty old chicken coup. The shitty old coup started me on a path to a productive future, and ultimately to Bella. Chicken crap and all, a part of me loved the place.

By the time I'd finished up my chores, Bella and Carlisle were already waiting for me in the truck to head to the hospital. The majority of the ride was spent with Carlisle asking Bella lots of questions – about school, the Ranch, her hobbies – and I was excited to see how well they got along. Carlisle was an easy person to talk to, but seeing him click so well with Bella made me realise how easily she would fit into every part of my life. I couldn't wait to introduce her to Esme.

At the hospital, Bella gave a wave to the receptionist at the front desk, and led the way to Charlie's room. Walking past the community health section reminded me of my stealthy theft at the sexual health fair, and brought a rush of heat to my groin as I recalled the use of the lifted products. I cursed myself for being such a horn-dog, and instantly shoved the thought aside as we approached Charlie's room.

Inside the room behind the curtain, a nurse was propping Charlie up in bed in preparation for lunch. I was shocked by the sight of him. Strong, capable Charlie looked neither strong nor capable. He was as pale as a ghost, and looked incredibly tired.

"Hey Dad," Bella said softly. "You've got some company."

"Well, well, well," he sighed, looking at me. "Just couldn't stay away, could ya, son?"

"Guess not, sir," I chuckled softly. "I'm glad you're doing ok."

"Minor details here," he replied, patting his chest. "Good to see you, Carlisle. I appreciate you both coming back."

"The pleasure's ours. Tomorrow might be the homecoming day, eh?" Carlisle asked. It was funny to hear him say "eh" like the rest of the gang up here. He never used it at home.

"That's what they're thinking, on certain conditions," he huffed. Charlie certainly didn't seem amused at any of the fuss being made over him.

"Which means rest. And you know I'll be enforcing that, right?" Carlisle said, the doctor in him coming out strong.

"Me too," Bella piped in as she removed the salt shaker from his tray.

"Would you mind if I took a look at your charts?" Carlisle asked. "I'd like to get some insight here."

"Have at 'er," Charlie responded with another roll of his eyes. "If they give you any grief, get 'em to page me." With that, Carlisle disappeared around the curtain and headed straight for the doctor's station.

"Can I get you anything else, Dad? More water?" Bella asked – always the helpful one in a crisis.

"Actually–" Charlie paused. "You could. I need to shave. Think you could track me down a razor?"

"Where the heck am I gonna find a razor at the hospital?" she asked.

"I don't know – try the gift shop? Maybe that place across the street?"

"Fine–" she sighed. "Wanna come, Edward?"

"I was actually hoping he'd stay," Charlie answered for me."We could, uh – catch up?"

"Yeah, I'll stay." I nodded at Bella, nervous at what Charlie was getting up to.

"Alright then – be back soon," Bella said with a smile, and took off the same way Carlisle did.

A few moments of uncomfortable silence passed between Charlie and me before he finally spoke.

"I'm glad you came, boy," he said sincerely.

"I don't know how long I'll be able to stay, but I wanted to help out – you guys did so much for me."

"Things going alright back home?"

"Yeah, really good. I've been working, staying out of trouble."

"That's good." He nodded as he fiddled with the ends of his mustache. "I think I'm gonna be needing some help."

"Well, I've started to pick up a lot of slack on the chores – everyone has," I explained, trying to reassure him.

"I know, boy, but I think I'm gonna need more permanent help than that. I'm getting up there, and this old ticker's not gonna take many more blows. I don't want to worry Bella, but this is serious, Edward. I'm gonna have to hire somebody."

"Oh," I paused, trying to take in what he was saying.

"This is something I've been thinking about for a while now, and you're free to do as you please – no hard feelings, but I think this would be good for you. You want the job, kid?" he offered. "I'll give you a contract and you'll be paid. The money can mostly go towards schooling for next year. Your room and board will be free."

"Really, sir? I don't know what to say." I was completely overwhelmed. Of course I wanted to stay, but it was so much so fast.

"You'd work really hard here – winter life is a whole other experience. I know you're setting up well back at home, and I respect that, so I want you to think really carefully about this. Take your time."

"Alright. Thank you, Charlie. I'll talk it over with Carlisle and think about it. I'll let you know soon," I replied. I excused myself to the bathroom, needing to get away to think.

Once I'd locked myself in the sterile stall, my brain was overrun with thoughts and possibilities. I was ecstatic over the chance to stay here, but I couldn't help but wonder if taking the job was an easy way out. It would have been physically easy to go home, but a stronger emotional struggle. If I stayed, it would be the reverse, so it wasn't an altogether easy choice either. I didn't want to disappoint Esme and Carlisle, but I didn't want to disappoint Bella either. I needed some time.

I splashed my face with water a few times and headed back to Charlie's room. Both Bella and Carlisle had returned and were ready to head out so Charlie could get some rest. We all said a quick goodbye and headed for the truck.

On the way back to the Ranch, I was especially quiet. So much so that Bella had even mouthed at me, "What's wrong?" a couple of times. I tried to reassure her that I was just tired, but I got the feeling she wasn't convinced.

I wanted to tell her everything, but I needed a made-up mind first. Charlie's sneaky way of getting me alone at the hospital led me to believe that he wanted Bella somewhat protected from the seriousness of his health and situation. I had also realized that in order for me to accept the job, I needed to first come clean about my relationship with Bella. I had to consider the possibility that Charlie would retract his offer once he found out. Either way, keeping it from Bella was something I didn't want to do, and I promised myself I would tell her that night, once it had all sunk in.

When we got back, I occupied myself by helping Sam put winter tires on all the vehicles. Little puddles along the edges of the gravel were coated in a thin, shiny coat of ice, and I could only imagine that the colder it got, the worse the traction would be on both the gravel and paved roads. The wind had picked up, and with it came a sprinkling of wet snow. By the time that we finished late that afternoon, my fingers were numb with cold and we were soaked.

Bella was nowhere to be found inside, but giant pans of stir fry and rice had been prepared inside for us to help ourselves to. I shovelled down a plate and set out to find Carlisle.

I noticed the light on in Charlie's office, so I figured that was my best bet. I knocked on the door, and was surprised when Quil opened it from the inside.

"Sorry – you guys busy in here?" I asked, feeling like a jerk for just barging in.

"Nope, just leaving," Quil said – he looked tired, his eyes were red and he was staring at the floor.

"You ok, man?" I asked, giving him a pat on the shoulder.

"Yeah, I think so. We'll catch up soon, eh?" he mumbled.

"For sure. Go get some food. Carlisle, you got a minute?" I asked, poking my head around Quil.

"Of course. What's up?" he asked, motioning for me to take a seat.

"Well," I sighed, "Something big."

"Go on," he replied, nervousness lingering in his voice. From behind Charlie's desk, Carlisle looked more intimidating than I had ever seen him, but I was relieved that he was here. I needed his guidance.

"Charlie offered me a job today. I could stay here. For the year." I put it all out there and sat back, waiting to see his reaction.

"Ok. What did you tell him?"

"That I needed to think about it. I want to, but I just – I don't know." Carlisle didn't say anything for a few moments, his fist held up by his mouth in the way it often was when he was deep in thought.

"Well, I have to say, Edward – I'm proud of you for not just jumping into this. But, if you see potential for yourself here, it could be an excellent opportunity."

"I do – I totally do. And I'd be close to Bella. I just don't want anyone to think I'm taking the easy way out. I don't want to disappoint you guys after everything."

Carlisle's chuckle caught me off guard. "Staying here is no easy way out, Edward. I'm glad that you're thinking of Esme and me – and we'd definitely miss having you around home– but we'd be seriously proud of you for this, too. We're proud of you no matter what, son."

Carlisle's reassurance was all I really needed. This was where I was meant to be, and I'd never felt more confident in that fact than I did at that moment. I couldn't wait to tell Bella.

"Thank you – seriously, thank you," I said. "I'm just hoping it all still stands after Charlie finds out about me and Bella."

"It will be fine, I'm sure. Did you eat?"

"I did. I was actually thinking of heading over to Bella's – I mean, if it's cool with you."

"Go," he chuckled again. "Just don't be back late. There's a curfew around here, and for now, that goes for you, too!"

I didn't waste another second. I left Carlisle and the main house with my blinders on, sights set on my girl.

**Thank you so much for reading and for reviewing. My apologies for the slight delay – I wanted to be sure I got it right. :) I'm half way on the next chapter already, so it shouldn't be long. Thanks again! xoxo**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N Huge thanks to my awesome beta Robzbeanie, and my wonderful prereader CShepherd91. I'm lucky to have you! xoxo**

I sprinted across the lawn towards Bella's place. The dried-up leaves and wet snow made for a crunchy, slippery mix beneath my feet. I couldn't wait to tell Bella about my decision to stay. I took the steps on Bella's porch two at a time, knocked softly on the door of her cabin and let myself in.

Bella was pacing in front of her couch, cradling her phone between her ear and shoulder. She motioned at me with her finger that she'd just be a second. I could tell by the tone of her voice that she was talking to Renee.

"I know – I'm so glad he's back. Yes, you can meet him," she giggled. "I don't know when."

"He's doing ok – more colour in his cheeks today. I know, Mom. I will. I love you, too. Bye."

She was wearing the baggy sweatpants that she always wore around her place, and they were hanging low on her hips – from what I could see, odds were very good that there was nothing beneath them. A faded, old t-shirt hugged her chest; the outlines I could see were making it clear there was nothing underneath there, either.

"You made it," she said as she pressed the end button on the phone twice, ensuring it was off. She crawled across the couch to my lap and sat in my favourite place – her knees on either side of my thighs. "You have no idea how much I missed you."

"I'm pretty sure I do," I sighed, as I ran my hands up the length of her back. Being back here with her like this still felt unreal – I could hardly contain myself, but at the same time I found it hard to move, to act. As tempted as I was to throw her over my shoulder, drop her on her bed and have my way with her, I felt guilty for being so damn selfish. Bella had a lot going on, and we had a lot to talk about. I had originally planned on waiting, following her lead – I would wait if I needed to.

"Remember that night here? When we started out like this?" she sighed into my neck. Her breath was heavy, her voice low. She moved her lips to my jaw, and started slowly spreading tiny kisses between words.

"I don't think I could ever forget," I groaned, feeling myself rise to the occasion. "But, do you want to talk about anything? What happened and stuff?"

She abruptly pulled back with wide eyes. "Why? You don't want to do this?"

"No – of course I do," I quickly reassured her. "I just want to make sure you're good, you know?"

"And that's why I love you," she smiled, placing my face in her hands. "But I want this–" she caught me completely off guard, grabbing my cock firmly in her palm, "first. We'll talk later. Please?"

That was all I needed to hear.

I pulled her close to me and kissed her harder than I ever had before. As her tongue grazed my teeth, I knew I was in trouble– the semi I'd been packing from the moment I laid eyes on her tonight was a semi no longer, and I feared for a moment that this was going to be over for me long before Bella needed it to be.

She squirmed in my lap, rubbing herself against me, and I almost lost it. I had to take the focus off of me if I wanted tonight to last.

I surprised her by cupping my hands beneath her ass. I scooped her up and she yelped, but wrapped her legs tightly around me, only breaking free when I bumped against her bed and tossed her gently beneath me. I stood back for a second – I had to see her, feel her. Her hair was spread out wildly around her face and she was chewing on her lip – eyes wide, cheeks pink.

I tugged hard on her sweats and as I had guessed, she was bare underneath. My memories of her didn't give any justice to the real thing – she was amazing. I slid my hand between her thighs, and was relieved to see that she was as worked up as I was. With my other hand, I slid her pants off completely, leaving her in nothing but the threadbare t-shirt.

I crawled up next to her, stopping at her hips, and pressed my lips to her most sensitive spot. At first she yelped, jumping away from me. "It tickles," she giggled, so I moved more deliberately – my hands firm on her sides, gentle pressure keeping her in place. This was something I wasn't all that familiar with, but it was Bella – I knew her, knew what she liked, and I'd always do my best to make it good for her.

I pushed my erection into the mattress as Bella's hips bounced and swirled beneath me. I could tell she was getting close – her incoherent but adorably sexy moans tipping me off that I was doing ok.

"Come up," she moaned breathlessly, her hands running wildly through my hair.

I climbed up towards her, leaned over as quickly as I could, and shuffled around for a condom in her nightstand. She snatched the tiny package from my fingers, pulled her t-shirt over her head and crawled up on her knees.

"Lie down," she commanded, again fiddling with her bottom lip between her teeth. This too was new for us, but I was more than willing to be at her mercy. She straddled my lap, rolled her hips and I was home.

Bella's moans were so quiet that I wasn't really sure I was hearing them. Everything was unbearably intense – the smoothness of her skin, the smell of her hair. I could feel her trembling above me, her skin both flushed and cool to the touch under a thin layer of sweat. Each little movement she made felt magnified – every thrust sending a shock of heat right through me.

It was only mere moments before I felt Bella's hand slip between us and start its familiar circular motion – a sign I'd learned meant she was close. I forced my eyes open – shut for fear of losing my shit too quickly – but I wasn't about to miss a second of the sight before me.

Bella propped herself up away from my shoulder, threw her head back – and that was it.

"Edward, I'm–" she gasped. The sight of her breasts heaving, the moan of my name, the light sting of her fingertips on my sides, the tightening all around me – all set me off. She dropped back to my chest, both of us shuddering, sweaty and breathless.

After we'd spent some time surfacing, we got up, cleaned up, then Bella grabbed us milk and cookies from the kitchen. I propped myself up in her bed, naked lounging my new favourite pastime. I knew now was the time to tell her about the offer.

"I have something I need to tell you," I said with as much seriousness as I could muster as she flopped down on the bed beside me. She'd thrown on a clean pair of those boy-type shorts, but nothing more.

"Wha?" she mumbled, her cheeks stuffed with cookies. She was adorable.

"I got crumbs in your bed," I joked, brushing off her sheets beside me. Cookies in bed probably wasn't the smartest plan.

"You're a fool," she mumbled again, rolling her eyes at me behind her big glass of milk.

"No, I actually do though – and it's serious," I replied. I took her milk from her hands and placed it on the table, then took her hands in mine.

"Um, ok," she replied nervously, "but if it's bad news, I'm kicking you out of my house."

"It's not."

"Then tell me. You're killing me here," she pouted.

"Ok – Charlie offered me a job."

"What? Where?" she asked, eyes wide.

"Here," I chuckled, realising she wasn't quite following me. "Picking up slack. I'd basically be Charlie's bitch. For the year."

"Oh my god, really?" she snatched back her hands in surprise. "What did you say?"

"I told him I'd think about it."

She paused for a moment. "You'd think about it? What's there to think about?" She looked sad. I needed to turn things around fast.

"I already did think about it. I've been thinking about it all day. I wanted to make the right choice, Bella – for my future, my career, us – everything. And I've made it. I'm gonna stay – I can't stay away from you anymore."

"Oh my god!" she shrieked, tackling me in a hug. "I can't believe you didn't tell me until now! You'll probably get that other cabin!" she shrieked, excited. "Me and Alice can help you fix it up – she likes that kind of thing."

"It doesn't really feel real yet, but I'm so happy," I said, kissing her forehead.

"I really can't believe it," she sighed, snuggling in closer.

"I'm even more freaked out about telling Charlie now, though," I groaned. "Think the offer will still stand when he finds out about us?"

"I've told you – don't worry about it." She chuckled, "If he acts like a jerk, he'll have the wrath of me to deal with, and that's not Charlie's forte – he deals with confrontation so much that when it comes to me, he just can't do it. I'm so freakin' happy Edward. Finally some good news."

We spent the rest of the evening holed up in Bella's bed. We talked about my permanent spot, and what that would mean to the Ranch. Bella also gave me a rundown on what to expect for winter – long, cold days and very little sunlight. I couldn't even begin to wrap my brain around it and figured it would be something I'd have to live through to understand.

Just before curfew, I groggily pulled my clothes back on, kissed Bella goodnight, and headed for the main house. I wondered how things would change when and if I was an employee – though I mostly wondered if Charlie would set limits on our time together. We were both adults, but we would sort of still be under his "roof," which complicated things.

Back in the main house, most of the lights were off except for the one in Charlie's office and one of the dimmer ones in the kitchen. I quietly headed in the direction of the fridge – my evening activities with Bella leaving me with quite an appetite.

I was surprised to see Quil sitting mostly in the dark alone at the dining room table, absentmindedly stirring around a spoon in a steaming mug.

"Hey man," he acknowledged me first without looking up.

"Hey – you don't look so good," I said, pulling up a chair across from him.

"Ya, well, you do. Asshole." He smirked at me, showing a glimpse of his regular self.

"Ha," I huffed. "So, what's up?"

"I don't know," he mumbled, eyes back down on the table.

"I heard you left."

"I did."

"Why? I thought things were going ok?"

"They were. I just – ugh. I'm so sick of talking about this shit," he groaned.

"It's cool, man. We don't have to–" I stopped, about to get up from my chair. If he wasn't ready or willing, I wasn't going to push him.

"No. We do. Sit," he directed, cracking his knuckles. "I just miss my family – I miss Jake. I know Sam and Embry are here, but they've got each other, and it's not the same. Everyone in our family that's left is screwed up, but Jake's been doing good. We've always stuck together. I know it's dumb, but I just wanted to go back to that."

"I'm sure Charlie would let you see and visit him, but running isn't the answer, man."

"I know. Rose said I have tunnel vision – I act without looking at any consequences or something. And then Charlie had this heart attack, and I don't know–" he trailed off.

"Don't know what?"

"I felt guilty," he said, finally meeting my eyes. "He's been like a dad to us, and I've caused him all kinds of stress and shit. Everyone's been telling me not to blame myself, but I can't help it."

"Hey – I know they've said it, but I will too. It's not your fault. We all make mistakes. It's not the mistakes that matter – it's what you learn from them. Listen to me. I'm like a poster child for this place," I chuckled. Quil snorted, giving a slight hint of a grin.

"I'm glad you came back, Eddie. You're a good guy."

"Thanks. I missed you guys." I wanted to tell him that I was staying, but I didn't want to count my chickens just yet. I figured it was best to wait until details were solidified with Charlie.

"You fit in good here. I didn't think it would happen – especially after all the shit with Jake – but it did. One thing though–"

"What's that?"

"You be good to Bella – you know I know what's happening there, man. Remember that the girl's got about 15 brothers as far as we're all concerned."

"Emmett already beat ya to it, dude. He put it nicely, but I know he'd skin me alive if I ever hurt her. I won't though – it's the real deal," I foolishly grinned. When it came to Bella, I couldn't hide it – I was head over heels.

"I trust ya. I'm gonna try to head to bed. Have yourself a good one, eh?"

"You too, man."

As Quil headed for the front door, I headed for the fridge. I heated up and quickly shovelled in some leftover stir-fry, then made my way to the bathroom to get ready for bed. While brushing my teeth, I ran over possible explanations that I could give Charlie, but nothing was forming the way I needed it to. Either way, it was too late to turn around. Everything – hiding my relationship with Bella, the fact that I was in love with her, the fact that I did want to stay and make it work – would be revealed in the morning, and as I climbed into bed I prayed with every fiber of my being that everything would in fact work out alright.

**Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. The end is near – I can't believe it! :'D I forgot to add last time that all of my fics can now be found on www(dot) adifferentforest (dot)com. If you haven't been over there yet, check it out! xoxo**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N Major thanks to my beta Robzbeanie, and my prereader CShepherd91. Without them, this fic would be messy and I'd be a wreck. Thank you guys so, so much. **

Way too early the next morning, I awoke to the smell of frying bacon drifting into the den and a bright blast of sunlight sneaking through the blinds. Before I fell asleep, I'd run several potential scripts I could use on Charlie through my head, but nothing seemed quite right. The thought that I'd awake and the right words would magically appear was apparently a naïve one.

I ran into Emmett and Rose on my way to the kitchen – they were heading out early to run some errands in town before they picked up Charlie from the hospital. Emmett told me there was a heap of food, as well as "the little hyper one" waiting for me in the kitchen.

Sure enough, huddled around a pan full of bacon and a magazine were Alice and Bella. Their voices were low but their giggles were unmistakeable.

"What's so funny, ladies?" I asked, startling them both.

"Oh – hey! I made bacon!" Bella grinned, thrusting a plate in my direction. "Alice is thinking that a country-chic décor plan is the way to go."

"What are you talking about?" I chuckled, shaking my head at their early morning absurdity.

"For your place," she said matter-of-factly.

"Wait – what place? She knows?" I asked quietly. I was a little disappointed that Bella had spilled the news before I had a chance to talk to Charlie.

"I won't say anything, Edward," Alice quickly interjected. "Bella was practically bursting, so I knew something was up – she needed to tell somebody. It's safe with me, I swear."

"Nobody – not even Jasper, ok?" I demanded. I was too close to this for it to all explode somehow.

"Not even Jasper," she said, placing her hand over her heart. "But anyway – what do you think of throw pillows?" she asked seriously, struggling to keep a straight face.

"First of all, why is this all so funny – and secondly, why are you "designing" my theoretical home?"

"Alice wants to go to school for interior decorating. It'd be good practice," Bella shrugged.

"I'll tell ya what – let me talk to the old man first. After that, if everything goes as planned – as long as it's warm and clean, I don't care what you do with it. Deal?" I resigned. They were having fun and I wasn't about to ruin it – it didn't matter at all to me where I stayed or what it looked like, so long as it was here.

"Why don't we all go take a look at the old shack?" Bella suggested. "I'm almost positive it's where you'll be staying – I don't know where else Charlie could put you."

"Yeah – let's do that. I need to keep busy or I'm gonna go crazy," I sighed.

"Well, start here–" Bella reached over and uncovered a heavy metal pan on the stove and stuck two thick pieces of French toast with a fork. She plopped them next to the mountain of bacon on my plate, and shoved it closer in my direction. "We'll go look, then you can finish up your chores while Charlie gets settled." She gave me a quick kiss on the cheek, then slid the maple syrup down the counter at me. Her confidence in all of this was putting me at ease – I only wished I could somehow siphon some of it off of her.

After I finished up my breakfast, we made our way out to the old cabin. Bella led us on a shortcut through the pasture that I didn't know about, and we passed Sam and Embry already at work beneath the hood of the tractor next to the barn. It was chilly out again, but the sun glaring down on us was providing a nice break from the cold and giving the guys a chance to finish up outdoor work that would soon be impossible.

After we passed the first hill in the pasture, Bella and I joined hands while Alice tiptoed her way around cow patties – or any pile of dirt/mud she automatically assumed was a cow patty. I noticed Eclipse grazing – she had a flannel blanket over her back, but she looked healthy and well.

"There it is." Bella pointed out ahead of her. "That's the one."

Hidden just behind the treeline was a cabin very similar to Bella's – if hers had been through a tornado, that is. Mouldy, dried-up leaves covered the roof and the entire front door step. The weathered wooden siding made it camouflage perfectly with the dense brush surrounding it. It had a pair of small windows so clouded up with dust that you couldn't see inside. Moss clung to the doorframe, while cobwebs spun around in the breeze beneath the porch railing.

"Holy crap, Bella," Alice exclaimed. "Are you sure about this? It looks like a shed."

"Yeah, I'm sure. It's old, but it's not that bad – just look inside, k?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa – I'm waiting here. You guys go ahead."

"How are you supposed to "design" if you haven't even seen inside?" I teased.

"Mice, Edward," she replied sternly. "I'll die. You tell me when it's clear, or you'll be carrying my fainted body back to the main house and everyone will freak out and ask questions, and yeah – not good."

"She's serious – it's not pretty," Bella grinned, rolling her eyes behind Alice's shoulder.

"Alright – follow me."

With Bella right behind me, we climbed the front steps. Despite the overgrowth, the steps felt sturdy beneath my weight, which was definitely reassuring.

"Do you have the key?" I asked, it just occurring to me that we'd need to get in somehow.

"Key?" Bella laughed. "Welcome to the rural North, Edward," she chuckled, pushing past me straight through the unlocked door.

What I saw inside shocked me. Cobwebs and an inch of dust and grime covered nearly every surface, but remarkably, it was alright. Decent, in fact. There was no furnace, but a wood burning stove was tucked in the back corner. A large wooden bed frame was pushed up against the rear wall.

"So?" Bella asked. She looked nervous.

"You know – this could actually work out ok. I like the table," I said as I brushed my fingertips through the dust on the heavy round wooden table in the centre of the space. It had three mismatched chairs tucked beneath it, but it looked strong. The whole place was well constructed – it just needed a facelift.

"If you hate it, it's ok. I know this–" she pointed around, "Isn't exactly what you're used to."

"No – it's good. I don't need anything fancy. It just needs some TLC." I turned a tap in the sink, but was met with a rattle and nothing but air.

"There are plumbing and power – same as my place – it just needs to be hooked up again. Charlie actually lived here, and no one has since."

"He did?"

"Yep. Actually, Emmett stayed in here for about a week a few years back, but it wasn't for long."

"Why hasn't he stuck anyone else in here? You guys could use the space," I asked, baffled.

"Don't repeat this, but he always said this one was special. That's why I think he'll give it to you," she smiled.

"Hello? Have you been eaten by sasquatch?" Alice hollered from the deck.

"It's clear – haven't seen any critters yet," Bella called back at her.

"Well – it's surprisingly promising. I think I can work with this," she mumbled, taking in the space around her.

"I think we're getting ahead of ourselves here," I replied, realising that it wouldn't be long until Charlie was back. "It's now or never, right?"

"Right," Bella sighed. "Go finish up your chores – we'll find you later, k?"

I left the girls in the cabin and met up with Sam and Embry. I gave them a hand on the tractor even though I knew next to nothing about mechanics. Sam was patient, and it was a good place to be – I'd be able to see Charlie arriving from where they were working.

Just as we drained the last of the oil from the engine, I could hear the rumble of Emmett's truck in the driveway. I watched as he pulled up close to the front step – Charlie got out of the back seat, and I could tell he was moving a little slower than usual. Sue hopped out of the other side, followed by both Emmett and Rose.

"Earth to Edward?" Embry called out, smacking me in the shoulder. "You gonna pass me that wrench or is it stuck to your hands?"

"Sorry, man," I said, snapping out of my daze. I handed him the wrench and rag I'd been holding.

"You somewhere else there, Eddie?" Sam asked from beneath the hood.

"Yeah, you could say that," I groaned, embarrassed that they noticed.

"What's up?"

"I've just got some stuff to talk to Charlie about."

"Bella stuff?" Embry asked with a smirk. He'd opened up a lot to me since I'd first got here – the kid that used to be so shy was now turning in to a typical lippy teenager.

"Maybe – I don't know," I stammered, not wanting to get into details with them, too.

"Shit. Good luck, buddy – you're gonna need it," Embry teased, then tossed the lid from the fresh bucket of oil right at my head.

I grabbed another rag from the pile beside me, twisted it up quick and snapped it at him.

"I don't have time to screw around, you two," Sam grumbled, elbow deep in the tractor. "Embry, go get me that flashlight. And you," he looked right at me, "Come back here when you can think, ok?"

"Deal. Wish me luck," I said with a sigh, and headed for the house to get cleaned up.

Inside I went straight for the washroom. I went to the one by my old room upstairs – the familiarity comforting. I washed my hands, then my face twice. I put on extra deodorant – I definitely needed it – and ran to my room to quickly change my shirt.

I started down the hall towards the stairs down to Charlie's bedroom. I'd never actually stepped foot in Charlie's room before. It was common knowledge amongst all of the guys that his room was completely off limits. None of us ever questioned it – for a guy who gave every part of his home, life and business over to a bunch of strange kids, it made sense he'd want a place of his own.

Just as I hit the bottom stair, I met up with Sue coming out of Charlie's room.

"Hey – how are you, Edward? It's good to see you back," she said in a soft voice. She had a calming personality – for which I was grateful at the moment.

"Thank you, I'm glad to be here," I replied, clearing my throat. "Do you think it would be ok if I talked to Charlie for a minute?"

"I don't think that'll be any trouble. In fact, he's been expecting you," she smiled. "Just let him know I'll be back with lunch soon, but take your time." She patted her warm hand on my shoulder as she walked past me up the stairs. Something about the simple gesture put me momentarily at ease. Not enough to calm my pounding heart or dry my sweaty palms, though.

I knocked twice on Charlie's door – his familiar gruff voice barked out for me to come in.

"Hey, Sir," I said quietly, as I opened the door and took a look around the room. It was much bigger than I'd expected – big enough that a king size bed, a love seat and chair and a small fireplace were all housed inside with plenty of space to spare. "Can I come in for a minute?"

"Sure. Welcome to 'Casa Charlie' – don't get comfortable," he grunted with a grin. He looked much better than he had at the hospital, but still looked tired.

"I didn't want to bother you, but we do need to talk."

"That we do," he nodded. "So, son? What do you think? We get you for the long haul?"

"Well, yeah –" I stopped, clearing my throat. I sat down on the edge of the chair near the foot of Charlie's bed. "But there's something we need to talk about first."

"Go on." He eyed me curiously, his hand going straight to his moustache.

"Um, it's about Bella. And me. Me and Bella?" I spilled.

He stared back at me behind a raised eyebrow.

"You and Bella what, son?"

I cleared my throat and went for it – "We're seeing each other. We're together."

It was out, and Charlie said nothing. He just propped himself up a little higher on his pillow. I didn't dare ask if he needed any help.

"Jesus, kid. You trying to give me another heart attack?" he finally replied.

"No, Sir. I'm sorry – we should've told you sooner. I shouldn't have–" Anxiety was mounting, my carefully planned speech long forgotten. I was flying by the seat of my pants and was quickly going under.

"Stop it, Edward," he mumbled.

"I just didn't know how to–" I kept going, my half-ditched attempt at pleading my case failing miserably. I was stumbling and stuttering like a fool.

"Edward, stop," he replied more firmly this time.

"I'm sorry," I sighed, eyes glued to the ground.

"Let me ask you something, boy." He took a long, slow drink from the glass of water beside his bed. "Do you think in all my years at this I've never had an idiot boy sneak out on my watch?"

"Um – no, Sir?"

"Right. This is no surprise to me, Edward," he stated, shaking his head. "I've known for a while now."

"You did?" I looked up at him, shock all over my face.

"I did."

"Then – wha – why didn't you say anything?"

He paused again and picked up a small picture frame that was sitting on his bedside table.

"Look – that girl?" he sighed as he passed the picture frame in my direction. "She's everything to me. I know I won't be able to take care of her forever."

The picture was of Bella, Charlie and a cow. Bella was holding up a blue ribbon with 4-H written across it. She was missing teeth – was all smiles and messy hair.

"I don't know what to say. I really am sorry, Charlie. I didn't mean for this to go this way. It shouldn't have been a secret–"

"She's a good girl – she knows what she wants, and she deserves to be treated well," he continued, seemingly ignoring everything I was saying. "I was a young dumb-ass in love once, too." he chuckled, but it turned to a cough.

"Is it still ok if I stay?" I asked. I'd experienced plenty of vagueness from Charlie – this was a situation where I needed it to be clear.

"It is, son. But remember what you're here for. No special treatment – no foolin' around. You and Bella are adults, but when you're on my clock, what I say goes – got that?" he asked, the familiar, strong Charlie showing his face again.

"Yes, Sir."

"Alright then, boy. Welcome aboard."

The entire next week went by in a blur of excitement, hard work and nervousness. After I had left Charlie's room that day, I went straight for Bella. I heard "I told you so" more times than I could count, but I didn't care. All of the stress – the weight on my shoulders – was gone. Bella and I could just be. I had countless opportunities ahead for work/schooling, and I got to stay with my new friends.

After I told Bella, I spoke to Carlisle first. He was proud of me for coming clean to Charlie, and was excited for the opportunities that I had ahead of me. I phoned Esme next, and though she was a little sad that I wouldn't be returning, she was very understanding. She had told me that she'd get right to work on boxing up some of my things for me, but insisted that I return home at Christmas to retrieve the rest. She even threatened to hold my CD collection hostage until I came to visit.

The news was spread officially to everyone else throughout the week. Everyone basically knew about Bella and me, but the guys were all surprised to hear that I was sticking around for the winter.

Emmett was particularly relieved – with Charlie taking on less of the work, Emmett was filling many of Charlie's past duties, which meant less time for his programs at the school. Charlie had retired himself to office duties only, after some prodding from Bella, for at least the next few months. Carlisle had helped by getting him a head start on some grant and funding applications, but the paperwork alone for the Ranch was a full time job.

As soon as Emmett found out that I was staying, he made arrangements with the principal for me to take over the sports program for him, and I was beyond excited at the idea. It was exactly the type of experience I needed, and having Emmett as a guide was great.

I didn't see as much of Bella as I would've liked during my first few nights as a permanent resident. Charlie had scheduled me for night shifts in the grain dryer – which meant long hours of doing nothing but reading and waiting all by myself, making sure that nothing caught on fire and taking a moisture sample here and there. Part of me knew it was a necessary task, but the other part of me wondered if Charlie stuck me out there on purpose. We agreed that my hours of work would be 6am to 6pm, with occasional overtime as needed. Apparently, it was needed instantly, but I wasn't about to tell him no. Bella and I agreed that we'd sneak away to celebrate that weekend, and I couldn't wait.

As Bella had predicted, Charlie did assign me his old cabin as my living quarters. Jasper and I spent a solid afternoon sweeping, scrubbing and otherwise tidying up the place. Despite our hard work, Jasper informed me that before I'd be able to move in, serious renovations were in order. Apparently, there was a problem with the water lines, which meant that I was stuck on the guest couch for the time being.

Friday finally rolled around, and I was relieved to have a night off to relax and spend some time with Bella. I finished up dinner with the group and went upstairs for a long shower. When I came downstairs, everyone had cleared out but Bella.

I grabbed her by the hand and pulled her into the pantry with me.

"Hey you–" she cooed, pulling up on her tiptoes to meet my lips. "I've got something to show you at the cabin – the plumber came out."

"Right now?" I groaned. It was already dark out, and a combo of rain and snow was falling. Combined with the frigid northern winds, it was miserable outside.

"Yes, now. It'll only take a minute."

"Can we stop at your place first?" I teased, pulling her hips tightly to mine.

"Later. Maybe," she smirked.

"Fine. Let's go." We grabbed our coats and took off out the backdoor.

Bella led the way to the cabin, the yard lights lighting most of the way there. I could see lights on inside, meaning that the power must have been restored problem-free. I was grateful – the sooner I could get off that couch, the better.

I also noticed a pair of navy blue curtains in the window – I hadn't been back to the cabin in days, so it was a surprise.

"Who put the curtains up?" I asked, stopping at the steps.

"Oh – I just threw those up," Bella shrugged. "Come check this out though." She extended her hand to me, motioning me forwards. She had a huge smile on her face – I immediately knew something was up.

I twisted the doorknob and pushed the heavy door forward.

I was floored.

"Welcome home!" everyone cheered – and I mean everyone. Sam, Embry, Seth and Quil were all sitting around the table. Carlisle, Charlie and Sue were standing in front of a roaring fire, and Rose and Emmett were curled up on an overstuffed couch. Jasper and Alice were perched on the edge of the bed – which was made up with a thick, navy blue comforter and a ton of pillows. It was a tight fit in the small space, but everyone found a spot.

The cottage looked amazing – you'd have never known it was abandoned for years by the sight of it. Nothing was fancy, but it was warm, cozy and clean.

"How did you guys do this?" I gaped – completely in shock. I noticed a small TV and a CD player set up, and a fuzzy area rug next to the bed. There were some mismatched dishes stacked on the counter next to a microwave, and an apartment-sized fridge had been moved in. A dresser was tucked against the back wall, and I saw a pair of picture frames on top, which I made note to take a closer look at later.

"We wanted to surprise you – I picked out some stuff in town with Bella. Charlie let us have it at," Alice smiled in his direction.

"Think this will do you ok?" Charlie nodded at me.

"It's perfect – thanks, you guys – I'm shocked!"

"Can we eat this now – I'm hungry," Seth said, pointing at a huge cake on the table. The words "Welcome home, Eddie" were piped on the top in bright blue icing.

We spent the next hour or so eating cake and visiting. Charlie and Carlisle shared a few stories about their days at the Ranch – the story about Charlie lighting his area rug on fire, complete with Carlisle pointing out the burn mark still on the floor, was a definite favourite.

Amongst the mingling, I had a chance to take a closer look at everything. The pictures on top of my dresser were my favourite part – one of me, Carlisle and Esme and another of me and my mom. When Bella caught me looking, she came up behind me and explained that she had Esme scan and email them to her. The thoughtfulness of the gesture – of putting the whole place together for me – was incredible.

As everyone started trickling out for the evening, I made sure to give special thanks to Alice, who said she was more than happy to help. Carlisle was the last to leave – he stuck around a little later so he and I could go over the plans for the next morning, as he was catching a flight back home.

"So – you're happy?" Bella asked, flopping down beside me on the couch once we were finally alone. I noticed a bottle and two champagne glasses on the coffee table in front of us.

"I honestly don't think I've ever been happier," I sighed, taking her hand in mine. "I can't believe you guys did this for me."

"You're doing a lot for us by staying. I just want you to feel at home," she shrugged, picking up the bottle in front of us.

"I do – I've never felt more at home. Champagne?" I asked, kind of surprised.

"Sparkling cider, but whatever," she giggled, pouring us each a glass. "This is a big day – a big deal."

Sitting there on that couch, in my cabin, with my girlfriend, I was beyond grateful that I took a chance and gave this place a shot on that day only mere weeks behind us. I knew there would be struggles, there would be hard times, but I also knew I now had support and love around me that could get me through anything. I was willing to take charge of my life, accept responsibility for wrongs I had done, and show – not tell – others that I could do right. I didn't have answers for what would come next, but I had this – and for now, it was perfect.

"Cheers to our futures, Edward," Bella smiled wide, raising her glass. "Cheers to us."

"Cheers to our future, cheers to us, and cheers to the Ranch."

THE END.

**Well, almost. There will be a short epi posted in the next week or so. I'll save my goodbyes and my thank you spiel for that. ;) Thank you so much for reading, reccing, and reviewing – you guys are wonderful!**


	26. Epilogue

**A/N Here's the epi, folks! That's all she wrote! Big thanks are in an AN down below.**

"Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife – to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, as long as you both shall live?"

"I do," Emmett nodded to the Justice of the Peace, his chin quivering as his eyes welled up with tears. I caught eyes with Bella – she was standing up at the front with Rose, and couldn't have looked happier.

To see Emmett, the hyper-masculine goofy guy with tears in his eyes was quite something, and he made no attempt to hide it. Charlie stood up next to him and casually passed him a Kleenex from his suit pocket.

The wedding was held outdoors under a big canopy in the middle of a field that had been cleared out in preparation, and the weather had finally cooperated perfectly. Wildflowers surrounded the ceremony, and sunshine was breaking through the trees, casting moving shadows on the guests.

Rose was a knockout on a regular day, but she looked absolutely beautiful standing up at the makeshift altar. She and Emmett spent months arguing over the type of wedding they wanted. Emmett wanted a casual country get together, while Rose wanted a formal, elegant affair. They finally reached an agreement – the ceremony would be held at the Ranch, and the reception would be held at the lavishly decorated community hall in town. Their wedding was a testament to two of the most important fundamentals of a relationship – compromise and balance. Even though they didn't see eye to eye on a lot of the details, they made it work, and made it suit them both.

As the JP recited words of wisdom to the crowd, I thought back on my time here. The winter was emotionally long and hard on everyone. Tension ran high. After Charlie's heart attack, a lot of changes with staffing and responsibilities came about, and that led to a lot of arguments. There were arguments between Sam and Emmett, between Charlie and Emmett, between Charlie and Quil. With Seth being new to the program, he brought a whole slew of troubles with him. His adjustment hadn't been an easy one. Finally, a solid eight months later, things were starting to settle down.

In addition to the emotional challenges of the winter, the physical difficulties that came with the true North were outstanding. The days were dark, cold and exceptionally long. Just going from the barn to the main house was rough. My ears would sting, and my eyelids would freeze together after only being out for a matter of minutes. My clothes were constantly damp, and I thankfully learned the true art of layering. There were stretches of days where you couldn't leave the property, as our road would be completely snowed in and we'd have to wait to be plowed out. Unlike winter back home, there were no breaks. No warm days where the snow would disappear for awhile. It was pure winter, and pure cold all the time.

I flinched a little in surprise as Esme reached out for my hand. She was always so emotional at weddings, and it was sweet. She and Carlisle had flown up for the big event, and I was glad to see them. Staying was the right choice, but I missed having them around.

Carlisle was right when he said that staying wouldn't be easy. Not only was the work hard, but my new relationship presented challenges of its own.

I started noticing changes in Bella when the snow finally came to stay. As the dark days settled in, she slept more and more and was constantly tired. When I brought up my concerns to Rose, she gave me the rundown on Seasonal Affective Disorder – or SAD. Bella didn't want me to worry and didn't like talking about it. I went through periods of blaming myself, and got angry when she shut down. It was eye-opening and devastating to see first-hand, but we made it through. Bella was a fighter – she never gave up – and after a few weeks of dreariness, she was back to her regular self. Being on the outside of mental illness, I knew there were aspects I'd never fully understand, but I did my best to learn more and be as supportive as I could. As time went on, the close friendship Bella shared with Jasper made more and more sense to me – they could relate to each other in ways others couldn't.

Jasper and Alice had jumped through many hurdles of their own. Everyone knew they were a couple, but they were still taking things slow. Jasper would pull away at times, but Alice was steady. She didn't let him shut himself off and seemed to know just what he needed and when he needed it. They weren't jumping into anything, but the bond between them was clear.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." The crowd erupting in applause snapped me out of my head, and I snapped a few pictures as Emmett dramatically dipped Rose back for a kiss.

A few hours later, I found myself sitting at a table with Esme, Carlisle, Alice and Jasper. Dinner had finished and the dance was just getting underway. The community hall had been completely transformed with twinkling lights, candles and flowers – the hard work the girls had put in getting it ready had clearly paid off. Bella and Sue's daughter, Leah, had already kicked off their shoes and had taken to the dance floor. They were partnered up with a pair of very enthusiastic little boys.

"She looks really good, Edward," Esme leaned over and called out to me over the music. "You should get out there!"

We had gone to Seattle to stay with Esme and Carlisle over Christmas, and as I had expected, Esme fell in love with Bella. She took full advantage of having another woman in the house – they got their nails done, went to a bistro for lunch, went shopping together. Seeing them get along so well just made me love her more. I was a part of her family, and she was a part of mine.

We caught up with Angela and Ben while I was home as well. Angela and Bella hit it off – their interests in the same books and movies made for easy conversation. I was pleased to see that Ben was back in school and doing a lot better at staying out of trouble. I'd become his northern pen pal, which had worked out well. For a kid who couldn't express himself well in person, he was great on email – I'd get weekly updates of at least a couple thousand words on his thoughts and ramblings.

"Edward, buddy," Jake's deep voice called out from behind me. He had come back to town for the wedding and to visit his brother and cousins. I expected it to be awkward, as I hadn't seen him since that horrible night in the very hall we were sitting in, but it wasn't. He was getting his life together, and I was happy for him and his family. "Think it'd be ok if I asked your lady there to dance?"

"It's fine with me, man. Just stay off her toes, eh?"

I watched Bella and Jake sway to the somewhat slow song, and felt relieved. It was pretty incredible that we'd come far enough that this was ok. Bella and I were going to be living in the city in the fall, and we'd probably see a bit more of Jake. Just a few days prior to the wedding, we'd received our acceptance letters in the mail. Bella had re-enrolled in the animal health tech program, and I had enrolled in a social work program. Bella was nervous to go back to the city, but since we were going together this time – moving into a place together – we both had high hopes for success.

We had made the decision to see where the year would take us, but both of us felt strongly that we would end up back at the Ranch. It was familiar, and it was home.

After the song ended, I made my way over to Bella and Jake. I wasn't overly jealous, but it felt natural to move in and dance with my girl. Jake gave Bella a hug, saying he was leaving and that he'd stop by the Ranch before he left for home. We shook hands, and I pulled Bella back to the dance floor, finding a spot in the middle amongst the growing crowd.

"You look amazing, you know," I said into her forehead, leaving my lips pressed there.

"You clean up pretty nice yourself," she smirked.

"Did you have fun today?"

"Tons of it," she sighed as we swayed. "But I'm tired. Aww!" she cooed, nodding in the direction of Emmett and Rose dancing close together while they whispered to one another. They were completely lost in each other – unaware of anyone or anything going on around them.

"Think that will be us someday?" I chuckled, trying to keep things light.

"I know it will be," she said softly, wrapping her fingers in mine. "We're the real thing."

The rest of the night was spent mingling and dancing. Alice caught the bouquet, and Quil battled it out with Seth for the garter. Older women came up to Bella and me all night asking when it would be our turn. We grinned at each other and gave the same, "Oh, who knows!" answer to the nosey biddies, but it was exciting at the same time. We were young, and who knew what the future would bring. One thing for sure though, was that we were in it together – ready to face any obstacle that life threw at us.

_**Many, many years later…**_

This kid was new. At three minutes to six am, I was about to call this attempt at punctuality a fail.

Much to my surprise, the front door swung open and the boy burst through it while simultaneously attempting to button his coat and pull on his boot. He was 18, tall, thin. His hair was cut in a Mohawk, and he had a sorry attempt at a goatee growing in patches along his chin.

He was going to be a challenge – at least until he realised his potential.

"You're late," I barked, kicking at the tire of my quad with my boot.

"What? It's not even six yet!" he huffed, pulling himself together in front of me.

"It's not six yet, Sir," I grunted. My daughters had been telling me to let the "Sir" thing go – that it was "old school." I couldn't. Bella understood – she knew the history. She was the history. "I know what time it is, boy, and I also know what I told you. Do you always leave things to the very last minute?"

"I guess so," the kid mumbled, confusion and defiance written all over him.

"In your life, kid, you're gonna meet many people who have high expectations of you." I locked eyes with him, remembering the wise words from a very wise man just as they were presented to me. "You aren't just going to meet those expectations. You're gonna go above and beyond them, then blow them out of the water, you hear?"

"Um, yes, Sir?" he choked out.

"Alright, kid," I nodded, satisfied in the delivery of my first lesson in my new role. With Emmett retiring to focus on other things, it was my turn to carry the torch.

"Follow me, boy. Today, you're doing the chicken coop."

**THE ACTUAL END. **

**This whole thing wouldn't be half of what it is without the help of my amazing beta, Robzbeanie (swill39 over on ADF). She's been reliable, insanely helpful, and has become a friend through this whole process. Thank you so much, bb. Major thanks also to my lovely British prereader, CShepherd91. Her cheerleading, guidance and reassurance have been wonderful. Looking forward to working with you both on future projects!**

**Thank you to everyone who has read, rec'd and reviewed this story. Starting out a little late in the fandom, it was nerve-wracking to throw something out there, but you guys have made it so much fun. Thanks for sticking with me, and for all the kind words. **

**It'll be hard to let these guys go, and there may be outtakes sometime down the road. Let me know if you have any suggestions! xoxoxoxo**


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